F3 New Orleans

Author: Rudy

  • Making Progress on the Posterier Chain – from Triple Shift

    I hadn’t Q’d in sometime so when I was called out to lead the men of the Renaissance, I gladly stepped up. Ever since my first few workouts in 2014, I recognized that almost everyone in the F3 Nation is always doing some sort of vertical or horizontal press. Think overhead presses or Carolina Dry Docks and think Merkins. Ever since my first Red Hot Chili Pepper routine (20 decline merkins IC, 20 triceps dip IC, 20 Incline Merkins, and 20 Step Ups IC and then decrease to 15 reps, 10 reps and then 5 reps), I’ve been a little turned off on all the push type exercises. Well, that would change today.

    Warmarama – 10 LSS IC, 10 Arm Circles (forward and backward) IC, 10 Open the gate IC, 10 LS Merkins IC, 10 LS Parker Peters IC, and 10 LS Peter Parkers IC. Too much chatter and strange noises from Vagabond and Fracsac which almost threw me off my game.

    After the warmups farmers carry the dumbbells, kettlebells and sandbag and head to the foundry about a 1/3 mile away. I heard Wapner comment on the obvious that we would have to carry all the weights back to the starting point. Which I said, “That is the point of the workout.”

    THE THANG
    At the foundry, I told the PAX that we will work on the posterior chain so there would be a vertical pull (pull ups), a horizontal pull (2 handed body row or single arm bent over row), Bulgarian split squats (glutes), and then single leg deadlifts (hinge for glutes and hamstrings). After much chatter about the word posterior and other definitions that I threw out, I gave them instructions.

    5 pull ups
    10 two handed body rows or 10 single arm (each arm) bent over rows
    15 Bulgarian Split Squats each leg. The top of the back foot needs be flat behind you on a bench and the front foot need to be in front of the knee.
    20 single leg deadlifts with a weight in one hand.
    Hold a superman for the six
    I was hoping that we could do 5 rounds but only could muster 3 because of all the mumble chatter from the PAX and the form policing by me. Thumb War tried to hide by being far away, but I caught him.

    Head to the back of the museum for a 10 count Jackass Webb which is 10 burpees IC and 20 donkey kicks. Finish up with one Sunday Morning and head back to the flag with all the weights.

    I closed us out in a BOM (increased my testosterone) with a petition to God to give us the opportunities to be courageous, the opportunities to practice patience, the opportunities to lead our families and communities in humility. Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers with all the family drama and business challenges that I am going through! Praying that God’s will be done!

  • WE ARE F3 – AROO AROO AROO!!! – from Bushwacker

    This fall, some of the PAX of the Northshore will be CSAUPing at the Spartan Beast obstacle race near Dallas. There is a palpably intense excitement in the air and this beatdown was designed to make sure all in attendance felt it. YHC, along with some some kind and committed brothers, arrived at 5:15 to begin setting up. We just beat the pre-thangers back to the flag in time to get things started promptly.

    WARMORAMA

    Warm up consisted of briefly attended tabata, and a garbled pronouncement of rules, regulations, and “the way things aughta go”, which, thanks to Jose’s requisite comments and interjections of others, were immediately and throughout the course disregarded, slightly adopted, and outright ignored. But a great challenge was mostly bested and a fun time was had by all teams of 2 who attempted.

    1. Tire Shuttle – step in each of 6 tires while running through (QIC tripped and fell so never assume anything is TOO easy!)
    2.Sandbag StepUp – holding 50lb sandbag, 10 Step Ups on sea wall (MAY have forgotten to mention the step up part)
    3. Bucket Carry – 5gallon bucket filled with sand carried out and back
    4. Sledge Hammer Slam – 15 wacks on the tire with a 10lb maul
    5. Tire Toss – 2 tires tossed individually out and back
    6. Sled Drag – 2 45lb plates on a minil sled pulled out and back
    7. Battlerope – 3″ battlerope slung up and down for 15 reps
    8. Rope Climb w/ Cowbell (not the short crunchy-frogging runner) – climb rope appx 12′ and tap the bell. As indicated prior to start, if a PAX was unwilling or unable to complete an obstacle, they were to complete 10 Burpees and move on. However, the rare and awesome challenge that a rope hanging from a tree posed caused a bit of a pile up by the time QIC and partner Shooter arrived. Immediately Shooter was pulled in by the tractor beam as well
    9. Dummy Drag – appx 150lb hose dummy dragged out and back
    10. Tire Pull – giant tire with long rope attached, pulled length of rope
    11. Spear Throw – in addition to the Rope Climb, Farmer’s carry, Sand Bag, flags and cones our own Zoolander (aka Chaka Zulu)supplied his new favorite toy to be thrown at and stuck into a foam target strapped to a tree. However, our honorary FNG, Al Gore, let us know with great protest that we were committing arbocide and proceded to take picture of the crime scene, and tear down the foam target for good measure.
    12. Farmers Carry – set of appx 30lb logs with handles carried out and back
    13. Tire Flip – giant tire flipped end over end out and back
    14. Sawhorse Hurdles – 4 8′ sawhorses spaced 6′ apart hurdled over

    Strong Work, great fun, fantastic teamwork!

    COT

    Count, Name, Grappler demurred praying us out in lieu of Rev Russo.
    Just a small taste of thing to come in October, gentlemen. Thank you for allowing me to lead you in tackling this Fire/Spartan obstacle course

    Post Script: Many thanks to the many hands who made light work of picking up the coupons!

  • Shake it Up a Bit – from Goose

    After four or five Saturdays in a row including a game of some sort, YHC thought it prudent to shake things up a bit and bring back the 60 minutes of pain. Kinda like a weekday, but longer, and at a location with tons of options.

    After YHC drug Yankee Jeaux along for a warmup lap, a warmup of the usuals commenced with 10 fantastic PAX. Once completed, we grabbed gear, and YHC started to lead a mosey toward the track, which brought about much angst amongst the natives, especially those who feared the inevitable after having been absent for a couple of months. YJ reminded YHC that this was the two-year anniversary of his initial return after hiatus, which happened to be YHC’s 40th birthday beatdown, and where YJ happened to puke multiple times. The similarities to today were already astounding–and the stage was set for some potential pukage.

    We moseyed on the track up even with the 50 yard line where YHC explained that we’d be getting back to the ground after enjoying multiple weeks of games (which YHC has loved, btw). It’s been great, but the grinding season was upon us. The first grind would be a Dora, but with three men and four exercises. The PAX broke into 3-man teams, and each team set a man on each side of the track (at the 50, halfway point on the straight 100). On one side, the exercises were 200 merkins followed by 200 Morroccan Night Clubs, and on the other, they were 200 lunges (1:1) followed by 200 heels to heaven. The third man would run from one teammate to the other and take up the rep count, like an ordinary Dora, while his guy ran the next half loop to take over from guy 1. This ended up going as YHC expected–the half lap wasn’t so bad, but merkins while waiting for your teammates to get all the way back around to you was reminiscent of a few May beatdowns. Popeye and Valve throupled/quadroupled with the two 2.0’s, Darryl Strawberry and Jacknife, who moved as one. Sort of. While Honeysuckle, Popeye, and Valve seemed to have no trouble with this one, YHC felt sorry for those for whom running is a life-sucker, but these guys also happen to be the ones with the biggest hearts, and they were clearly pushing hard so as not to leave their teammates suffering longer than necessary.

    The second grind was like the first, except we moved over to the bleachers, and instead of one man running a half lap, he would run up or down the bleachers, and the exercises were done at the top and bottom. At the bottom, 200 dips and 200 LBC’s. At the top, 200 step-ups (1:1) and 200 air presses (overhead). The step-ups were the crux for this one, but the men powered them out in enough time for an Indian Run of epic/stupid proportions.

    The 10 were split into two teams of 5 and each was positioned at opposing ends of the track (50 yard line). The man in the back of each line had to run to the front of the other team’s line, where he would choose a type of transportation for that team while he was head of the line. This was done to provide some variation, but also to give the other line’s guy an actual chance of catching up. This went fairly well, and only a few times did multiple new leaders arrive at about the same time. YHC did observe a few interesting choices for transportation. One looked like a walk, but with knees ever-so-slightly elevated. Not sure what this one was called: Tiptoe-down-the-hallway-at-night walk? Dodging-dog-bombs-in-the-backyard walk? High Grass?

    The mosey back to the flag was understandably slow after this last routine, but we still had some time for a few rounds of Mary. YHC thought it would be fun to introduce some of the newer guys to the more creatively named core exercises, like Afflecks (formerly A-Rods: a combination of J-Los and Pickle Pounders) and Nolan Ryans.

    The Animal shirt was given clean for the first time because Pope received it but couldn’t be present to present it. It went to Captain D’s for his effort despite it not being a game day (the large majority of his posts have ended up being games).
    COT and prayers for the women on the ACTS retreat and a few families dealing with tragedy. Maneater graciously prayed us out.

    SYITG,
    Goose

  • 6-5-(2)4 MANniversary – from Bolt

    6-5-4 countdown: 6/5/24 marked my 4th MANniversary which required a Q by YHC. Boo-boo hyped it up in mumble chatter and the pax did not disappoint, including a DR Bow Wow from Lake Charles who drove in from BR to make the BD!

    Warmorama at the launch pad with Hip Circles (clockwise) x 5 (in cadence)
Hip Circles (counterclockwise) x 5 (in cadence)
Abe SLOWigodas x 10 (in cadence)
Abe Vigodas x 10 (in cadence)
Imperial Walkers x 20 (in cadence)
Mountain Climbers x 10 (in cadence)
, Peter Parker and Parker Peters x 10 (in cadence), SSH x 20. Mosey to JPAX and Alternating leg step-ups (8-count) x 20 (in cadence).
    Grab coupons for 7s:
    6 Manmakers mosey to stairs for bunny hops up with 1 box jump for the balance of the count and bear crawl down the ramp for the rinse/repeat

    Back to back ring of fire x 10 (two different exercises—FRAC!): Merkins (base position – plank), Jump Squats (base position – Al Gore). Somewhere in the mix Boo-boo called for a skip resulting in 5 burpee penalty.

    “Cool down” on your six for protractors for one minute followed by returning coupons and mosey to flag for final MANniversary moves—burpees of course!

    5 minute EMOM of 10 burpees/min, YHC DNF the 50 burpees for the first time in years—the King debilitated rapidly after a three week hiatus!

    4 years ago I needed F3 to keep me from losing my mind in the height of covid lockdown and used the desire to return to physical activity after a five year break as the impetus—what I got in return, many of you can identify with which is why I’m here four years later: the F2 and F3. Thanks to the pax for making me pursue improvement; you are my brothers from different mothers—much love!

  • Hold Steady – from Architect

    PAX gathered, some familiar and unfamiliar faces alike. Warm-ups (approved by Bogey).

    7 mins. Of Heaven (7 Spider-merkins, 14 PP, 21 Leg Raises, 28 Flutter kicks) – Repeat for 7 mins of Glory.

    PAX Partnered up. One ran around the gym while the other held a pose. Repeat 5 times.
    Round 1 – Wall squats
    Round 2 – Plank

    COT commenced with 2 burpees without resistance from the PAX

    Have a great Friday and Safe Weekend.

  • Mixed Bag – from Kenna Brah

    Running,rucking, R2R Training, KOT

  • Organized Chaos – from Kenna Brah

    YHC showed up to a modest gathering of HIMs ready to accelerate their 3GL.

    Warmups
    Arm circles
    Upper Body twist
    Slow Vagoda
    Imperial Walkers
    SSH

    Mosey to JPAS

    Reading off the pre-written poster board, we began the work:

    10 InchWorm Merkins

    Merkin Circuit: 5x each movement, + 1 Merkin each rep
    4ct Plank Jack + 1 Merkin
    L/R Bird Dog + 1 Merkin
    4 Ct Sh Tap + 1 Merkin
    Peter Parker + 1 Merkin
    Parker Peter + 1 Merkin

    AB Work
    10 reps each
    Hello Dolly
    Oh Dolly
    Box Cutter
    L/R single leg wife pleasers
    LBC

    Pickup Coupons
    Complex –
    Sumo Squat/Row/Curl/OHP/Tricep Ext Repeat 10x

    Next

    Pullover/Chest Press/BB Situp/Flutter Kick Repeat 10x

    Mosey to flags and COT

  • 4 “Core”ners – from Jose10k

    3 HIMS took the red pill this morning to better ourselves. The Q was open, so I decided to take it and focus on core today. Warm-ups: The ususal.
    The thang: 4 “Core”ners. We did a series of core exercises at each corner. Penquins, flutter kicks, lbcs, big boy sit ups, and off course wife pleasers (with a fun extra twist). Lt. Dan to the next corner. Finished off with 3 minutes of deep stretches. COT, Moby prayed us out the intentions for Bird and his family with the loss of his first cousin. One other intention: we get to give DarkWing respect starting tomorrow, he’s officially turning 50!

  • Shark Week – from Paradox

    YHC usually has beatdowns loosely formed a few days in advance. But occasionally inspiration will strike so violently that the whole plan needs to be scrapped at the 11th hour. This was the case Monday night when, looking for a “it’s behind me “ hype gif , I came across LLCoolJ from Deep Blue Sea (high on the “influenced my pre teen years movie list” )
    He looked in my eyes through a foggy , heavily cracked IPhone screen and spoke right to me.
    “They need Shark Week Dox , search your heart, they aren’t ready, it’s your job to prepare them”

    All at once, I knew it was true.
    These men are headed to beaches with their families for the next 2-3 months and I can’t send them into battle without conditioning.

    Say no more Mr Cool James, I’ll take care of the rest.

    Duke! Get out of the water and roll the footage!

    9 strong at the Stage.
    We did all the favorite warmers a d YHC was downright scared at the amount of groans coming from attendees of Mondays Wet Tap massacre. Hope they wouldn’t need legs today … headed off to the deep blue sea in an Indian run 3 burp drop.

    Thang 1

    We would stop for 3 rounds of shark related trivia.
    Simple rules.
    Start with 125 reps
    Take 25 off for every correct answer .

    Shark trivia
    1. deep blue sea —-what shark species—-mako
    2. What disease are they trying to cure —-Alzheimer’s
    3. Director of DBS had one previous financial success in 1993. —Cliffhanger
    4. Although he plays the cook , LL cool J character is known as (Blank) and stabs a shark in the eye with a (Blank). —-preacher/crucifix

    Pretty shaky start here when YHC realized know had seen this movie in like 15 years.
    75 merkin fast ball right out the gate.

    General Shark Round
    1.) Smallest shark species—dwarf lantern shark
    2.) The term “jump the shark “ was first used to reference what tv show ? ——Happy Days
    3.) Appearing in the first episode of Saturday night live , this actor played a recurring character , the land shark ——Chevy Chase
    4.) what Hyundai coup got its name from the Spanish word for shark —-Tiburon

    Much better showing here in round 2 as the trivia titans began to stretch their brains. Could have been the acute danger of 125 monkey jumpers signaling a storm of epinephrine but regardless the count was reduced to 25.

    Jaws Category

    1Jaws based on novel of the same name by who ? (Peter Benchley)
    2.) 2 men killed by sharks in this state inspired the book —-NJ
    3.) name the species of shark killed that is mistaken for jaws ? Tiger
    4. The character Quint is a survivor of what famed battleship? USS Indianapolis

    50 Bobbie Hurleys and the legs were primed for Thang 2

    Sharks and Guppies

    Rules
    1 shark starts w 15 burpees – then is free to chase

    Guppies must complete 15 burpees spread out at 3 stations
    If caught before completing the loop they pay 15 merkins

    The shark must pay 5 burpees for every free guppy.

    Round 1 Baby Shark
    Round 2 Grandpa Shark

    YHC made this game specifically with Honeysuckle and Pope in mind. Both with gazelle speed and wolf stamina they were in a good spot to sharpen some iron. Knowing pope would destroy most of us in the first round, the hope was to push near our limits of endurance in round 2.
    This effect was devastating in the Nur round as the quads were screaming and the beekeeper ran most of us down in cold blood, hunting those who had snickered at his coupon crabwalk. Vengeance was his.

    Indian run home looking for Lenny Bruce .

    It wasn’t the end of the world and we didn’t feel fine either.

    Animal from Granpa shark to baby shark.

    Pope had true concerns that he would lose his cardio during summer camp. The collective eye roll from the pax was so severe no eye institute could repair it, not even an advanced one.

    we wished him well in camp and YhC hopes the Animal is the only shirt in his suitcase.

    COT and Goose prayed us out.

    See you in the deep end,

    Dox

  • It’s The Climb – from Paradox

    When the recent news of parish reassignments hit YHC, two things became clear. The first was an inevitable Cardinal tribute beatdown and the second was that I needed some time to think. I needed some distance (about 80miles would do) , some time to reflect …maybe even a nice view…maybe even a lake. And there’s one lake I know of. It’s the one you know too. And as I sat there, parked by that lake, (you know the one), I reflected upon the gift of our own beloved Cardinal to our community. And right there, parked by that very lake, I dedicated this here beatdown to his 5 year ordination anniversary.

    7 men at the Den on a relatively cool Thursday morning for some lake reflection and light calisthenics. The unsuspecting pax to be honored had been lured in with JBL HCs, dreams of chic-fil-a Coffeeteria and mysterious Smooth pressure at the previous nights DC circle. He dutifully fought the fartsack with a spare JBL, a few more regulars rolled in and we were ready to go.

    Duke!! Plug Morgan city in the GPS ! What?! It’s not 80 miles away? Ok ok we’ll edit that in post …roll the footage!!

    Warmup
    The usuals with a warmup mosey for cone deposition and coupon configuration. This is usually where pax are looking for dox booby traps or random garage gym equipment but today all except one had been alerted it was a Cardinal tribute. They trudged onward anyway , into a nest of heavy coupons and gratitude.

    THA THANG

    YHC announced that we would celebrate Cardinals many gifts in circuit and musical form .

    Song

    The Announcement

    When yHC first spoke with Cardinal about his new Morgan City parish we mostly planned an AO for the nearby LakeEnd park. It was amidst these jokes I saw the lake, and the miles, and the parking. Only one song could carry the weight of this kind of announcement

    Dean Summerwind
    “Parked by the Lake
    Merkin – Parked
    Side Reach – Lake
    MC – Santa Fe

    That one never gets old.

    Next the Challenge

    YHC has always been amazed at the sheer volume of Cardinals schedule. Mass, family dinners, meetings, plannimg schizms, whoop surveys, biscuit tastings, coffee roasters fine things club…and that’s just a regular Monday.
    so an attempt was made to recreate and bring the pax along for the challenge.

    Start in front of CC stairs
    25 merkins (wake up)
    Coupon Crab Walk to stairs (walk to coffee pot)
    Confession/Mass/confession –
    – 10 Thrusters – 10 curls- 10 Thrusters
    High knee waves to cone (as a local celebrity
    Run remaining civic center (late for a meeting) High knees waves back
    Then Repeat above …because you have another mass at 10M mass
    Coupon lunge backwards
    25 merkins

    The pax had all accepted various non priest vocations by the second serving of thrusters and Honeysuckle even assisted YHCs theme by pretending to display weakness at Coupon Crabwalks, prompting YHC to extend help to a “struggling parishioner” and swap everyone to coupon lunges walks. It’s ok HS , those Shakira hips don’t lie but they’re just too powerful.

    Next we honored Cardinals uncanny ability to answer trivia with burpees on the line.
    Early in YHCs Q career I selected the Hannah Montana movie album with hopes of cardio torture. Cardinal heard 2 microseconds of the beat, guessed the song, the year released AND the album saving the pax around 30 burpees. F3 Thib scholars still teach it to their students as a historical landmark of leadership.

    Song:

    Its the Climb – Miley Cyrus
    SSH/ Burpees from Mountain to Climb

    Another round of the Mass circuit and them coups were getting heavy.

    Finally, and more sincerely YHC wanted to recognize Cardinals willingness to allow God to direct his life , pour out his grace and provide support for many of his F3 and community brothers through trying times and tribulations.

    Song :
    Lord of Hosts – Shane and Shane
    Ring of Fire – Merkins – Burpees
    We did a lot. The vision was blurry.

    COT
    Rugby to Cardinal
    and Popeye prayed us out

    **special shout out to a few Cardinal partners in crime who provided “Cardinals greatest hits: Seal, Nelly and beyond”

    Words of a Feather:

    In the fall of 2021 YHC walked onto a gloomy stage with a financial advisor and a theologian . Sounds like a bad doctor joke with a bartender punchline right?
    It was actually YHCs first beatdown and I remember impressions of each man well. Goose, responsible for the EH at dinner the night before, had firmly planted himself in YHCs brain as “just my kind of crazy person”but the intensity level was palpable in his gaze so I looked onward. His wife had informed me it was “calisthenics and running” so why did it look more like a Cobra Kai seminar? “ Ok don’t panic” I told myself. , what about the other guy? Oh , Enron? He looked like a man who would crush a beer can between his forearm and bicep first and ask questions later. Clearly he was the enforcer of the bunch and I hoped my 318 cred would last for atleast 45 minutes. I was beginning to unravel this odd corporate structure, simultaneously back peddling to the car and trying to decide which one would ask me for the first monthly installment when a third man appeared. His smile was equal parts kind and welcoming and as he strolled in I felt an overwhelming sense of safety. They both addressed him as Cardinal. He replied with appropriate quips for each and we got started.
    As we celebrate Cardinals 5th year as a priest it’s this very gift that I want to highlight the most, providing hope. For me that day it was just hope to survive chubbawampas hit single. But for the many people in this community he has impacted it’s a much greater Hope.

    Hope restored as he administers sacraments ,Hope reminded in skilled homilies and Hope redeemed in spiritual direction.

    All these, and much more he provides as an instrument of Gods grace and as an example of great trust.

    Cardinal, you are a gift to our F3 brotherhood. We are grateful for you and look forward to supporting you in the next adventure.

    And just know that when you’re ready , we’ll all be parked out there…sitting right by that lake…you know the one.

    SYITG ,
    Dox