F3 New Orleans

Tag: JV

  • Never have I ever (Yes I have!) – from Russo

    Disclaimer: yes, most of this was written well ahead of time, Zoolander, and copied and pasted, edited, and spellchecked (I think).

    30 degrees greeted a Pax of 13 this morning, perfect sunrise, a little chilly from the remnants of rain.

    Too cold to be called a Warmup (all IC, between 10 and 25x)
    – Sealjacks
    – Good mornings
    – High knees
    – Cherry pickers
    – Grass grabbers
    – Self love
    – Imperial walkers

    Thangs before the Thang
    (1) Mosey down Girod, stopping every block or so for some Ro-Cham-Burpee (10 rounds of rock, paper, scissors, the winner performs merkins, the loser burpees)

    Things we learned:
    – Zoolander and Jose were “pretty even” through 2 rounds
    – Guinea Pig had incredible fortune until he ran into the buzzsaw of YHC’s scissors
    – The ground is cold without gloves

    (2) Card sharks (Complete exercises based on card count, next round guess higher or lower, a correct guess multiplies the rep 2x, incorrect 3x)
    – Crab cakes
    – Scissor kicks
    – Peter Parker’s
    – Big boi situps
    – Plank jacks
    – American hammers
    – Murder bunnies
    – Monkey humpers

    Things we learned:
    – Murder bunnies are a favorite of YHC
    – The deck was most certainly not stacked to finish on an Ace (with a 3x multiplier)
    – Guinea Pig played great strategy on the 10
    – Jose redeemed himself with higher/lower

    Thang

    YHC is not what one would call creative. Completely left-brained, my world revolves around number and order and sequence. I struggle to keep beatdowns fresh. Most of my planning is either “that’s a good idea, let’s modify that” or “what’s a game I’ve played that can be transformed into a beatdown?” The latter held true for a spirited and, at times, confusing, game of:

    Never have I ever (Q calls out an action, If you’ve done said action, move to one side. If not, move to the other. Exercise and rep count will vary based on what side you’re on)

    Actions (“Yes” first exercise listed, “No”second one listed, most of them look right, there was some modification)

    (1) Q’ed the Mothership – 10 merkins, 5 burpees

    (2) Fartsacked a Q – 10 burpees, 10 merkins

    (3) Intentionally run a red light – 10 burpees, 15 squats

    (4) Picked up the 6 – 3 calf raises, 15 SMCs

    (5) Fallen asleep at work – 25 hallelujah squats, 5 Peter Parker’s

    (6) Called a partner the wrong name – 10 donkey kicks, 5 arm circles

    (7) Cut my own or someone else’s hair – 10 merkins, 20 SSH

    (8) Dated a friend’s ex – lap around Granny’s, 5 merkins

    (9) Stopped to help some with roadside car trouble – 5 jump squats, 25 Apollo Ohnos

    (10) Let someone cut in line in front of me – 10 mountain climbers, 10 burpees

    (11) Played wordle – bear crawl, mosey

    (12) Slept in my car – 20 star jumps, 10 arm circles

    (13) Hit a parked car – 20 groiners, 5 merkins

    (14) Sent an inappropriate text or message to the wrong person – 5 burpees, 5 merkins

    (15) Been frisked or in a police car – 30 squats, 10 cherry pickers

    (16) Removed an inappropriate amount of clothes in public – 10 burpees, 1 burpee

    Things we learned:
    – Too many lawyers in the Pax. We had to define “partner”, “hit”, “date”, “mothership”, “intentional”, as well as clarify what is meant by “inappropriate” and “slept”
    – Even after 16 rounds, some of us aren’t really sure which side to go to
    – There were at least two people who found themselves on the side I didn’t expect them to be on (Names redacted, let the speculation commence)
    – Other things that should not be broadcast here to protect the innocent
    – Best line of the Thang (paraphrased): I paid for that 20 years ago and now Russo is making me pay for it again.

    After enough absolution, Pax moseyed back to the flag in a modified Indian run where the lead runner peels off and heads to the back.

    COT, Name-o-Rama, announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    Announcements
    – HogsBreath and Pass Interference are planting the Slidell flag on Monday at 5:30!
    – Hammer is pulling together a fundraiser for the Nehemiah Project in mid-March. I’ll let him provide more details on this worthy cause.
    – There were multiple prayer requests, including friends and family of Akbar, Bubba, Bird, and Jose, so a focus of our prayer was on mental/physical health and God’s gifts of healing, comfort, mercy, and peace.

    One final word on something Bubba brought up:

    There is an awful lot we shoulder every day: work, family, commitments, temptation, life’s difficulties, you name it. We may tend to bottle up stress or pressure until we just can’t take it anymore.

    Most of us have found F3 to be a release of some of that pressure. We’ve stumbled upon a group that, despite our imperfections, will absolutely stand tall in the face of adversity and stand with our brothers. I thank God every day for this group, and each of the men that have helped to shape me into a better human being. You are all leading by example and my prayer is that we do that for everyone around us.

    Maybe you pick up the 6 more, or reach out to ask how something went for someone this week. Maybe you share your Q source, and then make sure it gets read. Maybe you spend a couple hours to drop everything and help someone move. There are countless other examples that I hope we have and can point to when things get tough. There are too many other examples for me to list.

    If anyone is struggling, reach out. My ear is always ready to be bent. SYITG 🤛🏼

  • What’s the Ladder with you? – from Russo

    Not-quite-as-cold-as-it-has-been 45 degrees this morning, slight drizzle that Steve lamented was relenting. 4 HIM tackled the ladders Granny set up this morning.

    Things we learned this morning: Rummel has/had some fantastic lunch options, none better than daily square pizza and bi-weekly chicken parm on Thursdays. Raider Pride! This statement was confirmed by all 2 Raiders present, and before Pik could disagree and let the Metairie scum know how much better Jesuit fare is. There were no Crusaders, Cavaliers, Purple Knights, Eagles, or Tigers present to object, so by unanimous consent, Rummel is the undisputed king of lunchtime for the old school Catholic league. Print the shirts!

    Warmup (all IC)
    22 SSH
    22 cherry pickers
    11 grass grabbers
    11 good mornings
    11 imperial walkers

    Thang
    Ladders
    Rounds 1 and 2 (rep count 1 to 7, then rep count 7 to 1 next round)
    7 and 1 Freak nastys
    6 and 2 Step ups (2 is 1)
    5 and 2 Derkins
    4 and 4 Bulgarian split squats
    3 and 5 Shoulder taps
    2 and 6 Urkins
    1 and 7 Hip slappers

    Rounds 3 through 9 (start with the count below, then next round, move the 1 rep “up” to the next exercise, replace first exercise with 7) – rinse and repeat until each exercise completes 28 reps
    7 Burpees
    6 Deep squats
    5 Merkins
    4 Nutcrackers (2 is 1)
    3 BB sit-ups
    2 Mountain climbers
    1 Star jump

    Ladders 10 through 12 – Pax killed the planned ladders, so we added exercises and reps. In addition to the above, we worked through 8 monkey humpers, 9 groiners, and 10 Supermans.

    Ladders 13 and 14
    7 and 1 Hello Dollys
    6 and 2 LBCs
    5 and 3 American hammers
    4 and 4 LMCs
    3 and 5 Scissor kicks
    2 and 6 Leg raises
    1 and 7 Dr. W (a terrible, awful, no good exercise to cadence by the way)

    Certain rounds got a bonus mosey between them to break up the monotony and give us a chance to mumblechatter.

    After ladders, Pax climbed up the pilot house, 2 calf raises each step.

    COT, name-o-rama, announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    Reminders included RCR, Krazy Ivan 2/3 @8, and sign up to Q!

    Another superstar group this morning, thanks for letting me lead.

    SYITG

  • Deck of Death Part IV: A New Hope – from Russo

    36 degrees greeted a Pax of 6 at Granny’s for the return of the deck of death: version 2022.1. This upgrade featured the “Animal activity pack”, with crowd favorites Monkey Humpers (you’re welcome Hogs Breath), Crab Cakes (just for you Jose!), Donkey Kicks, and Crunchy Frogs.

    Warmup (all IC, varying reps, like a locker combination: to your RIGHT!)

    -Seal jacks
    -Cherry pickers
    -Imperial walkers
    -Grass grabbers
    -Self love
    -High knees

    Thang

    Bench work with 20 freak nastys and 20 step ups, followed by 10 of both, and then 5 more.

    After a quick mosey, Pax knocked out the Deck of Death (exercise and count based on value and suit of the card turned over from a standard deck of playing cards). YHC likes to split the deck into 4 groups to vary up the exercises, with some moseying before, during, and after.

    Hearts – Monkey Humpers, Jump squats, SMCs, Nut Crackers
    Diamonds – Diamond Merkins, Merkins, Peter Parkers, Shoulder Tap Merkins
    Clubs – LBCs, Leg Raises, Crunchy Frogs, American Hammers
    Spades – Crab Cakes, Donkey Kicks, Gas Pumps, Angels in the Outfield

    Mary
    With about 5 minutes left, Pax completed some calf raises up the pilot house, 2 each step, a minute of plank, and a final 10 merkins.

    COT, Name-o-Rama, announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    Note the Crazy Ivan is coming up on 2/3 and HogsBreath and Pass interference are working on a Slidell AO. Keep checking Slack for more info.

    Thank you all again for joining, letting me lead you all. As always, really enjoyed the mumble chatter.

    And finally, the vote count, subject to independent verification next week, was 11 A’s and 7 T’s. And in case you’re wondering, I vote T.

    SYITG

  • Seven…seven…7…seven…7….(holds up seven fingers) 7! – from Russo

    55 degrees and chilly drizzle greeted Super Ants JV and YHC this morning for a few rounds of 7s. Plenty of Raider Pride to go around.

    Warmup (primarily IC, 15 to 20x each)
    – SSHs
    – Arm circles
    – Hillbillies
    – Toe touches
    – Cherry pickers
    – Mosey 400 yards-ish around the warehouse

    Thang
    7 was again the magic number, a biblically perfect number of reps for the 7th day of the month.

    Multiple rounds of 7 alternating exercise, with a different movement to get us from column to column.

    7 merkins
    Nutcrackers between the 7 columns
    7 LBCs (Round performed 2x)

    7 hip slappers (2 is 1)
    Bear crawl between the 7 columns
    7 gas pumps (Round performed 2x)

    7 plank jacks
    Reverse lunges between the 7 columns
    7 monkey humpers

    7 shoulder tap merkins
    Hallelujah squats between the 7 columns
    7 Hello Dollie’s

    Between each round, we moseyed around Granny’s, each round a longer mosey than the previous. YHC was often distracted by the twinkly lights for Christmas.

    After round 6, we wrapped up with a customary trip up and around the pilot house as a modified round 7 for the completest.

    COT, Name-o-Rama, Announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    T claps to my partner in crime JV for keeping me focused and entertained.

  • Nothing but THANKS – from Russo

    YHC is a big fan of finding little things to be thankful for every day. Something new or different. Something unexpected. Something unique. Anything to keep me plugged into how blessed we are.

    Blessings like a bathroom at Grandma’s house. Like a cool, crisp 43 degree morning. Like lunch dates with potential love interests. Like 7 HIM sharing a common experience and making themselves better. Like Zoolander’s encyclopedic knowledge of early-to-mid 90s Halloween and witchcraft movies.

    Giving thanks was the name of the game today at granny’s.

    Warmup (all 10 to 20 IC)
    – Seal jacks
    – Grass grabbers
    – Torso twists
    – Imperial walkers
    – Arm circles
    – Cherry pickers

    Thang

    Mosey around the lakefront, where we stopped intermittently to give THANKS: each exercise starting with the proper letter. T claps to Cowbell for picking up on the pattern quickest (I think).

    T. T merkins (10)
    H. Hallelujah squats (15)
    A. Apollo ohno’s (10: 2 is 1)
    N. Not-so-lazy boys (10)
    K. Knuckle merkins (10)
    S. SMC’s (10)

    T. Traveler merkins (10 in a clockwise pattern)
    H. Hip slappers (20: 1 is 1)
    A. American Hammers (25: 2 is1)
    N. Freak Nastys (15)
    K. Kraken Burpee (5) – T claps to Steve for correctly guessing what was coming.
    S. Step ups (20: 1 is 1)

    T. Twinkle toes (20: 2 is 1)
    H. Hand release merkins (10)
    A. Alligator merkins (10)
    N. Nutcrackers (10 IC)
    K. Knuckle merkins (10) – Respect to JV and Slots (and maybe others) knocking them out on the concrete without gloves
    S. Scissor kicks (20: 2 is 1) – or maybe it was flutter kicks, I can’t keep them straight.

    The mosey back ended with one minute to spare, so Pax planked until the clock hit 0.

    COT, Name-o-Rama, announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    Here’s where I give thanks, not only this week, but every day for this group of (and all) HIM. Getting up before 5 to push harder with the vague goal of making ourselves better, however we want to define it, is never an easy decision, but it’s often the right one. I hope we continue to be able to take some time to give thanks for what God has blessed us with.

    Like breath in our lungs to do Hallelujah squats in a circle in the middle of Girod street, like a cult worship, without getting hauled away to jail to “sleep it off.”

    SYITG

  • A Bonnie Blair By Any Other Name Still Sucks – from Zoolander

    I know it says Zoolander was the Q for this one, but that’s only because YHC’s name isn’t on the dropdown menu yet. And, it was ultimately Zoo’s idea to get the fellas from down the bayou to Q a November Lakefront beatdown, and we couldn’t be more grateful!

    YHC showed up in the Goosemobile with four men and two boys who’ve been looking forward to this for weeks. It’s become very clear to me over the years that God has wired men in such a way that the more we suffer together, the more we come to care deeply about each other’s well being, regardless of differences in background, lifestyle, (number of kids), etc. So, it was easy to jump at the opportunity to travel north and lead a beatdown out of gratitude for the men who have allowed me to suffer with them and who first shared the gift of F3 with me. Now, the cycle is continuing down in Thibodaux with a growing PAX!

    Disclaimer was stated for the benefit of an FNG (Welcome, Crock Pot!). Warmups consisted of IC: SSH, Windmills, Imperial Walkers, Arm Circles, Cherry Pickers, Self Love, High Knees, and Butt Kicks, followed by a mosey to Noah’s Ark.

    YHC revealed an F3 Workout Deck, and three cards were pulled and listed exercises completed with a promise of more random suffering to come. This was followed by partner BLIMPS, but with a bit of a twist. Grundy’s late arrival provided an opportunity to reminisce back to YHC’s first beatown, whcih was Q’d by Grundy. It included Sister Mary Catherine’s in the warmup, which totally burned out my legs before we even got to Noah’s Ark. A fitting memory to share before introducing these BLIMPS:

    Thang 1:
    Partner 1 ran around Noah’s Ark, while Partner 2 huffed and puffed his way through their shared total of:
    50 Bonnie Blairs (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Lunge Jumps (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Iron Mikes (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Merkins,
    50 Plank Jacks,
    50 Sister Mary Catherine’s (SMC’s)

    Thang 2:
    Moseyed once again, stopping to complete exercises from three more cards from the deck, then lining up along the wall for two version of a newly minted “Indian Inchworm Wall Crawl”. The first version consisted of all PAX in dip position on the wall moving to the right and completing a dip with every “step” while the man in the rear of the line crab walked to the front. After a number of traffic jams and Bushwacker grumbles, the last of the PAX had crabbed their way to the front, so it was time to turn around and go the other way. Pax assumed the irkin position on the wall and moved to the right, completing an irkin with every “step”. The rearmost PAX bear crawled their way to the front of the line this time, so things moved a little more quickly.

    Thang 3:
    Another short mosey brought us to a grassy area big enough for the highly anticipated Tunnel of Love. Ironically, Zoolander had just shared his gratitude that YHC hadn’t included this exercise since it was a memorable highlight from my VQ a few years back. So, it was with a special joy that I announced that all PAX would be snuggling up shoulder to shoulder in plank position while the rearmost PAX in the line army crawled through Tunnel of Love. Bushwacker’s encouraging “love whacks” kept the line moving while the plankers’ shoulders burned and threatened to give out.

    Hope then rose in the hearts of many as we lined up for what would be a wildly chaotic Indian run back to the flag with many PAX digging deep, knowing that this would ultimately be the last time they’d have to push. But, YHC knew what lurked amongst the cards in the deck, and after two relatively harmless pulls to fill the small amount of time left before 7:30, a third and final pull was offered to the FNG. It was the new guy, at 7:29, who managed to pull the 400 meter sprint card, arguably the worst card in the deck. So, despite the shared astonishment and disbelief, the beatdown ended with 25 men sprinting toward an inhabited car and then back to the flag, all residual energy and will to live good and drained.

    COT, announcements, and prayer by Enron of F3 Thibodaux.

    Coffeeteria offered time to catch up and enjoy the beautiful weather before the long ride home to Thibodaux. All PAX in the Goosemobile shared their gratitude for the opportunity to experience F3 on that level and for the men who were willing to suffer with us as we continue to strive to get better at doing hard things. It was a great gift to get to spend such high quality time with you guys this morning, and I very much look forward to seeing you in the gloom (wherever that gloom might be)!

  • Fall Back – from Steve

    Talk about a dark warmorama. About the only definable figure I could make out was, well nobody, really, since Shooter wasn’t there. Of course I knew Jose was present from the early morning grumbling, but the rest of the crew were shrouded in mystery. Given such circumstances, YHC delivered a clear disclaimer in case there were any FNGs (turned out there were two), and we got things rolling.

    Started off with the usual – good mornings, windmills, torso twists, arm circles, IW’s, Hillbillies, SSHs, High Knees – mostly at 10x IC, but a 15 and a 30 crept in there. I like to say those instances are “to keep the pax on their toes,” but of course the pax is smarter than that – they know it’s just early morning brain fog.

    We hadn’t moseyed to the playground in a while, so that was on the menu today, stopping at each intersection for a set of 10x deconstructed burpees. Zoolander’s No-Booze-November had hit a snag the night before (a snag by the name of Woodford Reserve), and so my originally planned set of x20 burpees seemed cruel as he had, not but 5 minutes before this point, requested “no burpees, please.” So we deconstructed instead, which would mean 10x squats, 10x groiners, 10x merkins, and 10x jump squats. Knocked those out at the three intersections and then hit a fourth one when we reached the playground.

    Then it was time for one of my lakefront standards, a partner routine where P1 wall sits and performs overhead air presses while P2 hits three stations: 10 t-merkins, 10 jump squats, 10 big boys. Three rounds of that and it was on to neighboring grass patch for a few games.

    That’s right, games. Let it not be said (Toto) that I do not include any fun in my beatdowns! First up was a game called When Animals Attack, which features one pax (it) bear crawling to tag any of the other guys, who are all crab walking. Any one who is tagged then performs 5 burpees and immediately joins in as a bear, to help tag the rest of the crew. I had initially envisioned a rabid, growling Tanked Up tearing through that patch of grass, but alas, when the sun finally rose this morning and it was clear who was standing before me, there was no Tank to be found. Grundy was the next best choice, so he became the first bear. Now, whoever invented this game clearly did not know the Northshore region’s distaste for crab walking because when the game finally began, the crabs all just sat in place waiting to be tagged. Some even moved closer to the bear! It seemed unanimous – the guys would rather do their 5 burpees and half-heartedly attempt to tag others than crab walk five steps. The next round was hardly better than the first, with Zoolander and his stomach of steel as the bear, and so we moved on to another game: Duck Jousting.

    To say duck jousting was more successful might be a stretch, but it was certainly more entertaining. In this game, it’s every man for himself. You get in a low duck walk position with your arms across your chest, and hobble over to the nearest pax to try and topple him without the use of your hands. Once you’ve been knocked over, you start high kneeing until the game ends.

    Though this was totally a Mathlete type of game, a surprise attack by Zoolander knocked him out early on. It came down to Jose, Swole, and Zoo. Swole attempted a Switzerland type of strategy, where he simply sat (or squatted) off to the side and awaited the victor between Jose and Zoo. But this proved faulty when Zoo took him down by surprise. By this point, our two gladiators had entirely abandoned the rule of duck walking (well, let’s be fair, Zoolander was never actually duck walking from the start). Even with an assist from Bird, Zoo was unable to take down Jose, but one final assault sent both men to the ground in a tie.

    Time to head back, so we formed two lines and Bataan Death Marched back to the flag. Once back, we did some single leg squats to the sea wall while Turbo graciously picked up the six. Quick Mary and time for COT. Welcome FNG’s Slater and Woody, and t-claps for hanging in there. Hope to see you guys back out soon. (And a personal thanks to our FNG’s for forcing me to write a backblast after months of negligence.) Hammer prayed us out and off to Book and the Bean for coffeteria. Appreciate the opportunity to lead you men, SYITG.

  • The Addams family – from Shooter

    YHC planned a coupon workout for this Gloom that would see the likes of 5 PAX.. Thank you to Hogsbreath for today’s title, but know gentlemen I have selected with great thought your Addams family names..

    We started off with the warmup consisting of 10IC, some 15IC as well as 20IC mixture of Grass grabbers, Torso twists, SSH, Butt kicks, Imperial walkers, Hillbillies and Cherry Pickers..

    Our cast members of the day included Hogsbeath (Gomez).. The Stache is golden and Bushwacker is sure to be jealous of how you rock it.. Then there is Akbar (Uncle Fester) wide eyed and refreshed returning from a trip with the family to VA.. Followed by JV (Pugsley) mostly for being the young chap at this mornings AO, but also seems like an individual who might have aggravated a sibling a time or two in his past… Next we have Waterpik (Cousin ITT), now I know there may be some confusion on this one, so let me explain. Last Thursday at the Scramble YHC had noticed Waterpik had not seen the barber in awhile, so much so that at the Mothership Saturday YHC noticed right away that his ears had been pulled back from a trim.. Now it is only fitting that I name myself (Lurch) simply because it was my duty to lead these men this morning..

    Workout consisted of coupon Work starting out on the court and at the playground. Each PAX performed Squat thrusters while all did 8 pull-ups. Took to the street carrying coupons along the way alternating sprints, shuffles, back pedals and skips as we made our journey towards the lakefront stopping at each stop sign for called exercise. PAX without coupon did called core work while the PAX with coupon did stated rep count of called exercise. Coupon work consisted of shoulder presses, Block burpees, Kettle swings, One arm alternating kettle swings (which Gomez demonstrated perfectly in rhythm), Curls and cross arm block squats.. I realize there is another name but cannot think of it at the moment..Core work was plank, chillcut plank, Little Manny crunches, leg lifts, hello Dollies and flutter kicks..

    Arrived back right on time for count, name and COT…

    Appreciate the lead and follow gentlemen and until the next Gloom 👍🏼👊🏼✌🏼!!!

  • O say it ain’t so coach “0”!! – from Shooter

    With chatter of the recent resignation of Coach “0” Jose 10k entertained the PAX with the grumble mumble impersonation on this brisk Gloom.. If teaching doesn’t work out Jose 10k you have a straight path to stand up with the skills demonstrated at Granny’s.. You play the role with such accurate mumbles and grumbles… It appears the PAX has another committed brethren in JV and we look forward to the next step of getting you that VQ in the near future.. 6 PAX in all committed to the red pill 💊 and I hope the YHC didn’t disappoint.. Glad to have Cowbell back out packing the muscle back on after completing his marathon last week.. No more waving as he would often pass the PAX while training for his endeavor…

    All 10IC Grass grabbers, Windmills, Cherry Pickers, self love, Hillbillies, SSH, and Butt kicks,

    Moseyed to the tunnel for 100,200,300
    P1 completed called exercises while P2 utilized Granny’s steepest elevation in proximity for some cardio.
    RD1 P1Burpees P2 Moseyed down to the flat returning backwards up the ramp.. F/J
    RD2 P2 Air squats ( one day YHC will be able to execute the incredible form illustrated by Waterpik) P2 bear crawled out 20 count then returned with the bunny hop.. F/J
    RD3 P1 LBCs P2 Moseyed down and sprinted back up. F/J

    PAX then moseyed to the bus stop. 20 jump overs OYO, 10 donkey kickoffs, 10 either side half jump overs and back to 10 donkey kickoffs.T 👏🏼 to Russo for great extension at the top of the donkey kickoffs.. Rerurned to the flag wrapping up with 20IC Cowbell Flutters and Hello Dollies…

    Appreciate the post gentlemen and following my lead.. Until the next Gloom 👍🏼👊🏼✌🏼!!