F3 New Orleans

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  • American History F – from America’s Best

    HC arrived this morning to find a Den with no way in, as our lot had been barricaded. What a way to start a manniversary.
    First they came for our lion, and we did not speak out. Then they came for our parking lot, and we did not speak out. Not sure what comes next, but I think the general idea is to just ignore it.

    Warmarama began one minute late, mainly due to the PAX needing to inspect buckets of concrete and to check if pull-ups could be done from tent poles.

    SSH
    Windmills
    Imperial Walkers
    Willie Mays Hayes
    Mountain Climbers
    Arm circles of varying speeds
    Cherry Pickers

    F3 changes a man, in big ways and in small ways. But also in medium ways. For example, I will give you an example, through this illustration, vis-à-vis, case-in-point: I don’t listen to music in the same way anymore— now every time I hear a song, it’s immediately “could this be used in a beatdown?” So while the skeleton of today’s beatdown would be trivia, it’s disgusting sinew and adipose and entrails would be the best found songs of the year. And I guess the skin would be, like, the locations represented by our stops. Or something. Let’s just get on with it, ok?

    Moseying to the Aldi parking lot, we were met again with the barricades. While most of the PAX went around, Paradox apparently sensed the beatdown was heading to Germany, and leapt the wall like an East German gazelle in a terrible metaphor.

    The First Question was read, and the PAX contemplated the answer while squatting and Bobby Hurley-ing to An Arrow in the Wall by Death Cab For Cutie. The song was quickly and relentlessly abused as an obscure, ancient dirge from YHC’s past. (In reality, it was actually released less than a year ago, and while it was never “nominated for an Emmy” it has been met with critical success. But I’ll leave that alone; whatever is the opposite of “preaching to the choir” seems to be what I am doing here…)

    The correct answer to Q1 was (a very controversial) “omelette.” Nobody guessed correctly (likely another alternate-reality-induced schism), so we did (8×5) 40 Carolina Dry Docks (a hint to the next location)

    Next stop, next question. Maneater identified the place as NC. Then the PAX held 6” and Wheezied with every “gonna.” While the song began as a DMB classic, we were quickly Rick-Rolled for 4 minutes.
    The answer to question #2 was “cropdust” and Popeye and Paradox easily sniffed this one out. Yankee Jeaux was very proud of his guess, and legend has it he is still insisting that YHC also coined the term “douchebag.”
    The PAX was penalized with only (6×5) 30 gas pumpers.

    3rd stop around the world was Hawaii. The PAX nailed the location, then did an exercise known (by YHC at least) as the Makhtar N’J-Rod while Eric Clapton narrated.
    YHC’s favorite 90s band (who is still making music Today) was correctly answered only by Yankee Jeaux. Popeye’s guess of “Puddle of Mudd” may be the meanest thing anyone has ever said to me.
    (7×5) 35 BBS was the penalty

    Location #4 was Ohio. And in spite of the smell from the dumpsters, it was not identified— our penalty would be doubled.
    We monkey-humped to “Let me be your Hog.” Burpees on some trigger words, but none of them occurred during the full 17 seconds of this song.
    The urinal of choice is “lowest/shortest” which 5 PAX answered correctly.
    Popeye’s guess of “fullest” wins Very Best Wrong Answer.
    (3x5x2(penalty)) = 30 BBS

    Next stop was VA- again an easy one. And it was time to listen to that other favorite band, whilst pondering the next question and doing a burpee for each “ever” or “never.” Here’s some trivia for you: “ever” and “never” are heard only 13 times in Oasis’ “Live Forever.” However, we were again quickly rolled into Rick. And that dude says “never” like 40 times.
    The F-4, the greatest fighter-bomber ever built, was correctly identified only by Maneater.
    35 Burpees were the penalty.

    The final song was played, and the PAX were instructed to right-foot lunge on each “pizza” and left-foot lunge on each “taco.” And what to do in-between? Turns out, it doesn’t matter. “It’s the Combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell.”

    A weary (from all the “Sweatin’ to the Weirdies”) and downtrodden (from all the not-knowing) PAX assembled back at the flag, still pondering the answer to question #6.
    Several horrible guesses were defended. The answer?
    Will be revealed in a future beatdown.

    Until then, look for Death Cab for Cuties’ upcoming single “A Very Controversial Omelette”

    COT and Maneater prayed us out.

    SYITG,

    AB

  • Afternoon Delight – 7-10-2024 – from Almonaster

    11’s and BLIMP’s!

    PAX:

    – Stork
    – Strings
    – Doc Oc
    – Couch
    – almonaster
    – Bulleseye for “Coffee!”

    Warmup:

    SSH – 20 IC
    Stretch
    Arm Circles -10 IC
    Reverse Arm Circles – 10 IC
    Imperial Walkers – 10 IC
    The Morpheus – 10 IC
    Grass Grabbers – 10 IC
    Windmills – 10 IC
    Mountain Climbers – 10 IC

    The Thang:

    We went to the Levee to take in the sites at the River.

    11’s
    – Start at the bottom with one Merkin and at the top with 10 Wife Pleasers. Inverse each way until opposite, making for 55 reps of each.

    Mosey to the Statue

    Mary
    – Flutter Kicks – 20 IC
    – Vkadimir Douillies – 20 IC

    Mosey to Oak Alley

    BLIMP’s – Cumulative down Oak Alley
    – 5 Burpees
    – 10 Lunges – 2 is 1
    – 15 Imperial Walkers
    – 20 Merkins
    – 25 Plank Jacks
    – 30 Squats

    Back to Flag

    Birthdays
    Anniversaries
    Announcements
    Intentions
    Prayer

    Thanks for the opportunity to lead

  • 1776 workout – from Hogs Breath

    Yhc arrive at the 007. Quickly realizing that sometimes you are the soul warrior out on a beat down.

    So I began a self-improvement quest, a quick warm-up, nothing special toy solders, cherry pickers, etc.

    Then a half a mile run. Continuing with the patriotic theme. I began 17 exercises with 21 reps of each exercise (that I stole from Hookie’s beatdown).

    Merkins
    Overhead claps
    LBC
    Dips
    Moroccan Night Clubs
    Leg Scissors
    Step ups
    Squats
    American Hammers
    Mountain Climbers
    Shoulder Taps
    Plank Jacks
    High Knees
    Lunges
    SSH
    Superman with Lat pull downs
    Big Boi Sit ups

    Once I completed that another half mile run.

  • Blame Zoo – from Steve

    That was the refrain of the day after YHC called out, “Let’s get started,” and was met with a collective groan. Look, YHC isn’t even in the top 3 of the toughest Northshore Q’s (think Grundy, Hammer, hell, even Pickaxe/Chainsaw could give me a run for my money). Also, just personal philosophy here, but YHC believes we don’t need to be gutting it out every day during the week. Sometimes a simple four corners with some merkins and squats will suffice. Especially in this heat.

    However…

    There were burpees and Sister Mary’s to contend with if you happen to be a Spartaner participating in Zoo’s ISI challenge. And these gems (which otherwise would never have found their way into today’s beatdown, obviously) would unfortunately have to be passed along to the pax.

    The usual warmorama saw a little excitement when BBQ dared to poke the bear during torso twists, saying, “Now THAT is how you count torso twists. Some guys – not naming names (ahem, Jose 10k), just rush through it.”

    That was all it took – you could see the fire light in Jose’s eyes: “Oh, wait – hold up – you wanna talk cadence counting with me, BBQ?!?” The mocking began and eventually devolved into another gesture of self-love (not the warmorama kind) directed at BBQ. BBQ took his licks before YHC moved it along – nothing to see here.

    20x burpees, OYO. (“Zoo’s fault, not mine.”)

    Mosey over to the back of the Justice Center for some leg work:

    Round 1:
    20x squats
    20x lunge pulse left leg (SMK’s if needed)
    20x lunge pulse right leg (SMK’s if needed)
    20x mountain climbers (2:1)

    High knees run to the stairs, 5x calf raises up each step, mosey perimeter back to start.

    10x burpees to reset round (Again, blame Zoo.)

    Round 2:
    20x alt leg lunges
    20x monkey humpers IC (timed perfectly for a courthouse employee who made a very wide berth around us, though YHC had a hard time reading her side-eye of Moby, which seemed to be a mixture of lewd desire and also revulsion.)
    20x Apollo Ohno’s
    20x plank jacks

    High knees, calf raises, back to start. 10x burpees

    Round 3:
    20x Bobby Hurley’s
    20x star jumps
    20x smurf jacks
    20x Peter Parker’s

    And more high knees, calf raises, burpees.

    Amidst all the leg work we got to hear about Legal’s son’s pilgrimage on the Camino de Santiago, all 700+ km of it over the course of 39 days. Apparently, it was “life changing.” But then again, Legal says that to his son, everything falls into one of three categories: awesome, incredible, life-changing. Ahh the sunny optimism of youth. There was none of that to be found here at the Gipper – sunny optimism or youth – as we listened to Moby grunting and muttering f-bombs (presumably directed at YHC).

    Over to the benches for a quick set of 11’s: Freak Nasties, up to the top of the stairs, to merkins. Halfway thru we modified to Moby-style (no running), which was more brutal but helped with timing.

    Back to the flag in time for a quick one minute plank (again, Zoo’s fault), and then COT where Einstein prayed us out, with thanks and healthy wishes for the Pax’s new grandchildren (congrats BBQ and Einstein!). As always, it was a pleasure to be amongst the fine (and refined) gentlemen of Covington – seriously, you guys are a great crew. Every time I make it out there, it motivates me to come more often.

  • First Q With No Hate! – a Beatdown for the Ages – from Charmin

    Birthday Q

    19 x SSH (2 count)
    10 x Grass Grabbers
    10 x Slow Vagodas

    Arm Circles x30
    Forward
    Backward
    Seal Claps
    Overhead Claps
    Chinooks
    MNC’s

    Mosey to the Coupons

    The Thang

    “Ages”

    11’s but instead of 11 it’s the individual pax’s age.

    Each round decrease first exercise by 5 & increase the second excercise by 5. So for YHC my first round is 29 & 1, second round is 24 & 6, etc.

    50 & over can decrease by 10’s.

    Bottom exercise is bench press with coupons.

    Top exercise is squats

    Firing line – 94 Calf Raises.

    Ring of Fire Thrusters (x10)
    Resting is plank with coupon
    Give YHC some advice when done.

    Put up Coupons and mosey to pad

    Penguins x 19
    Protractors
    Freddie Mercury’s
    Box cutters
    Appreciators

    YHC is so appreciative of the role that F3 has been in my life for just over 2 years now. It has helped me grow, not just physically, but mentally and as a leader. YCH cannot express the value that has been added to my life through this group of men who get up early and workout. It was a pleasure toto kick off the third decade leading the Pax through a beatdown for the Ages.

  • A VQ to remember, a sacrifice was required – from SamBreaux

    4 men gathered on Independence Day-eve to witness my VQ. Little did we know it was a going away party for my wedding ring. RIP

    Disclaimer and mosey to the football field

    Warmup: SSH, windmills, grass grabbers, arm circles, self love, low slow squats

    Grab a rock and regroup at the north endzone where he honored US Marine Capt. Garrett Lawton, killed by an IED in August of 2008 while serving our country in Afghanistan.

    North endzone (with rock): 20 curls, 20 chest presses
    Sprint 100 yards
    South endzone: 20 air squats, 20 merkins
    Sprint back

    x5 for 100 reps of each exercise and 1,000 yards

    Bonus work:
    Overhead press x 10
    Rows x 10
    Mountain climbers x 10

    Return to rock pile

    6MOM: Flutter kicks, dolly, LBCs, freddie mercurys, dying cockroach, wife pleasers, leg lifts

    Mosey back to flag

    Count-o-rama
    Name-o-rama
    Announcements
    Intentions
    Prayer
    UGSFSR (Unsuccessful group search for Sambreaux’s ring)

  • Hold up Steve! I’ve got you! – from Jose10k

    YHC was lucky that his wife reminded him that he had the Q for the beatdown today. I honestly forgot, and I was hoping to take a day off. The alarm was set, but no early morning shenanigans. I knew exactly how to add those awesome “extras” Zoolander has inspired us to do. Absent this morning: Shooter. Where o where is shooter? I arrived to Steve, trying to get his early burpees in before the beatdown. I quickly yelled out to him: I got you bro.
    Warm-up: SSH, torso twists, snap crackle pop( apparently a Covington warm-up), toe touches.
    The thang: In breezy conditions (tropical storm Beryl made things bearable this morning, I crack myself up sometimes) we moseyed to the marsh to utilize the playground equipment. We did a modified mini murph. 10 sets: 5-10-15 of pull-ups, burpees, SMK for the first 3, then squats to round out the remaining sets. Two of us sweated excessively, while Steve made it look effortlessly. Despite the challenging exercises with heavy sweating, Russo and myself surivived, while Steve smiled at us. Mosey back to the street to lunge walk a block. Russo and myself discussed Electrolytes and dehydration. Y’all don’t even know the struggles of hyperhidrosis, but luckily for both him and I, we have great Katie’s in our lives that know when to take care of us. Maybe we need to bring out some Brawndo ( it is afterall, what the plants crave). Once at the stop sign, we planked up for 1 minute. Moseyed back to grandmas for another round of 1 minute plank. 5 minutes remaining which normally means Mary, however, with the chatter on the run back, YHC decided to use those 5 minutes for some well needed deep stretches. COT, Russo prayed us out with intentions of those affected by the hurricane and the sudden death of his coworker. Thanks for letting me lead Gentlemen, and thanks for the read. SYITG

  • Walk a mile in my shoes(with a rock) – from Hand Grenada

    Disclaimer and head out in clockwise fashion on track.
    First stop roughly qtr mile, arm circles IcX10, self love IcX10
    Mosey to 2nd stop, scantron stretch IcX5, grass grabber IcX10
    Mosey to 3rd stop, windmills IcX10, seal claps IcX10
    Mosey to rock pile, squat twist for bogey IcX5, overhead claps IcX10

    Grab a rock that your comfortable toting a mile(mahatma & Mr. rogers eyes were hungrier than their biceps) mosey counterclockwise back around track

    First stop, overhead press IcX10, rows IcX10
    Mosey to 2nd stop, chest press IcX10, tricep ext Icx10
    Mosey to 3rd stop, side lunge IcX10, squats IcX10
    Mosey back to rock pile, sumo squats IcX10, 10 burpees OYO for dessert

    6MOM
    LBC IcX20
    Metal Snips IcX15
    Leg raises IcX10
    BBSU IcX10

    Mosey back to flag, countoff, name-o-rama, announcements, intentions, prayer, dismiss.

    Always a privelage & pleasure to lead and I sincerely thank you men for the opportunity. Congrats on starting your Monday 1up!!

  • Sweaty Bells! – 7-7-2024 – from Almonaster

    Hot, Humid, Worth it!

    PAX Attended:

    – Strings
    – Subprime
    – Jingle Vader
    – Almonaster

    Warm-up.

    Stretch
    SSH – 20 IC
    Arm Circles – 10 IC
    Reverse Arm Circles – 10 IC
    Imperial Walkers – 10 IC
    Grass Grabbers – 10 IC
    Windmills – 10 IC
    Mountain Climbers – 10 IC

    The Thang!

    Take a lap!

    Shrugs – 50 IC
    Kettlebell Press – 20 IC
    Right Arm Press – 10 IC
    Left Arm Press – 10 IC
    Two Arm Rows – 20 IC
    Right Arm Rows – 10 IC
    Left Arm Rows – 10 IC
    Curls – 50 IC
    Triceps Extensions – 50 IC

    Take a lap!

    Kettlebell Swings – 20 OYO
    Dead Lift – 25 IC
    Deep Goblet Squats with a three second hold – 10 IC
    Right and Left Leg Lunge – 10 IC

    Take a lap!

    Man makers – 5 OYO
    Plank KettleBell Throughs – 20 IC
    Right Arm Plank Rows – 10 IC
    Left Arm Plank Rows – 10 IC

    Mary

    Helloo Dolly! With the Bell – 20 IC
    Ukrainian Douillie’s – 20 IC

    Back to Flag

    Birthdays
    Anniversaries
    Announcements
    Intentions
    Prayer
    Coffeeteria

    Thanks for the opportunity to lead!

  • The Seven – from Fracsac

    7 HIMs posted to the Renni to see what YHC had in store. Shovel flag planted, brief disclaimer given and the warmup facing the bacon began where Star Wars references were in full force. #IYKYK

    Thang One – Stations

    LBCs
    Jump rope
    Sweetness toss
    Big boi sit-ups
    Kettlebell swings
    Freddie Mercs
    Burpees x 12 timer

    Thang Two

    Frisbee run around NOMA. Last man to front with frisbee then throw to last man. A drop is a roll of the beat down die.
    Pax getting too good at frisbee. Only one drop, so next round is 3 passes per run to front. The mere thought of such a feat brought severe anxiety to the pax and there were many drops, hence several rolls and several sets of exercises.

    Final Thang

    Back of NOMA for the Wapner!

    8 count Body Builders x 10
    30 second rest
    8 count Body Builders x 10
    2 pax given the opportunity to forgo final round if they catch and throw frisbee 15 yards.
    8 count body builders x 10

    Finish with Sunday Mornings

    Back to the Flag for COT

    NMM

    YHC signed up to Q late Saturday and had no idea what to do. Leading is never easy but it’s always rewarding.

    Step up, Sign Up, and Lead! We have an incredibly supportive group of men!

    It’s hot and humid, so stay hydrated!

    SYITG