F3 New Orleans

Tag: Chainsaw

  • Fire Fighter Challenge Part Deux – from Bushwacker

    I feel I’ve been so delinquent in my commitment to F3 lately and it showed as I tried to start the warmorama. IMHO (as the kids put it), that delinquency continued right on through the beat down with my unorganized leadership, chaotic participation, and off-the-cuff modifications. But YHC brought the coupons, set the games in motion, and we all watched with little surprise as the former Marsh Madness champion and current King of Distain quite literally ran away with the Badaxe award this go ’round. Nonetheless, all men (regardless of age) put forth an effort most valiant indeed!

    WARMORAMA
    As previously mentioned, QIC felt entirely out of practice, forgetting exercise names, miscalling cadences, and generally flubbing my return. But PAX kept showing up until the ranks grew to a respectable number. Even after out our mosey to the shaft, Grundy popped up to fiddle around with our tires.

    THANG
    Farmer’s Carry
    Sledge Hammer Tire
    Tire Flip
    Tire Pull
    Prisoner’s Carry
    Tire Drag
    Chain of Doom
    Lunge Walk

    Teams of 2-3 did 3 1 minute rounds switching between the coupon and plank or al gore. We kept this up until, with 5 minutes remaining, the 4 bad asses competing for the Badaxe award ran the tire drag for time. As previously mentioned, our own reverend pastor preacher man took home the prize… until next time!

    COT
    On the spot we carried out count/nameorama, with zoo having departed prematurely. I appreciate you guys. I cherish my time with you guys. Many many thanks!

  • The MURPH – from Jose10k

    It was simple: 100 pull-ups, 200 push-ups, 300 squats, and 2 miles. We had split off into different groups of different levels, but in the end it was 14 of my F3 brothers completing the Murph this morning. COT, Hammer prayed us out with special intentions for TruCoats friend and Zoolanders father.

  • F3 Kickball: Chico’s Bail Bonds v Xscissor – from Akbar

    18 men showed in the gloom this morning for a game of F3 Kickball. We are taught to modify as necessary, and learn through trial and error that some things work, and some things don’t. Even the best laid plans go wrong sometimes, and it happened today. Below is the way YHC envisioned it, and then what really happened.

    PAX Hammer, Minnow, Chainsaw, Pickaxe, Gilligan, Moby Dick, Agent Carl, Jose 10k, Zoolander, Grundy, Steve, JV, Shooter, Waterpik, Dangerfield, Maverick, Russo, Akbar

    Warm Up x10 IC – Merkins, IW, Self-Love, Grass Grabbers, SSH, Arm Circles F/B, Toe Touches

    Thang: F3 Kickball
    Count off 1’s and 2’s to form 2 teams. Run to the baseball field in teams, arrive at the field, plank up in teams to pick team names.

    Rules for Kickers

    Kick the ball and mosey around all bases without stopping while kicking team holds plank until the kick is launched. Modes of travel will change in each inning. Modification for runners is always a backwards run. When you score, you get 1 point and lead your team in 5 Wife Pleasers IC while the fielders do Nolan Ryans. Penalty exercises on outs, strikes, and fouls – 10 Australian Mountain Climbers (2=1) OYO while field does Nolan Ryans. No bunting.

    Rules for Fielders

    Ball is not in play until it touches the ground. When the ball hits the ground, fielders must do an exercise before they touch the ball – unless it is a pop fly. If a pop fly is caught, catcher gets to choose kicking team exercises x 5IC or 10 OYO. If ball is dropped on the catch, regular rules apply and exercises must be done before touching the ball. No pegging runners while running with blocks and no forced outs.

    Game
    3 outs or 1x through the lineup, no catcher, winner chooses exercise for losing team at the Flag.

    Pre-Game – The PAX lined up for the National Anthem by Metallica.

    Exercises for Kickers and Fielders
    Inning 1: Farmers Carry, Squat Hold and 30 Air Presses
    Inning 2: Brick Fly Runs, 20 Bobby Hurleys
    Inning 3: Rifle Carry, 20 Big Boy Situps
    Inning 4: Brick Hallelujah Run, 20 Diamond Merkins
    Inning 5: Bear Crawl, Renegade Row Merkins

    What really happened – YHC explained the rules clearly and effectively and it was decided the rules would be explained as we played. The idea is the fielders do exercises to give the runners time to score, assuming that all balls would be kicked in the outfield. That was not the case. By some magic, the balls were kicked into the players at the infield and just sat there. Someone mentioned very early on this would be a low scoring game. In fact, the first inning lasted about 20 minutes. Even the QIC forgot to do exercises sometimes.

    So we went to straight up kickball, regular rules, for the last 10 minutes and a new plan for the next game swirled around in YHC’s head.

    The final score was 9 to 7, Chico’s Bail Bonds took home the pride.

    We got back to the flag a little late, and Shooter prayed us out. Great to have Agent Carl with us, EH’d by Toto, who has been lost somewhere in Oz for the last year. Come back Toto!

    Count, Name, and Shooter prayed us out.

    Thanks for following my lead –
    SYITG, Akbar

  • On Your Mark. Get Set. Go! – from Bird

    Cool morning at the Lakefront with 14 PAX posting. Looked to be a slim crowd at first as QIC was greeted by Moby Dick and Sonny (aka Turbo Dog) after returning from coupon delivery to Milestone Marsh. Welcome to everyone, glad to see Cathy returning following the previous week’s Merkin Madness, now let’s get to it.
    Warmarama consisted of SSH (20 IC), Good Mornings (10 IC), High Knees (20 IC), what’s that exercise called where you touch your elbow to your knees? Oh year, Imperial Walkers, thanks Russo (10 IC). Hillbillies, the alter ego of Imperial Walkers (10IC), Windwills (10IC). QIC directed to plank position to complete Mountain Climbers (10IC), Peter Parkers (10IC), Parker Peters (10IC), Groiners (10IC), and Merkins (10OYO). As PAX would come to find out, we would end the day in similar fashion… Upon completing the warm up, PAX mosied to Noah’s Ark.

    QIC divided PAX into two teams by counting off and groups separated on each side of the neutral ground (do we call it that on the Northshore?). QIC attempted to explain the workout, although some clarification and tweaking was required as we moved through. The theory was for each team to sprint one block (app. 0.1 mile – 200 meters-ish) for the five blocks from Lakeshore to Livingston (five round). As each person arrived, they would immediately commence prescribed exercise doing AMRAP until final member of team arrived. Cumulative reps of the team were counted when all members arrived and the team with the most reps was declared the winner. Losing team was then assigned double the number of reps to complete for a core exercise to be prescribed by winning team. Losing team, in turn, prescribed core exercise to winning team. I know, confusing right, thus the required tweaking.

    On Your Mark. Get Set. Go.

    Round 1. After impressive sprints by all PAX, round 1 exercise was jump squats. Team 1 proved victorious with 48ish cumulative total compared with Team 2 40ish. Team 2 was assigned 96 hello dollies and Team 1 was assigned 40ish American Hammers. “How does this work again, cause that’s a lot of reps!”

    Round 2. One Legged Burpees. Team 1 victorious again. Team 2 assigned double reps of leg raises (don’t remember, but it was a lot of reps – 40-50). Team 1 assigned Crunchy Frogs (Q didn’t feel number of reps was beneath the victorious Team 1 sprinters, so he assigned Crunch Frogs (IC).

    Round 3. Merkins. At this point, the number of reps was getting ridiculous (in the 100s and double that would have crippled the rest of the workout), so QIC audibled and assigned the same exercise to each team (LBCs) with no doubling. Team cumulative reps assigned to opposing teams were retained.

    Round 4. Sister Mary Katherines. Core exercise that now alludes me.

    Round 5. Burpees. 100s
    After first phase of workout complete, PAX recovery walked to Milestone Marsh and removed coupons from back of QIC’s truck. Three rounds of four exercise (10 reps each OYO) consisting of thrusters, kettle bell swings, pullups, and hanging knee raises. QIC directed to hold plank until the six completed each round before beginning the next.
    With three rounds complete, PAX loaded back coupons, short recovery walk, and then mosy (app. 0.5 mile) back to the flag. A few of the PAX held a brief interlude at the seawall to complete 25 freak nasties (IC).

    Back at the flag, QIC demonstrated Absolution as the final exercise of the day, an eight count routine consisting of (from plank), groiner (1, 2), low plank (3, 4), plank jack (5, 6), high plank (7, 8). PAX did five IC and then directed to complete OYO until 0730. With PAX waning, QIC called for five more and then time.

    COT. Announcements (don’t forget the Nehemiah Project – Hammer, Grundy – on starting on March 18th). QIC prayed us out.

  • A Bonnie Blair By Any Other Name Still Sucks – from Zoolander

    I know it says Zoolander was the Q for this one, but that’s only because YHC’s name isn’t on the dropdown menu yet. And, it was ultimately Zoo’s idea to get the fellas from down the bayou to Q a November Lakefront beatdown, and we couldn’t be more grateful!

    YHC showed up in the Goosemobile with four men and two boys who’ve been looking forward to this for weeks. It’s become very clear to me over the years that God has wired men in such a way that the more we suffer together, the more we come to care deeply about each other’s well being, regardless of differences in background, lifestyle, (number of kids), etc. So, it was easy to jump at the opportunity to travel north and lead a beatdown out of gratitude for the men who have allowed me to suffer with them and who first shared the gift of F3 with me. Now, the cycle is continuing down in Thibodaux with a growing PAX!

    Disclaimer was stated for the benefit of an FNG (Welcome, Crock Pot!). Warmups consisted of IC: SSH, Windmills, Imperial Walkers, Arm Circles, Cherry Pickers, Self Love, High Knees, and Butt Kicks, followed by a mosey to Noah’s Ark.

    YHC revealed an F3 Workout Deck, and three cards were pulled and listed exercises completed with a promise of more random suffering to come. This was followed by partner BLIMPS, but with a bit of a twist. Grundy’s late arrival provided an opportunity to reminisce back to YHC’s first beatown, whcih was Q’d by Grundy. It included Sister Mary Catherine’s in the warmup, which totally burned out my legs before we even got to Noah’s Ark. A fitting memory to share before introducing these BLIMPS:

    Thang 1:
    Partner 1 ran around Noah’s Ark, while Partner 2 huffed and puffed his way through their shared total of:
    50 Bonnie Blairs (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Lunge Jumps (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Iron Mikes (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Merkins,
    50 Plank Jacks,
    50 Sister Mary Catherine’s (SMC’s)

    Thang 2:
    Moseyed once again, stopping to complete exercises from three more cards from the deck, then lining up along the wall for two version of a newly minted “Indian Inchworm Wall Crawl”. The first version consisted of all PAX in dip position on the wall moving to the right and completing a dip with every “step” while the man in the rear of the line crab walked to the front. After a number of traffic jams and Bushwacker grumbles, the last of the PAX had crabbed their way to the front, so it was time to turn around and go the other way. Pax assumed the irkin position on the wall and moved to the right, completing an irkin with every “step”. The rearmost PAX bear crawled their way to the front of the line this time, so things moved a little more quickly.

    Thang 3:
    Another short mosey brought us to a grassy area big enough for the highly anticipated Tunnel of Love. Ironically, Zoolander had just shared his gratitude that YHC hadn’t included this exercise since it was a memorable highlight from my VQ a few years back. So, it was with a special joy that I announced that all PAX would be snuggling up shoulder to shoulder in plank position while the rearmost PAX in the line army crawled through Tunnel of Love. Bushwacker’s encouraging “love whacks” kept the line moving while the plankers’ shoulders burned and threatened to give out.

    Hope then rose in the hearts of many as we lined up for what would be a wildly chaotic Indian run back to the flag with many PAX digging deep, knowing that this would ultimately be the last time they’d have to push. But, YHC knew what lurked amongst the cards in the deck, and after two relatively harmless pulls to fill the small amount of time left before 7:30, a third and final pull was offered to the FNG. It was the new guy, at 7:29, who managed to pull the 400 meter sprint card, arguably the worst card in the deck. So, despite the shared astonishment and disbelief, the beatdown ended with 25 men sprinting toward an inhabited car and then back to the flag, all residual energy and will to live good and drained.

    COT, announcements, and prayer by Enron of F3 Thibodaux.

    Coffeeteria offered time to catch up and enjoy the beautiful weather before the long ride home to Thibodaux. All PAX in the Goosemobile shared their gratitude for the opportunity to experience F3 on that level and for the men who were willing to suffer with us as we continue to strive to get better at doing hard things. It was a great gift to get to spend such high quality time with you guys this morning, and I very much look forward to seeing you in the gloom (wherever that gloom might be)!

  • The Young and the Restless: IPC week 1.2 – from Akbar

    15 braved the Lakefront on a beautiful day for a beatdown, 1 in a stroller. No, it was not Bushwacker. The 2nd day of IPC week 1 was upon us, and the plan was to have 2 Q’s. Jose 10k took the 2nd Q with a plan for football, but with only 3 PAX not doing IPC, it was a bust. So – Jose10k and Barely Legal did it again. T Claps guys.

    After an elongated explanation and several questions, the playlist started and we got to work. Speedy and Tank were out of the gate hot with Hammer not far behind. Great work again guys, everyone finished. Here are the results from the score sheet – missing a few times.

    Speedy 26.24

    Tank 27.16

    Hammer 29.56

    Zoolander 30.0

    Steve 32.30

    Chainsaw 32.28

    Akbar 36.15

    Jose 10k 37:33

    Slider 38.15

    Enter your times here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdesBJtTGntJx9e2UfhmmcMyZ_UGEy6TtFk50Mz-W4DHHcN-w/viewform

    Bushwacker arrived at 0700 after his shift and Moby came strolling up in his convertible just in time for COT.

    And yes, Speedy beat Tanked UP! Impressive, a 17 year old and a 62 year old take the top 2 times. Tank may not be that restless – he went to cut a yard right after COT.

    YHC had trouble lifting the phone for a picture after this beatdown, great work by all.

    Jose10k prayed us out with thoughts and prayers, remembering 911.

    Coffeeteria at Book and the Bean.

  • Rock You Like A Hurricane – from Akbar

    YHC arrived early in the gloom to plant the flag’s, knowing that the pre-thang crew would see it and wonder what was in store. Jose 10k an Tanked Up! came running up from the 2 miler and settled in with 5 others as we began the warm-up.

    Conditions: mid 70’s, no rain, slight breeze

    Warm Up:

    SSH, IW, HB, HKNEE’s x 20

    Freestyle, backstroke x10

    THANG 80’S – one of the best decades, especially for music.

    Partner up, 80 reps per exercise. P1 works, P2 mosey’s to the flag and does 5 Hand Release Merkins, then returns to relive Partner 1. Sets were divided into 3 exercises of 80 reps each, when done plank for the 6. We did 6 rounds as outlined below.

    1. Shoulder taps (1=1), twinkle toes, freak nasty, karaoke, 5 HR Merkins

    2. Stone Mountain, superman, air squared (Al-gore with overhead clap), bear crawl, 5 HR Merkins

    3. Nolan Ryan’s, Freak Nasties, Monkey Humpers, sprint, 5 HR Merkins

    At this time, Zoolander showed up and joined in. Better late than never.

    4. Shoulder taps (2=1), twinkle toes, freak nasty, run 5 HR Merkins

    5. Stone mountain, squats, LBC, lunge walk to flag, 5 HR Merkins

    6. Nolan Ryans, Freak Nasties, Monkey Humpers, backward lunge to flag, 5 HR Merkins

    Head back to the flag for Mary

    Box cutters X 20 – 6 inch hold (feet together), dolly out, up, together, down= 4ct

    LBC, E2K L/R X20; LEG RAISES, HANDS TO HEALS X10

    Count, name, Happy Birthday (57) Yellow Snow! Hammer prayed us out – safety for all during and after the storm.

    It’s been a great two years: met a lot of great men, lost a lot of weight, did some stupid stuff, and look forward to doing it again and again. Thanks, Russo, for the EH!

    NMM
    The main thang went a lot faster than YHC expected. Originally only having 3 rounds of 6 exercises total, another 3 rounds were added with some quick thinking. Basically, whatever Bushwacker complained about – we did more of. He was sore from work – which is a lot harder than what most of us do.

    Hammer entertained us with his insane knowledge of everything, peppering “did you knows” or “remember when’s” throughout the beatdown.

    Jose 10k was hurting from last night, and after a while just did whatever he wanted (he did run with Tank on the pre-thang). Thankfully Zoo showed up to take his place. See what missing Pickle Ball does to you? Great work guys.

    Playlist:

    · Ratt – Wanted Man, Round & Round
    · Scorpions – Rock You Like A Hurricane, No One Like You
    · Def Leppard – Rock of Ages
    · Whitesnake – Still of the Night
    · Quiet Riot – Cum on Feel the Noise, Bang Your Head
    · Billy Squier – The Stroke
    · 38 Special – Hold on Loosely
    · The Clash – Should I Stay or Should I Go
    · AC/DC – Back in Black
    · Twisted Sister – I Wanna Rock
    · Tesla – Modern Day Cowboy
    · The Cult – Love Removal Machine
    · Skid Row – Youth Gone Wild
    · Van Halen – Hot for Teacher
    · Queensryche – Jet City Woman
    · Echo and the Bunnymen – Lips Like Sugar
    · Violet Femmes – Blister in the Sun

  • Bunch of Dora’s – from Akbar

    16 PAX arrived at the Lakefront Saturday to get better. Today’s agenda would be simple, a Steve workout if you will. Dora 123 * 3. Great to be back with my brothers after a 10 day vacation.

    WU – SSH, Merkins, High Knees, Butt Kicks x 25. Grass Grabbers, Self-Love, Arm Circles (F/B) x 10

    THANG: 3 Doras, partners switch each time

    Mosey to the wall at Rips

    Dora 1

    Partner 1 runs to the top of the stairs at Rips, 10 Calf Raises, return to relieve Partner 2

    100 Stone Mountain (feet on wall)

    200 Freak Nasty

    300 Halleluiah Squat (hand up in the air)

    Mosey to the wall at the Gazebo

    Dora 2

    Partner 1 Bear Crawls to sidewalk, mosey back to relieve Partner 2

    100 Dirkins

    200 Gas Pumps

    300 Superman Rows

    Mosey back to the flag

    Dora 3

    Lightning round, partner 1 runs to the street and back, relieve partner 2

    50 Big Boy Situps

    100 American Hammers (2 is 1)

    150 Step Ups (1 is 1)

    Most were finished with 2 minutes left, but not all. QIC called recover and we circled up to honor The Manny with 25 Little Manny Crunches.

    Count, Name-o-Rama. Welcome Swole Patrol!

    NMM – T Claps to The Manny for making the trip from Picayune, great to see you brother. Manny will try and make 2 workouts a month going forward. And to Grundy for the EH of Swole Patrol, who walked up late with no fear and jumped right in. Going head-to-head in Bear Crawls with Swole was quite impressive, he gave it all he had. Chainsaw and Pickaxe teamed up with YHC for the lightning round, with impressive modifications and counts. Also great to see Bypass again for his 3rd beatdown of the week. We worked a lot more shoulders than I thought, mine are still burning at this writing. Hammer named Swole, reminiscing back to his working days on the West Bank – where he saw a stout dude in a truck with Swole Patrol emblazoned on the front. Good work men.

  • Time to be a Big Boy – from Waterpik

    Crowds have been smaller than usual this summer at the various beatdowns around town with many regulars out of
    Town with family vacations.

    Circle up around the shovel flags to warmup, with SSHs, ACs, squats, imperial walkers.

    Mosey westward almost to the gazebo and the pax got down to business.

    First up were 11s with derkins on the sea wall and burpees at the street. YHC instructed the pax to bear crawl to the walking path, then jog to the street to do the burpees. On the way back the pax back pedaled.

    Only about halfway to the closing bell, YHC made sure everyone was a Big Boy. Partner up and do 3 sets of 20 Big Boy sit ups while partner holds feet down. Switch.

    Circle back up for a set of Al Gores. Sprinkle in some Peter parkers, and one footed and two feet hops. 15 minutes to spare.

    Last on the list for this downpainment was a set of 5s. Same as previous with Derkins and burpees as the exercises.

    With less than 5 minutes to spare, the pax moseyed back to the flags.

    Cot and thanks to Manny for praying us out.

    Thanks for letting me lead

  • Northshore H8! Practically Perfect in Every Way – from TurboTax

    21 PAX posted for the fourth semi-annual and second official Northshore H8! which, like Mary Poppins, was practically perfect in every way. The weather was great, the course was marked clearly and the PAX were motivated. Plus everyone knew that whatever we did it would be at least .01% better than anything the Southshore could accomplish. We have the Freedom Hammer to prove it.

    Anywho…we hit it hard. Reputations were burnished, feelings were hurt and everyone seemed to get their money’s worth. Several PAX completed eight laps and those that didn’t weren’t far behind. Except, of course, for Akbar who very conveniently was “injured.” YHC didn’t see any doctor’s note…just sayin.

    8 laps translates to 3.2 miles running, 550 yards of bear crawls, 36 burpees and 120 hand release Merkins. Not too shabby.

    So rest up for 6 months, guys, and we’ll test ourselves again in November. Thanks for letting me lead. Over and out.