F3 New Orleans

Tag: Tuesday Tuff

  • Questionable Records – from Honeysuckle

    Nine men emerged from the gloom to join YHC at the stage on a wet Tuesday Tuff morning.
    They had been promised trivia and records, but first a few things had to be taken care of.  

    Warmarama: SSH, Imperial Walkers, Willie Mays Hayes,Windmills, Arm Circles (F/R), Cherry Pickers, Carolina High Knees, Carolina Butt Kicks, Mountain Climbers 

    Thang 1

    Mosey toward Rich Man’s Loop and stop at The Point.  PAX were divided into two teams.  These teams would be together for the duration of the beatdown.  Team 1 would nur to the next light pole, then run to the following light pole, and then do 5 burpees.  The team could not proceed until all members did their 5 burpees.  Then they would begin again with a nur.  Team 2 would do the same thing, but start with a run and do a nur second.   

    YHC was asked, “Is this a race?”  It was not a race in the sense that who the “winner” was didn’t affect anything in the rest of the beatdown.  The de facto result of being the winner was that you got to the coupons first.  Which was something that would matter (a little) today.

    After some initial jockeying for the lead of the non-race, the two teams became staggered so that Team 1 was finishing burpees as Team 2 arrived to begin theirs.  From a congestion management perspective, this was a nice result.  

    The teams were to not visit Financially Stable Man’s Alley today but instead head straight for the coupons.  Around the same time that Team 1 was arriving to the coupons, which would have also been a convenient time to use the bathroom due to the Port-o-Let there, a mysterious white truck also arrived to the area.  As YHC was with Team 2, it is only hearsay that the Team 1 PAX attempted an EH at which point only the sound of electronic door locks being engaged could be heard.  In reality, the truck was from Lowe’s, trying to track down a pallet load of cinder blocks that a man in alpaca fur stole from them Ocean’s Eleven style. 

    Team 1 graciously grabbed extra coupons for Team 2 so that a full Port-o-Let visit wasn’t required.   

    Thang 2

    After returning to the stage area, the second thang was revealed.  YHC would announce an exercise for the PAX to begin, and play a song from the classic rock era (all well etched in YHC’s memory due to decades of listening to Eagle 98.1), and the team in control (control would alternate between teams 1 and 2) had roughly 30 seconds to name the artist and song title.  If both weren’t named, then the other team would be allowed to guess for 30 seconds.  At the end of this time, a team would have either 0, 1, or 2 correct guesses, corresponding to some exercises.

    0=10 thrusters
    1 = 5 thrusters
    2 = 2 thrusters

    But that’s not all!  The song would continue, and the exercise would continue, long enough for YHC to ask some additional trivia questions tangentially related to the song.  Each correct answer here would subtract one thruster.  YHC forgot the list of exercises at home so we did the best we could.  As you will see, YHC forgot a lot of the results of the day but you will get the gist of it.   

    Song 1 exercise: Crab dip

    YHC continues to try to champion this move but there is little traction so far.  The song wasPurple Haze by Jimi Hendrix.  Team 1 got both these.  YHC asked what brewery makes Purple Haze (Abita), what style beer is it (Lager).  What two types of particles can cause a haze (smoke, dust), and dust from what area sometimes causes a haze in the southeast US during the summer (Sahara desert) 

    Song 2 exercise: Tempo squats

    The song was Slow Ride by Foghat.  I believe this one was split?  Other trivia questions: Slowest mammal (sloth), slowest sea creature (seahorse), name of an air mass over a body of water that can produce fog/clouds (marine layer).  Marine layer was one of the few times the PAX was stumped.   

    Song 3 exercise: Hold Al Gore?

    The song was Won’t Get Fooled Again by the Who.  By this point, it was starting to become clear that America’s Best knew all the answers and was just waiting until time was almost up to sneak in his guesses. Trivia dealt with famous April Fools jokes according to Google, such as what number with non-repeating digits did the Alabama legislature try to change (pi), what did they want to change the value to (3)?  Taco Bell announced it purchased this US Landmark to help pay down the national debt (Liberty Bell).  The last line of the song may be its most famous; what is it? (Meet the new boss, the same as the old boss.) 

    Song 4 exercise: Merkins?

    Radar Love by Golden Earring.  This was split, with AB coming up with the band name in the follow up round.  The trivia dealt with the words making up the acronym radar (Radio detection and ranging).  This took a while, and the PAX didn’t get “ranging”.  But then after we stopped YHC remembered the other questions.  RADAR is spelled the same forward and backward, what is the name for that (Palindrome).  Fill in the blank of this palindrome: A man. A plan. A canal. _____ (Panama).  PAX were on top of all this.   

    Song 5 exercise: Apollo ohnos ?

    FM by Steely Dan.  Did I mention Team 1 wasn’t doing many thrusters today?  Trivia: What does FM mean (Frequency modulation).  The line from the song “no static at all” is a comparative reference to what (AM radio).  What does AM mean (amplitude modulation).  Several PAX knew all these but Goose notably ate these questions up. YHC avoided asking any questions related to the origin of Steely Dan’s name.  

    Song 6 exercise: LBCs?

    LA woman by the Doors.  YHC shouldn’t have even asked Team 1 to get coupons today.  Trivia: YHC is thinking of 10 men’s professional sports teams in the LA area.  Name them.  Credit only starts after 6 are named.  (Rams, Chargers, Angels, Dodgers, Lakers, Clippers, LA Galaxy were all guessed. Others are Ducks, Kings, LA Football Club).  Then, name two women’s professional teams (Sparks (guessed), Angel City Football Club not guessed). 

    Song 7: WWI sit ups?

    Surrender by Cheap Trick. Name the place where Lee surrendered to Grant (Appomattox Courthouse).  Name the country that surrendered to end WWII (Japan). 

    Song 8 (bonus, 1 minute left)

    Kashmir by Led Zeppelin.  This song was sampled by what hip hop artist (Puff Daddy).  What was the name of that song?  At this point, Enron swooped in and answered the as-of-yet unasked question, what movie was the song in? (Godzilla).  This is the question that YHC didn’t think anyone would get the answer to, yet alone offer as a fact unsolicited.  

    By the way, the name of the song is “Come with me”.  Time ran out before YHC got to ask a few sweater-related questions (“No, it’s a cardigan, but thanks for asking”).  And several songs remained unplayed, including one by Cream which would have made Popeye happy, along with some cooking related questions.  Maybe next time.    

    Announcements; Wet Tap prayed us out. 

    YHC is impressed once again by the dedication and effort of the PAX, and today their mental muscles were on display as well.  It was a privilege to Q this morning.  

    SYITG,
    Honeysuckle  

  • St. Joseph and a Psycho Killer – from Goose

    There are rare occasions upon which YHC comes to discover that his firm opinions about some or other aspect of life may not be as accurate or informed as he once thought. And, sometimes, on even rarer occasions, YHC might even seek out deeper or unknown aspects of a particular area of life that much of the population seem to value but YHC sees as worthless or worse. This morning, YHC would share the results of one such venture.

    in a sliver of openness to potential value of country music, YHC stumbled across an old gem: “Psycho” by Jack Kittel, recorded in 1974. And, that’s as far as it got. No need to foray any deeper. The refrain starts, in a slow Texas drawl, “You think I’m psycho don’t you, mama?” So much for country.

    When YHC revealed that we’d be utilizing the results of his recent country study in this morning’s first exercise, the PAX had high hopes for either a country-conversion or something funny like “I Wanna Marry the Troops”. It didn’t take long for those hopes and giggles to fade into a few quetly uttered, “Oh, no”s.
    -Plank for the duration, merkins on “mama”.

    We recovered (physically), and moved into the actual theme of the beatdown, St. Joseph’s Day.
    St. Joseph went through some tough stuff, but it allowed him to participate at the deepest level in the most incredible, important event that has ever occurred on earth: God became man and lived among us. But, it wasn’t until he allowed himself, his decision-making to be led by a God he trusted despite not being able to see where it was all going.

    St. Joseph Dora–partner up for:

    1. St. Joseph finds out she’s pregnant and tries to sneak out and hit the road, but is stopped by the Angel Gabriel and runs back to Mary and her child: 100 Australian Sweat Angels, P2 sneaks out to the street and runs to the stop sign and nurs back.

    2. The governor selfishly calls for a census and forces everyone to travel back to the place of their heredity, and Joseph leads pregnant Mary all the way to Bethlehem, where he finds no room for them. But all these horrible circumstances lead to the fulfillment of many important prophecies and ultimately the revelation of God-become-man in a newborn: 200 genuflections while partner bear crawls to the sidewalk and runs back. (The Bonnie Blair b-day celebration yesterday made for some slow, sloppy genuflections.)

    3. The psycho king moves to kill all the young children in Bethlehem, and though God saves his son from an early death, He doesn’t stop Herod (or anyone else from then till now) from causing unimaginable suffering. Joseph flees with the baby and his mother to Egypt in obedience to the angel: 300 mummy walks (straight legs, toes touching outstretched hands) while partner cariocas to the sidewalk and back.

    After this, YHC waxed a bit on the nature of God’s decision to allow evil and suffering to continue in order to safeguard man’s freedom, which is required for his capacity to fully live and love. Instead of messing with that, in a genius stroke, he entered into our suffering, united himself to us exactly where he knew we felt most vulnerable, alone, and human. He knew that sharing our suffering (completely) would be an infinitely greater gift than taking it away, and he allowed St. Josph to do this with him from the very moment of his conception in Mary’s womb.

    They went through some tough stuff, but St. Joseph also got to live with him in their small little family and help form him into the man God had planned for him to be. Life in this family had to be incredibly blessed, so we would share in that blessing by sharing some suffering, too.

    Split into groups of 3: while one does 15 8-count bodybuilders, the other two are doing either LBC’s or SSH until he’s finished, then they rotate. Once done, they caught a quick 10-count before heading up to the Stage with 5. minutes remaining on the clock.

    One of the things St. Joseph is most known for is being upside down, buried in someone’s yard. The homeowners are under the impression this will somehow bring about the speedy sale of their home….No idea.

    In reparation for our boy being put so often into the dirt headfirst like a tent stake, the PAX took their positions, each near a column, for a Balls to the Wall Merkin Ring of Fire. Upside down, with feet up on the post and hands on the ground, the PAX took turns doing an upside down, head-first merkin, counting by each up to 40. Any further and more than one PAX would have passed out (and dental waivers may have needed to be passed out, too).

    We finished exactly at 6:00 and stepped down for COT, and Valve prayed us out.

    St. Joseph gave one of the best examples of how shared suffering is more of a gift than any comfort, knowledge, wealth, or fame could ever provide. He was allowed to share in God’s own suffering and life. This may sound unrealistic, but why else would 8 men show up at 5:15 am to let someone else tell them what they’re all gonna do, and the only guarantee is that it will hurt. And we can’t get enough. It’s not because we’re crazy, but because we were made for so much more than just avoiding pain and getting through day. We were made to choose to enter into life fully, and to do that with and for others in spite of (and actually through) suffering.

    Thanks for being willing to suffer with me this morning, fellas! I’ve never felt so alive!

    SYITG,
    Goose

  • Discount coupons – from Safety Valve

    Today there was no theme. Tough Tuesday was the theme. Thats it, so let’s get to work.

    Battan death march – 1 mile Indian run around Rich mans loop with last person dropping off and completing 5 burpees

    Stopped at the bumper to grab some coupons to complete a 7 of diamonds around the stage loop:
    First corner: 7 man makers
    Second corner: 7 man makers, 14 merkins with block
    Third corner: 7 man makers, 14 merkins with block, 21 curls
    Fourth corner: 7 man makers, 14 merkins, 21 curls, 28 goblet squats

    11s – jump squats and curls

    Finished with 2 minutes of Mary – LBCs and 6 inch hold. COT, intentions, and prayers sent out. Thank you for the opportunity to lead.

    Welcome back Goose! In your absence we have gotten soft. We thought we were doing so good until you show up after a month of being on IR and make everyone look bad. In all seriousness, you killed it today just like you always have. Happy to have Father Goose back!

  • Choose your Poi, Son! – from America’s Best

    Unbeknownst to many, YHC spent his small kid time in Hawaii… AB was just a barefoot Haole, speaking pidgin, surfing with an alien I thought was a dog, working as a private investigator, and flying around in T.C.’s helicopter. This beatdown was inspired by those days. . .

    The PAX rolled in, totaling a dozen by the time Dilly rolled on… so we began Warmarama… a bit of a pickle since we only had 10 coupons. But, like a glorious Chesapeake Bay Retriever, Paradox broke out of the circle, leapt out in to the gloom, and returned with a giant black stick that would have to suffice.

    Island 1: Hawai’i (The Big Island):

    Constantly in fear that a volcano was about to erupt, YHC’s early visits to this island were always a bit nightmarish. We pay tribute today to this childhood fear with Volcano by the late, some-say-great, Jimmy Buffet. Hold Al Gore. Burpee on “I don’t know.” Tuck jump on “Volcano.”

    Mom Jeans’ hatred of Jimmy Buffet during this segment was noted, catalogued, and will be weaponized in a future beatdown.

    Island 2: Maui – the Man, the Myth, the Island

    The trickster demigod was definitely present during this well-planned, expertly explained, and piss-poorly executed portion of your entertainment.
    The plan was a Kola (which is the closest phonetic match to Dora, since there is no “D” or “R” in the Hawaiian alphabet). Pair up, one partner is Maui, pushing up the sky (coupon presses) while the other is his brother, tricked into pulling up islands from the sea floor(moving coupons). Then Flapjack, and 2nd partner takes over the presses while partner 1 moves the coupon back to the start. The explanation was much longer, murkier, and nobody in the PAX was clear on whether they were Maui, his brother, or themselves, so everyone was moving islands all over the ocean.

    Admittedly, this part was half-baked at best. And so YHC went into full-on Dad/Tech Support mode (“Move!”) and just walked everyone through a new version: Walk backwards, with alternating sets of curls and goblet squats. A more well-planned Maui beatdown is guaranteed next time.

    Island 3: O’ahu… choose your Poi, son!

    One of my earliest memories was at a luau, learning about poi, a Hawaiian food staple. Hard to describe, it’s a fermented paste of pounded taro root. It’s like if yogurt and sweet potato had a baby. And then you ate out of that baby’s diaper.
    Anyway, you typically classify it based on consistency: “one-finger”, “two-finger”, or “three-finger”, based on how many fingers are required to scoop it up.
    So here, participants are asked to choose which poi they want. And like poi, with each added finger it gets more runny:
    1-finger poi: Roll die, do 7x that many burpees and WWII sit-ups, with murder bunnying and bear crawling (least runny/no running)
    2-finger poi: Roll die, do that many laps with 2x that number of blockees as buy-in for each lap
    3-finger poi: Run/nur until you find the Run-Cajun-Run sticker on a lamp post; then 3 burpees and run back (most runny)

    Without hesitation, Honeysuckle chose 3 and lead the other gazelles off into the unknown gloom.
    Seeming the most innocuous, 2-finger poi proved to be the most difficult. Those were the real tough guys. . .who didn’t do the math first.
    Enron and YHC were the only two bold enough to try the 1 finger poi, and were rewarded for our bravery by finishing first.

    Final Thang: The Ring of Fire
    The Ring of Fire is also a belt of volcanos surrounding the Pacific. So we did the typical Ring of Fire, but (Inner) “Circles” by Soul Coughing was played instead of the usual Johnny Cash song…
    About 2 minutes into the ‘roid rage, YHC offered to stop the thang if anyone could ID the artist… and decided to mention “this is a 10-minute song, by the way.”
    Only Popeye had even heard this song before. And so, a minute later, desperation set in, and Yankee Jeaux jumped up to check the phone and call out the artist to stop the torture.
    The song was over anyway. YJ cheated, but YHC lied.

    Pau.
    COT and Yankee Jeaux prayed us out.

    Something for my Llamas:
    Nobody knew why that song by the Animals was played this morning amongst the Hawaii-themed music. YHC’s favorite volcano is Haleakala… which is Hawaiian for “House of the (rising) Sun.”
    Another bit of trivia for you: The Hawaiian Islands were once called the Sandwich Islands, but the name was changed because it brought too much shame when Firehouse Subs was founded.

    Tanks for coming out, bruddahs. Always an honor to lead. Great seeing the consistency of White Meat (that sounds weird) and that Ponzi is posting again on the regular. And some guy named Wilford Montana made my day by showing up (sans coffee) to join us.

    SYITG,

    AB

  • DJ DOD Volume 4: Greatest Hits – from Paradox

    “Shouldn’t they teach that in school?!”

    It’s the conversation you’ve all had with friends or family and many topics can go into the open blank.

    Taxes, tire changes, bonnie blair’s..you name it, there’s somethings we would all add to the formation of our youth. We can all see the value of teaching and learning everyday life skills at the peak age of brain elasticity and thats where my newest form of learning comes in. The ultra secret 3-man groupme trivia league?! No..sorry, I’ve sworn an oath not to discuss that publicly and some hearts just aren’t ready to talk about it. What I’m referring to is my degree from the streetz. For the last 2 years I’ve been auditing classes from Dr. Jeauxs FLEX MBA (major ballin assets). No classroom for this stuff, you just have to be in close proximity and absorb these little wisdom nuggets . This semester we have really been diving deep into some great discussions in SELF PROMOTION SYSTEMS 5000. As we’ve seen from French Horn TMZ videos and from his own monologues this man can flat out teach. I’ve learned two major rules of the road from his mastery during BEATDOWN FRANCHISES 800 this semester.

    #1 Standardized production. Like watching Dilly bomb a drive 225 every single swing, the customer craves to know that the product will be the same repeatable quality. Why is the line always 20 deep at canes. You know the sauce is waiting and the caniac hasn’t changed!

    #2 Brand Recognition. Let the customer take solace in knowing the product is there for them. When you see the McD’s arch you don’t think about processed chemicals, just the taste of awesome fries. And when you see the DJ/card dealer gifs hit the groupme at 9pm the back of the brain says there will be pain but other guy in the midbrain with the mullet says you should totes NOT miss brah!!

    So when YHC was determining a suitable theme for a Tuesday Tuff with multiple pax (yhc included) in the walking dead category it was only right to return to the GREATEST HITS. YHC dialed up Ronnie over at Bayou Lafource Studios (yo dis P..who dis?) and his schedule was wide open for a pitt boss gig. With increasing franchise success, we would use the professor’s rules to keep the production the same great quality you all know and love but sprinkle in a little “fan servicing” (heck, it works for Disney) with previous hits and limited running for joint preservation.

    DUKE! Get the cards, its DJ DOD VOLUME 4 !! Roll the beautiful footage!

    Warmup
    YHC rolled in hot after a failed attempt at Pope pickup but just in time to give a disclaimer for a mystery FNG! We got in the usuals with a bumper mosey that was eerily quiet as pax waited to see if this was a precursor for more running. It was the only .25 we attempted.

    A round of 21s followed just to make sure YHC had the pax full attention and several infractions led to 10 OYO burpees.

    THA THANG

    FORMAT: DJ (songs w/ triggers) followed by DOD- Ronnie Picks the game (blackjack, battle, poker etc)

    If you ‘re keeping track at home the previous 3 installments were:

    DJ DOD
    DJ DOD Volume 2: She’s A Brick House
    DJ DOD Volume 3: Fat Tuesday Tuff

    YHC hand selected a tune from each for todays Greatest Hits montage, mostly the ones that elicited the highest mix of grumbling and muscle growth.

    Round 1:
    Hey Ya- OutKast
    Coupons Side Shuffles on song with thrusters on Hey (down) Ya (up)
    This was a heater early but you know the Ole baseball trick, First pitch is always an inside the plate fastball to give the catcher some space to operate.

    DOD: High Card- Derkins, Chuck Norris Merkins, Freak Nastys (dips)

    I’d like to issue a formal apology for Valve and Jeaux who were the only attendees to survive this unlucky draw AND Gooses 70,000 merkin beatdown on Monday. T-claps.

    Round 2:
    Whip and Nae Nae from Silento
    Hold plank on song
    Merkins on Whip
    Side Reach on Nae Nae
    Leg raise on Stanky Leg
    MC on Break Yo leg
    **Editors Note- Need an exercise for “Bop”

    DOD: LBCs, Carolina Dry Docks, Bulgarian Split Squats

    Round 3
    “Ring of Fire” Johnny Cash
    Bearcrawls around Picnic table- Merkins on Fire
    Reports from Ponzi post beatdown of a lifelong cure of hemorrhoids just by realizing the true meaning of the song.

    DOD black jack: Leg Raises, Bonnie Blairs

    Round 4- a “bonus track” on the greatest hits album to make sure they come back hungry

    Destinys Child “Say My Name”
    Coupon High Knees- Coupon Curls on “Name”

    Wrap up with a traditional DJ DOD burnout song
    Calvin Harris – Too Close
    Freddy Mercuries till 6 am

    Counting, Naming and…AN FNG

    Our mystery FNG revealed himself as the cousin of NOLA’s Reluctant Yankee
    He was part of the amazing hosting team for the IOAM and came to see what the fuss was about.
    With great deliberation we landed on a combination of his address and hobbies with …WHITE MEAT
    Welcome man, Solid work and looking forward to seeing your progress out here.

    Prayer with solid Intentions as we continue through Lent with many ill and traveling.

    Thank you all for participating in the latest edition of DJ DOD, like any great temporary product (I see you McRib), it will return… when you least expect it but when you need it the most.

    It’s a privilege to lead.

    SYITG
    Paradox

  • Fat Tuesday Tuff- Volume 2: Texaco Cat has Unfinished Business – from Paradox

    “What is a Mardi Gras?” YHC asked. Standing in the playground of Homer Elementary , YHC was at that tender age of naivety when it seems coaches have all the answers to life’s questions. My PE coach cinched up his grey Riddell shorts (you know the ones) around a considerable beer gut and confidently informed me:

    “ Yea Owens, well it’s pretty much a bunch of idiots get drunk and dress up like fools with their friends then give up bread or something ….why don’t you go cover first base and maybe ask your parents”

    9 year old YHC trotted out to first base safely tucking Mardi Gras into my “Bobby Bouche: Things That are the Devil” folder, right beside football, MTV and any activities after 8pm.
    Thankfully it didn’t stay tucked away for long as God put YHC on a path towards south La and I would soon be in a free men’s workout group where the chatter de jour was usually “how to say pirogue” or “whether potato salad and gumbo should ever touch each other”. It’s one of the many fine attributes of this thing we call F3, somedays my virgin ears hear Depeche Mode and can never regain innocence and others days if I’m the lucky downwind pax, I get a fartlek taste in the air of last night’s Cajun cuisine. So, todays beatdown would be a wild hodge-podge of Mardi Gras learned, observed and practiced from a North La transplant.

    LEGAL DISCLAIMER: In the court case filed as Mr. Ronnie Lillickk vs the Pax of F3 Thibodaux the ruling of the jury was that YHCs north La version of Mardi Gras does not represent all North La transplants. Furthermore, there are many fine intelligent people form this part of the state.

    Duke! I know you are the King of Barkus this year but you still have to roll the beautiful footage!!

    Warmup
    YHC moseyed in from deep Richman territory adorned in only the finest cheap plastic gadgetry that Houma CVS could offer. Running right into a welcome sight of none other than Tidy Whitey!! He got a few highlighter stick pops as penance for 500 plus missed beatdowns but was welcomed back with much hoopla and praise! With 8 more pax ready to roll we got down to business with the usuals as YHCs outfit could not withstand even a few SSHs, one hates to see it. A bumper/stop sign mosey was in order to get the legs pumping and begin racking up some RCR miles.

    THANG 1
    Mardi Gras Mambo –The Meters

    Traditional F3 Thibodaux style with Merkins on Mambo and Donkey Kicks on “Down in New Orleans”. This song goes down in F3 Thib lore. In its debut the line “it takes a cool cat to blow a horn” was translated (by YHCS caffeine riddled brain) into “Texaco Cat blows a horn” and the legend of Texaco Cat still lives on . YHC has always imagined Texaco Cat as a north La gas station attendant that’s strong as an ox, knows his rights and has a bumper sticker on his hemi Dodge Ram that says “kids who fish and hunt don’t steal and deal”.

    YHC gave the disclaimer that proper form would be observed and rewarded. Yankee Jeaux was locked in early and often in this beatdown and took the merkin form title easily. He was then granted the Tutu of Power and the Flashing Stick of Trust to lead us as the Grand Merkin Marshal in an Indian Run Parade with 3 drop off LBCs ( ya gotta find dat baby in da king cake shah! Piyyyyahhhh)

    Onward to the beginning of Richmans loop for “Throw me something Mister”, originating from a younger ignorant YHC speculating that maybe all those cajuns are just angrily throwing stuff around because they got all them teeth and no teethbrush (ok I’ve reached my second Waterboy reference and I promise that’s it)

    PAX partnered up with a goal of transporting both pax and 1 tennis ball to the far corner of RL. Mode of transport was mosey then catch a “throw” from your partner. Rinse and repeat with 3 “Hi 5” burpee penalty for a drop. Ended up in a two horse race with Goose/Cuz vs YJ/AB enjoying a reduced burpee penalty at the finish line. The rest of the us enjoying a 10 burpee appetizer.

    THANG 2

    Next up Mardi Gras Trivia to represent YHCs schooling years when I began to figure out the Rubiks cube holiday of mardi gras and Lent.

    Correct Answer- run/nur 1/2 road to port a jeaux
    Incorrect – run /nur full road to cones and back

    1-Name all three states in which Fat Tuesday is recognized as a State Holiday.
    ANSWER: LA, AL, FL- With a little prodding we got this correct.

    **LEGAL DISCLAIMER: In the case of Mr./Future Dr. Maught vs the people of Florida the jury has come to a decision that he was in fact “not raised here” but does at times display Floridian characteristics and is able to leverage their politicians for social media clout.

    2-Carnival comes from the Latin phrase Carne Vale meaning what?
    ANSWER: Farewell to Meat – YHC was feeling gracious after those penalty burpees and helped a bit on this one.

    3- This on screen Batman served as King Bachus?
    Michael Keaton was correct with a surprising lack of controversy that Michael Keaton was the GOAT on screen Batman. YHC was ready for a good ole donnybrook if anyone said the word Clooney.

    4- New Orleans cancelled Mardi Gras parades in 1870 due to an outbreak of this disease?
    ANSWER: Yellow fever – Correct and a very safe guess for any illness before the 20th century.

    5- Krewe of Zulu tosses what coveted Mardi Gras trinket during the parade each year?
    “Coconut” was immediately given as an answer then contested that this was incomplete and YHCs brief internet research led him to believe it was only GOLD coconuts. YHC will now award post beatdown points that this was acceptable and letters of condolence have been sent to all who ran that extra eighth of a mile.

    THANG 3

    Only in the last 3 years has YHC come to fully appreciate Mardi Gras as part of the yearly feast before we begin our Lenten fasting. After some exicon research YHC found the Cooper to be a great representation of contrasted feast/fast with some potential RCR mileage sprinkled in .
    The (mini and abbreviated ) Cooper
    *editors note- a full Cooper is 10 merkins, squats, burpees with a quarter mile run in between each round
    Fast- Run 1/4 Mile (alley/straight away/alley and back )
    Feast – 7merkins , 7burpees, 7 squats

    The crew got about 3 rounds into this before YHC realized we were a touch behind schedule and called an Omaha at the line. We finished the 5 rep and 3 rep rounds at the corners of the loop then sprinted for home.

    Counting, naming and welcoming the prodigal Tighty Whitey return!

    InVESTment given to Cuz for his willingness to wear a hat and play the part of “that guy at the parade that bases his whole life on defending Bud Light”.

    COT and Cuz prayed us out

    Grateful to show up each day and improve the mind , body, and spirit with you fellas.

    See you in the Gloom

    Paradox

  • The Alphabet Marathon – from Enron

    In preparation for this morning’s beatdown, YHC had the task of coming up with something that would incorporate enough running to be effective for Run Cajun Run milage, as well as keep the PAX’s minds off previously mentioned running. A few months back an idea to go through the alphabet with various exercises had arisen and YHC thought this might be the perfect opportunity to put it in place.

    10 strong staggered in on a chilly morning at the Stage only to be greeted by a couple children’s drawing books laid out on the concrete. On those two books were the letters of the alphabet with corresponding exercises written on them. Naturally, that sparked a little bit of chatter only to be stopped by circling up that PAX to start the warmup.

    Warmarama:
    SSH, WM, Willie Mays Hayes, AC, Cherry Pickers, Self-Love, IW
    The 1 and Only Thang:
    The Alphabet Marathon

    Attention was drawn to the drawing boards where the letters of the alphabet were written, next to each letter was a corresponding exercise. The instructions were to perform 30 of each exercise (30 seconds of some), then run a lap around the stage after each letter’s exercise was complete. The lap is .12 miles, meaning that if the entire alphabet was completed, that PAX would have run 3.12 miles.
    The letters and exercises were as follows:
    A- American Hammers
    B- Big Boy Sit Ups – This was a last-minute decision to scratch burpees off the list. A gracious Q indeed.
    C- Coupon Curls
    D- Dips
    E- Elbow Plank (30 seconds)
    F- Flutter Kicks (2=1)
    G- Gore (Al) (30 seconds)
    H- Humpers (Monkey)
    I- Imperial Walkers
    J- J-Lo’s
    K- Kettlebell Swings
    L- Lunges 1=1
    M- Merkins
    N- No’s(Oh) – Somehow almost forgot this letter
    O- Overhead Press
    P- Pickle Pounders
    Q- Q’s Choice – This ended up being LBCs
    R- Reverse Crunches
    S- Side Straddle Hops
    T- Toy Soldiers
    U- Up Straddle Hops – A 1 legged Side Straddle hop which made for an interesting sight
    V- V-Ups
    W- World War 1 Sit ups
    X- X-Wings
    Y- Yul Brynner’s
    Z- Zombie Crunches

    Prior to this morning, YHCs belief was that none of the PAX would be close to completion of the alphabet. This assumption was incorrect as Goose, Pope, and Honeysuckle, were very close to completion with only the letter Z left to complete when “recover” was called. Also, there were many other of the group that were very close behind. This may be one that has a redo to see where progress is made.
    Great work by all this morning. The variation was enjoyed and the milage still abundant. Always great to continue to push ourselves with this crew.
    Announcements and the inVESTment was passed from Honeysuckle to Goose
    COT and Paradox prayed us out.

    SYITG,

    Enron

  • Free Solo 2: Struggler’s Run – from America’s Best

    YHC pulled up at least 7 or 8 minutes early to find overly-zealous Enron and Paradox at the Stage, arriving early to gossip. The rest of the PAX poured in, slowly, gradually, like some sort of sweet viscous substance…

    Warmarama – typical SSH, toy soldiers, windmills, arm circles, then a curve ball… butt-kicks straight into high knees? For some men, the muscle memory kicked in, and the knees went up before the brains even knew what was happening. Overall, there seemed to be a very mixed reaction to this, and YHC was afraid for a moment there may be a Q coup.

    Pre-thang:
    Last time YHC put on a “Free Solo” beatdown, we had extra time and went into an OT “make it stop” name that tune-athon. Due to this, and with RCR coming up, YHC decided to start this one with a run.
    Indian Run while the Wu-Thang plunked out music of mostly bands with misleading names. The goal is to guess how many band members are in said band. The difference between your guess and the actual is the number of exercises we do at each stop.
    Popeye impressed, calling out Arcade Fire immediately, and them even more impressively, MJ knew (or guessed?) that there were 5 members. No extra work!
    The Thompson Twins were next, and of course the trick was that there are 3 members, but we only had to do one merkin, as Wet Tap was called upon and (understandably) guessed 2.
    Next we nurred, as a hint, hoping someone could guess “Feels like we Only Go Backwards” by Tame Impala. The guess was 4, but there is only one member in this “band.” We did 3 BBS.
    The next was my favorite, and it was even better because we had already done BBS and merkins, so the next had to be burpees. Nobody knew the Polyphonic Spree song (also titled “Hold Me Now”) so our buy in was 5 burpees.
    Pope was called upon to be the scapegoat (by the way, the person who was randomly chosen to guess each time was the person who happened to stop closest to the streetlight).
    Pope guessed 5 (I think, or 8), but there are 27 members of this ridiculous band, so either way it was Samsonite. So we did a lot of burpees.
    Goose nailed Bungle in the Jungle by Jethro Tull, and someone (Enron) knew there were 4 members. No extra work. Honeysuckle called Superman by Five for Fighting, but Dox thought there were most likely 5 members of this one-man band.

    Back at the start for the Real Thang: FREE SOLO 2
    The Rules: A solo from a song is played while we all do some kind of work. The song is curated for a single individual in the attending PAX. 3 things with slightly different results occur:
    1. The person for whom the song was chosen IDs the song. Result= all PAX bear crawl 20 yards “free” of gear (coupon), then lunge walk back. Everyone takes “victory lap.”
    2. Some other dude identifies the song, freeing himself from the burden of the coupon. Everyone else block-bears up and lunge-walks with coupon back. Dude takes a victory lap while rest of PAX continues work.
    3. Nobody IDs the song everyone murder-bunnies up, and rifle carries back, then does “sprint of defeat” to flag and back

    As we began, Wet Tap busted out of the gates like a thing that busts out of gates busting out of a gate.
    He ID’d the first two songs without even knowing what was happening, stealing Dox’s and Pope’s songs as well as Pope’s thunder. And he took 2 victory laps in a row while we continued the work.
    Popeye’s musical chops impressed again, identifying his solo from “When Doves Cry.”
    YHC was downright giddy when he saw Goldilox pull in this morning… I’ve been waiting to play this smooth jazz sax solo from “Too Hot.” Nobody knew the song… I guess all these Millennials think “Kool and the Gang” is just something Samuel L. Jackson said. (And in case you missed it, “too hot” is something Goldilocks said).
    Enron ID’d “Money” but YHC suspects fowl play. No, not foul.
    “Honeybee” Tom Petty. Nobody knows that old fart, apparently.
    For the fledgling pilot, “Learning to Fly.” Again. Free Solo 1 brought us this song by old fart Tom Petty. This time, same title, different song, different band. Nobody knew it.
    Overall, I know, too much Pink Floyd.
    Evident next during what is arguably one of the best and most recognizable guitar solos ever. As we did thrusters, Goose prodded Wet Tap to ID “Comfortably Numb.”
    Tap’s response: “I’d rather just keep doing Thrusters.”
    (Time ran out before Dilly’s and MJ’s songs could be unveiled… to be concluded)

    COT: Count-o-rama, Name-o-rama,

    Animal was bestowed upon Picadilly.

    Honey-o-rama courtesy of The Beekeeper (aka Honeysuckle)

    Thanks for putting up with my nonsense once again, fellas.

    SYITG,
    AB

  • Free Solo 2: Struggler’s Run – from America’s Best

    YHC pulled up at least 7 or 8 minutes early to find overly-zealous Enron and Paradox at the Stage, arriving early to gossip. The rest of the PAX poured in, slowly, gradually, like some sort of sweet viscous substance…

    Warmarama – typical SSH, toy soldiers, windmills, arm circles, then a curve ball… butt-kicks straight into high knees? For some men, the muscle memory kicked in, and the knees went up before the brains even knew what was happening. Overall, there seemed to be a very mixed reaction to this, and YHC was afraid for a moment there may be a Q coup.

    Pre-thang:
    Last time YHC put on a “Free Solo” beatdown, we had extra time and went into an OT “make it stop” name that tune-athon. Due to this, and with RCR coming up, YHC decided to start this one with a run.
    Indian Run while the Wu-Thang plunked out music of mostly bands with misleading names. The goal is to guess how many band members are in said band. The difference between your guess and the actual is the number of exercises we do at each stop.
    Popeye impressed, calling out Arcade Fire immediately, and them even more impressively, MJ knew (or guessed?) that there were 5 members. No extra work!
    The Thompson Twins were next, and of course the trick was that there are 3 members, but we only had to do one merkin, as Wet Tap was called upon and (understandably) guessed 2.
    Next we nurred, as a hint, hoping someone could guess “Feels like we Only Go Backwards” by Tame Impala. The guess was 4, but there is only one member in this “band.” We did 3 BBS.
    The next was my favorite, and it was even better because we had already done BBS and merkins, so the next had to be burpees. Nobody knew the Polyphonic Spree song (also titled “Hold Me Now”) so our buy in was 5 burpees.
    Pope was called upon to be the scapegoat (by the way, the person who was randomly chosen to guess each time was the person who happened to stop closest to the streetlight).
    Pope guessed 5 (I think, or 8), but there are 27 members of this ridiculous band, so either way it was Samsonite. So we did a lot of burpees.
    Goose nailed Bungle in the Jungle by Jethro Tull, and someone (Enron) knew there were 4 members. No extra work. Honeysuckle called Superman by Five for Fighting, but Dox thought there were most likely 5 members of this one-man band.

    Back at the start for the Real Thang: FREE SOLO 2
    The Rules: A solo from a song is played while we all do some kind of work. The song is curated for a single individual in the attending PAX. 3 things with slightly different results occur:
    1. The person for whom the song was chosen IDs the song. Result= all PAX bear crawl 20 yards “free” of gear (coupon), then lunge walk back. Everyone takes “victory lap.”
    2. Some other dude identifies the song, freeing himself from the burden of the coupon. Everyone else block-bears up and lunge-walks with coupon back. Dude takes a victory lap while rest of PAX continues work.
    3. Nobody IDs the song everyone murder-bunnies up, and rifle carries back, then does “sprint of defeat” to flag and back

    As we began, Wet Tap busted out of the gates like a thing that busts out of gates busting out of a gate.
    He ID’d the first two songs without even knowing what was happening, stealing Dox’s and Pope’s songs as well as Pope’s thunder. And he took 2 victory laps in a row while we continued the work.
    Popeye’s musical chops impressed again, identifying his solo from “When Doves Cry.”
    YHC was downright giddy when he saw Goldilox pull in this morning… I’ve been waiting to play this smooth jazz sax solo from “Too Hot.” Nobody knew the song… I guess all these Millennials think “Kool and the Gang” is just something Samuel L. Jackson said. (And in case you missed it, “too hot” is something Goldilocks said).
    Enron ID’d “Money” but YHC suspects fowl play. No, not foul.
    “Honeybee” Tom Petty. Nobody knows that old fart, apparently.
    For the fledgling pilot, “Learning to Fly.” Again. Free Solo 1 brought us this song by old fart Tom Petty. This time, same title, different song, different band. Nobody knew it.
    Overall, I know, too much Pink Floyd.
    Evident next during what is arguably one of the best and most recognizable guitar solos ever. As we did thrusters, Goose prodded Wet Tap to ID “Comfortably Numb.”
    Tap’s response: “I’d rather just keep doing Thrusters.”
    (Time ran out before Dilly’s and MJ’s songs could be unveiled… to be concluded)

    COT: Count-o-rama, Name-o-rama,

    Animal was bestowed upon Picadilly.

    Honey-o-rama courtesy of The Beekeeper (aka Honeysuckle)

    Thanks for putting up with my nonsense once again, fellas.

    SYITG,
    AB

  • Every Morning in Africa… – from Paradox

    “Every morning in Africa a gazelle wakes up and knows it must be faster than the fastest lion or it will be killed.
    Every morning in Africa a lion wakes up and knows it must be faster than the slowest gazelle or it will starve.
    It doesn’t matter whether you are a lion or a gazelle, when the sun comes up you better be running “
    -African proverb

    Todays beatdown inspiration was a bit of a “give a mouse a cookie” situation. YHC recently saw the above quote and tucked it away into the “beatdown ingredient “folder for later. Shortly after that YHC read a Nola backblast (shoutout to Charmin) with a “catch me if you can” modification called lions and gazelles. Shortly after THAT Gooses new years beatdown had pax 1 mile run times posted and YHC wondered what type of burpee handicap would put the pax on an equal running field. The blend was coming together, was just missing another ingredient when I saw my 2.0s running scared in the yard…hmmm….a dash of fear…just right! Now just need a heat source to cook this meal …or perhaps …perhaps this is a dish best served cold…

    Duke!! Get away from that watering hole and roll that beautiful beatdown footage!

    7 pax fought through icy windshields and hastily searched pants drawers to get better on a Tuesday Tuff at the stage. 25 degrees at alarm time with 15 mph wind puts us at a respectable F3 nation GMI of 14 (32-current degree F plus PAX attendance). We felt the kindred spirit with our F3 brothers in the northeast and midwest that call this weather “spring” .

    YHC started the partner work early at home when attempting to unfreeze the truck too late but Valve was ready and waiting with the cutting-edge Ford technology across the street so we headed down 308 together silently waiting to see if Yankee ever found pants. Team Platinum soon found Goose and Ronnie (with leg coverings!) loitering in the cold with Jeaux and Popeye close behind.
    Today’s goals were simple. Never stop moving and get the pax home with all their fingers and toes and wives leggings intact.

    Warmup
    Heavy Cardio warmup with a double dose of MCs to get the heart charged and blood to the fingers if only for a second.

    Continued Warmup
    Indian Run around Richmans Loop to let the pax see the Serengeti and prime the watering holes (drop off cones)
    Drop off to 3 Jillian Michael’s (haven’t missed those)

    YHC tried to find the song that would transport the pax to a sunny tropical state of mind so we ran while the Beach Boys told us about a place way down in Kokomo. This served to warm our hearts for about 2 seconds until turning the corner on the flat land of richmans loop and feeling the full force of the wind. We did not get there fast or take it slow and the Beach Boys would be ashamed but we did end up where we wanted to go and picked up a wild Dilly while out in the bush!

    Da Main Thang a Lang

    LIONS VS GAZELLES

    Da Rules:
    -Lion starts by doing 15 burpees while gazelles take off from starting line
    -Gazelles must do assigned exercise and reps at each “watering holes” before progressing
    -the lion can kill (tag) you at any time and is immune from watering hole exercises
    -You can only run forward
    -Pax must stay on the road
    -When tagged you are “dead “, complete 10 burpees and mosey back to starting line
    -if you make it back “home” no penalty
    -The lion will do 2 penalty burpees for every living gazelle who makes it home.

    Round 1
    Lion Goose vs Gazelle PAX—Score: Goose 6 Gazelles 0
    Gazelles made a respectable trek to in between the second and third watering hole before Lion Goose unleashed carnage. The ever cunning strategist Lion Goose ran down the leaders in cold blood then circled back for the rest. I shudder to think what Pope will do in this format.

    Round 2
    Lion Jeaux vs Gazelle PAX- Score Jeax 1 Gazelles 5
    Only change is 10 merkins which in Jeaux’s defense went much quicker than YHC expected and may have put us ahead early. Most of the gazelles made it home to their families. Lion Jeaux did not starve but later commented that the Gazelle Dilly was “a little gamey” for him. Sadly there will be a zoo truck coming soon to “transfer him to a better place”.

    Round 3
    Lion Popeye vs Gazelle PAX- Score Pop 6 Gazelles 0
    12 Burpees for the Lion this round to start, 5 Jump Squats at watering holes.
    Lion runs forward while pax Nur and stare down our impending death. YHC tilted this one a touch in the favor of the Lion to ensure maximum effort. The nur/jump squat combo took the gazelles down fast and Popeye came around the first bend of Richmans loop like a persistent tank rolling down gazelles with reckless abandon. He took YHC and Goose just after cone 2 with a gentle tap that and nod that it was time death and for more burpees.

    Round 4 – Partner race for home
    P1 sprint to next light and MC
    P2 MC till p1 is stopped at next light
    YHC sowed some confusion early by saying leap frog but performing something different. The pax adjusted well and every team stayed in close contention.

    Formed up to finish a standard Indian run home with a sprint finish

    Just enough time for a little Proud Mary, this is an old Goose classic and never gets old
    Assorted abs on the song with Big Boys on “Rolling”.

    Just before the song we realized the wind had taken down Ole Glory on our shovel flag. Goose fiddled with putting it back together but he is not one to miss a session of Mary so he resolutely held the stars and stripes up and off the ground while torching abdominals down below. Never been prouder of my site Q.

    The Counting, the Naming and we found ANIMAL inside of the seventeenth layer of YJs clothes. It was given to Pop in honor of his Gazelle feast in round 3.

    Announcements:
    RCR sign ups and prep
    It’s Only a Mile – Feb 17th

    COT and Ronnie prayed us out

    Moleskin:
    We can be motivated, at least temporarily, by many things.
    There can be comfort (Kokomo in 25 degrees weather), control (how many reps?), fear (is that Popeye or the grim reaper?). These are mostly internal motivations that we reach for in the face of adversity. But what the pax of F3 Thibodaux consistently teach YHC is the value of an external motivation. One detached from my own needs and desires. Reaching outside of oneself for your children, your spouse or just that sweaty dude next to you who keeps making 3 inches jokes. When we find this extra gear of shared suffering it’s amazing to see the reservoir of strength that God provides with it.
    Thanks for the effort despite the brutal condition’s today men.

    It’s a privilege to lead

    Epilogue

    Every morning in Thibodaux the Gloom awaits men knowing it will capture many with struggle and snares.
    Every morning in Thibodaux the pax wake up knowing they must work hard to beat the gloom.
    And that when the sun rises, there will be men at his side, pushing to make each other a little better each day.

    SYITG
    Dox