With a forecast of cold temps, high winds, and rain, YHC was prepared to unleash an epic beatdown under the covered, outdoor stage at Popeyes. As luck would have it, the rain was over by 0530. Two Yutes was brave enough to battle the elements. We elected to modify to a two-mile B.L.I.M.P.S., which allowed YHC to get his daughter to school early, as she requested, to prepare for exams.
After a quick warm up of 20 SSH and the required five burpees, we were off. We stopped randomly to complete the L.I.M.P., which YHC did out of order for some reason. Back to the flag and completed the S.
COT: Name-o-rama, announcements, and prayers of gratitude. Thank you Two Yutes for braving the elements and the friendly conversation. PAX expect to see that epic beatdown in the future. It’s packed full of fun and games!
I wondered how many people would show up after the F3 Christmas Party, but around 5:28 several figures emerged through the humid, warm fog and after a quick disclaimer off we went.
Into Audubon Park for a quick warm-up on the track: SSH, IW, Squats, Peter Parker, Mountain Climbers, Merkins
Run track to Drew Brees Playground for circuit #1
Ab extensions on the swings x10
Diamonds x10
Jump squats x10
LBC x20
X3 rounds
Back to the track and run full loop of the park, around to playground at Expo/St Charles, picking up Crimson from F3 Carpex who had looped in with our local FiA contingent
Circuit #2 at Playground:
Merkins on balance swing/surf thing x10
Split-arm Pull ups x10
Derkins on swing x10
X3 rounds
Across St Charles and over to WPM
Run up to the top of Wolfpack Mountain with 5 merkins at each end (10 merks/floor – 7 floors)
Back down stairs and back to COT
Summary:
3.5 miles
180 merkins/variants
Creative use of playgrounds
On our dark run around the park, we passed many a runner and frightened dog walker until one group yelled out “hey, are you F3?” Why yes ma’am, we are! Our F3 brother from Raleigh/Carpex, Crimson, had arrived late and in a new town, standing outside a dark park without any sense of where might be, he’d looped in with a couple of lovelies from FiA and was enjoying a nice morning jog. He joined up and we kept at it. We kept up the pace today and covered some ground – strong work from everyone.
This post comes later than it should have. And based off the title of this post you would think that would mean that you will get something extra special from reading this. Instead, today you will learn another valuable lesson. That is, don’t believe everything you read on the interwebs.
So rather than a profound life changing backblast, I leave you with simply the details of the beat down. Enjoy!
Warmup
SSH in cadence, windmills IC, High knees IC, shoulder warmup IC
The Thang
Grabbed some cinderblocks for the beat down, and started off with some colt 45s, and followed that with blocktanamo.
Blocktonamo: PAX, in a circle, hold standard 8x8x16 concrete blocks straight out in front of them while one PAX sets down his block to run inside the circle pressing down on the others blocks. The next PAX sets his block down as soon as the guy next to him is on the move. Ends when the final PAX completes his lap. Works both clockwise and counterclockwise. A modified version of a PAX favorite, Guantanamo.
We grabbed our blocks and went to the justice center for bear and blocks.
Bear and blocks: Get on all fours (like you are doing a bear crawl) with your Cinder Block on the grass between your knees or feet. Reach between your legs and pull the Block across the grass passed your head. Now, bear crawl forward until the Block is between your feet again, and keep repeating across the length of the field.
We did some quick core and went to the top of the parking garage (did a lunge walk up the first ramp) for our last item. Two rounds of high fives.
High fives: Round 1: 1 Manmaker, up the ramp and back down. Ascend until you’ve reached five reps. Rinsed and repeated with American Hammers for round 2.
Walked back to the flag where some interesting theories were tossed around about the origins of the lady in the car in the garage. The great unsolved mystery. Who is she, why is she there so early, is she a spy filming F3 for a potential Russian invasion?!?! I guess we’ll never know, but its fun to speculate. But yeah, she’s a spy.
Gentlemen, tis the holiday season, and we all know what that means; Burpee Claus is coming to town! So in honor of Burpee Claus and everything that he stands for (which is doing burpees), we did a traditional 6-10 Stomp this morning using the traditional Stomp route: the PAX ran for 6 minutes, then did 10 burpees for 1 minute (we did this 6 times, and then ultimately met back at the flag).
T-claps to Hawg, Rev & War Eagle for running to the workout from Hawg’s house. I think they also aspired to run back to Hawg’s house as well once the beatdown was over, so they probably each logged 10+ miles this morning. T-claps also to Puddles, Amnesty’s dog, for joining us for the run.
Once the beatdown was over, we did the count-off, name-o-rama, announcements, intentions & prayer. During announcements, Amnesty mentioned that he has a keg of F3 beer & that he will send some info out on Mumblechatter to let the PAX know when/where to meet if they would like to sample it. Mayhem & Holy Grove both had prayer intentions, so we concluded by lifting up their intentions, lifting up the unspoken intentions & then ultimately thanking the Sky Q for another day of F3 exercise & fellowship. Thanks for the opportunity to lead, fellas. I always enjoy it.
YHC arrived to a festively lit Grandmother’s House to find the likes of Hammer, Steve, and Garfield (the latter whom took off with some of his running peeps). John (EH of Goose) pulled up to join us for the 1st time, Pelican, as is his tendency, walked up seemingly out of nowhere, and Cowbell, as is very much HIS tendency, pulled up after we got started.
WARM O RAMA
Waiting for Cowebell to emerge from his truck…
10xs High Knees, Butt Kicks
And as soon as he graced us with his presence…
10 Burpees OYO
3 Laps up and down the stairs
20x Cherry Pickers
THANG
Team up at the end of the corridor where P1 does a Burpee at every other pillar, run up the stairs and back while P2 does Freddy Mercurys, then switch.
R2: P1 does Sister Mary Katherines at every other pillar while P2 does 100s, then switch
Mosey to the tunnel for:
10xs Ballz to the Wall – handstand push ups facing the wall
Crazy Indian – Lined up in handstand against the wall, 1st man jumps down and runs the back of the line and gets back in a handstand. Continue from one end of the tunnel to the other
10xs Ballz to the wall
Rinse & repeat the corridor partner exercise through the tunnel and back
MARY
Return to the flag for:
x20 L Oblique Crunch
x20 R Oblique Crunch
x25 LMCs
Superman/Banana
x25 Crunchy Frogs
x25 Putins
COT
Count/Name
We named FNG Dolly LLama and the ever-running Garfield returned in time to pray us out.
Thanks for following my lead through the foggy gloom. It’s always a treat on the rare occasions I can make it to Grandmother’s House.
“Well done is better than well said.” ― Benjamin Franklin
Another Monday in the books at The Chamber. Today we had 9 men and 1 K-9 looking to sweat out the frustration of a Saints loss, and also sweat out any celebratory weekend libations of LSU’s win and/or holiday festivities. Since we haven’t ventured much to the westward region of the AO, YHC figured we’d explore a bit and check out the area near Ben Franklin High School, and use the namesake as our theme for the day. Here’s what we did:
Warmup – quick lap around the lot, IW, WM, PP, Plank Roll
Moseyed to the front of BFHS, kicked around the F3 mantra of “male leadership”, followed by an intro about Ben Franklin’s impact as a leader of his time. Since he’s on the $100 bill, 100 would be our number of the day….cause “it’s all about the Benjamins“, according to Puff Daddy.
Wall Sit for 100 sec to start things off while YHC shared a refresher of BF’s accomplishments, contributions, and accolades….
“Benjamin Franklin played an important role as one of the eight Founding Fathers, helping draft the Declaration of Independence and the U.S. Constitution. He never served as president but was a respected writer, printer, political philosopher, politician, Freemason, postmaster, scientist, inventor, humorist, civic activist, statesman, and diplomat.” Then a few quotes to stew on….“By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.”……….“In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.” ― Benjamin Franklin
BF stop #2 at the front steps, partnered up for a Dora-ish circuit…..PAX #1 works on 100 Step Jumps (2nd step) followed by 100 Declined Hip Slappers while PAX#2 runs the parking lot loop, where some good F2 was had along the way. T-claps to Pop Tart for the brisk runs!
BF stop #3 near the rear of the building for another Dora-ish circuit…PAX#2 works on 100 Hand Release Merkins followed by 100 Low Slow “Real Man” Squats, cause Ben Franklin didn’t shortcut anything, while PAX#2 runs a similar parking lot loop….more good F2.
Since ole Ben was a smart fella, most would assume he was no stranger to the library, so that’s where we headed next. As the centerpiece of UNO’s campus, the Earl K Long Library boasts some of the finest concrete ledges and sprawling grass around, ideal for some staple F3 exercises. The plan called for 100 total reps on each of the 4 sides of the building…
#1 – Dips x25, Calf Raises x25, rinse and repeat
#2 – Wall Sit for 100 sec while we brushed up on the history of Earl Long, a former Louisiana governor, leader, and lover of the ladies.
Indian Run back to the flag, getting back just in time. Capped off with a COT, announcements, and prayer intentions for several families battling serious medial issues, along with those fighting addiction, and for guidance to continue to be strong men, husbands, fathers, and leaders.
YHC then remembered to share yet another Franklin quote on the wanke, this one with a bit more substance and relative to what we strive for through F3, and Holy Grove was really digging it, so it was requested that it be read again…
“Be at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let every new year find you a better man.” ― Benjamin Franklin
After a disclaimer and introduction, our fearless pilot took us to 35k feet. Instead of the mile-high club, we hit moderate to severe turbulence in the form of complaining and spelling corrections (so apparently release only has 1 ‘A’), and apparently people have a really long memory about what Peppa did for his last birdcage Q in April.
The oxygen masks dropped from the ceiling at prison cell push-ups.
Warmup: 1/3 mile mosey, side-straddle hops, imperial walkers, 5 burpees, then a 1/4 mile mosey, side shuffle, high knee, butt-kick.
The Thang: 1/4 mie run after completing each station for a total of 2.0 miles
30 dips
30 squats
20 hand release (or realease) Muricans
20×2 step-ups
20 burpees
20×2 lunges
10 prison cell push-ups
10 box jumps
We rounded out the workout with 12 minutes of Mary, the highlights included:
Protractor (my personal favorite)
Crunchy frog
Jack Webbs (not really a Mary, but a fine choice by Seaman)
It was a perfect morning in the Gloom for YHC to shake off some
rust after a prolonged absence from Q duty. YHC rolled in hot, gave the disclaimer, and 29
PAX were off and running. After a short
mosey, the PAX circled up in front of Tulane for a warmup (all IC):
SSH x25
Lunges x10
LSS x20
Backward Lunges x10
Imperial Walkers x26
From there, headed straight to the mountain and worked our way to the summit by alternating on each level — Burpees x7 and Plank Jacks x 20 – which worked out to plus or minus 6 sets. At the top, circle up for a COP featuring (all IC):
Wife Pleasers x25
Supermans x25
Low Country Crab x25
Fire Hydrant w/ kick x20
Not much counting by the PAX, but plenty of mumblechatter about the volume of the wife-pleasing and grumbling about the selection of “classic Yankee” exercises. Next, we headed down the mountain, this time alternating Merkins x10 and Mountain Climbers x20 at each level. Plank and wait for the 6 and mosey over to the benches for a final COP (all IC):
Box Jumps x20 (up/down as the cadence)
Dips x15
LL Power Ups x20
Dips x15
RL Power Ups x20
Dips x15
Mosey back to the flag then hold Mission Impossible for +/- 90
seconds. Wrap up with the countoff, name-o-rama
(welcome FNG-Gump!), and prayer.
Pete and Repeat went to the Marsh for a beatdown. Pete went down after finishing 6 exercises
and 60 reps. Who was left? Repeat.
Repetition can be a good or bad thing, depends on what you
are repeating. Today, it was a good thing.
WARMORAMA
SSH, Imperial Walkers, Toe Touches, Arm Circles (front,
back, small, big)
Warm up run to stop sign and back
YHC had trouble counting which produced uneven counts for each warm up: 12/12/14/12/8.
Mumblechatter:
Overwhelming excitement for Lane Kiffin and the Rebels (at least for YHC and Cowbell); If you take the back seat out of a huge van you can put a crib in for a newborn; Saints loss / 3 men and a 10 second facemask to get Kittle down
Pick up coupons (notably heavier than those at the Gipper).
Wiki posted which was referenced often.
THANG
6 rounds; 6 exercises, 10 reps each, run to stop sign and
back; Increase by 1 rep each round
Cowbell was out of the gates in Gazelle fashion after round
1. After a slow 1st round Bushwhacker came in stride, while YHC,
Goose, and Pick stayed even until the end. Shout out to Bushwhacker for even
showing up after the Hundo training and a lakefront beatdown 2 days prior.
MARY
YHC lost count of time due to a small watch font and bad eyes. Bushwhacker kept counting down 3 min, 2 min, 1 min while I was thinking we had until 6:15 and we could get at least another round in. Cowbell asked if we were going to do Mary – que to stop. After returning coupons, Mary was 30 seconds of LBC’s OYO.
COT
Count-O-Rama | Pray out
Although we did not reach our lofty goal of 6 rounds because of time constraints, it was a great way to start the week. Bush and Cowbell finished 1 round ahead of YHC, Pick, and Goose. As a team, we totaled 948 reps and ran 8.8 miles in less than 45 minutes.
I couldn’t have finished 1 round 6 months ago when I started
with F3. The opportunity to lead my VQ at the Marsh, was a Milestone for me
indeed.
Was it as epic as expected? You bet. There were packs of wild dogs, gators lying in wait in the shallow ditches of Abita Springs, machete-wielding vagabonds hiding under the overpass, and, of course, 9 pairs of utterly destroyed feet.
As you might expect, this group of men started out strong. After a quick COT where Tank prayed us in with blessings and thoughts of safety, we set out. At this point there was still a good deal of revelry happening on Girod Street, where Sips of the Season was winding down and more than a few men were teetering in and out of bars. Caught one doing the sidewalk, using the hedges to try and keep upright. Little did we know we’d have roughly the same gait by the end of the night.
But we passed the revelry with a smile and a bounce in our step, ready to tackle the road ahead. Gideon – the Navy Seal of Netflix and Pizza – got the party started with a killer mix, and we were off. Running now at a brisk pace, more than a few of us looked around and wondered, “Wait, didn’t we say we were walking this thing?”
Getting to the Abita Trailhead (approx 9.5 miles in) was relatively quick. Took a short break (with open facilities near midnight, no less), and forged ahead. Now here’s where things started getting dicey. Jose and Moby had decided early on that they’d keep at a brisk walking pace, and so the rest of the overzealous gang started seeing a bit of separation from them. A few of us would run back and check in but eventually they seemed to be going pretty steady, and so everyone just kept moving. Shortly after hitting the Abita trailhead, the trace goes pretty dark, a little less residential, and a lot more wooded. Being the merry band of travelers that we were, we happened to rouse a few wild dogs in the woods. Tank was in the lead when the barking began, and when it was clear they were following us, he quickly circled back to the group ready for war. The dogs stayed with us for a block or so, obscured by the woods, with Tank flashing his lights in and catching the glint of at least 5 pairs of eyes. As you can imagine, Tank was fired up. He flipped his headlamp into strobe mode (hoping to give our canine friends a seizure, or at the very least some confusion), Speedy pulled out a small knife, and there was a good half hour discussion on the weapons that would need to be crafted for the return trip through that section (Spears, bats with barbed wire, you get the idea). The dogs probably sensed all the testosterone and fell back as we forged ahead. (Either that or they were simply residential dogs behind a wire fence that couldn’t we couldn’t see, but hey, not a theory YHC was ready to verify!)
Soon thereafter we reached The Gipper and collectively felt pretty darn good about ourselves. Roughly halfway and everyone was still feeling fresh. Moby had been picked up by Vickie in Abita Springs and it was time to check in with Jose, who had now been traveling solo for a few miles. Tank was quite worried about the pack of wild dogs, and sent Jose an urgent text message warning him of the dangers ahead. Unfortunately, some other “Richard” in Tank’s address book would be receiving that midnight message about the wild dogs of Abita, os Tank was not wearing his reading glasses at the time. For some reason, YHC imagines that other Richard will not be that surprised.
Hammer kept it old school and broke out the Big League Chew, and after another short break, the men turned back to head for Mandeville. Covington turned out to be just as active as Girod street had been hours ago – and, with all the drunken revelry surrounding us, more than a few men were reminded of the time we bear crawled down Bourbon Street for the Grow Ruck.
Apparently Jose had turned on the heat after passing Abita as we caught him just a few yards shy of the infamous Butter Krisp and, for a brief moment, the group was in tact. At some point YHC got a little too close to a gator, who’s loud dash into the ditch sent me nearly knocking over Wacker. (A scene reminiscent of that Captain Sparkles surprise attack at the Scramble.).
Tank, Jose, and YHC eventually slowed down while the rest of the gang moved onward at a steady clip.
Jose was undaunted by all Frank’s talk of rabid dogs, and in fact, he started heckling them as we got close. Tank tried to quiet him and Jose said hey, if a dog attacked him, he’d sue the hell out of the owners. Tank explained that it was a poor area and he probably wouldn’t get much. Jose said, “That’s fine, I’ll liquidate their assets.”
Tank’s reply?
“I’ll liquidate those dogs’ nuts if I have to.” Cue the grunting and strobing headlamps.
Meanwhile, Speedy hit a physical and mental wall at Koop Drive and wasn’t sure he’d be able to continue. The men stopped to support him, but not for long, as Speedy drew down deep, found some reserves, and pushed ahead.
Tank, Jose and I made it through Abita without incident, and, after telling the legend of the machete man who lives under the overpass, we started approaching Koop Dr. Once there, Jose told Tank and I to turn it on, that he’d be fine the rest of the way.
Took a bit to catch up with the rest of the men, who had adopted a new strategy in our absence – run a song / walk a song. This was a total crapshoot with Gideon’s mix, knowing that there’d an 8-minute Rebirth song hitting at some point. But it was a great distraction and we quickly found our way to Grandmother’s tunnel for a photo op, before hitting the Mandeville trailhead.
Another break, Butt Splice bandaged a badly blistered foot, and onward we went.
It all got a bit blurry at this point, but here are a few things I remember: Tank and Bush passing me at the lakefront for their final mile, doing it at an under 8 minute pace; the heroic image of Speedy, who thought he was done 10 miles back, running to Survivor with fists in the air to the finish line; Splice, feet wounded but patiently awaiting the sunrise that would bring his hour-long Q.
The entire group finally laid out on the lakefront lawn, just in time for Garfield to show up, stretching for the a Saturday morning pre-thang. To no one’s surprise, Tank ran the pre-thang like he hadn’t just run/walked 33 miles. And then, Splice Q’d the hourlong beatdown like the beast that he is, and unabashedly included many, many box jumps.
33 miles. 1/3 of our final goal, and it was hard. Really hard. The road ahead to the hundo is dark, and yet because of you guys, YHC is undaunted. This night made us stronger, more prepared, and more knowledgeable. Most of all, it made us realize the incredible fortitude of the men around us. Success or failure, Hundo, here we come.
