F3 New Orleans

Tag: Fast Tax

  • It’s Too Slippery…that’s what she said – from Fast Tax

    El Diablo – 2/16/22

    Given the amount of unflattering commentary aimed in the Q’s direction prior to disclaimer, YHC knew it was going to be a day for penalty burpees. With disclaimer said, we moseyed out of the gate toward the rock pile. After the first stop for penalty burpees (Rudy), YHC called an audible and dispersed the warmups throughout the mosey to the rock pile: Abe Vigodas, mosey, Happy Jacks, punitive burpees (Hokie), mosey, Hairy Rockettes, final mosey to rock pile.

    After medium to heavy rock selection, we headed to the football field for the first exercise of the morning and a Fast Tax favorite, Field of Dreams.

    FOD: Partner up, PAX 1 begins to traverse the field as follows: lunge with rock to 25yd line, drop rock, do 10 merkins, bear-crawl to 75 yd. line, do 10 Crab Merkins (aka extended wife pleaser merkins, i.e. pushups while holding the crab position), lunge remaining 25 yds and do 50 BBS at goal line, repeat back. Meanwhile, PAX 2 does 15 rows, 15 curls, and 15 O/H press then runs to switch with PAX 1 (without bringing rock) who runs back and does the rows, curls, etc. Cycle repeats until they are back at the starting point.

    William Wallace on the tennis courts, previously known as Rock the Court, was the next event, this time without rocks to avoid the wrath of the tennis pros.

    WW: Divide into 4 teams, one at each corner. One PAX member from each team runs to the center and performs 10 reps of the first of five selected exercises (Burpees, Crab-Merkins, Plank Jacks, Floyd Mayweathers, and Absolutions) while the rest of the Pax are in a low plank (or other variations of plank). When he returns to his corner and low-planks, the next teammate runs to the center and does 10 of the same exercise. This repeats until all PAX on the team has had a turn, then the cycle repeats for the next exercise, and so on, until all five are complete.

    With time to spare, we headed to the playground for the Playground Scramble , another chance for YHC to deny his 50 years by proving he could still act like a child.

    The Playground Scramble went something like this: All PAX start in plank while first PAX soldier crawls up the spiraled tubular slide, down the ramp, through the small tunnel, then arm over arm across the monkey bars, across the balance beam, arm over arm across the next two overhead bar things then side scramble across the rock wall, all while not touching the ground. Anyone touching the ground had to do 20 burpees. Next PAX can start up the slide after the PAX ahead of him exits the slide at the top. PAX waiting at the beginning or the end had to do continuous BBS or plank until everyone made it through…at least that was how it was supposed to go.
    I think only two or three PAX, including yours truly, actually made it up the slide, the rest complained about it being too slippery [that’s what she said] and that YHC only made it b/c he was scrawny, and other lame excuses… Needless to say, there were a lot of burpees being done.

    As the last PAX completed the course, time was running out, so to the rock pile we headed, followed by a quick mosey to the flag for name-o-rama, announcements, intentions, and prayer. Coffeteria at PJs followed.

    Thanks for the fellowship and the opportunity to lead!

    SYITG

  • WAIT…The Mountain Is The Other Way! – from Fast Tax

    It was a brisk morning at Wolfpack Mountain. As YHC walked up to the circle, it was apparent that many of the PAX assembled were stretching out for an anticipated run to the Mountain…little did they know that was not to occur. As the clock ticked toward 5:30 we were joined by 2 FNG’s and welcomed two PAX from out of state: Roadhouse (F3 Omaha) and Chazz (F3 Naperville).

    After disclaimer, we moseyed off into the park, confusion/consternation evident on the face of some of the PAX as the Q clearly was going the wrong way…the mountain was the other way. I could almost hear the thoughts emanating from those in the back, “does he know this is WPM? Should we tell him we usually head the other way?” Nope, not today.
    We moseyed all of about 25 yards and circled up for warmups, which began with the ordinary and then a couple of more creative items thrown in: Abe Vigodas, SSH, Nancy Kerrigans, Hairy Rockettes.

    Warmups completed, we moseyed through the park until YHC found 3 trees suitable for the next event – Bearmuda Triangle. It turns out the event was aptly named since we mysteriously lost a couple of PAX along the way…
    Three trees, ~30yds apart in shape of a triangle. PAX performs one burpee at first tree and bear crawls to 2nd tree, 2 burpees and bear crawls to 3rd tree, 3 burpees and bear crawl back to 1st marker. Rinse and Repeat except 3,6,9 Crab Merkins (which were apparently new to Uptown). Rinse and repeat 9,12,15 Burpees. Add in navigating through the dog crap…Priceless.

    Captain Thor followed, a 1:4 ratio of BBS to American Hammer, performed OYO, increasing by 1:4 each rep, 10 reps. For those who like to avoid math, the total effort was 55 BBS and 220 Amer Hammers.

    Still not facing a mutiny from the dirty hands and lack of running, YHC called out the next exercise, Welsh Dragons.
    While remaining in plank position, PAX bear crawls forward 5 yds, does 1 merkin, 1 plank jack, and tap the BACK of each shoulder 1 time. Repeat adding 1 rep to each exercise each 5 yds – bear crawl forward 5 yds, do 2 merkins, 2 plank jacks, 2 sets of back of shoulder taps… etc. We continued until we got to 10 reps each (50 yds), holding plank for rest of PAX to finish.

    With time to spare, YHC thought Indian Crab Walk, sure, why not…

    We wrapped up the day’s events circled up around the fountain for tricep dips and the manatee, an over-the-back shoulder-leg stretchy thing starting from the superman position. Yes, it looks as funny as it sounds.

    As 6:15 came upon us, we headed back to the virtual flag for COT, welcoming our new FNGs, Prairie Dog and Carpetbagger. Followed by Coffeteria at PJs.
    PS, It wasn’t until later that YHC realized (or was reminded) that PAX were likely hoping to get a lot of running in for RunCajunRun…Sorry.

    Thanks for the fellowship and the chance to lead at WPM!
    SYITG

  • I didn’t know I had Muscles There… – from Fast Tax

    It was a rather chilly morning as four PAX manned-up to start the week appropriately at Rock City, eagerly anticipating what YHC had in store.

    After disclaimer, we headed to the rock pile.
    Warmups consisted of SSH, Grass Grabbers, Nancy Kerrigans, and Hairy Rockettes

    After “medium” rock selections, we headed to the Shelter where YHC began the number game. PAX took turns picking a number from 1 to 7 with each number corresponding with the numbered workout below.
    1. Rapid Fire Rock Set
    2. Rock-a-bye Baby
    3. Bearmuda Triangle
    4. Rocks Up – Rocks up
    5. Bear Crawl Snake
    6. Hair Burners
    7. Head, Shoulders, Knees & Toes

    In hindsight, YHC could have mixed it up some since all of the exercises involved shoulder work…we’ll feel that one in the morning.

    As the seventh exercise was completed, we moseyed to the rock pile to drop our rocks and head back to COT for name-o-rama, announcements, intentions, and prayer.

    Thanks for the fellowship!
    SYITG

  • I Think We Needed Our Heads Examined – from Fast Tax

    Six of F3 Nola’s finest displayed their true grit and stalwart character when they braved the subarctic temperatures and gale force winds to participate in another round of Battle Frisburpee at the Uptowner on Friday. Okay, maybe not gale-force winds and sub-arctic temperatures but it was 36F with light rain and a wind chill of 28.

    After a hasty disclaimer, we moseyed to the driest part of the field for warmups, each of us quietly thinking to ourselves that we should have our head examined…

    Warmups:
    Grass Grabbers, SSH, Bat Wings with MNC. YHC ditched the Swan Dives b/c that would involve getting wetter than we needed to.

    Unwilling to jump right into the highly anticipated main event but trying to keep us warm, YHC kicked things off with Catch Me If You Can:
    PAX partner up. Partner 1 performs 10 Merkins and then sprints to catch the Partner 2, who has been running backwards. Partner 2 now does Merkins while partner 1 runs backwards. The cycle continued until we finished a lap with YHC switching from Merkins to Crab Merkins.

    Wanting to give the PAX some practice throwing the frisbee in the gale force winds, YHC selected Go Fetch as the next thang:
    One pax throws a frisbee. All PAX sprint in that direction until frisbee lands. When it lands, all PAX stop and then lunge-walk until they get to the frisbee. First PAXD there gets to throw the Frisbee, rinse and repeat except change out lunge-walk with bear crawl, then back to lunge walk b/c it is too frickin wet and cold for bear crawls.

    With 25 minutes to go, it was time for BATTLE FRISBURPEE.
    Team 1: Fast Tax, Hand Grenada, Charmin
    Team 2: Bogie, Mahatma, Disclaimer

    After a recitation of the rules for those PAX who were new to the game, we commenced. The battle was intense, in part because there was a lot more running with only 3 people per team and a lot more burpees were required due to the wind catching the Frisbee and PAXs’ hands being too frozen to function very well.

    The game was tied with 3 minutes to go as the rain started to come down again. Marshaling their reserves, Team 1 (primarily Charmin & Hand Grenada b/c YHC was done in by that point) adroitly and tactically moved the Frisbee down the field to score the final point, winning the game 2-1.

    With game over we headed to COT for name-o-rama, announcements, intentions, and prayer.
    Followed by Coffeteria at PJs.
    Thanks for the fellowship! SYITG

  • Did I say Frisburpee? – from Fast Tax

    I could detect a hint (or was it a modicum) of disappointment in the air emanating from the 11 PAX assembled as YHC arrived to Q El Diablo this morning. Alas, what tragedy was responsible for this burgeoning discontentment? Apparently, it was seeing my hands bereft of any battle balls or Frisbee. It did not take YHC long to remember (or be reminded) that the workout description for today said “Battle Frisburpee Likely.” Not today – Sorry…

    After disclaimer, we moseyed to the rock pile area for warmups consisting of:
    • Grass Grabbers
    • 5 Penalty burpees – Rudy renaming Q’s exercises
    • 5 Penalty burpees – Rudy renaming Q’s exercises AGAIN
    • Mountain Man Poopers
    • Nancy Kerrigans – YHC was not the only one having trouble standing on one leg while sticking the other leg back and rotating both arms in circles…
    • Hairy Rockettes

    Following rock selection, we headed to the football field and lined up on the goal line for the first event, Colt 45s.
    Colt 45s are basically a broken down curl (with rock) performed IC:
    • 15 reps go from the bottom of the movement up to the halfway point (with your arms at a 90 degree angle and hands at elbow level).
    • 15 reps go from the halfway point up to the top of the bicep curl (hands up near shoulder level).
    • 15 reps start at the bottom of the movement and complete a full range of movement all the way up.

    Red Barchetta was the next event, enhanced by the musical accompaniment of Rush’s 1981 hit – Red Barchetta. PAX line up on the goal line and perform the following sequence OYO no resting:
    • 10 O/H Press; 100 yard dash, 100 SSH, run back to goal line
    • 10 O/H Press; 75 yard dash, 75 mountain climbers (2 is 1 of course), run back to goal line
    • 10 O/H Press; 50 yard dash, 50 LBCs, run back to goal line
    • 10 O/H Press; 25 yard dash, 25 merkins, run back to goal line
    • 10 O/H Press; 10 yard dash, 10 Burpees, run back to goal line

    After a 30 second breather, it was time for Captain Thor, a 1:4 ratio of BBS to American Hammer, performed OYO, increasing by 1:4 each rep, typically 10 reps. Noting the lack of gasps and groans halfway through, YHC thought we could use a couple more reps…so let’s make it 12. For those who don’t want to do the math, the last rep was 12 BBS & 48 Amer. Hammers for a total effort of 78 BBS and 312 Amer. Hammers.

    Digging deep into his repertoire of exercises for something interesting and entertaining, YHC selected Vertigos.
    PAX run to the 50 yd line but with each step you rotate so that you are always spinning as you move forward (clockwise or counter-clockwise, your choice). On reaching the 50 yd line, and letting the dizziness subside, we performed 10 absolutions and ran Vertigos back to the goal line.

    With a few minutes to spare, we paused our mosey back to the rock pile for 5 Welsh Dragons.

    Then it was back to the flag for count off, name-a-rama, announcements, and prayers.
    Happy Birthday to @Belloq

    Followed by Coffeteria at PJs.

    Thanks for the fellowship!
    SYITG

  • All About The Benjamins – from Hokie

    Seven Pax met at The Uptowner on a pleasant cool morning for a pre-coffeeteria ante

    We started warm ups, walking backwards on track with long strides around the bend and stopped on the other goal line/corner for some stretching.

    Abe Vigoda x 10
    Grass Grabbers x 10
    Bend over and reach for ground, down right leg, back to center, down left leg, back to center
    Arm Circles x 10

    After stretching “ran” backwards down the straight to the far goal line by the playground, lunged toward playground, and moseyed to rock pile where instructed to get a rock allowing us to shoulder press 25 times straight.

    Now rifle carry towards the field by gym with the two tree lines for some Benjamins

    25 Shoulder presses
    Rifle carry from one tree line to the other
    25 shoulder presses and rifle carry back to the original tree line.
    Rinse and repeat.

    100 Shoulder presses (Benjamin) complete.

    Next round after self love x 10…

    25 Curls, drop rock,
    25 Bear Crawls toward other tree line, 10 burpees, 25 Bear crawls back to 1st tree line, 10 burpees
    rinse and repeat… 50 curls in (not Benjamin, but 100 lunges Benjamin complete)

    25 more curls, 25 lunges toward other tree line, 10 burpees, 25 lunges back, rinse and repeat
    (now 100 curls complete for that Benjamin)

    15 Burpees

    Completed
    100 Shoulder presses
    100 Curls
    100 Bear Crawls
    100 Lunges
    75 Burpees (Sorry Frac)

    Mosey back to rock pile and flag.

    Thank you for allowing me to lead

  • Nothing Fancy, Just Grinding it Out – from Baywatch

    The rain missed us on Sunday and spared the PAX at Pontiff. It would have been a wet, muddy, and cold morning otherwise. Instead, the cooler temp was pleasant with an 18 mph breeze, so YHC made sure the workout wasn’t so pleasant. We headed over to the rock pile for a warmup.

    SSH 25 IC
    Mountain Climbers 25 IC
    Imperial walkers 25 IC
    Hillbillies 25 IC
    Arm Circles 15 IC (both directions)
    Grass Grabbers 10 IC

    With the warmup complete, everyone grabbed their obligatory rock and headed to the field.

    The Thang

    Grab a dance partner. While one partner is doing the rock exercise, the other partner runs to the 50 yard line and back. Then switch.

    100 over head presses
    200 curls
    300 chest presses
    400 flutter kicks

    I must admit, the curls were brutal. Although, my rock choice sure didn’t help. This took a little longer than expected so YHC cut short the next exercise. With a few minutes left, we lined up on the goal line. We bear crawled to the 20 yard line, did 5 burpees and bear crawled backed. Then we did the same thing to the 10 yard line and back.

    With rocks returned and all PAX back at the flag, we did some low slow squats and merkins IC to close out the morning.

  • Traversing the Birth Canal – from Fast Tax

    Traversing the Birth Canal

    It was a crisp, cold morning at Rock City as eleven PAX joined YHC for his 50th birthday Q.
    After disclaimer, we headed near the rock pile for warmups.

    Warmups consisted of:
    o Abe Vigodas X 10 IC
    o Nancy Kerrigans X 10 IC
    o Hairy Rockettes X 10 IC
    o Grass Grabbers IC 10
    o SSH IC 10

    Sufficiently warmed, we headed to the rock pile, grabbed medium rocks (most of us) and headed to the playground in search of YHC’s lost youth.

    The first event, which I am very uncreatively calling “Rock the Court”, pushed the bounds of comprehension/attention for many of the PAX in attendance (resulting in 10 punitive burpees before we even began) and went like this:
    Divide into 4 teams with each team occupying on corner of the tennis courts enclosure and four rocks (one for each team) placed in the center. One PAX member from each team runs to the center and performs 10 reps of the first of five selected exercises (O/H Press, Curls, Tricep Lifts, Rows, and Burpees) while the rest of the PAX are in a low plank. When he returns to his corner and low-planks, the next teammate runs to the center and does 10 of the same exercise. This repeats until all PAX on the team has had a turn, then the cycle repeats for the next exercise, and so on, until all five are complete.

    Leaving the tennis courts behind, we circled up for a round of Rocks Up (IC 15) and then it was off to the playground for YHC to deny his 50 years by proving he was still a child, or at least could act like one.

    The Playground Scramble went something like this:
    PAX start in plank while first PAX soldier crawls up the spiraled tubular slide (aptly but alarmingly described by Bolt as climbing out of the birth canal), down the ramp, through the small tunnel, then arm over arm across the monkey bars, across the balance beam, arm over arm across the next two overhead bar things then side scramble across the rock wall, all while not touching the ground (because it’s hot lava of course). Anyone touching the ground had to do 20 burpees.
    Next PAX can start up the slide after the PAX ahead of him exits the slide at the top. PAX waiting at the beginning or the end had to do continuous BBS until Q called plank or some other exercise.

    As we prepared to bring the rocks back, for a little extra entertainment, YHC thought “what kid doesn’t like a game of Indian Run?” With rocks of course. After 1 ½ cycles, YHC lost interest…time to drop off rocks and mosey to the flag.

    With a few minutes to spare, and YHC still trying to cling to his youth, we circled around the tree for Duck-Duck-Burpee, which Willie apparently forgot how to play…

    At 6:15 we headed to COT for name-o-rama, announcements, intentions, and prayer, followed by Coffeteria at PJs with a special treat (homemade coffee cake) by Mrs. Fast Tax, now affectionately called “Audit.”

    Gratitude to Bogey, Bolt, Frac Sac, Hand Grenada, Jingle Vader, King Kong, Mahatma, Scantron, Tax Credit (my 2.0), Vagabond, and Willie for being part of my birthday Q and making it so enjoyable.

    Thanks for the fellowship!
    SYITG