F3 New Orleans

Tag: Grandma's House

  • April 1,000 2025 – from Grundy

    Scratch sound followed by the following message…

    “We did 1,000 reps combined of burpees and Bobby Hurleys. We also moved weights in a bucket and a cinder block.”

    … We now return you to your show already in progress.

  • April Fool’s Workout: The Legend of Grundy and the Bucket of Doom – from Grundy

    This morning, the sun rose on an unsuspecting group of warriors, ready for another classic April Fool’s workout. Grundy, our fearless leader, arrived with Jose Russo Bushwacker Shooter, who may or may not be a real person but certainly sounded like a guy who meant business. We all chuckled, debating whether we should start with a solid 30 minutes of warm-ups or just dive into the rich history of pranks from workouts past. But no—Grundy was in no mood for jokes today. He had a bucket full of stones and a soul full of vengeance.

    The madness began immediately. One unlucky soul had to carry the Bucket of Doom all the way to the stage, where they were rewarded with 10 burpees—a true sign that life is unfair—before running it back to the group. Meanwhile, the rest of us embraced the suffering with burpees, because why not add to the chaos with a running cumulative total? Once the poor fool with the bucket survived, we transitioned to our next task: carrying the Block of Destiny up and down the stairs, a shuttle run from Hades itself.

    But wait—there’s more. We then formed a circle to partake in what can only be described as the most ridiculous exercise ever invented. Each of us paraded our blocks down the corridor with the grace of a newborn giraffe, before planking and sliding our coupon back like we were human curling stones.

    Then, things got weird. Dragons descended from the heavens. Fire-breathing lizards engaged in aerial combat. Grundy, now completely unhinged, lifted 400 blocks with a single pinky while cackling like a supervillain. Burpees and squats continued as monstrous creatures clashed in an epic battle of strength and agility.

    And just when it seemed like things couldn’t get any wilder…

    Oh wait. April Fool’s.

    But seriously, we’re all sore now.

    Come out to the A1C on April 11th for Moby’s Birthday Q. He’s turning 75!!

  • Lord of the Flies you say? – from Russo

    Conversations tend to get out of hand on occasion early in the morning. What starts with a simple “How was your weekend?” quickly turns into something greater, and in this instance at Granny’s, it was “Next thing you it’s a Lord of the Flies situation”. You have to be there to appreciate.

    Pax of 4 for the beatdown.

    Warmups (IC 10x)
    – SSHs
    – Torso twists
    – Self love
    – High knees
    – Grass grabbers
    – Imperial walkers

    Thang
    Ye olde tried and true deck of death, using the benches as changes of scenery:

    Spades – urkins
    Clubs – step ups
    Diamonds – freak nastys
    Hearts – BSSs

    Spades – Peter Parker’s
    Clubs – shoulder tap plank jacks (2 is 1)
    Diamonds – lunges (2 is 1)
    Hearts – leg raises

    Spades – Merkins
    Clubs – Monkey Humpers
    Diamonds – SMCs
    Hearts – American hammers

    Between the rounds, we slalomed the columns and did 2 calf raises up each are of the pilot house

    Mary was a one minute plank.

    We finished with COT, NOR, and quick prayer.
    Thanks to the three krewe men for joining.
    SYITG

  • Post St. Patrick Day Fun – from Steve

    I am stuck in my annual LEAP testing training so I decided to do Steve’s backblast post St. Patricks Day!

    There once was a man stuck in review,
    With nothing important to do.
    So he wrote with some flair,
    ‘Bout Steve’s lack of care,
    And a workout that barely pulled through!

    They warmed up but couldn’t keep pace,
    Poor Steve had a look of disgrace.
    With counting all botched,
    And focus half-watched,
    It turned to a comedy case!

    They crawled and they climbed in despair,
    Then ninjas showed up from nowhere!
    Or maybe, instead,
    Leprechauns leapt ahead,
    (But I left, so I really don’t care).

  • This ain’t bedroom Yoga! – from Shooter

    With darkness all around and the glistening of a full moon for illumination 5 PAX embraced the Gloom at Grannies. Steve, Russo and YHC chatted it up until Jose10k appeared out of the darkness. Behold it’s a right on time Cowbell? Nope, it’s the Wacker of bushes hooded up as he grumbles his way to the circle.. Chatter quickly shifted to the adjustments of springing forward and how us 40 somethings sleep patterns range from dream Yoga, to it won’t be long until we will have separate rooms with our significant others. Which ever the case may be, today would be a bit of a throwback to our tunnel of love that is often forgotten.

    Brief warmup of torso twists, arm circles, Cherry pickers, grass grabbers, Abe vogodas and toe touches.. Some of the numbers IC varied with Chatter overtaking the counts.

    Moseyed to the tunnel and selected two boulders from the drainage area of sorts with an alternative rock that Steve graciously found.
    We partnered up
    P1 completed reps with coupon while P2 utilized the tunnel.

    First round
    Chest press(boulders) mosey down Carioca the flat and Mosey up. R/R back and F/J
    Second round
    Overhead press (rock) & 8 count bodybuilder
    Mosey down/lunge walk flat and reverse. F/J
    Third round
    Squats (rock) & Mountain climbers
    25% mosey down, 50% flat and 100% up. R/R F/J

    Once completed moseyed our return to the bus stop for 10IC bench jump overs, 10IC leg raises breaking plane on the benches, inspired by Russo’s handstand demonstration months back challenging Bird YHC used the columns for a balls to the wall hold rounded out with 5 donkey kickoffs.

    Returned to the circle for some Mary.
    ETKs, LBCs, penguins, plank, chill-cut plank and wife pleasers.

    Counted off, announced Wacker camp out 3/22 and upcoming Zoolander Marsh madness, Inferno and Zoorich classic..

    Appreciate the post and until the next Gloom 👍🏼👊🏼✌🏼!!!

  • Mardi Gras Madness: A Leg Day to Remember – from Jose10k

    Five brave (or foolish) souls decided that the best way to celebrate Mardi Gras morning was not with king cake and mimosas, but with a leg workout that left us questioning why we didn’t sleep in. With rucksacks strapped on—because why not add extra suffering?—we kicked off the festivities with a warm-up, complete with Mardi Gras music to trick our bodies into thinking this was fun.

    Then came the main event: sprinting (or some variation of fast waddling) up the stairs (Grundy led the pax as per the usual, he legit sprinted), looping around the lighthouse, and then executing a flawless Lieutenant Dan back to the start. Three glorious laps of this, because we believe in suffering together.

    Next, we moseyed over for step-ups—ten per leg—just in case our quads weren’t already on fire. Then it was off to the bus stop for a delightful mix of Irkins and Freak Nasties, because I honestly was making up shit as I walked. I was tired.

    With our legs now resembling overcooked spaghetti, we weaved our way through a slalom run, hit some calf raises up and down, and finished strong with 15 minutes of core work, ensuring that every inch of our bodies would hate us tomorrow. Jane Fondas (Steve’s version of them, on steriods). Wife pleasers with a long pause, followed by pulses as well. “It’s the best way to dry out the taint.”

    And just like that, the beatdown was over. It’s been awhile since I actually saw an end to a Granny Beatdown. It felt odd and awkward actually typing that last sentence. Russo prayed us out, and we stumbled off to see what parades (if any) were still rolling in the wind. Thanks for letting me lead, and if your legs still function tomorrow, come join the fun at the Gipper for round three.

  • Return of the Deck – from Russo

    Congrats to everyone knocking out RCR this year. Steve definitely held up his end, and with it the end of the month, my thought was to keep the running to a minimum. So mid-to-upper 40s this morning for a krewe of 3 for the return of the deck of death.

    Warmups (IC 10x)
    – SSHs
    – Self love
    – High knees
    – Toe touches
    – Imperial walkers
    – Arm circles

    Thang
    Ye olde tried and true deck of death, using the benches and stage as changes of scenery:

    Spades – urkins
    Clubs – step ups
    Diamonds – freak nastys
    Hearts – BSSs

    Spades – Peter Parker’s
    Clubs – shoulder tap plank jacks (2 is 1)
    Diamonds – lunges (2 is 1)
    Hearts – leg raises

    Spades – Merkins
    Clubs – Monkey Humpers
    Diamonds- SMCs
    Hearts – American hammers

    Before the deck, we made a loop, and between the rounds, we slalomed the columns.

    Mary (10x IC)

    Crunchy frogs
    Hello Dollie’s
    LBCs
    Flutter Kicks

    We finished with COT, NOR, and quick prayer.
    Thanks to the two krewe men for joining.
    SYITG

  • The Mandela Effect? – from Russo

    The Mandela Effect: phenomenon where a large group of people misremember an event or share a memory of something that didn’t happen. It’s a social phenomenon that occurs when people have false memories of a person, place, or event.

    Want an example? People remember Nelson Mandela dying in prison. They may remember a cornucopia on the Fruit of the Loom logo (myself included). They swear Vader says “Luke, I am your father.” Mr. Moneybags (I think that’s the gent from Monopoly) doesn’t have a monocle?

    A more local example? The Treen Center. I swear I’ve left my keys on the bench more than once. Steve swears he remembers a Super 20-something led by me but my counting always stops at 10. We both swear we remember Shooter and Jose “scissoring” on the bench, but alas that was just a threat (proposition?).

    Jose and Steve were running around as I arrived, followed by both Coachella (not HogsBreath) and Grundy (also not HogsBreath).

    Lower 60s to start, slightly less humid, overall both “pleasant” and “sweat-inducing.”

    Warmup (all 10-20x IC)
    – Sealjacks
    – Grass grabbers
    – Arm circles
    – Imperial walkers
    – Self love
    – maybe some other stuff, I don’t remember because Jose distracted me with his average time per mile. Dude’s a full-on runner now, no doubt.

    Thang
    The Walls of Jericho
    (7 rounds of moseys around the Treen center, it of the Mandela effect) interspersed with seven reps of 7 exercises:
    – 7 merkins
    – 7 squats
    – 7 lunges
    – 7 Peter Parker’s
    – 7 SMCs
    – 7 shoulder tap plank jacks
    – 7 monkey humpers

    A mosey back to base where we wrap up with COT, NOR, Announcements, and Prayer.

    Great group this morning, and I’m glad to have been able to share the streets with you. SYITG

  • That’s right, BB completed before 6:05!! – from Shooter

    Well, that’s what happens when only one PAX post. YHC decided to run to the AO for some RCR mileage. Prospects were light as only Jose10ks Sentra sat in the parking area. H arrived out the shadows from his pre-run.
    We completed 3 warmups Good mornings, Toe Touches and Grass grabbers. With time availability shortened we simply moseyed 3 corners for 5/10/15/20/25/30.
    8counts-Merkins, squats-SMKs and plank jacks-flutter kicks. Returned to the AO for Jose10ks departure and YHC returned to Moseying on home..
    Appreciate the chatter and post to Grannies shortened Q 10k!!

    Until the next gloom 👍🏼👊🏼✌🏼!!!

  • The Blind Leading the Blind – from Steve

    But hey, at least there were no shot puts involved!

    As sometimes is the case, the most amusing part of the beatdown happened in the first few minutes, as Jose entertained us with tales of being a track coach.

    Coach 10k has got some stories, and it dawned on me that if he could hone his sound effect skills over the next 20 years (a la that dude from Police Academy), he might just take over storytime for Frank.

    YHC came somewhat prepared today with a car full of props (ok, not all-in Mathlete style, with the full gym in tow). Bush had reached out the day before to poke and prod as he is prone to do, insisting (correctly!) that we always do the same ol’ shit. Touché. Well, you gotta step up and Q it yourself then, Bush!

    Anyway, he personally requested balls to the wall, which YHC would’ve happily included, but alas, there was no Bush to be found this gloom.

    Cycled through each of the following stations twice. Second time through we replaced the merkin rows, which were brutal, with a core exercise. Once everyone had two turns at each station, hit the slalom and up the stairs for a round of SMKs/Lunges up top. Rounds were:

    Jump Rope
    Merkin Rows w/ Dumbell (R2: Leg Raises)
    Squat Thrusters (x30)

    Up Stairs – 20 SMK’s (2:1)

    Jump Rope
    Merkin Rows w/ Dumbell (R2: Crunchy Frogs)
    Curls (x40)

    Up Stairs – 20 Lunges (2:1)

    Jump Rope
    Merkin Rows w/ Dumbell (R2: Gas Pumps)
    Chest Presses (x40)

    Up Stairs – 20 SMK’s (2:1)

    Jump Rope
    Merkin Rows w/ Dumbell (R2: Freddie Merc’s)
    Alpos (x30)

    Up Stairs – 20 SMK’s (2:1)

    Once Jose departed, Russo and I discussed how snow days work when you’re home schooling, as well as the ins and outs of starting a global crochet empire. Forget Etsy, these baby blankets, beanies, and booties come with Kardashian endorsements and are featured in viral Tik Tok dances. Russo already booked flights to Shenzhen to tour their manufacturing plant and see if their knitting is up to snuff.

    All in all, if not an inventive beatdown, it was at least effective one. COT and Russo took us out. RCR is rapidly approaching, if you don’t have a team, get one today. I believe the Pork Chop Express might still need a few guys.

    And thanks to these two gents who make it a point to be consistent and keep people like myself accountable. I am incredibly appreciative to be out there with you two.