F3 New Orleans

Tag: Tanked Up

  • Murph at the Marsh – from Jose10k

    Simple: murph at the marsh with 6 of my brothers

  • Season’s Beatings – from Russo

    21 degrees to start this morning, which to my recollection was probably a record low for us. What was NOT a low? Christmas spirit.

    On Hammer (with his full body Christmas pajamas), on Akbar (decked in his finest Santa jacket and hat), on Jose10k (lighting up the gloom with Santa hat and blinking Rudolph nose)!

    T claps to TruCoat for bringing his favorite weather with him and semi-DR posters Duracell and Grover, as well as Tanked Up, who took time out of his marathon training to join as well. It’s always nice to see them, and the other bright shining faces that make Christmas (Eve) spirits bright, even if we could only see about 12% of Zoolander’s mug because he was bundled up.

    Warmups (all 10-24x IC) – depending on who you ask, no one was “warm” by any stretch
    – Sealjacks
    – SSHs
    – Toe touches
    – Self love
    – High knees
    – Butt kicks
    – Grass grabbers

    Thang
    Mosey to Granny’s, laughing all the way. Bells were jingling in the cold, and when someone shouted “Deck the halls”, Pax was asked to respond “Fah-la-La-la-la…la-la-la…La!”

    Every block or so we spread Christmas cheer, doing partner merkins spelling out:

    -Merry Christmas
    -Happy Holidays
    -Festivus
    -Hanukkah
    -Rudolph

    Dirty Santa
    Dirty Santa / White Elephant. The rules are simple:
    (1) Each HIM picks a number.
    (2) Number 1 picks a random gift/exercise from the bag and performs said exercise while the other HIM perform the standard (e.g. 20 squats)
    (3) Number 2 has a choice: Number 1’s chosen exercise, the standard, or a new “gift”. If he chooses either of the first two options, the one who had their “gift” stolen can steal or select another mystery “gift”.
    (4) Around and around we go, until all HIM have a chance to select.

    The “gifts”:
    -10 merkins
    -18 jump squats
    -12 freak nastys
    -20 squats
    -7 Hand release merkins
    – slalom the column
    – Trip up and down the pilot house
    -12 step ups (1 is 1)
    -20 hello dollies
    -10 leg raises
    -21 monkey humpers
    -25 plank jacks
    -3 krakken burpees
    -8 SMCs
    -15 murder bunnies or groiners
    -20 bear crawls
    -10 diamond merkins
    -50 high knees
    -10 star jumps
    -2 calf raises
    -20 hip slappers
    -12 hallelujah squats
    -20 cherry pickers
    -6 donkey kicks

    We then climbed the pilot house (the Christmas tree) and topped it with one Star (jump).

    Run run Rudolph
    Indian run back to start, with the 6 bringing the gift (bag) back up to the front, where it was passed back to the 6, rinse and repeat.

    Things we learned:

    (1) YHC is the only one that is a fan of murder bunnies

    (2) After his at least 8th round of them, the bright, shining Christmas star led Hammer to his enlightened Magi state, where he came to the conclusion that bears don’t call them bear crawls, but instead just “walking.”

    (3) I probably should have explained to Duracell that “slalom the columns” did not mean each and every column in St. Tammany parish.

    (4) Krakken burpees are dead. Long live KrackerJack burpees!

    (5) Jose’s 2022 dirty Santa seemed to go better than 2021, as he raised calves better than the shepherds watching their flocks at night.

    COT, Name-o-Rama, Announcements and Prayer closed us out.

    I mentioned last year that I had a chance to catch The Chosen’s Christmas program, and the theme was “They must know.” I again want the to share that sentiment this Christmas with those still reading, that in my mind, all HIM should know:

    Jesus Christ is King, and reigns forever. God chose to come down from heaven, leaving the glory behind, to join us here on Earth, to meet us where we are. To show us who He truly is, to be with us, to right our wrongs, despite the mess we made of his creation and our turning our backs on him or worshiping other gods/idols, in whatever form they take.

    That’s love in its highest form: pure, unrestrained, unconditional, abounding and abundant. I have very little to offer in return, outside of the one thing God requires: my heart. I am going to fall short each and every day, but that’s my goal to him, my family, you all, and everyone I encounter.

    Thank you all for joining, and continuing to make the decision to post and fellowship, even when it’s “cold” outside. I appreciate this group and wish you all the best Christmas season.

    SYITG

  • IPC Week 3 – Mrs. Burns – from Akbar

    Saturday, what a great day. YHC hasn’t really thought about it lately, but it’s true. As Wicket told me after Coffeeteria – On Saturdays I get to go to F3, wear my gym shorts all day, play with friends, don’t have to do school, and eat donuts and pancakes. That’s good, and so was the beatdown.

    YHC and Wicket arrived early to set up, seeing Pik and Speedy for the pre-thang 2miler. Circle up for the flag just in time to hear loud crying – Hammer brought Machete out for a beatdown. Machete cried pretty much the whole time, until we started the warmup. The cadence call was like a lullaby for the young man.

    Everyone arrived and we started out with warm ups x 10 IC, except for 1 exercise that was x9IC. SSH, arm circles front/back, imperial walkers, hillbillies, high knees, butt Kicks, self-love, toe touches, and grass grabbers.

    Grab blocks, head to the tree/start line and instructions were given.

    Week 3 was called Mrs. Burns, doing 571 reps to honor Kathleen Walzer and her fight with pancreatic cancer for 571 days.

    5 Rounds + one extra 400m run at the end. 571 reps for time

    20 Overhead Presses

    20 Burpees

    20 Curls

    20 V Ups

    20 Goblet Squats

    13 Manmakers

    400m run

    Grundy, Tank, and Steve were out of the gate fast. Wicket did some stuff, then put on my shades and decided to DJ for a while – then got back to work. This was brutal. The workout pretty much took everything out of you making the run harder. So instead of making up time on the run, it was more recovery. Halfway through a guy joined us that was unrecognizable, and I thought we may have another Fly By EH. But it turned out to be Gronk who we haven’t seen in a couple of years. Great to have you back man.

    T Claps to the top unofficial finishers, meaning the guys sitting on the wall while everyone else was still working hard. Grundy, Tanked Up, Steve, and Hammer

    Time called, with a short rest in the grass. A brief glimpse of Jose 10k holding Hammers legs over the seawall. YHC figured Machete had dropped a baby toy in the water. Hammer waded in the murky water to retrieve only his hat. Which is much better than dropping a toy.

    Head back to the flag just in time for Count and Nameorama.

    YHC closed us out with this prayer – which was said each day the Kathleen Welzer had pancreatic cancer:

    “Lord, we thank you for this day. A day we get to choose. We get to choose between darkness or light. Today, we choose light. Amen”

    Coffeeteria at Book and the Bean:

    Great work today guys, way to push hard and get it done. 1 more week and IPC is in the books.

    SYITG – Akbar

  • The St. Vincent 500 – from Paradox

    Our tale begins in the spring of 2022 in a small bayou town where a community pharmacy, after taking losses from storm and plague, had great need. After decades of providing vital prescription medicine for those in need, this team of volunteers now searched for the same helping hand. The Pax of F3 Thibodaux heard the call, and a plan was devised. We consulted our sage leader for advice. This HIM had carried the torch of 3Fs from the Mandevillage many moons ago. He knew the way of the pax and was skilled in the smithing of a fine beatdown. He peered into the gloom with a thousand-mile stare and the fate of the fundraiser hung in the balance. “if you build it..they will come” Goose said with a nod and then promptly vanished into a flurry of burpees. With a team formed and a grant secured we dove into the work.
    An event was needed and a place to rally the pax. A race, but not just any race. A challenge of physical and mental strength that would call to the hearts of the Louisiana PAX. A series of pain and cardiovascular torture so intense that no self-respecting HIM of F3 Nola could resist. It was forged in the caves of .word files and hammered through the gmail circuit boards. Welded to perfection one station at a time. A burpee here, a bonnie blair there. Precious metals adorned it at every corner to award prepared pax but many traps lay waiting for poor form. It was written, and it was done and it was beautiful.

    The beacons of aid were lit! Thibodaux called for aid…and our brothers answered.
    39 PAX (including 6 FNGs!) assembled at the stage on a gorgeous bayou morning! They came from northern shores and from western banks. From uptowns and motherships. From Grannies and Lakefronts. They came in calf sleeves, mudgears and some even bare of foot! Namesakes that struck fear like Shooter and Tanked. Some that drew intrigue like Hokie and Hawg. Famed backblasters we had read for years like Steve and Akbar. Even legends of the gloom like Frac and the Reluctant Yankee, who were there when the deep magic was gifted to us from the eastern coast. They followed a lonesome bayou road and mumbled Deliverance jokes along the way. They came as one to help a great cause and lock shields with their brothers in the bayou. The course was set, pleasantries exchanged, and the only thing left to do was make a run at 500. Let’s get to it…

    Warmup

    Goose gave the disclaimer and race details, and pointed out key safety and strategy reminders. Each two-person pax team would start at a numbered station along the course. Once the horn was blown, they would begin at their station and advance. Each station had 3 options: bronze, silver or gold. (Worth 10, 15 and 25 points respectively. So, a perfect score of gold at all 20 stations would reach the mythical 500 points. These corresponded to the number of reps completed by a team combined. They then would grab the token and secure it in an advanced technology carrying case (Ziploc bag). Head for the next station and rinse and repeat until you have finished 20 stations or ran out of time.
    After this was explained he led a thunderous cadence of our usuals stage warmups. This was YHCs first experience with a >20 pax group and the big group energy was powerful

    THE THANG

    Pair up, line up and we were numbered off 1-19 (one team of 3). Each team headed for their station and when GI Joe hit the airhorn it was geaux time. The stations were as follows:

    STATIONS:
    1. Merkins- 40, 80, 120
    2. Bobby Hurleys—30, 60, 90
    3. Freddy Mercuries—50, 100, 200
    4. Coupon Curls—40, 60, 100
    5. SSH: 50, 100, 150
    6. Carolina Dry Docks- 40, 60, 100
    7. Big Boy Sit Ups- Partner does big boys, one partner sprints to next station and back. 100, 150, 200 situps
    8. Side lunges (2 is 1)- 40, 80, 120
    9. Coupon OHP- 40, 60, 100
    10. Burpees- 30, 50, 100
    11. LBC’s- 50, 100, 200
    12. Peter Parker Merkins- 30, 60, 90
    13. Bonnie Blair (2 is 1) 40, 60, 100
    14. Brick Back Flys- 50, 100, 200
    15. Leg Raise Dora – One partner Leg raises, one partner bear crawl to next station and run back. 50, 100 or 200
    16. Mission Impossible Plank- combined time: 1 minute, 2 minutes, 5 minutes
    17. Coupon Swings- 40, 60, 100
    18. Prisoner Squats – 50, 100, 150
    19. Mountain Climber (2:1) 50, 100, 200
    20. Arm Circles while partner crabwalks to next station and runs back. Complete 100, 200, or 400

    After 1 hour of “Pax vs St. Vincent course” the dust settled and everyone returned to the flag. Chatter was high about the difficulty of the layout, the supreme fun had traversing the course and low rumblings of scores north of 400 permeated the air. A few teams completed counting up their coins while we began the count off, and name off. YHC was impressed with the veteran naming experience of NOLA and northshore pax. Their FNG naming skills were unparalled and we left with six newly minted local PAX: Welcome Sir Lawrence, Kodiak (CodyYak), MeatSweats, One Call, Wallflower and Lambchops. Looking forward to getting yall in the mix.

    Now down to serious business. YHC and Goose dramatically unveiled the official St. Vincent 500 dual trophies for the final presentation. Imagine a 12-inch manifestation of the love child between Hulk and Stretch Armstrong, in a full rage pose. Victory is all he has ever known. After appropriate oooohhhhs and ahhhhsss Goose led a suspenseful point count-off to see who the last team was standing. In the end, the combination of Tanked Up and Speedy Gonzalez tallied 470 points and took home the first annual St. Vincent 500 trophy! T- Claps on those numbers gentlemen. Phenomenal effort. We’ll all be gunning for you next year.

    Coffeeteria after provided by our St. Vincent de Paul board and it was great to get a chance to talk shop with all the pax and compare notes on course strategy.

    YHC could not have envisioned the tremendous amount of support we would receive from both our local community and our F3 community for this cause.
    So grateful for each one of you who spent your weekend time and energy for this event.

    At the time of writing this backblast we have raised $10, 451. 51!! This goes directly to purchase of prescription medicine for those individuals in need. Praise God!

    Thank you for the oppurtunity to lead.

    SYITG,
    Paradox

  • 2 year anniversary of the A1C – from Jose10k

    Nice humid morning, YHC arrived extra early to apply the finishing touches to the 2nd anniversary beatdown of the A1C. I love when the lights of the parking garage turn on at 5:00, it helps turn on my switch to get ready for the beatdown. An unusual truck appeared first, it took awhile to determine who it was…JV showed up for his first A1C. The numbers showed up, and I was very humbled by the support of my brothers.
    Warm-up: ssh, grass grabbers, self love, torso twists, imperial walkers all ic. Then the cupid shuffle: everyone in plank position, the music starts, shoulder taps until the chorus, right steps, left steps, butt kicks, mountain climbers, then back to shoulder taps.
    The thang: Mosey to the side of the parking garage for some dora. Partner one runs a loops while partner two performs the exercise, then switch up. 100 lunges (2 is 1), 200 squats, 300 merkins. After that fun, mosey back up to the top, where we broke up into 3 groups of 4 for some burpee ball. Every time you hit the ball in the air, you drop and do a burpee. The beach ball is allowed to touch the ground only one time. Penalty exercise is 25 squats. Went all the way to 6, then COT. Welcome back Einstein. Shooter prayed us out, BBQ busted out the celebratory brownies, and we huddle up for a quick picture.
    This was the 106th A1C, and I appreciate all those the help create this AO. The ones who helped me create it, the ones who showed up each week to keep it going, the Mandevillians who came out to support this Covington AO, and my brothers who are always there no matter what is going on. When people ask my about F3, I always tell them that the F2 is the most important aspect of F3. The exercises is just the lagniappe. Thank you for letting me lead today, thank you for giving me the courage to step out of my comfort zone, two years ago, to create this AO. Thank you to Moby, BBQ, and Einstein (my Covington Crew) for making it out each week. Thank you my brothers!! SYITG

  • Fire Fighter Challenge Part Deux – from Bushwacker

    I feel I’ve been so delinquent in my commitment to F3 lately and it showed as I tried to start the warmorama. IMHO (as the kids put it), that delinquency continued right on through the beat down with my unorganized leadership, chaotic participation, and off-the-cuff modifications. But YHC brought the coupons, set the games in motion, and we all watched with little surprise as the former Marsh Madness champion and current King of Distain quite literally ran away with the Badaxe award this go ’round. Nonetheless, all men (regardless of age) put forth an effort most valiant indeed!

    WARMORAMA
    As previously mentioned, QIC felt entirely out of practice, forgetting exercise names, miscalling cadences, and generally flubbing my return. But PAX kept showing up until the ranks grew to a respectable number. Even after out our mosey to the shaft, Grundy popped up to fiddle around with our tires.

    THANG
    Farmer’s Carry
    Sledge Hammer Tire
    Tire Flip
    Tire Pull
    Prisoner’s Carry
    Tire Drag
    Chain of Doom
    Lunge Walk

    Teams of 2-3 did 3 1 minute rounds switching between the coupon and plank or al gore. We kept this up until, with 5 minutes remaining, the 4 bad asses competing for the Badaxe award ran the tire drag for time. As previously mentioned, our own reverend pastor preacher man took home the prize… until next time!

    COT
    On the spot we carried out count/nameorama, with zoo having departed prematurely. I appreciate you guys. I cherish my time with you guys. Many many thanks!

  • Can Do card workout again! – from BBQ

    Another beautiful morning at the AIC. Warm ups were the usual mix but focused on the upper body. Specifically shoulders in support for our recovering sling brothers, Einstein and Turbo. The deck of cards with the Can Do logo came out again. Each suit represented an exercise and each card dictated the reps 2-14. Hearts were hand release merkins. Diamonds were bouncy squats. Spades were gas pumps. Clubs were LBC’s. Hammer, Fletch and Frank the Tank led the cadence on their respective suit. Thanks for their help. Each of the 2 jokers had the PAX go across the parking lot doing Starjacks or lunges. These are favorites from our missing sling brothers. Nameorama. Hammer strongly prayed us out.

  • Krazy Ivan IV: Speedy Sings, Fracsac Frowns – from The Hammer

    It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair…for Fracsac apparently. The man who has a folder on his phone dedicated to the Freedom Hammer was crestfallen for a second year running. Bordering on tearful, Fracsac and his Southshore breathern had to witness a spritely Speedy Gonzales hoist the Freedom Hammer in triumph after the Northshore thumped the Southshore for the Crazy Ivan IV, 257 to 153. Precision results, thoroughly vetted and audited by the governing body, are as follows:

    1. Speedy Gonzales 31:22 (6:30 average pace)-recruited years ago by Jose 10k
    2. Amnesia 33:55
    3. In Time 34:07
    3. Cowbell 34:07
    5. The Hammer 34:34
    6. Saban 35:09
    7. Kuch 35:37
    8. Steve 36:45
    9. TankedUp! 37:20
    10. RevSox 37:36
    11. Sogo 37:47
    12. Hog’s Breath 40:25
    13. Thumb War 41:30
    14. Bongo (time between 41:30 and 42:43-you should have found me afterwards Bongo!)
    15. Snooze 42:43
    16. Pelican 42:44
    17. Shooter 43:34
    18. Flea 45:16
    19. BBQ 46.35
    20. Russo 46:55
    21. Jose 10k 47:38
    22. Pai Gow 49:55
    23. Baywatch (it was raining hard, lots was happening, Hog’s Breath was talking to me…sorry Baywatch I didn’t get your time)
    24. Belloq
    25. JV (not that JV, the other one) 55:19
    26. Kenner Brah
    27. McGiver

    And honorable mentions to PickAxe and Chainsaw, The Hammer’s 2.0s, who finished the first lap together in a blistering 13 minutes.

    Thanks for coming out guys. You all get a trophy for participating in this unequivocally, completely stupid and utterly pointless annual competition. YHC was thoroughly impressed with the total disregard for your personal wellbeing and safety and looks forward to a repeat performance same time next year. Over and out.

  • Another Cakewalk – from Russo

    Hurricane Ida wrecked a lot of plans this year. She did a lot of damage, broke a lot of hearts, made life a ton more difficult. But one thing I’ve learned is that even in the darkest of hours, God can find a way to turn something terrible into something good.

    I don’t want to belittle the struggle our region is still dealing with, and I can tell you firsthand there is a lot of work left. But I can also tell you firsthand that God has given us an opportunity to grow together, help each other, and all in all, be better people.

    My original plan for the first week in September was to do a birthday Q, and following the lead of Grundy and/or Zoolander (depending on how good an idea it was), complete another “Cake walk” and hope it catches on as a thing.

    Well, those plans changed due to Mother Nature, but God’s timing is perfect, so a pax of 17 said “Take Two” under beautiful weather with low humidity and temps topping out at around 71.

    Warmup (between 10x and 20x, all IC)
    Seal jacks
    Toe touches
    Arm circles
    Torso twists
    Goofballs

    Thang: A cakewalk, your basic descending ladder of exercises and reps, starting at YHC’s age (in this case, 43), and work your way to 1, with some moseying in between around Old Mandeville/Lakefront.

    The order:

    43 High knees
    42 SSHs
    41 Plank Jacks
    40 merkins (where Bird started to wonder where the burpees were)
    39 squats
    38 Hello Dollies
    37 Calf raises
    36 Apollo ohnos
    35 Freak Nastys
    34 step ups
    33 flutter kicks
    32 butt kicks (2 is 1) (lead IC by the entire pax rotating, very nice job, gents!)
    31 Peter Parker’s (2 is 1)
    30 imperial walkers
    29 Shoulder taps (2 is 1)
    28 American hammers
    27 George thoroughgood
    26 Smurf jacks
    25 leg raises
    24 Rosalitas
    23 crab jacks (crab position – opposite plank jacks)
    22 groiners
    21 Bear crawls
    20 murder bunnies
    19 Hand release merkins
    18 Bobby Hurley’s
    17 crab cakes (2 is 1)
    16 circle ups
    15 Bulgarian split squats
    14 durkins
    13 big boy sit-ups
    12 LMCs
    11 diamond merkins
    10 star jumps
    9 donkey kicks
    8 8 count body builders
    7 makhtar n’jais
    6 6 inch drills (where Zoolander was wise to my plan)
    5 Carolina dry docks
    4 Bonnie Blair’s
    3 jump squats
    2 burpees (here they are Bird!)
    1 minute plank

    COT, name-o-rama, announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    This Q doubled as my 3 year anniversary Q, so it’s time for me to again thank Toto for EH’ing me. Like I suspect has happened to many of us, I had no idea what I was in for. I showed up late to my first beatdown (Splice was Q) and quickly wondered what I got myself into. Manny’s words to me were “just stick with it” and he was right.

    More than once, I was the 6. I’m still the 6 on occasion. But each and every time, someone is there to pick me (or you) up. Tanked up was the first I remember. Shooter seems to do it the most (especially on moseys).

    And that’s what makes this group of men so darn solid. What started out as “I could use the exercise” or “I want to get back in shape” quickly turns to something more.

    The F for Fitness is lowercase. The other two are uppercase. I’ve enjoyed laughing with you all, especially when Hammer gets a pax going with his 80’s references, or Zoolander makes an off color joke about doing a Freddy Mercury. You each have enriched me, made me a better person, lended guidance, and just in general have been a blast to be around.

    Before I started, I didn’t have a lower back that constantly aches or stiffens up, nor did I have a left shoulder that tells me “That’s enough merkins for today.” I didn’t even know I had an Achilles’ tendon.

    But it has all been worth it. Ever nagging pain and shortness of breath: worth it knowing I’m making a decision to better myself as a leader, a Christian, a productive member of society. And that’s due to each of you, whether I called you by name above or not. Because finally, after 3 years, I think I’ve learned your real names, which is maybe a bigger compliment.