Warmup
Run to Wisner and back tree weave
Three exercises: legs core arms – 15 each
situp punches
squats
merkins
American hammers
Lunges
derkins
v ups
Bobby Hurley
Decline shoulder taps 2 is 1
Bicycle crunches legs straight
Bonnie Blair
Push up with Nolan Ryan
Pax choice
Sunday mornings
IN THE COURT OF PUBLIC OPINION FOR THE REGION OF NEW ORLEANS
F3 NATION, et al.
Plaintiffs,
v.
F3 NOLA, JINGLE VADER (Q), et al.
Defendants
Civil Action No. 24-0001
DEFENDANTS’ MOTION TO DISMISS COMPLAINT
In the matter of F3 NOLA vs. F3 Nation, the defendants, hereafter referred to as F3 NOLA, hereby move for dismissal of the charges brought forth by F3 Nation. The allegations assert that individuals participating in workouts at Wolfpack Mountain fail to produce a summary of their activities, commonly referred to as a “Backblast.”
I. Grounds for Dismissal:
1. The defendants plead that their reluctance to provide a Backblast is rooted in their status as Luddites, demonstrating an aversion to modern technological practices.
2. F3 NOLA asserts that their indifference extends beyond matters unrelated to Uptown New Orleans, rendering the requirement for a Backblast irrelevant to their operational ethos.
3. The defendants argue that the language employed in workouts is often unsuitable for a professional environment, thus justifying their refusal to produce such documentation.
4. F3 NOLA contends that the imposition of Backblasts may inadvertently subject them to unwarranted scrutiny regarding allegations of child abuse, posing a potential risk to their reputation.
5. The defendants maintain that their objection to Backblasts is grounded in their general aversion to being directed or supervised, asserting their autonomy in matters related to workout documentation.
In light of the aforementioned grounds, F3 NOLA respectfully requests this Honorable Court to grant the motion to dismiss, thereby absolving them of the charges brought forth by F3 Nation and allowing them to focus on Side Straddle Hops, Low Slow Squats, Burpees, Hillbillies, Blimp Ladders, Dora and Mary (which includes Twisties).
Dated: January 12, 2024
Respectfully submitted,
JINGLE VADER
Workout Q
:HC
366 days ago I saw my father alive for the last time. Taking a queue from Saban, I thought it’d be a good idea to Q as a way to remember him and to give myself some perspective on the gift of life I still have. I would have done it the day of, but the 28th would have been 610 Stomp so I figured what’s one day.
Warmup: some number of SSH, Grass Grabbers, Windmills, Arm Circles, Mountain Climbers, IWs.
Workout: Tabata. The app I use doesn’t allow for increments outside of 5’s so I couldn’t do my planned 72/28 (72, my dad’s age at passing, 28, the day he passed) so I opted for 70/25.
Music: Some Spotify Playlist titled “60’s-70’s Mix” but they definitely snuck in Huey Lewis & the News so, let’s call it a grab bag of 60’s-80’s.
3 Rounds of 8 Excercises with 1 minute recovery between rounds.
Round 1:
Decline Merkins on the block
LBCs with block
Squats
Overhead Press
Right Hand Rows
Block Swings
Heavy Freddy
Calf Raises on the block or holding the block
At Kuch’s encouragement, I shared some fun stories about my dad. This one was my dad forbidding my family from eating at R&O’s ever again after he lost the Grand Isle Tarpon Rodeo when a fisherman caught a Tarpon in Lake Ponchartrain in his nets and was encouraged by the owner of the restaurant to drive it down to the Rodeo. He did, and weighed it in as the winner. We never ate at R&Os again.
Round 2:
Incline Merkins on the block
Big Boy Situps with feet in the block
Skull Crushers on your six
Curls
Left Arm Rows
Walleyes (seated or standing)
Right Legged Wife Pleasers (foot on the block)
Left Legged Wife Pleasers (foot on the block)
This story involved my dad getting arrested in 1998 for attempting to bring a gun on a commercial flight to Florida. He was going fishing in Key West with some friends and my mom packed his bag for him, unaware that the bag had a false bottom where he stashed his .38. Security found it and it scuttled the trip and also gave my school’s principal a lot of fun firepower the rest of my 8th grade year. Thankfully this was all explained away pretty easily and there were no charges pressed. What a glorious time the 90’s were! I also speculated that perhaps my father was D.B. Cooper.
Round 3:
8 Count Body Builders
Flutter Kicks with block
Step Ups
Box Cutters with block
Normal Rows
Thrusters
LBCs
Curls
COT: Prayers for Tool’s father as he shared with us that his health is waning. Also prayers for Abacus’ mother, who also passed on March 28th 3(?) years ago. Even as we age, losing our parents is never easy, as I’ve learned this past year. There’s a childlike part of our brains that just expects them to always be there, even when we know they cannot.
As an aside, I want to share how much F3 has meant to me in my grieving and reflection this last 6 months.
I was at a birthday party for a friend’s daughter when Jesus Juice asked me how I was doing. An innocuous question we ask each other thousands of times but for some reason, that day I was open and honest with him: “Not great.”
He offered to me to come workout on Monday, and for some reason, I did. Since then I’ve poured a lot of myself into fitness and diet, and I’ve achieved a lot of wins but most importantly, I’ve started to feel like someone I haven’t felt like in a long time. There’s encouragement and fraternity here and I’m forever grateful for his kindness that day.
Additional thanks to my regular brothers at AO-CityPark, Kuch, Saban, Abacus, YaMomAnEm, Snooze, Mama’s Pride, High Rise and many more.
Rest in Peace, Pops. <3
Warm up with movement – Walking Imperial Walkers (AKA Gabby’s) , Bear Crawl, Crab Walks – IC around the NOMA bacon fountain.
Face the Bacon for Jack Off/Jacked Up- SSH, Smurf Jacks, Red Bull Smurf Jacks, Plank Jacks – seal the deal with some Seal jacks – I thought the F3 Exicon called a variety of jumping jacks a “Jack Off”. I was mistaken as it is called “Jacked Up” Next time I will add in the Wacky Jack and some other variations. Seal the deal with Seal Team 6 – Six Seal Burpees (burpee with two merkins) in cadence.
Ladder of Seal Burpees – Running from NOMA to the end of Lelong Drive we performed a ladder of Seal Burpees – 10, 8, 6, 4, 2, 4.
Ultimate Football Mosey – Using an actual 1999 LSU practice football that no longer holds air we passed the football while moseying to the Tool Wall for some calf exercises. Any drop and there were several the pax performed two Seal Burpees. Ultimate Football mosey to the back of NOMA for 3 rounds of Sunday Mornings.
COT
YHC pulled up to the Renaissance AO 4 minutes early and found Wapner to be the lonely Pax, but now we were 2! The flag was planted, a disclaimer given, and face the bacon for the warmup. 2 more pax filtered in during the warmup.
With 4 of us, YHC grabbed the 60 lb sandbag known as Sweetness plus a new toy….a 53 lb sand kettlebell! Partner up for Dora 1..2..3.
100 burpees
200 Big Boi Sit-ups
300 Squats
Partner 2 grabs one of the ladies and goes one quarter way around NOMA and back.
During this evolution Pax #5 showed up and got in on the action.
Stations:
Burpees x10 (timer)
Sandbag Cleans with Sweetness (AMRAP)
Jump rope (AMRAP)
Kettlebell swings (AMRAP)
Step ups (AMRAP)
Sunday Mornings with 3 minutes to go!
CoT
Great start to the week!
SYITG
YHC finished hanging drywall on Saturday AM at 1100 and looked and saw a Q-less Renaissance on Sunday but would not HC
YHC finished working at Charlie’s on Saturday PM at 2300 and looked and saw a still Q-less Renaissance on Sunday but still would not HC
YHC got up at 0530 Sunday AM and looked and saw a still Q-less Renaissance on Sunday and decided to step up and HC
As 0630 approached six pax, including Smooth, in from Spain; new pax member, Wapner; our N’antan, Fraq; PVC & MacGyver.
We started with a disclaimer and welcome and Warmorama of SSH x 20, Slow Vigodas x 10 and grass grabbers x 15. While warming up 2 additional pax, Abacus & Vagabond, arrived.
The THANG –
15’s
15 Burpess & 15 Mountain Climbers
Then Mosey to Green box and
15 American Hammers & 15 big Boi sit up
Run back to NOMA
repeat with round of 14’s 14 & 14 mosey to green box 14 & 14, mosey to NOMA
Rinse and repeat for rounds of 13, 12, 11….
At 0710 we gathered around “the bacon” for 25 “foot release” squats (squat to seated position and lift knees as high as possible) & 25 hand release merkins
At 0714 we went up the stairs to “enjoy” Sunday Mornings against front wall of NOMA
At 0715 we gathered for countarama, nameorama, announcements & prayer.
Thank you for the opportunity to lead
