F3 New Orleans

Category: Northshore

  • Full-On Irish Beatdown

    Inspired by St. Patrick’s use of a shamrock to explain the mystery of the Trinitarian God, we soothed our anxious souls in the gloom this morning with a full-on Irish, trinitarian beatdown.

    Warm-ups were SSH, Seal jacks, arm circles, Windmill’s IW’s, high knees, and butt kicks. Then, after a moseyed lap we were back to the splash pad for the thang: three routines, each with three parts (shamrock-style).

    First: partners work together to complete 100 Merkins, 200 LBC’s, and 300 squats. While one did 10 Merkins, the other held a plank, then switched until 100 were done. Then, while one did 20 LBC’s, the other did a 6″ leg lift/hold until 200 completed. And, while one did 25 squats, the other held Al Gore position until 300 were done.

    Second: same partners–one ran up the stairs, around, and down while the other chipped away at 100 freak-nasties, 100 box jumps, and 100 walk-up incline Merkins on the benches.

    Third: each man for himself–sprint the length of the columns, then turn around and crab walk the length of three columns before gator crawling the length of two columns. Rinse and repeat for three times total. Competition was heavy, as was the breathing.

    Bonus: Chumba-burpees–played the song, “Tubthumping” by Chumbawumba since they are an Irish band whose lyrics only make sense to the natives of the Emerald Isle. SSH’s for the duration except for burpees every time they said “I get knocked down, but I get up again”. After the previous exercises, the SSH’s were the worst part…at first.

    Tempted to call it two minutes early, YHC decided instead to offer up a set of Freddy Mercury’s and box cutters for the Southshore F3 community since they’ve had to cancel for an undetermined time.

    On a serious note, it was truly a blessing to be able to post this morning during such turbulent times when everything seems to be out of our control. Having the chance to choose to run a little harder, to do one more burpee, to push through when everything in me wants to stop, and to have other men challenging and supporting me is a gift I’m not taking for granted. It’s an intense reminder that there is always something I can control: myself. I can control how much I’m willing to give, to keep pushing forward, and to choose to be a man for others, for something bigger than me despite the circumstances.

    Thank God for F3 and for you men. He will lead us forward.

    See you in the gloom,

    Goose

  • 50 Reasons to Come Out and Play

    As the clock turned 6:30, the pacs who dared to walk outside during the corona virus hysteria, could not help but notice the coupons that were awaiting them for the beat down. But before we get to that, let’s warm up……

    Forward arm circles – 10 IC, Reverse arm circles -10 IC, Overhead Claps – 10 IC, Cherry Pickers – 10 IC, Air presses – 10IC

    At this point there were murmurs among-st the group in regards to my choice of warm up exercises given the coupons that were awaiting them, but those murmurs fell on def ears of the Q.

    Side Straddle Hops – 10 IC, High Knees – 10 IC, Butt Kicks – 10 IC, Imperial Walkers – 10 IC, 10 Merkins – OYO, 10 Plank Jacks – OYO, 10 Groiners – OYO, 10 Eight Count Body Builders – IC

    For those pacs that did not attend this beat down, but are wondering what the coupons could have been. Well read no further, 50 lb Bags of Sand. Each pac gets a partner. Each team of two is responsible for getting their 50 lb bag of sand to the shaft. Pac 1 to carries bag one block, while other pac ran ahead and planked until partner got there. Rinse and repeat until you arrive at shaft. Every one planks until 6 gets there, which in this case, and most cases, was yours truly.

    Keeping with the theme of 50 for 50 lb bags of sand, I kept the reps at 50 for the next group of exercises.

    Keeping your same partner, Pac 1 will run from shaft to designated oak tree and back while other pac performs burpees with bag of sand. Bag gets lifted to shoulders after merkin and groiner of burpee is performed, and bag is than pressed above head at end of burpee. Each team performs 50 in total.

    With same partner, Pac 1 will carry bag of sand overhead with arms extended to same oak tree and back while partner performs crunchy frogs. Rinse and repeat until 50 crunchy frogs are completed between both partners.

    At this point, I could see that the 50 lbs were literally weighing down the group. I decided to quote the great 6 time Olympia Winner, Dorian Yates in an attempt to rally the troops. “Muscle growth is an adaptation to stress.” Not sure if that helped, but I am just a Dorian Yates fan.

    Pac 1 bear crawls to oak tree and runs back to shaft. Before taking off on bear crawl, Pac 1 places the bag of sand on their partners back, so that they can perform merkins. Rinse and repeat until 50 merkins are completed between both partners.

    Time for some Mary…..At this point, many were thinking, yes, some Mary. We get a break from the bag of sand, not so much…..

    Stay with same partner. Partner one performs LMCs – 20 IC while holding bag of sand above their head. Partner two holds plank at elbows until LMCs are completed. . Partners trade off and perform same exercises

    Exercise #2 for Mary was a modification of dead cock roaches. While performing dead cock roaches, the bag of sand is held above head, 20 IC. Partner without bag performs flutter kicks, 20 IC. Partners trade off and perform same exercises. I knew I struck gold with the modified dead cock roached when I heard Grundy say, “These are tough.”

    With only ten minutes to go, I wanted to get a competition in before the beat down was over. Pacs broke into two teams. Object of competition was to see who could stack the bags of sand the fastest without the bags falling over. If your tower of sand fell over, you automatically lost. Only rules were that only one pac could move bag(s) of sand at a time, and the next pac could not touch or move a bag(s) of sand until the previous pac returned. Team 1 got smoked. They finished in 2 minutes and 9 seconds. Team 2, with a FRESH Capt Sparkles, finished in 59 seconds. Zoolander did his best by knocking over their tower of sand before Capt placed the last bag on top. Good effort Zoolander, but we got beat.

    At this point in the beat down, those 50 lb bags of sand had changed to anywhere from 0 to 45 lbs. Thank Goodness. In a collective effort, all packs were able to get remaining bags back to flag by swapping off between each other. Team Work makes the Dream Work. Kudos to Baby Yoda for powering his weigh through this work out. At 68 lbs, he was carrying, pulling, pushing and bag of sand that was nearly 75% of his body weight. The force is strong in that one Bush Wacker.

    The Manny Prayed us out!!!!!

  • The Time Trial That Never Was

    Waterpik was waiting in his wagon-dragger; YHC was parking askew; Akbar was approaching with a headlight out that he kept remembering to forget to change; Cowbell was nearing, earnestly on time; Burgundy was sneaking up irregularly – regularly late….and Shooter was sleeping through his alarm.

    WARMORAMA

    x10-15 IC: High Knees, Windmills, Torso Twists, Scorpion Kicks, Fire Hydrants

    THANG

    With the regular route on tap this gloom (plus Cowbell’s marathon-training scheduled lagniappe), the crew of rambling scramblers took off at an unintentional and surprising slightly sub-8:00 pace. A mile in, Cowbell took off for the first of his 6 1-minute sprints, YHC found his pace quickening a tic, and the rest of the PAX settled into a 3 man pack going 8:15-8:35 discussing the mouth-gaping happenings in the world of sports and the world at large resulting from the Covid-19 calamity.

    MARY

    As Cowbell ran back and forth past the flag like a lab rat trpped in a straight tunnel, the PAX first took turns doing 10 pull ups while the rest alternated between Freak Nasties and Merkins. After 2 rounds, we switched to Hanging Knee Ups while doing Freddy Mercuries and Flutter Kicks

    COT

    Count, Name, Waterpik Prayed us out into a fist-bumpin’ day in our fistbumpin’ world.

    REMINDER: the 1st F3 Northshore Lunch will be tomorrow, Friday 3/13/20, at Whole Foods at noon.

  • Leg Day

    Still smarting from the Downpainment put forth on the Lakefront by Akbar on Saturday, YHC was looking for a reprieve from upper extremity soreness to start the week.

    So, with that in mind, LEGS were the order of the day.

    Mosey to Lakefront stopping at each intersection for: Jump squats, Mountain Climbers, Peter Parkers, Flutter Kicks and SMKs.

    Mosey to Marigny for some speed work. Split the PAX into 2 groups. Object is to go around Noah’s Ark as fast as you can. Rinse and repeat and hold plank while your partner Circled Noah’s Ark. After 2 rounds, YHC, fully exhausted, called off the 3rd set and Hit the Seawall for: Bulgarian Split Squats.

    With time running out, it was time to Mosey back to the Marsh making just in time before the Bell sounded

    COT and thanks to Goose for praying us out.

    SYITG

  • “Q” Quarantined

    Having returned on Saturday to an email stating you will not be able to return to work for 14 days.. YHC jumped on the Q sheet as to get back in the routine of things.. Having hit the gym only twice while on vacation, this morning would prove to be a tough one..

    warmup

    IC 15 Toe Touches, Torso twists, Windmills.

    IC 20 Mummy kicks, Butt kicks, SSH.

    thang

    Consisted of Walls of Jericho with incorporated B.(Groiner)L.I.M.P.S… 7 rounds with 7 reps for each exercise with a lap around the trailhead for completion.. R/R 7X. Upon completion had 2 mins remaining to finish with Little Manny crunches (sure to see more on Saturday) and Cowbells go to of Crunchy Frog IC 15..

    👏🏻 To Zoolander for praying us out..

    Till the next Gloom 👍🏻👊🏻✌🏻

  • Episode 3: It’s a (MERKIN) Trap

    Date: 3/7/2020

    QIC: Akbar

    PAX: Backdraft, Barely Legal, Bart, Bean, Moby Dick, Grover, Hammer, Hogcycle, Jose 10K, Rev Sox, Russo, Steve, Tanked Up, The Manny, Waterpick, Zoolander

    After Admiral Akbar masterminded the rebel attack on the second Death Star, he shows up light-years later to join General Leia’s fight against the tyranny of the First Order. During an epic battle with Kylo Ren at the helm, a huge explosion hits the bridge, and the most esteemed military commander of his generation was gone. Or was he?

    Secret Intel from the Mon Calamari is leaked, and Akbar actually escaped with Leia using THE FORCE. Akbar travels to the Milky Way Galaxy and the land of milk and honey – returning to the Northshore Mothership – leading the rebels against Darth Fartsack and the Sad Clown Empire.

    He could not do it alone. Key Resistance fighters were AWOL this gloom – such as Baby Yoda, Shooter, Maverick, Goose, Chewy, Bushwhacker and Captain Sparkles. Luckily, @hawgcycle and @revsox joined the Rebels from a not so distant galaxy across the lake.       

    Gloom Factor:  slightly chilly, but sunny.  Yellow Stardust (pollen) in the air made YHC take the pink pill (Benadryl) in addition to the red pill this morning

    Warmorama:  not so much

    Thang: The MERKINFEST begins

    Start at the flag.  Mosey to Harbor Field with stops at Noah’s Ark, Lamarque Wall, and Splash Pad

    4 sets of 2 exercises, a mixture of 12/8/5 double count reps or 24 16 8 single count OYO

    Total count 50 reps per exercise unless otherwise noted

    SSH | Merkins IC

    Lunge Walk | Diamond Merkins OYO

    Wall Jumps | Derkins OYO

    Slow Squat | Stone Mountain Merkins IC

    Spaceball @ Harbor Field

    YHC had a feeling something was missing from this beatdown, and added Pull Ups to the delight of the bicep driven Zoolander. We needed bigger guns to continue the fight.

    5 Stations, 16 reps each. Run to next base after exercise completion until finished

    1st base                 Superman Merkins

    2nd base                Big Boy Sit-ups

    3rd base                 Wide Merkins

    Home                    Burpees

    Outfield                  Pull ups (AKA Zoolander’s)

    Mosey back to the flag with stops at the Wall and Rips

    Freak Nasties | Irkin IC

    50 LBC | 50 Calf Raises OYO

    Imperial Walkers | Merkins IC

    Mary

    Hello Dolly x 15

    20 Merkins OYO

    Lay flat on your back and stare at the sky for a minute

    At this point, YHC was at the end of the pain train, breathless from counting, and decided to give the other Rebels a chance to lead to close us out.

    2nd Mary

    X 20 each

    Hammer                Crunchy Frogs

    Bean                      Flutter Kicks

    Grover                   LBC’s

    Steve                     Leg Raises

    Tanked Up            Frankenstein/Mummy kicks – can’t really explain – more like an 80’s dance than an exercise – but requires extreme coordination which only Tank seemed to have. Sure to be exciting to onlookers.

    Count | Name-o-Rama

    COT – Prayers of thanks and safety, asking for opportunities to influence others for good this week.

    Tally ended up at 860 reps per man, including @ 400 Merkins each – well done gentlemen.

    Thanks for the opportunity to lead, and be a part of this group.

    ANNOUNCEMENTS

    Whole Food Friday lunches start next week – more info to come on GroupMe

  • The Return of Captain Sparkles!

    An unexpected hero materialized out of the gloom this morning: Captain Sparkles, the firefighting leader of men with his amulet of FD power returned to show the PAX how a real man carries another man through a tunnel.

    Warm-ups were SSH, Windmills, Arm Circles, IW’s and Butt Kicks. Then, we moseyed to the tunnel for the thang that YHC has been dreading for two days:

    THANG: Basic premise is moving through the tunnel using a variety of methods with 10 burpees after each. All methods of forward progress (except the alligator crawl, which could only be completed halfway up the opposite ramp) were accomplished on both the down and up ramps with a short, slow-mosey break on the flat part at the bottom, and each followed by 10 burpees at the top.

    Started with lunge walk, then crab walk, then partner carry, flapjacking for a second round after burpees. This is where Captain Sparkles’ years of fire rescue skills left YHC in the dust carrying Zoolander on his back, confidently riding like an ostrich-jockey (metaphor provided by Hammer). Next was the brutal alligator crawl, followed by back-pedal, then sprint, and finally bear crawls (and 80 burpees overall).

    After arriving back to the flag two minutes over time, COT, and Hammer prayed us out.

    Thanks, gents, for your willingness to persevere and for giving YHC a reason to finish what we started this morning.

    See you in the gloom!

  • Episode II: I Am Your Father Yoda! OR Ain’t Nobody Humpin’ Around

    For the 2nd time in a week, 10 year old Baby Yoda stepped up to lead the Northshore PAX, this time co-Qing with his pappy, YHC. His reflections the following day (other than “Owww I’m sore”) were, “That was fun,” and, “I like telling the old guys what to do.” Well this is one old guy who likes anyone telling him what to do, so long as it results in good times and growth. And speaking of…

    PRE-THANG

    Being the last Saturday of RRR, these 2 miles held more desperate relevance to some than to others, but regardless, it was as strong a showing as ever.

    WARM-O-RAMA

    BY started us off with x15 IC:

    SSH, Imperial Walkers, Cherry Pickers, Mountain Climbers, Plank Jacks

    x5 T Merkins OYO

    x5 Burpess OYO

    THANG

    Mosey to the Gazebo for:

    A round of 100 Circle Burps while holding Al Gore,

    A round of 100 Circle Merkins while holding Plank

    Mosey to the Unit where it was time for Pappa’s Brand New Bag as QIC 2 handed back off to QIC 1 for the Tripple Check:

    In groups of 3, 1st man sprints 50 yards out and 50 back, while 2nd man holds plank and 3rd man hold Al Gore. Upon returning 1st man get to the back of the line and into Al Gore and so on. Repeat for 3 rounds.

    Mosey to Lafitte where the PAX of 19 circled up once again, this time for Circle Travolta Merkins – Merkin, 1-arm Plank with right arm high, reach under and accross body, and back up before returning to plank. Around the circle once, then reverse direction back this time with left arm high.

    With only one PAX within quick moseying distance, it was a fairly brief run as it was time for the inaugural Tour de Humpers! Mosey north on Lafitte where, upon reaching the corner of Lafitte/Claiborne PAX did 10 Burpees(?) OYO. Continued on for another 100 feet before reaching Casa de Breve`, disturbing Mrs. Breve`, and lining up across the street facing (with an upside down view) Steve’s gracious M for x20 IC Monkey Humpers!

    Ain’t nobody humpin’ around!

    Back on course to Claiborne /Girod for another exercise, and one last stop at our former coffeeteria site, Kona, to show them what F3 Northshore thinks of their “toxic” environment.

    MARY

    Back at the flag earlier than planned, co-Q’s laid forth an abdominal smack down for 15 minutes that was certain to have hit its mark.

    COT

    Count/Name/Our mysterious F3 “out-of-town” stranger prayed us out in his slightly baritone, solemn country twang before fading back into the gloom.

    On behalf of myself and Baby Yoda, many thanks, gentlemen, for following our lead and providing the example of strength and unity that so many men, especially myself, need in their life.

  • Mosey You Shall

    A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away….

    It is a period of civil war. A young rebel PAX, striking from the hidden base of Wacker Fortress, stepped forth to claim his 1st victory against the evil empty Q sheet.

    During the battle, rebel spies witnessed IC x15: Cherry Pickers, Imperial Walkers, Torso Twists, High knees, and Squats done with enough power to destroy an entire planet.

    Pursued by the Empire’s sinister agents, the PAX races along the usual Mandeville route aboard their swift feet, custodians of the stolen plans that can save their people and restore freedom to F3 Northshore…

    Upon their return, they each did reps at an exercise station while 2 men did 5 Burpees, 10 Freak Nasties, and 15 Squats – then rotated.

    With the Empire still at their heels, the rebel PAX counted off, name o rama, and were lead safely out of evil’s reach by Hammer.

    It is still a dark time for F3 Northshore. Although the Death Star has been destroyed, imperial troops have driven Baby Yoda from his hidden base in Big Branch and pursued him across St. Tammany Parish.

    Evading the dreaded imperial star fleet, a group of freedom fighters lead by Baby Yoda, Bushwacker, Steve, Goose, and the other F3 rebels has established new Q sign ups on the desolate and icy Q sheet.

    The evil Lord Darth Fartsack, obsessed with keeping the Q sheet empty, has dispatched thousands of remote probes into the far reaches of the northshore to find out why so many PAX are refusing to put forth the down PAINMENT as a leader of men…. as 10 year old Baby Yoda has…..

    Stay tuned for Episode VI: Return of the Jedi, Saturday at the Lakefront

  • Round Robin

    With no one signed up to Q, 8 PAX assembled at the Gipper for a Round Robin..

    Shooter: (warmup)

    IC 15 Imperial walkers, Toe touches, Cherry pickers, Air presses.

    IC 20 Butt kicks, SSH and 20 OYO Mercans..

    Jose 10k:

    Moseyed the PAX to the Justice center for what he remembered most from a former post, in which Turbo introduced us to the ramps with an unorthodox way of ascension 😩.. Partnered up 100, 200 and 300 Mercans, Squats and LBCs. P1 kept the rep count as P2 laterally bear crawled up the ramps utilizing the hand railings.. With 20 mins remaining baton passes too….

    Cowbell:

    B.L.I.M.P.S

    (Burpees, Lunges, Imperial walkers, Mercans, Plank Jacks, Squats)

    Reps 10, 20 (each leg so 40), 30 (actually 60), 40, 50 and 60.. Between each exercise PAX ascended a Mosey up stairwell of the parking garage and backdown… Moseyed back for the close with…

    Grover:

    20 IC Flutter kicks and Crunchy frogs..

    👏🏻 To Barely Legal for prayers and reflection of the start of the Lenton season…

    👍🏻👊🏻✌🏻 Till the next Gloom