F3 New Orleans

Tag: Scantron

  • Nothing Fancy, Just Grinding it Out – from Baywatch

    The rain missed us on Sunday and spared the PAX at Pontiff. It would have been a wet, muddy, and cold morning otherwise. Instead, the cooler temp was pleasant with an 18 mph breeze, so YHC made sure the workout wasn’t so pleasant. We headed over to the rock pile for a warmup.

    SSH 25 IC
    Mountain Climbers 25 IC
    Imperial walkers 25 IC
    Hillbillies 25 IC
    Arm Circles 15 IC (both directions)
    Grass Grabbers 10 IC

    With the warmup complete, everyone grabbed their obligatory rock and headed to the field.

    The Thang

    Grab a dance partner. While one partner is doing the rock exercise, the other partner runs to the 50 yard line and back. Then switch.

    100 over head presses
    200 curls
    300 chest presses
    400 flutter kicks

    I must admit, the curls were brutal. Although, my rock choice sure didn’t help. This took a little longer than expected so YHC cut short the next exercise. With a few minutes left, we lined up on the goal line. We bear crawled to the 20 yard line, did 5 burpees and bear crawled backed. Then we did the same thing to the 10 yard line and back.

    With rocks returned and all PAX back at the flag, we did some low slow squats and merkins IC to close out the morning.

  • Lucky Bear vs Form Police – from King Kong

    Q vs Q on 1/7/2022

    Our Department had been receiving calls for months about a group of “guys” working out at 5:30 a.m in Kenner. The complaints were never about the noise or other nuisances, but they were about the form. He complained about the push ups…. (they call it “Merks or Merkins”), squats, lunges, burpees, and the list goes on. I recognized his voice every time he called. I couldn’t ignore his complaints anymore since he was so persistent and passionate about the form. As Lieutenant King Kong from the Form Police Department, I showed up on 1/7/2022 ready to hand out citations.

    Upon arrival, I noticed 13 other “guys” (they call themselves “Pax”) showed up promptly on a cold, chilly, windy morning. While I was introducing myself to the Pax and why I was there…. One of the Pax called himself “Rudy” aka Lucky Bear was challenging and questioning me like he was defending his turf.

    A Kenner Native named “Mambi” led a warm up with jumping jacks (they call it “side straddle hops”), windmills (aka “Abe Vigoda”), and a stretch named “grass grabbers.”

    I saw an opportunity to take the lead after Mambi was done with the warmups. I called out another Kenner Native – Mahatma to demonstrate the proper form of a Merkin…. then Gabrielle with squats. After the demonstrations, I led the Pax with 10 merkins, ran to the stop sign, did 10 squats, ran back. When I noticed bad forms, I blew my whistle and everyone had to do 5 burpees. We did that for about 2 rounds… then Lucky Bear interrupted me by telling the Pax to grab a “coupon”, which is a cinder block, and headed towards the levee.

    At the levee, we did something called Gorilla. With a coupon, PAX performed the following OYO without stop: 8 Curls For Girls, 8 Rows, 8 Overhead Presses, 8 Chest Presses, then drop coupon followed this up by a quick mosey over the levee and back. Rinse and repeat until Lucky Bear yelled “halt.” Afterwards, we did few rounds of king kong with the coupon up and down the levee until Lucky Bear yelled halt again.

    At this point, I’m getting tired of Lucky Bear’s nonsense… so I gathered the Pax away from the levee and redirected their focus back on form, but this time with the coupon. We did 7’s (one side with a manmaker, ran to the stop sign and did squats). About half way through, I was interrupted again by Lucky Bear. He must have loved my idea of 7’s. He instructed the Pax to do “Lucky 7’s” – 7 burpees follow with an exercise of his choice in one minute for seven minutes nonstop. I blew my whistle couple times when I noticed his bad form.

    By the end of this, Mambi had enough and halted the entire workout because the environment felt like Form Police versus Lucky Bear. The group voted that I was the winner…. didn’t even know I was in a competition. Now I was asked by the Pax to come back out to Kenner in a month and challenge someone else. They called this “Q vs Q.” I called this a sucker bet to get me out to Kenner at 5:30 a.m. Since I don’t mind getting back out here, only fitting for me to challenge the caller who filed all these complaints. He is Triple Shift.

    Side notes worth mentioning – Fracsac showed up in a Godzilla costume looking for King Kong. Willie is the one who gave me the idea to be Form Police. But the Oscar award winning acting and calling out Triple Shift…. That’s all me.

    Blessed and honored to lead a Q vs Q workout. SYITG.

    King Kong

  • The Center of Attention – from Hawgcycle

    Conditions: Cloudy, 55 degrees, Humidity 81%, Wind 0.2 mph from the East

    Pax: The Bogé, Crypto-tron, The Champ, Pebbles, Lane Kiffin Fan Boy, Clayton Money, The Real Triple Shift, Extrinsic Muscles, The Black MABA, War Daddy, and YHC

    Mosey to the football field where YHC took his rightful place as the Center of Attention

    Warm-Up
    • SSH x 31, IW x 20, Don Quixote x 10
    • 20 Burpees OYO
    • Peter Parker x 15, Parker Peter x 20, Good Mornings x 10
    • 12 Burpees EMOM x 5
    • Forward Alternating Lunges x 10
    • 10 Burpees OYO
    • Backerds Alternating Lunges x 10…repeat with better form
    • 10 Burpees OYO

    The Thang
    • Jack Webb – Merkins:Air Presses, 1:2 -> 10:20
    • Right leg balancing (Tree Pose -> Table -> Morestead)
    • 10! (Merkins -> Lunges -> Big Bois)
    • Left leg balancing (Tree Pose -> Table -> Morestead)
    • Jack Webb – Squats:Bonnie Blairs, 1:2 -> 7:14
    • Hamstring Stretch

    Mary
    • LBC x 31, Left Crunch x 20, Right Crunc x 20, Dying Cockroach x 20, American Hammer x 10

    NMM
    I was a shy, introverted, simple, barefooted Arkansan a week ago. But after all of the media coverage, podcast shout outs, Instagram likes and Twitter retweets I have become quite accustomed to being the Center of Attention. I had everyone circle up (on me Belloq, in case you are wondering) for the warm-up and it felt so good that I stayed there the rest of the workout. It just felt natural to give the people what they want. I’m currently scheduled to be on the Roundtable Podcast this month. I’m fairly certain that this will spin-off into a weekly F3 podcast where I can wax poetic about the joy of running in flip flops, give my different product reviews for flip flops – feelgoodz vs. Locals, vs. that Reef flip flop with the built in bottle cap opener – The best place to take a leak in Pontiff Playground at 11:30 pm, etc….I have content for years.

    I’m also working with Scantron to create some NFTs to commemorate my flip flop 10Ks. Look for those to be dropping any day. You will be able to get a seat at the virtual auction table by writing a $100 check to my friend Cash. Small price to pay for a chance to buy image of me running in a pair of flip flops across your computer screen all day.

    There were some other things going on with the other guys at El Diablo, but honestly, I can’t remember what they were.

  • Triple Shift Birthday Q – 54 & 100 – from Triple Shift

    I’ve circled the Sun for 53 years and now I am entering my 54th year. With the passage of time, I can’t help but contemplate my life and how blessed I am to have a wonderful wife of 25 years and five (5) fantastic children! How did I get here? Well, I could answer that in so many ways but for today, I want to honor and recognize my dad who would have been 100 this year if he were still alive. With that in mind, I gave the disclaimer and did a very untraditional run for The Uptowner.

    WARMUP
    I gave the instruction to the PAX that we are running the one (1) mile Pontiff loop and that when we would encounter another person, we would greet them with a hearty “Merry Christmas.” If that person responded back with a “Merry Christmas” we would then perform five (5) burpees and four (4) big boy sit ups. If, however, they responded with anything else, we would perform ten (10) burpees and eight (8) big boy sit ups. Groans and protests ensued from Rev Sox….which validated my decision. During our run, we only encountered one guy walking a dog and he had his ear buds on and never responded at all when we all said, “Merry Christmas.”

    THE THANG
    When we arrived back where we started, we headed out to the football field, and I had the pax line up on the goal line for a tribute to my dad (who would have been 100) and to my birthday (54). For the exercise, we would bear crawl 100 yards and for every five (5) hand touches, we would get up and then perform four (4) forward lunges and then repeat until we reached the other goal line. After we reached the far goal line, I modified the exercise heading back. We would bear crawl 100 yards again but for every five (5) touches with the right hand, we would then perform four (4) burpees. Repeat that sequence until we reached the original goal line. That was a real crowd pleaser!

    With time running out, we partnered up and did B.L.I.M.P.S. around the track. Pax 1 and Pax 2 would run in a opposite direction around the track and when they met up, they would perform 5 burpees. After they performed their exercise, they would take off in the opposite direction and then perform the next exercise of 10 lunges (2 is 1) and so on until we finished with the thirty (30) squats.

    COUNTOFF, NAMERAMA, AND COT
    So very thankful for E Major (my 2.2) and the seven (7) other PAX members coming out to celebrate my birthday! Getting older is a natural condition but getting better takes intentionality, endurance, consistency and accountability. With that, may you experience a peace filled Christmas season and a blessed New Year as we continue to accelerate together throughout 2022!

  • Rocks or Blocks – from Kuch

    YHC made the trek to Metry to Q Rock City for another LVCC member who could not make it. The reception was positive – everyone agreed YHC was a clear upgrade. Well, I think that was implied with comments like “oh, you’re the Q” and “so you’re actually going to lead a workout today?” You had to be there

    We moseyed to the warm-up area for some warm-up exercises and some 8-count bodybuilders, which I guess are now a warm-up exercise for F3 Nola anyway. I think Triple Shift was a little late (workouts start promptly at 5:30 AM sir), but it might have just been that he needed some heavy machinery to move his rock.

    Next, we hit the field for some sprints and exercises. Bring the rock once, leave it for the next one. We did some curls, rows, thrusters (with rocks) as well as some burpees, merks, etc… without a rock.

    Next, we hit the hill for 11’s with heavy freddies (rock side) and burpees on the non-rock side. Everyone went hard and we just about finished before heading back to the rock pile. While we waited for everyone to arrive, we did some merry, including a set of 50 flutter kicks IC for a little added fun. Gotta bring the lagniappe.

    Back to the flag at 6:15 for COT. I was sore the following day, which reminds me that I need to hit other AO’s more often to get more variety. Rocks are different from blocks, and I suspect they force you to employ more stabilizer muscles because they’re unwieldy. So thanks to my Metry friends for reminding me of that.

  • Traversing the Birth Canal – from Fast Tax

    Traversing the Birth Canal

    It was a crisp, cold morning at Rock City as eleven PAX joined YHC for his 50th birthday Q.
    After disclaimer, we headed near the rock pile for warmups.

    Warmups consisted of:
    o Abe Vigodas X 10 IC
    o Nancy Kerrigans X 10 IC
    o Hairy Rockettes X 10 IC
    o Grass Grabbers IC 10
    o SSH IC 10

    Sufficiently warmed, we headed to the rock pile, grabbed medium rocks (most of us) and headed to the playground in search of YHC’s lost youth.

    The first event, which I am very uncreatively calling “Rock the Court”, pushed the bounds of comprehension/attention for many of the PAX in attendance (resulting in 10 punitive burpees before we even began) and went like this:
    Divide into 4 teams with each team occupying on corner of the tennis courts enclosure and four rocks (one for each team) placed in the center. One PAX member from each team runs to the center and performs 10 reps of the first of five selected exercises (O/H Press, Curls, Tricep Lifts, Rows, and Burpees) while the rest of the PAX are in a low plank. When he returns to his corner and low-planks, the next teammate runs to the center and does 10 of the same exercise. This repeats until all PAX on the team has had a turn, then the cycle repeats for the next exercise, and so on, until all five are complete.

    Leaving the tennis courts behind, we circled up for a round of Rocks Up (IC 15) and then it was off to the playground for YHC to deny his 50 years by proving he was still a child, or at least could act like one.

    The Playground Scramble went something like this:
    PAX start in plank while first PAX soldier crawls up the spiraled tubular slide (aptly but alarmingly described by Bolt as climbing out of the birth canal), down the ramp, through the small tunnel, then arm over arm across the monkey bars, across the balance beam, arm over arm across the next two overhead bar things then side scramble across the rock wall, all while not touching the ground (because it’s hot lava of course). Anyone touching the ground had to do 20 burpees.
    Next PAX can start up the slide after the PAX ahead of him exits the slide at the top. PAX waiting at the beginning or the end had to do continuous BBS until Q called plank or some other exercise.

    As we prepared to bring the rocks back, for a little extra entertainment, YHC thought “what kid doesn’t like a game of Indian Run?” With rocks of course. After 1 ½ cycles, YHC lost interest…time to drop off rocks and mosey to the flag.

    With a few minutes to spare, and YHC still trying to cling to his youth, we circled around the tree for Duck-Duck-Burpee, which Willie apparently forgot how to play…

    At 6:15 we headed to COT for name-o-rama, announcements, intentions, and prayer, followed by Coffeteria at PJs with a special treat (homemade coffee cake) by Mrs. Fast Tax, now affectionately called “Audit.”

    Gratitude to Bogey, Bolt, Frac Sac, Hand Grenada, Jingle Vader, King Kong, Mahatma, Scantron, Tax Credit (my 2.0), Vagabond, and Willie for being part of my birthday Q and making it so enjoyable.

    Thanks for the fellowship!
    SYITG

  • Battle Frisburpee 2.0 – from Fast Tax

    Battle Frisburpee 2.0
    It was a pleasantly coolish morning at the Uptowner as seven PAX arrived to close out the week. After a quick disclaimer, and ignoring PAX questions regarding any Battle Frisburpee rules changes, we moseyed to the field for warm ups:
    o Grass Grabbers
    o Bat Wings w/ MNC
    o Skydiving Snow Angels

    Unwilling to jump right into the highly anticipated main event, YHC kicked things off with 50 yds of Welsh Dragons:
    While remaining in plank position, PAX bear crawls forward 5 yds, do 1 merkin, 1 plank jack, and tap the BACK of each shoulder 1 time (YHC did forget this part). Repeat adding 1 rep to each exercise each 5 yds – bear crawl forward 5 yds, do 2 merkins, 2 plank jacks, 2 sets of back of shoulder taps… etc. We continued until we got to 10 reps each (50 yds), holding plank for rest of PAX to finish, then mosey back to the middle of the field.

    Thinking that PAX needed some warmup to their Frisbee throwing skills before the main event, YHC selected GO FETCH as the next thang:
    One pax throws a frisbee. All PAX sprint in that direction until frisbee lands. When it lands, all PAX stop and then lunge-walk until they get to the frisbee. First PAXD there gets to throw the Frisbee, rinse and repeat except change out lunge-walk with bear crawl, crab-walk and walk-crab, which YHC apparently got backwards…

    With 25 minutes to go, it was time for BATTLE FRISBURPEE.
    Even though YHC posted the rules on at least three different sites/channels/threads, a reminder of the rules (and a few added clarifications), was still requested by PAX in attendance.

    The revised complete rules are produced at the end of this Backblast.

    With that out of the way YHC will finish the tale…
    Team 1 (shirts): Bogie, Boo-Boo, MacGyver, and Fast Tax
    Team 2 (skins): Scantron, War Eagle, Bolt, and Fast Tax
    Since we had an odd number, YHC switched teams halfway through.

    The battle was close and hard fought with a score of 0-0 at the half. With the transition of Fast Tax to Team 2, the game took a decidedly more one-sided and aggressive (War Eagle) turn. Boo-Boo perfected the slow burpee on top of the Frisbee, while War Eagle demonstrated what full contact Battle Frisburpee could look like. YHC accidentally exhibited where not to throw the ball at an opposing player after which Bogey revealed the depths of his tenor – sorry Bogie. Team 2 pulled ahead and closed out the game 2-0.

    With game over we headed to COT for name-o-rama, announcements, intentions, and prayer.
    Followed by Coffeteria at PJs.
    Thanks for the fellowship! SYITG

    Battle Frisburpee – The Concept:
    A blend of ultimate Frisbee, soccer, and dodgeball, with an emphasis on individual burpee punishment, played running the width of a football field (sideline to sideline) as the length and the 5 and 20 yard lines as the left and right boundaries. Each side’s goal begins at the sideline and has a depth of 5 yards in from the corresponding end. This equates to a field 160 yds from end to end, excluding a 5 yd end zone on each side, and a width of 15 yards (or more if more than 10 players). The Goalie Box extends from the back of the end zone to the sideline plus 5 yards in, or 10 yards deep in total.

    Battle Frisburpee – The Rules:
    To score, a PAX must catch the Frisbee in the opposing team’s end zone (duh).
    When a team scores, the entire opposing team must do 3 burpees.
    If the Frisbee is dropped, i.e. thrown but not caught, the last person it touches (usually the one throwing it or the one who muffed the catch) must immediately drop and do 3 burpees. The Frisbee is still “live” and is treated as a fumble, any nearby PAX from either team can pick it up and resume play.

    If the Frisbee goes out of bounds, the last person it touches (usually the one throwing it or whoever it hits on the way out) must immediately drop and do 3 burpees. The Frisbee is “dead” and is treated like a soccer ball that went out of bounds, i.e. the opposing team now stands at the spot it went out and immediately resumes play (without waiting for burpees to be completed).

    If either of the player’s feet or any part of the Frisbee itself crosses the boundary, it is deemed out of bounds (clarification provided for Frac’s sake).

    Each team must appoint a “Baller” to act as a goalie of sorts. The Baller must stay in the Goalie Box if they are holding the ball and can throw the dodgeball at any approaching opposing team member, whether that person is holding a Frisbee or not. A player hit with the ball, must immediately drop the Frisbee, if carrying one, and do 3 burpees. The Frisbee is still “live” and can be picked up immediately by anyone else.

    The player is only “hit” if the ball doesn’t touch the ground first.

    The Baller is the only one who can throw the ball at an opposing player and the Baller must throw only from the Goalie Box.

    The Baller can leave the Goalie Box to retrieve the ball or teammates can retrieve for him. The opposing team cannot interfere with the retrieval of the ball.
    At any time, the Baller can elect to act as a player and run down the field but he must leave the ball in the Goalie Box, thus leaving the Goalie Box unguarded.

    If the Baller accidentally throws the ball at an opposing player’s family jewels, the hit player gets a free pass on burpees. (For Bogie)

    A player carrying the Frisbee can throw the Frisbee at an opposing player (that is guarding too closely) resulting in that player having to immediately drop and do 3 burpees.

  • Bringing the Wood (-en toothpick) – from Rudy

    El Diablo Bringing the Wood. Thanks to Thumb War for inspiring Hawg to start a new tradition! The El Diablo bat was to make its first appearance this fine morning. From here on out – 30 El Diablo workouts, including 5 Qs, will get your name etched on this fine bat.

    The PAX were all anxious to see The Wood. The anticipation. The anxiety. The desire to be like Reggie Bush, bringing That Wood to El Diablo. YHC had the Q, so Hawg who was allegedly travelling delivered the wood the night before.

    YHC took one look at the Wood, and suspected there would be problems. And as the PAX gathered in the gloom, YHC was right. “Where’s the Bat?” asked Scantron. “Wait, is that it?” sez Bogey. “That looks like a Toothpick” mocked Bolt. And on and on it went. YHC had to deflect criticism, happily throwing Hawg under the bus – “Hey, don’t hate the messenger.”

    But anyway, this is our Wood (or Wood-let, or Wooden Toothpick). Whatever, lets get started.

    Quick Warmup, then all the PAX grab one of the presents that YHC had delivered to the football field. A Log, a Bag o’ Rocks, A workout rope, dumbbells (not the War Eagle kind), medicine ball, etc.. All in, some 10 toys were available. But alas – there were 16 of us (counting the late arriving Triple Shift). So make do with some other exercises (burpees – what else would FracSac pick, 8 counts, etc…). One good addition – balancing on a basketball for derkins. Challenge both the upper body and core to stay on that ball.

    The Thang: one PAX (“it”) runs a lap with the bat above their head. (shortly modified to half a lap in the interest of time). Everyone else is doing their exercise with their thing. Then we rotate. Everyone got a chance with all of the toys, and everyone got to run once with the glorious bat. FastTax had an interesting take on “Thruster” that looked strangely like a “Squat”.

    Still had time for a Brian Kelly inspired game of “Turncoats and Traitors”. Groups of 3 – one PAX sprint backwards across the football field. The other two start with 2 burpees (later 1 burpee, later 1 8 ct) then sprint to catch the traitor. If they caught him, the traitor did burpees. Otherwise, the chasers did burpees. Or maybe everyone did burpees. Depends on how YHC felt at the moment. So everyone got to be a traitor and get chased down. Good times. Enjoy your coach, LSU.

    COT – 16 PAX welcomed the bat. Great seeing everyone in the glom, and welcome to Downhiller from Birmingham. Thanks for letting me try some new things – look forward to June 22nd, 2022 (the 30th El Diablo workout from now) to see who may be first to get their name on the bat.