F3 New Orleans

Tag: The Uptowner

  • Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes

    Conditions:

    Clear, 73 degrees, Feels like 74, Humidity 86%, Wind 3mph from SW

    Warm-up:

    IW x 31; Grass Grabbers x 15; Low Slow Squats x 20; Merkins x 30; Peter Parkers x 25; Bat Wings (Everything x 22 except MNNs x 31)

    The Thang:

    Wall Work:  Ascending Testicles; Balls to the Wall; Plank Walk x 15; Shoulder Taps x 15; Hip Slappers x 15

    Proceed to Rock Pile for 10! (Squats, Curls, Shoulder Presses)

    Repeat Wall Work

    Proceed to the Football Field for 100 yard Bear Crawls x 4

    NMM:

    • I was not planning on doing Bat Wings during the warm-up.  Don’t want to be too predictable.  But, I couldn’t help it.
    • I was not planning on doing so many bear crawls.  Don’t want to be too predictable.  But I couldn’t help it.
    • We welcomed FNG Cake Boss.  T-Claps to Rudy for the EH.  Unfortunately Cake Boss was only visiting the area.  He headed back to Jersey after the workout.  He just graduated from American University where he ran track and Cross-Country.  His PR for the 5K is in the 15 minute range.  Rudy is working on making sure he needs to be in New Orleans for work the third Wednesday of every July.

  • Honoring the Nine Fallen

    Ten men came to Pontiff to honor nine fallen service members who perished in a training accident on July 27, 2020.

    Warmup

    After the standard F3 disclaimer, a mosey to the rock pile for a warmup all in cadence x27: SSH, IW, MC, GG, and PJ

    Thang

    After the warmup, the PAX selected a rock and moseyed to the 50-yard line of the football field for the following nine exercises x27, all in cadence, with a sprint to opposing goal lines between exercises:

    Round 1- Overhead presses 1:1

    Round 2-Jump Squats- 1:1

    Round 3- Curls 1:1

    Round 4- Dying Cockroaches 2:1

    Round 5- Squat Presses 1:1

    Round 6- Diamond Merkins 1:1

    Round 7- Chest Presses 2:1

    Round 8- Prisoner Lunges 2:1

    Round 9- Rows 2:1

    After completing the above, PAX circled for what YHC calls a RING OF NAPALM:

    PAX held Al Gore while the lead PAX began 2 is 1 Bonnie Blairs, which eventually became 4-count Bonnie Blairs.  At the fifth exercise, the next PAX in the circuit began his ten exercises.

    PAX held leg lifts, while the lead PAX began 4-count observations.  At the fifth exercise, the next PAX in the circuit began his ten exercises.

    PAX held the plank of their choice while the lead PAX began 2 is 1 T-pushups.  At the fifth exercise, the next PAX in the circuit began his ten exercises. 

    Upon completion, PAX moseyed back to the rock pile to return the rocks, then back to the flag. 

    COT: Announcements, intentions, prayer, and named the FNG (Short-n-Sweet). Mahatma led the group in the pledge of allegiance.  Thanks to Vagabond for a grand flag!

  • Buying the Bundle

    Conditions:  Humid

    Warm-UP

    IW x 31; Bat Wings and Moroccan Robin (Forward Arm Circles x 20; Backards Arm Circles x 20, Seal Claps x 25, Overhead Claps x 25, Moroccan Night Clubs x 31) #Crowd Pleaser; Low Slow Squats x 15; Don Quixote x 10; Peter Parker x 15; Merkins x 15; Parker Peter x 15; Justifier Reflection x 15; Flutters x 15

    The Thang

    Bear Crawl to the Rock Pile (approximately 250 yards)

    Carry a Big Rock and a one handed rock to the Gym (approximately 100 yards)

    Wall Work:  Ball to the Wall; Ascending Testicles, Down and Dirty x 15; Chicken Peckers x 15; Hip Slappers x 15

    Carry Rocks back to the Rock Pile (Approximately 100 yards)

    Lunge walk x 40 yards

    Bear Crawl 60 yards

    NMM

    • My advertisement of a Low Impact Workout was more successful than anticipated.  I was pleasantly surprised to see 8 High Impact Men at my Low Impact workout.  I am sure The Boge, MmmmmBop, Vagabond, and even Hand Grenada were up for something Low Impact after the horrible things Hand Grenada made us do on Monday (Basically Sprint a mile with a 35 pound rock on your shoulder).  The meaner, leaner Gabby has been struggling with an injury to his svelty body and also seems to be in some kind of exclusive coffee tasting club with War Eagle and The Boge, which explains why they all wanted to be here.  Tool and JV came from afar because they love intrigue. 
    • After the initial Bear Crawl, Hand Grenada suggested that I with my promise of a low impact workout I was selling him a Bundle of goods that sounded good, but that he in fact did not want or need.
    • I have so missed JV’s labor pains.  They were in fine form during the initial bear crawl
    • There is a lot of perseveration on genitalia in the names of the wall exercises.  I did not name them   I got them off the F3 Nation website.  I can only imagine they were named by a 6th grader in an old man’s body. 
    • I’m a fan of these wall exercises.  Props to Ethanol
    • The new non-shovel Shovel Flag that Vagabond is flying should be the new standard in F3 Nola Shovel Flags. 

  • Pre-4th Pontiff-icating

    Four pax showed for the uptowner asking each other who was Q. At the 5:30 mark Vagabond claimed it and then group moseyed to rock pile and standard warmup with SSH, grass grabbers, windmills, peter parker, arm curls, mountain climbers, etc. Then on to the field of gloom where the pax circled (squared) up for ladder drill starting at 20 reps, declining in increments of 2, to 12 reps, comprised of a variety of maneuvers including burpees, elf on shelf, quarry, bench presses, lunges, ‘merican hammers, curls, box cutters, etc., with mosey’s in between each set. Closed out with 35x ‘dude you’re killing me’ LBCs enthusiastically cadenced by Bogey, plus 90 second plank. Mosey back for count off, ID, COT and prayer.

    TGIF

    Thank you Lord for our nation’s way-ahead-of-their-time and extraordinarily courageous founding fathers. And to all the patriots who gave their lives, loved ones, and/or livelihoods so we could have so much over two centuries later.

  • Crazy 8s

    Conditions

    Mostly cloudy, 65 F, Feels like 66 F, Humidity 93%, Wind 8 MPH from ESE.

    Warm-up

    Imperial Walkers x 31; Shoulder Taps x 31; Arm Circles: Forward x 16, Backerds x 15; Windmills x 10

    The Thang

    Grab your favorite rock and circle up for the duration.  Crazy 8s with a Deck of Death.

    • Hearts – Ground ‘n Pound con roca.  Reps = card value (2-14)
    • Spades – Squat Thrust con roca.  Reps = card value (2-14)
    • Diamonds – Curl to Press con roca.  Reps = card value (2-14)
    • Clubs – Core Exercise on the card sin roca. Reps = card value + 10 for numbers; 25 for face cards, 50 for the ace
    • Jokers – Repeat the last exercise
    • 8s – Do 8 eight count body builders each time an 8 is drawn

    NMM

    • Apparently I walked in hot and late.  Thought I had perfect timing to coolly stroll in at 0530 and give the disclaimer flag in hand, but the mumblechatter revealed that it was 0531.
    • War Eagle continues to be a non-conformist with his rock selection.  In spite of all of his peers selecting the traditional Pontiff drainage rocks, he continues to use a man-made cinder block.  Will War Eagle’s non-conformity lead to amazing success like Bill Bradley’s granny shot free throws, or will he always be viewed as a nut job like the guy that works out barefoot with F3 Nola?  Only time will tell. 
    • Mahatma taught us all an important life principle today.  Mahatma had a misshapen rock that was not easy to handle for some of the exercises.  After a round where some of the Pax traded rocks, Mahatma ended up with Frac’s rock.  Those of you that have posted at Rock City or The Uptowner may be familiar with this beast of a rock.  It appears to be a nice oblong shape that would be easy to handle, but once you start with it, you learn that one side weighs about 35 pounds and the other side weighs 15.  Remember kids, whatever your struggles are in life, there’s always someone else out there that has it harder than you. 
    • I suggest we start naming rocks.  I imagine that the aforementioned rock did not take kindly to our talk about its one-sided girth.  I can hear it protesting “It’s not a toomah!” like Governor Arnold in Kindergarten cop.  Therefore this rock shall henceforth be known as Schwarzenegger. 
    • Strava had my total mileage today at 0.18 miles.  That’s a successful Uptowner in my book. 

  • Friday Workout after Thanksgiving – Back to Work PAX

    YHC spent a few minutes Thursday evening after a second Thanksgiving meal to lay out a workout for Friday after Thanksgiving.    The plan was to keep it simple, no nonsense and focus on burning a few calories from the food and drink consumed the day before. 

    The alarm clock went off at normal time, but what was not normal was YHC hit the snooze button.     Alas a few minutes later, YHC awoke in a panic realizing he would not be at Pontiff for the 5:30 start time.    YHC quickly sent a message on mumblechatter that he would be “coming in hot”. 

    YHC arrived at Pontiff, near the rock pile and Tool stepped in to lead the warm-up.  After warm-up, we each grabbed a rock and circled up near the rock pile for Thang 1.    Ten-minute total time doing the following exercises in the following sequence:  10 ct. Merkins, 20 ct. Curls, 30 ct. Al Gore, 40 ct. Monkey Humpers, and 50ct. LBC’s. 

    After a brief 20 ct of rest – Thang 2 was started.     Ten-minute total time doing the following exercises in the following sequence:  10 ct. Squats, 20 ct. Flutter kicks, 30 ct. Squat press, 40 ct. Shoulder taps, and 50 ct. Penguins.

    After another 20ct. to catch breath, it was on to Thang 3.     Each PAX picked up rock and did the following exercises together in succession – 10 ct. curls, 10 ct. squat, 10 ct. bench press, and 10 ct. rows.  We then did 8 ct. of each exercise, 6 ct. of each exercise, and finished with 4 count of each exercise.   

    HVAC obliged and led the PAX for about 8 minutes of stretching and Yoga to close out the workout.  

    COT, announcements, intentions, and gratefulness for the Thanksgiving holiday.    This workout was great example of teamwork and fellowship – T-claps to Tool for helping with the warm-up, and T-claps to HVAC for leading the Yoga exercises.

  • Honoring USN Chief Petty Officer Fontan

    With a significant drop in air temperature and increase in wind, six men appeared from the gloom to sacrifice a piece of themselves in honor of another local hero warrior.  Chief Petty Officer Jacques J. Fontan served in United States Navy from 1989-2005.  He was born in NOLA and a graduate of Brother Martin High School.  Amnesty knew CPO Fontan and shared some memories of his life.  CPO Fontan served in the Cold War, Persian Gulf, War on Terrorism, and Afghanistan (Operation Enduring Freedom). He was the platoon Chief Petty Officer of SEAL Team 10. 

    CPO Fontan was KIA on 28 June 2005 while leading a quick reaction force sent to reinforce a SEAL recon team engaged in a fierce firefight against a numerically superior anti-coalition militia. As their helicopter hovered for a quick-rope insertion, they were hit by a RPG.  CPO Fontan was awarded a Bronze Star for heroic combat achievement during Operation Red Wings (part of the popular book and movie Lone Survivor).

    The standard disclaimer was given and a short mosey to the traditional Uptowner warmup area. 

    Warmup x28: SSH, Imperial Walkers, Mountain Climbers, Arm Circles (forward and backward), Windmills, and Peter Parkers

    Thang

    The PAX formed a line for an Indian Run on the one-mile asphalt track.  At the first parking lot the PAX stopped for incline merkins x28.  At the second parking lot the PAX stopped for decline merkins x28, definitely a struggle.  At the first metal building the PAX stopped for uphill walking lunges using the ramp, another crowd pleaser! Once back at the rock pile, PAX completed dips x28 using the concrete wall at the pumps. 

    Next PAX grabbed a rock for several rounds of curls, lunge with a twist, and triceps extensions, all x28. Amnesty suggested more leg work.  YHC likes to believe he is a man of the people, so Bulgarian split-leg lunges were performed.  Rocks were returned and a round-robin of Mary finished off the beatdown. 

    COT: Name-o-rama, announcements, intentions, and a prayer.  Special intentions were given for CPO Fontan’s soul and comfort for his family. It’s always an honor to lead a group of leaders and even more special to honor someone who gave all of his tomorrows for our today.  May we never take a second of our lives for granted.

  • Honoring SFC Muralles

    With the Iron PAX Challenge underway, 16 men came out of the gloom to honor a local warrior hero who gave his life in defense of freedom. Army Specialist First Class Marcus “Marc” Muralles was born in the NOLA area.  He was a member of the 3rd Ranger BTN, KIA on 28 June 2005 while responding to a call for help by a four-man SEAL Team in eastern Afghanistan, which was later named Operation Red Wings  (the story behind the popular book and movie Lone Survivor).  SFC Muralles was scheduled to return home a few days after his death to celebrate his daughter’s 10th birthday.  He was posthumously awarded a Bronze Star, Purple Heart, Meritorious Service Medal, Air Medal with Valor, and Combat Action Badge. 

    SFC’s family said that SFC Muralles lived every aspect of his life by the Night Stalker’s Creed. 

    After the standard disclaimer, the PAX moseyed to the traditional Uptowner warmup area. 

    Warmup x28: SSH, Arm Circles, IW, Abe Vigodas, and Mountain Climbers

    Thang:

    The PAX grabbed a rock and moseyed to the track/football field for a lap around the quarter-mile track.  Then they broke up into small groups for the following x28, with a ¼ mile lap around the track after each exercise (for a total of 1.5 miles): Burpees, Curls, Squat Presses, WWII sit-ups, Full Extension Pull-ups, and Merkins. Everyone pushed hard and completed the beatdown.  Once complete, the PAX cheered on and encouraged our F3 brothers who were completing the IPC. 

    COT: Name-o-rama, announcements, intentions, and a prayer.  Special intentions were given for SFC Muralles’s soul and comfort for his family. We welcomed FNG Slow Tax (Fast Tax’s youngest son), FNG Jessup, and another FNG. It’s always an honor to lead a group of leaders and even more special to honor someone who sacrificed themselves so we can sleep soundly at night.  May the fallen never be forgotten, and may we never take a second of our lives for granted.