Conditions: 72 degrees, 98% Humidity, Wind 2 mph from the SSE.
Many times the Disclaimer is mumbled at the start of the workout, something like “I’m not a professional trainer, push yourself don’t hurt yourself, follow me.” But what makes for a good disclaimer? It’s really the Q’s first act of leadership in the workout. So it’s worth giving some thought to it and using it to set the tone. The bare minimum that you want to accomplish with the disclaimer is to attempt and disavow yourself from any liability if things go terribly wrong in the workout. Now, I am not a lawyer, and I am fairly certain that a no-good, unscrupulous, slick, Yankee lawyer like Kuch could easily side step our good intentions and find a way to use the law to his advantage, but at least you will have tried. So the basic starting point of the Disclaimer is to inform the Pax that:
• You are not a professional trainer
• They are all present on their own accord
• They are responsible for their own well being
• That the workout may involve times where caution must be exercised (strenuous physical activity, running in the dark, uneven ground, lifting heavy objects, etc.)
• That they should modify the exercises at any point if they believe their safety is in Jeopardy and that they can seek your advice for such modifications if needed (all the while remembering that you are not a professional trainer and that it was your original direction that lead them to this place of peril in the first place).
That’s the bare minimum, but a good Q will use the Disclaimer for much more. Our number one goal as Q is to make sure everyone makes it through the workout safely. In addition to the minimum disclaimer, give any specific safety advice needed at this point. For example, if it is a running workout, talk about busy intersections, making sure you are running against traffic, and not leaving anyone to run alone. Make sure someone in the group has a phone. Assign someone to watch out for the six if needed.
If you want to go above and beyond, this is a good time to reinforce the mission and core principles of F3, especially if new guys are present. If you have planned an interactive workout, you can also take this time to forewarn the pax of questions you may ask during the workout, e.g., what is the mission of F3, what are the five core principles, why did you post this morning, etc…
Not all disclaimers will be the same, but you know when you hear a good one. When they are really good, they become a topic of conversation. After I gave the disclaimer this morning, we ran to the rock pile. I could hear Rev Sox and Boo Boo discussing the merits of the disclaimer I had just given. They wondered aloud if the new leadership would meet this level of excellence. Personally, I believe they can, but please, don’t get too disappointed if it takes a while.
Near the rock pile, we circled up for the warm-up. I led the group in 31 SSHs in honor of our playground’s namesake, followed by 15 Imperial Walkers. After that, we did a series of plank like exercises in succession (15 Peter Parkers, 15 Mountain Climbers, and 15 Parker Peters). Back on our feet, we closed it out with 15 grass grabbers and 10 Windmills.
The Thang
I spent months preparing for this Q. I read (and re-read) the book Primal Endurance by Mark Sisson. There is a great chapter in the book focused on Maximum Sustained Power. By taking some basic MSP concepts and adapting them to Rock City, I developed today’s workout. The basic principles were to find a heavy rock (mine was marked 52) and do the prescribed exercises at maximum speed. We would hopefully come close to our maximum power output in each set. We used a stack to form the basis of the workout and gave ourselves about 20 seconds to recover between sets. We gave our selves a two-minute recovery time between stacks starting with the 4th stack.
This was the workout with approximate reps included. Some may have done more or less:
• 5 Manmakers
• 5 Manmakers, 10 Shoulder Presses
• 5 Manmakers, 10 Shoulder Presses, 15 Squats
• Recovery – Plank, Tree Pose each leg
• 5 Manmakers, 10 Shoulder Presses, 15 Squats, 20 Curls
• Recovery – Southern Gentleman, Yankee Aggressor, Karate Kid each leg
• 5 Manmakers, 10 Shoulder Presses, 15 Squats, 20 Curls, 25 Rows
• Recovery – Reverse Plank, Warrior III each leg
• 5 Manmakers, 10 Shoulder Presses, 15 Squats, 20 Curls, 25 Rows, 30 Bench Presses
• Recovery – 10 Nolan Ryans each side
After this, we did some balance work. I listened to an hour-long podcast in preparation for this Q that discussed the value of unbalanced work and core stability. In an effort to build those intrinsic muscles responsible for so much of our balance and stability we performed the following:
• Curls x 5 with one foot off the ground…flapjack
• Shoulder presses x 5 with one foot off the ground…flapjack
• Rows in Warrior III x 5….flapjack
We finished with some Core work – 20 LBCs, 15 flutters, 10 side crunches each side.
Then we headed back to the flag.
NMM
About 25 minutes into the workout, Bolt prostrated himself. Was he injured? Should I check on him? Possibly, but unlikely. It seemed more likely that he was new to the Islamic faith and it was time for his morning prayer. How did I know he was new to the faith? He was totally facing the wrong way, unless he was trying to face Mecca, TX. I politely paused the workout and offered that East was the other direction. Leadership exemplified
At one point, a train stopped on the tracks. One of the young women, running in the park needed to get back across the tracks. As soon as Rudy saw this, he dropped his rock and ran toward her and the train to offer his assistance. He is a gentleman and a scholar…well, at least a gentleman. The young woman seemed to recognize him as he sprinted toward her yelling “Perv! Perv!” Did she confuse Paul with Perv? We will never know. Just as he arrived the train started back up, she yelled “God help me!” (which Bolt had already been praying for), threw herself under the train and disappeared.
On the way back to the flag, I EH’d a dog walker. I told him we meet in the park everyday at 5:30. He said, “I know (pause…sigh) you all park in my yard.” I feel good that he will join us in the gloom.
After the workout, I had to pay up on a bet to Hand Grenada for the Ole Miss – Arkansas game. One burpee for every point scored in the game. Arkansas lost the game 51-52. Hand Grenada made me yell “Hoddy Toddy” as I completed each burpee, otherwise he wouldn’t count them. I got to 53 burpees before I had to take a break. At that time, Hand Grenada yelled “No breaks! Start over!” I was too gassed to protest. Looking a lot like Paul Neman’s character in Cool Hand Luke, I wearily began the burpees over. Fortunately, for Cool Hand Hawg, Rudy and Mahatma jumped in to tell Hand Grenada that he was being unreasonable. They pleaded to him to show me mercy and that his demands were jeopardizing my safety. Hand Grenada explained that my mistake was made when I made the bet. If I was not willing to pay up, regardless of the physical harm I may undergo, I should have never made the bet. Rudy and Mahatma continued to grovel for my mercy until Hand Grenada exclaimed, “Weak…I have to go to work. Parten – I’ll see you at El Diablo.”
