F3 New Orleans

Category: Backblasts

  • Everybody’s an Expert – from America’s Best

    Ten genetically-modified hyper-intelligent HIMs posted this cold morning to exercise minds and bodies.

    And the categories are:
    The 4 P’s of Marketing
    Programming Languages
    Irish Musicians
    The Four Pillars of Catholicism/Christian Life
    Antibiotic Classes
    Versions of Halo
    Things on my Desk
    Minor Bluey Characters
    Harry Potter

    One thing I love about this PAX is that each member brings specific acumen to the table. Everyone is an expert in something. But first, YHC had to ascertain exactly what that was for each dude.

    Jackknife immediately impressed, not only showing up as a 2.0 on a Tuesday Tuff, but also by conveying one of his areas of expertise during YHC’s intro/example. Seriously. This kid is awesome. And he knows some Bluey.

    As for the rest, we went on an Indian run of discovery. As each man at the back sprinted to the lead, he declared his area of expertise for all to hear.

    Upon our return to the flag, we began this thang:

    Circle up, and each expert first chooses an exercise, then we all get to embarrass ourselves with our lack of knowledge in his area of expertise.

    YJ was first, and tried to suggest simply “merkins.” Of course, YHC predicted this, and so the box of destiny (formerly the box of Ballard Designs) was consulted.

    The options were: Absolutions, 4x4s, Manmakers, Thrusters, Goosies, No-cheat merkins, Burpees, WW3 sit-ups, or M.H.G.S. Amazingly it was the same number as number of categories/PAX (minus the moderator). Thus is the magic of the Box of Destiny.

    We went around the circle attempting to name the 4 P’s of Marketing, and for each answer that remained after each guess, we did that many of the named exercise. Of course, only YJ could answer most of these (although the judges gave credit to Dox, for “placement”); so we did a fair amount.

    Maneater was next, and I’m sure shook his head as we struggled to identify programming languages, although YHC was impressed with the knowledge of many in this area (Cardinal schooling YHC with HTML –mind blown).

    Irish Musicians was a surprise addition, and YHC’s favorite category. YJ used this opportunity to showcase his deep-rooted hatred of Oasis, refusing to identify either of the Gallagher brothers as musicians, instead opting for the pain of more beatdown.

    YHC’s poor phrasing of the next category left everyone except Cardinal confused as to what the question was actually asking for. This worked out, because only Cardinal could decipher YHC’s intent, and so we got to do more Absolutions. What didn’t work out as well was that Cardinal’s way of explaining was basically just murmuring all the answers! YHC will soon begin a journey that will hopefully help with improved trivia in this category.

    Other than Goose’s surprise guess of “penicillin” right out of the gate, only Dox was able to name 3 other antibiotic classes. Best wrong answer award of the day went to young Jackknife for his guess “Cocaine”. Dox enjoyed doing extra Thrusters with each wrong answer from the PAX.

    Although other guesses were counted as correct, only Pope truly knows which versions of Halo exist.

    And then we came to Lil’ Cuz. What do you do about a man like this? His acumen in so specialized YHC could not begin to pierce the veil of his true knowledge. He is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma… covered and smothered in perplexity. Even trying to guess what might be on his desk proved a challenge. Especially since most guesses would lead one to believe that Lil’ Cuz works in the 1950’s. Have you people only ever seen a desk in “Mad Men”? I’m pretty sure the next few guesses would have included “an ashtray” or “an empty whiskey glass.”

    We ran out of time, but allowed ourselves just a few more burpees while Jackknife rattled off at least 5 or 6 minor characters in Bluey. And Goldilox’s category will have to wait until Double-Jeopardy.

    Yankee Jeaux allocated the AlPAXa inVESTment to Goldilox

    COT and Cardinal prayed us out.

    America’s Got ToVent:

    The seed for this beatdown came from YHC’s exclusive double-secret trivia league, which YHC introduced today to those present. While YHC only gets 2 referrals into this league per season, I am happy to offer them to anyone in this PAX (even Dox). Although as I write this, I actually already have added my 2 referrals to the waiting list! So instead, let me just say I am glad to add another inner-circle for YJ to strive towards– Maybe next season, my friend.
    Thank you all for what you have done to challenge and change YHC in ways you might not even know.
    Well-done showing up and showing off your brains and brawn. You guys always impress me.

  • King Kong’s Sweaty Bell Countdown: A Roaring Send-off to 2023! – from King Kong

    As the clock ticked down to the final moments of 2023, a fearless group of fitness enthusiasts gathered at the Audubon Zoo for the ultimate New Year’s Eve workout at 6:30 a.m. sharp…… except a few…..– and what a workout it was! Led by none other than the mighty King Kong, we decided to bid adieu to the year with a 23-rep extravaganza that left us questioning our sanity and laughing our way into 2024.

    We started by warming up those limbs with arm circles, side-straddle hops, halos, around the world, grass grabbers, self love (one your own…. a little redundant), imperial walkers, and hill billies. If our limbs had voices, they would have probably begged for mercy right then and there. But the real fun was just getting started.

    With the zoo as our witness, we moseyed to the stop sign and back, like a herd of fitness-fueled animals on the loose. The Audubon animals probably wondered if they’d been replaced by a new, more energetic species.

    Then came the kettlebell chaos! Curls, squats, little baby crunches (because even crunches need to be cute sometimes), side-straddle hops, reverse curls, alternating lunges – the list seemed endless. Just when we thought we’d mastered the art of swinging a kettlebell, King Kong threw in some unexpected moves like bell taps and sitting overhead presses. Our kettlebells must have been whispering, “What did we ever do to deserve this?”

    The cast of characters, including Jingle Vader, Stork, Strings, Douille, Almonaster, Willie, Subprime, and T-Bone, added their own flair to the festivities. The zoo animals probably joined in the laughter as we attempted manmakers, with King Kong himself leading the charge.

    As the final echoes of kettlebell clangs subsided and the side-straddle hops reached their 23rd glorious rendition, we realized that if we could survive King Kong’s Sweaty Bell Countdown, we could conquer anything the new year threw at us. We ended with the usual COT. We reminded ourselves that we never take our mental and physical health for granted. Here’s to laughter, sweat, and the absurdity of it all – may 2024 be as epic as our last beatdown of 2023!

    Thanks ChanGPT for this backblast.

  • Murph Prep Monday – from Landing Strip

    Twas a light showing this new year’s morning, with 6 brave souls showing up to start the year off right. One of my new year’s resolutions is to complete the Murph Challenge this Memorial Day. That’s a 1 mile run, 100 Pull-Ups, 200 Merkins and 300 Squats and another 1 mile run. This morning’s workout was the first of several to prepare the PAX for that.

    Warmup
    In-place: 20 SSHs, Self Love OYO and 20 Grass Grabbers.

    Tha Thang
    We then proceeded with a circuit of 5 Pull-Ups, 10 Merkins and 15 Squats, followed by a mosey down to the shelter and back. I got 8 full circuits in, plus 2 more partials (hanging for 10 seconds in lieu of Pull-Ups).

    Mary
    A round-robin of Penguins, Crunch Frogs, J-Los and Scissor Kicks.

    Shoutouts
    -Couch, for bringing 2 FNGs to this morning’s workout
    -Acorn and Hawk Talk, said FNGs, who along with Couch, rung in the new year at Tipitina’s last night and then posted this AM
    -JV, for actually completing the Pull-Up / Merkin / Squat components of the Murph on the first day of the year
    -Willie, for showing up (albeit a few minutes late)

    If anyone is reading this, I’d propose we start future holiday, or holiday adjacent workouts (e.g. day after Thanksgiving) at least 30 minutes later than usual.

    Happy new year people!

  • Adios 2022 – from Jose10k

    To 10k or not to 10k

  • 12 Glorious Days – from Goose

    It was a chilly morning, and YHC was still filled with the Christmas spirit on this sixth day of Christmas. There may have only been one Goose-a-laying, but there were 16 PAX who gathered late in the gloom, including a brave FNG and his 2.0.

    After the disclaimer, warmups were quiet as they typically are without Dox, though Enron bared the InVESTment early, giving hope to the thicker PAX that the zipper might be zippable after all. There was no short-changing on reps or exercises as YHC needed some serious motion-lotion after this PAST week’s Dox/YJ leg destruction combo.

    All grabbed coupons and Duke grabbed YJ’s Goose-Grinch head-on-a-stick and we headed to The Chimney, which is always much farther than it should be. The head was planted in the permafrost with much effort and YHC revealed the theme: the 12 Days of Christmas/Fitmas, to be performed in traditional F3 style. YHC tried to focus on the great gift of getting to really dig into Christmas for an entire two weeks, but most of the PAX just heard “ascending ladder of ridiculousness”.

    The routine went like this: YHC would reveal the exercise of each ascending day and write it on the back of the Goose-Grinch head (couldn’t find the marker board or anything that would stand up in an open field). Each new day’s exercise would then be added to the previous in ascending ladder style. This meant we started with Day 1, then did Day 2 and Day 1, all the way until Day 12 through Day 1 (or almost). Here’s the list of exercises:
    1 Bear crawl to the chimney (about 20 yards, sung by all the PAX in unison with gusto, or maybe just Duke and Jack-knife)
    2 Diamond Merkins
    3 Jump Squats
    4 WW3 Situps
    5 8-count Manmakers
    6 Freddys Mercurying (4-count)
    7 Triceps extending
    8 coupons curling
    9 Bonnies Blairing
    10 Peter Parkers Merkining
    11 J-Lo’s hipping
    12’s (a set of 12’s with burpees at the head and genuflections at the chimney; run there, nur back)

    Even before the 12’s were introduced, one of the PAX, who shall remain nameless, suggested that the 9th day should be changed to “9 legs kicking Goose’s crotch”, and though Duke tried to comply, the Bonnies continued Blairing and order was restored.

    There was one incident wherein YJ, the ever-vigilant form policeman/expert, concerned for the health and joint strain potential of the clydesdales on the far side of the group, came over and joined them to watch to see if there speed was a result of poor form. Turns out, it wasn’t, and he finished that set faster than he had originally thought possible because he was keeping up with the guys around him. Another proof of the strange psycho-physical dymamics at work in the mind of man and further confirmation of the massive value of F3. YJ quickly took up his former position after that set.

    YHC’s singing of the entire list after announcing each new day’s “gift” gave the PAX a solid break between sets, and so it wasn’t until the 12th Day was revealed that mutiny again threatened to prevail. A rousing speech about squeezing every last drop of Christmas wonder out the season up to the very last minute of the 12th day was heard by the PAX as, “Here’s something really stupid since you’re already worn out and hoping it was almost over.” Anger and scheming were brewing as YHC explained that the 12th day would be a set of 12’s including burpees and genuflections. Thankfully, concern for the health of the fading FNG diverted their attention long enough for YHC to shout “On your own, begin!” And, they did. Incredibly, they did. And they didn’t stop until YHC had to call it for time.

    Encouraging words were given by many to the FNG as we gathered our coupons and layers of winter clothing for the long mosey back to the flag. The last minute was filled with a high plank before count-off, name-off and FNG naming ceremony. Dean Roy (10) was named jack-knife due to his cache of pocket knives and other weapons, and Daryl Roy (38) was named Maneater despite the many interesting facts and unique traits that he shared. His first name, Daryl, is shared with Daryl Hall of Hall and Oates, the duo who sing “Maneater”, and, most importantly, he winced at the suggestion, which solidified his new identity.

    Enron inVESTed YJ with The InVESTment for his foray into more challenging waters, even if for one set, and even if it was in an effort to try to blow the whistle on someone sacrificing form for speed. Motivation is motivation, I guess.

    Announcements: New Year’s Day is Monday, and a beatdown at The Stage is the perfect way to start 2024 (at the regular time!). It’s also a great day to start Exodus 90 with a solid number of this awesome PAX. For those still on the fence, the first meeting is Friday, 5:30am at St. Thomas if you want to check it out.

    Lil’ Cuz prayed us out, and the PAX basked for a while in the glory of shared suffering well earned. Grateful for such an awesome, hard-working, strong-hearted crew!

    SYITG,
    Goose

  • Dirty Santa on the 6th day of Christmas – from Russo

    Good weather, maybe a little “brisk” at upper 30s, since YHC will never call it cold. Pax of 11 for some outstanding fellowship and putting in work (or paying the rent as I believe the Millenials like JV call it).

    Warmup (10x – 20x IC)
    – SSHs
    – Self love
    – Imperial walkers
    – Arm circles
    – Toe touches
    – High knees
    – Hillbillies

    Thang
    A replay of Granny’s 12 days of Christmas – themed beatdown. We moseyed down to the lake and back, stopping each block to honor one of the days of Christmas, starting at 12, stopping at the trailhead for Dirty Santa, and making it back down to 1.

    As for the days (it helps if you sing it):
    On the twefth day of Christmas, F3 gave to me:
    – 12 knuckle merkins
    – 11 Peter Parker’s
    – 10 Legs a lunging
    – 9 Americans hammering
    – 8 count body builders (8)
    – 7 jumpers squatting
    – 6 monkeys jumping
    – 5 Don-key kiiiiiiiiicccks
    – 4 frogs a crunching
    – 3 T merkins
    – 2 stars a jumping
    – And a burpee for both you and for meeeeeee

    Dirty Santa – relatively simple
    (1) Each HIM picks a number.
    (2) Number 1 picks a random gift/exercise from the bag and performs said exercise while the other HIM perform the standard (e.g. 10 merkins)
    (3) Number 2 has a choice: Number 1’s chosen exercise, the standard, or a new “gift”. If he chooses either of the first two options, the one who had their “gift” stolen can steal or select another mystery “gift”.
    (4) Around and around we go, until all HIM have a chance to select.

    The “gifts” included one cherry picker, slaloming the columns, trip up and down the pilot house, 20 monkey humpers, donkey kicks, arm circles, etc. Two separate rounds that had Bird intensifying, SOGO hating me, JV doing too many freak nastys, YHC taking notes to never include absolution again, and Jose being the beneficiary of limited cherry pickers this year, a complete 180 from when he got stuck with multiple last year or the year before.

    Back at the lake, we did a quick 12 days, with freak nastys, box jumps, BSSs, step ups, urkins, durkins, wife pleasers, penguins, big boys, Freddie Mercury’s, hello Dollie’s, and one cherry picker.

    COT
    Count, NOR, announcements, and prayer closed us out, where we continued to lift up Freon and his family, as well as the Brady family.

    Wrapping up the year, getting started with a new year on Monday with either an Akbar Marsh beatdown and Waffle House trip, the Franco’s Dip and Dash, or maybe both!

    I look forward to more beatdowns in 2024 and a continuation of the fellowship that makes getting up before 6AM on a cold Saturday morning worth it.

    SYITG

  • Run, Run, and run more – from PVC

    Stretch arms
    Abe vigoda
    Calf scoop
    Grass grabber
    Peter Parker
    the old man bogey
    Wife pleaser
    Flutter kicks
    imperial
    Walker

    11’s Merkins run the steps BBS run down the ramp

    Variety of exercises on Pad with timer being a runner to the can with 3 squats

    COT

  • 11’s to stay warm – from PVC

    Stretch arms
    Abe vigoda
    Calf scoop
    Grass grabber
    Peter Parker
    the old man bogey
    Wife pleaser
    Flutter kicks
    imperial
    Walker

    Mosey
    Donkey kicks calf raises

    Mosey
    Dips step ups

    Mosey
    11’s Merkins bear crawl bbs lunge

    Mosey LBC

    COT

  • FNG and Down Range Visitor – from Waterpik

    It was a cold, yet fruitful morning at Russos’s quaint Splash Pad AO in Old Mamdeville. We welcomed an FNG and a visitor down range from Huntsville, Alabama.

    The Workout was not compatible with an adequate backblast and YHC doesn’t remember rep counts, etc. To sum up, we did a bunch of merkins, sister mary Catherine’s, Peter Parker’s,
    Mountain climbers, core exercises, and burpees. I don’t know how many sets and reps were completed other than to say I was tired when the closing bell rang.

    Welcome to FNG, Grupe and also to spice girl, down range from Huntsville, AL, in town visiting his fiancés family.

  • You can’t spell legendary without leg day. – from Jose10k

    3 men took the red pill on this chilly 34 degree morning. It was too cold for the top floor, so we moved it down to the second level. Einstein and I began our warm-up when Fletch came rolling up hot on two wheels. Apparently he has been battling broken pipes at his home.
    The Thang: Inspired by the Norwegian Speed Skating workout on Wednesday, YHC decided that it was a leg day. First up, Lieutenant Dan the length of the parking garage. Then Side lunges the length of the parking garage, left leg first, then right leg the length of the parking garage. Then another Lieutenant Dan the length of the parking garage. Then moseyed to the bottom of the parking garage for some calf raises, 2 for each step up to the top. Back to the second floor for some mix mary. Wife pleasers IC (30 count) followed by 30 count of pulses, penguins, more wife pleasers, right elbow to left knee, left elbow to right knee, more wife pleasers, lbcs, then more wife pleasers. Cooper Head Squats (20 count), followed by Lt Dan the length of the parking garage, then one more round of Lt. Dan’s. COT, Einstein prayed us out. Russo has the Q tomorrow, Akbar has a New Years Beatdown at the Marsh with a new start time of 7 am with Waffle House afterwards. Safe travels to all this weekend, prayers for Freon and his family, Fletch and his home repairs, and all other family needs. I appreciate those who posted and those who are reading this. No merlot was splashed today. Don’t let the cold weather keep you from coming out. It warms up pretty quick.