Tag: Bolt

  • What do u call a VQ minus the V? – from Bolt

    YHC put the call out Friday in mumblechatter and Sunday in announcements as hype-man that Madoff would pop his Q cherry; never did I expect 5:30 to strike and also have to be the Q! A VQ without a V is just another Bolt BD, mosey to the car for JBL to serenade the pax as required by the Geneva Convention. Warmorama of more stretchy stuff than normal plus the usual: Abe SLOWgodas, Abe Vigodas, Tie Fighters, Seal claps, OH claps, PP/PP. Finish with 25 Australian pull ups IC as the mosquitos attacked so off to JPAX for the Thang:

    26 RLSU
    25 incline merkins
    26 LLSU
    25 decline merkins
    Retrieve the coupons for EMOM (1 minute work, 10 secs rest quickly changed to 40 secs rest after two exercises):
    OH press
    Squats
    Big boys 
    Curls
    Lunges
    American Hammers
    Tricep press
    Calf raises
    Manmakers
    Finish with Mary:
    One legged wife pleasers (non-grounded leg extended) x 15, flapjack
    LBC x 30
    Penguins x 30
    Protractors 1 minute
    Return coupons and mosey to flag with time for 5 burpees OYO
    COT

  • Pain and Self-Loathing in New Orleans – from Bolt

    Checking the Q sheet at 9:00pm YHC expected to decide whether to post or not based on the name and seeing none, my fate was sealed—there would b no fartsack Friday for the Q is now I. Filed with self-loathing for myriad reasons, that would guide our plight in the gloom so off to bed I went. Pre-Q jitters must’ve had me tossing during the wee hours as thoughts of bear crawls, rocks, 11s and burpees swirled prior to the alarm.
    Warmorama varied slightly to account for YHC’s very tight everything (opening song of course did NOT vary—Frac was pleased): Abe SLOWgodas, IW, Tie Fighters, Seal claps, OH claps, PP/PP, SSH Head to playground for Morning Calls and mosey to rock pile for a rock that pax would carry to the hill.

    The Thang: 11s it is (despite Frac and Boo Boo NOT hearing the intro) with OHP on backside of hill followed by bear crawl up to top/mosey down to trackside for LSS/Crab Can Cans (dropping into crab walk position after LSS in order to kick each leg up like a Can can dancer—Fast Tax shoulda been here!) followed by mosey to top of hill for 5 8-count BB and down the hill to start the next round. Break Down had been doing 10 reps of OHP each round, having forgotten how 11s work; welcome back Kotter.

    Mahatma Mayhem and the usual studs took up Mary as the mere mortals tried to finish up before heading back to rock pile at 6:12. Back at flag past 6:15; apologies pax—will drop Morning Calls next time (or move to the end). There was only one song skip and very little mumble chatter during the Thang so it must’ve been sufficient . COT, gratitude for the pax.

  • The Ascension – from Charmin

    At length he appeared to the eleven as they were at table: and he upbraided them with their incredulity and hardness of heart, because they did not believe them who had seen him after he was risen again. And he said to them: Go ye into the whole world, and preach the gospel to every creature. He that believeth and is baptized, shall be saved: but he that believeth not shall be condemned. And these signs shall follow them that believe: In my name they shall cast out devils: they shall speak with new tongues. They shall take up serpents; and if they shall drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them: they shall lay their hands upon the sick, and they shall recover. And the Lord Jesus, after he had spoken to them, was taken up into heaven, and sitteth on the right hand of God. But they going forth preached every where: the Lord working withal, and confirming the word with signs that followed. Mark 16:14-20

    13 men came into the gloom to improve themselves.

  • 9: For/19 – from Bolt

    YHC pre-blasted a call for HC the night before as the plan was developing to gauge headcount and in true F3NOLA fashion there’s was minimal response so it was pleasantly surprising to see the mid-field circle grow to 10 pax as the warmorama began with our much beloved theme song (I know Frac secretly has it on “repeat” as he drives to work his 2, soon to be 3 days a week–COMPLIANCE!).
    Abe SLOWgodas, SSH, seal/OH claps, tie fighters, self love, mosey to playground to complete warm ups with Morning Calls. Mosey to the rock pile advising pax to select a medium rock they could do lots of reps with, where YHC laid out IN CLEAR DETAIL, that we would do 9 (on 4/19, where’s Rudy when I need him!?) consecutive exercises of 25 reps each OYO and as you finished either plank or SSH on the six.
    OH press
    Squats
    Big boys 
    Curls
    Lunges
    American Hammers
    Tricep press
    Calf raises
    Manmakers
    The mumblechatter was considerable and distracted the pax from executing properly because after going through the entire list of 9 YHC reiterated the first three as we began to kick us off and announced I’d call them out as we progressed. Some nameless pax (KB/Mr R) were planking after the first 75 reps which created confusion for other pax and elevated the mumblechatter—must get back on the rails. We continued through the next six exercises without much incident and considerably less mumblechatter, especially as the final task of 25 man-makers loomed large (grunts replaced words—success). Round two each pax was issued one of the same nine exercises and led the circle of pax in cadence then the next pax so all 9 are done without stopping: 1 rep each, which Bogey took issue with as not being worth it and also complained about the getting down/up which (was BY DESIGN); along the way we learned Mr. Rogers was never given the you tube link for counting cadence. Subsequent rounds were 2 then 5 then 10 reps per exercise before the next pax led in cadence with slight pauses between rounds to catch our breath.
    Next was 5 minute EMOM of what else—10 burpees! This is when Bogey decided to use the burpee rule thinking he was gaming the system yet he simply added more burpees to the count. We finished with protractors.

  • What’s That Smell? – from Space Cowboy

    Although I arrived 15 min early at The Goldmine on this warm humid morning, I was greeted by @Charmin who was evidently eager to start the beatdown. We were soon joined by @Frac Sac and @Bolt. Promptly at 5:30, I gave the disclaimer and we moseyed to the pad for warmups.
    Slow Squats x 10
    SSH x 20
    Slow Abe Vigodas x 10
    Imperial Walkers x 10
    Seal Claps x 15
    Forward Arm Circles x 10
    Backwards Arm Circles x 10

    As we wrapped up our warmups, @Boo Boo conveniently came running out of the woods (we were afraid to ask what he was doing) to form our group of 5 and we continued to mosey to the JPAX. We retrieved our coupons (cinder blocks) from under the stairs and proceeded to the front area of the JPAX.

    All exercises with Coupon
    Curls x 25
    Overhead Press x 25
    Rows x 25
    Flutter Kicks 2-1 x 25
    Squats x 25
    Back Lunges 1-1 x 25
    Mountain Climbers x 25
    Wife Pleasers x 25

    We put the coupons aside and proceeded to the starting point on the path that circles the JPAX.

    1 Burpee at every light pole (about 25 total) with a mix of run, lunges, back pedal, and karaoke between each pole.

    As we entered the path at the rear of the JPAX, @Charmin yelled, “what’s that smell?”, as we were simultaneously hit by a strong wave of fragrance during mid-burpee. Without missing a beat, @Frac Sac, our Kennarie Ridge horticulturist expert, identified it as Jasmine. Jasmine’s effect on us was immediate as I noticed @Frac Sac and @Bolt “bolting” to the front of the group, @Boo Boo doing 2 burpees instead of 1, and @Charmin performing the cleanest form burpees ever seen aka the Baryshnikov of Burpees. As we concluded the round, we headed back to the coupons.

    All Exercises with Coupons
    Curls x 25
    Overhead Press x 25
    Block Merkins x 25
    BBSU x 25
    Flutter Kicks 2-1 x 25
    Dips x 25

    Maybe Jasmine’s effect was greater than expected since the PAX asked for another round of “1 Burpee per light pole” on the JPAX path. I obliged and we did another round with Jasmine to the PAX’s satisfaction and ended the round with Burpee speedbumps which includes 10 light poles in immediate succession.

    With time expiring, we headed to the flag to conclude with our COT.

  • S&M is for KnOTers Too… – from Bolt

    As the magic hour struck Vagabond took off as the lone runner and the KnOTers joined the ‘Mat-ers for S&M. KnOT walk the track path to the pavilion where we focused on hammies and hippies (IT band). COT.

  • Pax Tax: We ALL Pay… – from Bolt

    Since 49.99% of the US counts on us to be the HIMs we r 365, YHC thought it prudent to avoid the fartsack by taking the Q on “reckoning day” ‘24.
    Warmorama of the usual: SSH, MMP, all the arm movements including Tie Fighters and MNC (Charmin AND War Eagle were both here and anytime a Catholic and a Baptist can both stay sober AND dance together…well…

    …what more is there to do/say!?).
    The Thang: inspired by Triple’s unexpected Renaissance Q, YHC decided pax tax was in order: mini Murph!!!!
    3 stations of 2 pax/2 pax/3pax: 5 pull ups, 10 merkins, 15 squats followed by a 1/5 out and back until 6 rounds were completed, except Space Cowboy did 7—BEAST! Recover, 10 seconds of encouragement to bring the energy back up and a 10 count before onto the 6…

    Coolorama—ISH: Sun salutation, wife pleasers, right leg wife pleaser with extended left leg/knees touching with arms stretched out overhead until the burn of tax day set in…flapjack followed by wife pleaser held in the up position and arms stretched out overhead for time with instruction to raise the hips another inch while further squeezing the glutes. Upright seated with legs spread wide and forward fold, arms outstretched breathing deeply with a deep breath cycle allowing the torso to extend another inch closer to the ground, stretching the lower back. On your feet for forward fold allowing the crown of the head to drop toward the Earth and final breath cycle inhales up vertebrae by vertebrae. Plank to Peter Parker followed by Parker Peter and two sets of 5 burpees bc HELLO—it is tax day!!! Honored to lead HIMs.…whose got next!?

  • Eclipse Glasses are Not Required! – from Space Cowboy

    It’s been 45 years since the last total solar eclipse crossed the United States and it will be another 20 years before it happens again. To mark the significance of this day, 9 brave PAX journeyed to Kennarie Ridge to sacrifice their blood sweat and tears on the grounds of the JPAX. After giving the disclaimer on-time, we headed to the launch pad for warm-ups:

    Warm-Up – IC
    Samson Stretch (each leg) – 10 second hold
    Slows Squats x 10
    Slow Abe Vigoda x 10
    Forward Arm Circles x15
    Backwards Arm Circles x15
    Seal Claps x15
    SSH x20
    Imperial Walkers x10
    Hillbillies x10

    Maybe it was the cool 68 degree weather or the excitement for the pending eclipse later in the day but there was a notable amount of chatter among the PAX during warm-ups as compared to a typical Monday morning. But, then, we moseyed to the JPAX. The chatter would soon be replaced by an eerie silence, an occasional complaint, and/or a few vocal and physical signs of pain and agony as they endured the “eclipse” beatdown.

    Thang 1 – “Eclipse” Beatdown with a buildup from partial to full exercises – OYO
    Starting at the JPAX flags
    Run to the JPAX “ramp of pain”
    Bear crawl up ramp
    Lunges down the ramp
    Run back to JPAX flags
    Burpees x10
    Repeat Ramp/Run
    Burpees x10
    Merkins x20
    Repeat Ramp/Run
    Burpees x10
    Merkins x20
    Box Jumps x30
    Repeat Ramp/Run
    Burpees x10
    Merkins x20
    Box Jumps x30
    SSH x40

    Thang 2 – Post Eclipse “Recovery” – OYO
    11s – Burpees/Merkins with a run around the narrow JPAX circular path each round

    Headed back to flag for COT with special intentions for Frac Sac and Boo Boo as well as safe travels for everyone participating in the eclipse events later in the day.

  • I Pity the (April) Fool – from Bolt

    YHC, in a not so cryptic way, let the pax know on the Q sheet the BD would be for fools since it WAS April Fool’s Day (a favorite of mine for nonsense, Tom Foolery, and shenanigans).

    Warmorama featuring a disclaimer that the standard warm up song would NOT b part of today—Frac was giddy…alas, it IS 4/1: Rapper’s Delight it is. A little more stretch type stuff since it’s cooler temps still: tie fighters, grass grabbers, MMP along with the usual SSH, OH/seal claps, PP and of course MNC: I mean, BOTH Frac and Charmin!? It would b a sin not to; plus the aforementioned nonsense et al. Mosey to JPAX for coupon retrieval with the normal playlist—this was soon to change for these Fools…

    The (Yen/Yang)Thang:
    YHC explained the Yen would be the regular exercise in cadence followed by the Yang which entails a more time under tension version (a la Triple Shift) in cadence.

    There was considerable debate/dissent when the Yang was described that those things were not opposites (except I’m the Q—dammit) once we got going there was enough groaning from the PAX which confirms they are indeed the Fools today. Time for the playlist switch: BWAAHAHAHA

    Squats X 15 (coupon)/Yang: hold bottom of squat for 3 count and push ground away, squeeze glutes at top for each rep x 10

    Merkins x 15/Yang: hold mission impossible for 3 count and extend arms with plank jack at top for each rep x 10

    Reverse lunges R x 15/Yang: hold left leg at 90 degrees/R leg full reverse lunge with tall torso for 3 count, stand up and touch L elbow-R knee x 10

    Derkins/ x 15 Yang: one derkin to Peter Parker x 8 (Frac HATED this and committed to doing it in the future)

    Reverse lunges L x15: hold right leg at 90 degrees/L leg full reverse lunge with tall torso for 3 count, stand up and touch R elbow-L knee x 10

    Irkins x 15/Yang: one irkin to Parker Peter x 5

    Tricep press x 15 (coupon)/Yang: hold tricep dip at the bottom for three count, up for rep

    OH press x 15 (coupon)/Hold top OH press, squeezing pecs tight for 3 count down the rep count x 10 (Charmin couldn’t tell if he was squeezing at the top—bro, do u have pecs???)

    Ring of Fire/Ice (10 count, holding plank for Fire and Qs count of Mary for Ice): Shoulder taps followed by LBCs x 30. Time to return coupons and head to flag. COT.

  • Gangster of Love – from Charmin

    Some people call YHC Maurice, but that has nothing to do with the beatdown. Typical Thursday morning beatdown of leaders leading and doing their own thing.