F3 New Orleans

Tag: Honeysuckle

  • “Hey, Goose, You Big Stud!” – from Yankee Joe

    Over the past few weeks, the PAX has been playing regular season games while its Coach is sidelined for negligence around a sign-stealing scandal.

    Wait…that doesn’t sound right. Rufus, where the hell did you get this information from? Seriously? You let that baked bean loving cousin of yours tell you what to write? How many times do I have to tell you…Duke, is not a part of our Blast productions. And while we’re on the topic, you can tell that mutt and his lackey to roll their amateur footage all the way back to St. Johns.

    I’m sorry. It’s not you. I’ve been under a lot of pressure. In the past month, my profession, my coffee, and my smirk have all been called into question. I’m not sure who I am anymore, and the scorn is flowing like Goldilox (where has that guy been, by the way?).

    Ok, so over the past few weeks, the PAX has been posting without its tactle…I mean fearless leader in attendance. It has been a season of growth for the PAX, both in numbers and in identity. With Ponzi and Tidy Whity back in the mix, along with White Meat coming in hawt and staying hawt, the energy of beatdowns is palpable, not to mention the chatter quality has really found a new level.

    But no matter how many FNG’s show up, or how creative the beatdowns get, or to what extent Pope smokes the rest of us in…well everything, nothing but nothing can replace Montana. I guess he wasn’t really ‘carrying the boats’ after all.

    RUFUS! DUDE, C’mon! Please try to treat this more seriously than Popeye doing bonnie blair’s.

    Alright…Nothing but nothing can replace the energy and poise brought by Goose. And yet, while his absence creates a gaping abyss for Paradox to talk about pre-order lady cut t- shirts (“Bruhh, so the sport-tek is def superior to the tri-blend, no question.”), we can easily forget about Goose’s path to recovery. His faith unrelenting, Goose reminds us that God has a plan. Of course, that doesn’t make some of the turns any less dark.

    As such, YHC thought it might be a honkin’ good time to share in Goose’s recovery plan. So, YHC pulled up to a Tuesday Tuff expecting (hoping for) a deluge. A torrential downpour would have turned a regular session of pain into a morning full of dirty, sloppy suffering…a type of glory known only by the protectors of Helm’s Deep and Andy Dufresne. Alas, the bad weather would hold off, which is just as well. BAPS does not like to get his little knobs wet…it makes him feel all shorted out.

    By 5:15, a PAX of 8 began – that is once we waited for Paradox to finish an anecdote about something…probably another story about the trials of playing middle school football in Homer. We ran the normal warmarama. Cadence all over the place and YHC often forgot to count because he was too busy running his mouth…probably telling another story about the trials of going to middle school in the 1940’s.
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    The Thang

    If you’ve posted with Goose enough, you know he has a lukewarm relationship with Dora 1-2-3. Even so, YHC can’t think of a thang that is more Goose-like than:

    a) doing hard ascending exercises in increments of 100,
    b) alternating with some awful form of transport (typically leg heavy), and
    c) experiencing all of the suffering with the support of a partner.

    For this morning, we would take on a Dora 1-2-3 pyramid. The ascension/descension (reps of 100, 200, 300, 200, 100) represented Goose’s path to healing. Like any physical recovery, going up and down, the rehab is sometimes seemingly impossible, sometimes surprisingly productive.

    For each transport, we emulated Goose’s progress beginning with zombie crawls and working our way up through spiderman crawls, bear crawls, flying nuns, and finally, full-out sprints around the track. By the end, the PAX would slowly and painfully work through the pyramid to achieve Goose’s full recovery, 100 Goosie’s with full sprint as transport.
    ——————————————

    It went a little something like this…

    100 burpees – switched out for jump squats in what might be the most brilliant audible in YHC’s F3 tenure (that’s right, I said tenure)

    P1 – Zombie crawl to marker, mosey back
    P2 – Jump squats
    Flapjack

    Observations:

    YHC has called on the Zombie Crawl on several occasions as a Q. For whatever reason, it ALWAYS creates havoc, leading to debate among the mutineers about what the proper form looked like. For the purposes of posterity, let’s get this settled…let those who have ears hear, those who have bad form repent.

    The Zombie Crawl is NOT an Army Crawl. The latter requires leg movement, while the former requires your entire lower body to be dragged. As posited this morning, the Zombie Crawl can include full extension of the arms. However, doing so would basically be a mobile version of Paradox’s hip dip cobra thrust he tries to pass off as a merkin. Rather, YHC believes the Zombie Crawl should be a chilcutt (elbow) plank position, while pulling a lifeless lower body…you know…basically America’s Best’s whole experience in having YHC as a partner.

    ———————————————

    200 J-Lo’s 1:1

    P1 – spiderman crawl to marker, mosey back
    P2 – J-Lo’s
    Flapjack

    Observations:

    These are so much harder than I remembered from the Lil’ Cuz Peltch beatdown around the track. Not surprisingly, Lil’ Cuz is really good at these. At this point, any real chatter began to die off. The soundtrack at this point, the “Affirmative Goose” playlist was leaning into “Glory of Love” and “Hell’s Bells.” The morning seemed to be getting darker.

    ————————————————

    300 merkins

    P1 – bear crawl to marker, mosey back
    P2 – J-Lo’s
    Flapjack

    Observations:

    America’s Best inadvertently found himself partnered with YHC for the beatdown. Having apparently drawn the short straw, he was magnanimous in his patience with YHC’s woeful merkin count each round. I don’t know how he did it. I mean, he’s a specimen sure, but my man was turning out reps like Tana in Slidell on a Tuesday with McCallister’s in tow.

    Appropriately, the Rocky IV training montage was playing at this point. Pope thought it was theme music from a Wii game (Goose you need to address that). The morning was irrelevant. By now, time was just a construct. 10 minutes left or 20 minutes, it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered except for the next rep.
    ——————————————–

    200 leg raises

    P1 – flying nuns to marker, mosey back
    P2 – merkins
    Flapjack

    Observations:

    By this time, it was clear that the YHC/AB team had fallen behind. This was not really surprising in regards to the HoneyValve.com duo, but suspicions about questionable form were beginning to creep into YHC’s mind, only confirmed by AB whispering slanderous accusations.

    Now, from time to time, YHC has been known to throw an accusation or two around concerning bad form. NOT today, however. If the form police had been on site, YHC would have been brought up on felony charges, doomed to a life of peddling cigarettes and contraband posters of Rita Hayworth, Marilyn Monroe, and Raquel Welch. We got a nice little upbeat interlude with Jurrassic 5’s “What’s Golden,” but nobody cared. There was nothing to care about. Life had lost its meaning. Salt had lost its taste. Enron had lost his sarcasm.
    —————————————

    100 Goosies

    P1 – sprint around track
    P2 – Goosies
    Flapjack

    Observations:

    YHC had no observations. Each sprint around the track was…well not a sprint. YHC was beyond regretting most of his life choices. Jefferson Airplane serenaded us to an anthem of urban development (can’t help but think this would be a great trivia question), followed by ‘Come Sail Away’ by Styx. The Stage had faded to black.

    Having repped, crawled, and ran our way through Goose’s recovery, we finished with the only thing YHC felt would be appropriate for a man that has designed multiple versions of Burpeepalooza. We did full out Burpees AMRAP for the last minute.

    COT, Paradox talked about pre-order t-shirts for 23 minutes, and Safety Valve prayed us out.

    It’s obvious that the PAX is not complete without you, Goose. That said, every beatdown, every individual posting, every ridiculous bout of mumblechatter, and every obnoxious accounting of proper form is a testament to your legacy and the incredible gift you offered us by bringing F3 to Thibodaux.

    Opportunities to lead are precious. I don’t take them for granted.

    SYITG,

    Yankee Jeaux

    Epilogue:

    As we neared the end, I realized, to my amazement, that other teams had not only finished, BUT were starting the regimen all over again. So inspiring was this achievement that I was snapped out of the darkness. Upon finishing my last lap – being the very last one to finish – a sense of gratitude welled up inside of me. In that nanosecond, I got a glimpse of what real servant leadership looks like. Mannn…this F3 stuff…am I right?

  • Leap of Faith – from Paradox

    Legend has it that Leap Day William lives in the Marianas Trench and only leaves that comfort every 4 years to swap candy for the tears of children….

    *Duke busts into the writing room*

    “No Dox , No! That’s 30 Rocks story …
    Tell your own! “

    Ahem..

    10 pax lept to the Lions Den on a windy spring morning eager to potentially meet a mythical leaping fellow. Surely he would be there ?! The GroupMe hype was crystal clear!
    Instead they found the great value branded Leap Day Williard. He only puts on sleeves if someone croaks and he crawls out from under a north La overpass every 4 years to bum a nicotine patch and exchange sweat equity for the tears of grown men. He has 45 minutes to maximize calorie burn and he definitely ain’t got time for your chatter or to pronounce simple nouns correctly.
    Those tv execs can go kick 30 Rocks , this is a real man’s Leap Day celebration!

    Even when presented with the dollar store version of a leap day hero these men stayed true to their HCs and settled in to, as one pax put it Best, Carpe that extra diem bawwwz!

    Duke! Roll that beautiful beatdown footage!

    Warmup
    YHC wrapped up some finishing touches of the pre-formation lap just in time to find that gaggle of leaplings calf stretching around Aslan. Took them through the usual fare with 29 SSH just to make sure Jeauxs HRV was still activated.
    Truncated warmups a bit to make room for a little musical leap day overture.

    Warmup Thang

    “Might As Well Jump”

    -Leap Day Trivia
    Started Van Halens “Jump” with Al Gore and Bobby Hurleys on Jump. The pax would need to guess the year the following albums were released and each correct guess would buy them 30 seconds off. White Meat (in his 3rd post in a week! T-claps ) dubbed these “discounts” and the pax would need all 4 (1 for each of the last 4 years) to reduce the song to 2 minutes of quad torture.

    Enron smelled the clue early that the answer would take place in a Leap Year. AB followed with his continued uncanny ability to dissect a competitive event into its vital organs, he haggled YHC down to 2 guesses per song.

    Songs :

    NWA released Straight Outta Compton and YHC was released Straight out of Homer in this year.? The pax waffled a bit but steered the ship back to 1988.

    Eagles – Hotel California (76)
    Jeaux got this album for his 10th birthday so this was a soft toss.

    Johnny Cash – Folsom Proson Blues (1968)
    Some rings of fire still burning from Jersey Mikes. Ya hate to see it.

    And the Finale, the song we had listened to the wholeeee time!
    Van Halen (1984)

    Da Main Thang

    Leap Cajun Leap

    2 yHC objectives here :

    1. Attempt 4 laps with 4 stations of a race with increasing burpees at the end of each , symbolizing the extra hours we tack on each year and then delete with leap day.
    2. Recall all the amazing beatdowns we had this month with creative ways of distracting us from the monotony of running.

    Formation Lap (The Circuit)

    YHC led the group in an intro of the course , this was from Safety Valves F1 beatdown. The formation lap, while revving the heart to pump your dreams, also gives you essential time for strategery. Some pax used this wisely and sized up potential partners while other choices could only be described as poi form.

    Da Stations (below) were roughly strewn around the civic center into Aldi and back to the Lion.

    Station 1 (3 cones in parking lot in a triangle )
    -From the Wet Tap Pyramid Scheme and Cardinal Ladder

    Partner Lunge Walk to cones
    Increasing partner squats then decrease
    3-5-3

    Mosey

    Station 2
    Alphabet Marathon (Enron)
    20 American Hammers
    Leap Frog to Cone
    20 Zombie Crunch

    Mosey

    Station 3 Bountiful Grace …if we can trust. (Goose beatdown)

    10 Goosies each
    Partner drag across to cone, swap
    10 Goosies each

    Mosey

    Station 4 The Poi-Son OhrWurm (YJ/AB)
    10 “Never Say Never”
    Shoulder Tap Merkins
    CrawlBear Through Volcanoes
    (To help AB conquer his lava phobia)
    If you knock one over, 5 star jumps
    10 Shoulder Tap Merkins at the end

    YHC could see the pax awaiting a layer of instructional complexity (AB has them trained) and a bag of recently purchased bandanas were presented to answer.
    As they were informed that one partner would be blindfolded and led through the lava by the sight able pax. They would then mosey to the lion in a half blindfolded trust run.

    Burpees after each round representing the excess hours that Leap Day takes care of each year.
    6-12-18-24

    Teams were carefully or chaotically selected and we had 29 minutes to see who could compete the most laps. I’ll break it down from YHCs view of each team.

    SafetySuckle (or HoneyValve, if you need a PG rating)

    One of the greatest pairings in F3 Thibodaux history these two politely crushed the pax and gave out attitude adjustments all while having a telepathic conversation about whether you should cut your lawn in concentric circles or parallel lines. They got separation early in the first volcano run and never looked back .

    JeauxDox (country rockstar vibes)

    Like the second team in the F1 pairing our job was mostly to keep steady pressure on safetysuckle and to show RonnieMeat what real form and real men look like. Things were fairly tame until we broke out the blindfolds….
    They say the loss of one sense heightens the remaining senses and as YHC tightened the knot the lights went dim but everything else intensified. The concrete beneath my feet , the grunting pax nearby in my ear, and then …what’s that …my spider senses were tingling …a smell in the air , we had surpassed verbal communication and now Jeaux was sending a flatulent telegraph to inform me he had ketchup and onions for dinner and couldn’t run that fast. A gastrointestinal bond was formed forever.

    I guess Seger was right this whole time.
    We were wild and young and free …against the wind.

    RonnieMeat

    Draped in a signature Walmart Stars and Stripes they kept a great pace. Representing finance and upper echelon poultry this was truly Americas team. They spent most of their time filing form complaints on JeauxDox that will never be processed.

    AB-Pop
    Recently YHC discovered there are mutiple genres of Asian pop (K-Pop, Mando-pop, C-Pop) and it seems the trend worked its way back west.
    In perfect synchrony this duo traversed a significant “muscle density “ differential that spawned an Eric Cartman meme and ultimately led to AB leaving the band for a solo career. Popeye could not be reached but his publicist sent a smirk emoji reply. Talks of a reunion tour are unlikely.

    The Trio
    Ponz-Cardinal-Dilly
    Multilevel marketing at its best they continued to let the pax know they would have gone further with just one more teammate. If I had just one pic of that 3 man squat it’s the only promo material we would ever need!

    At 5:59 SuckleValve had reached 2 and 3/4 lap and was declared victorious.
    We capped it off with a blindfolded race back to the flag and no ER trips.

    Counting , naming and announcements

    RCR closing day
    Thanks to everyone for all forms of locomotion and logging miles.
    Over 12k was raised for Youth Run Nola and 6k for Wibo Foundation.
    Local pax Stats breakdown and award ceremony pending…

    COT and Cardinal prayed us out

    A privilege to lead men.

    Epilogue

    Early in the beatdown planning committee as I was riffing on the different uses of Leap I came upon “Leap of Faith”. First I realized blindfolds were a must and second that the theme of trust and total surrender have been recurring a lot for YHC this lent.
    I had hopes the blindfold would be a physical challenge and maybe even slow down some of our thoroughbreds (it didn’t) but I underestimated the real fear that set in when trying to run in total darkness. Would I fall? Where was the curb? Do I look stupid? Surely we should be there by now? Am I being passed up? I fought the urge to reach up and claw it from my face and regain control. But Jeaux was there , calmly , confidently informing me that he could see everything ahead of me. After the panic stricken first lap I was ready for round 2, and as I began to feel the fear creep back in he said “grass is coming up dox, feel it on your feet”.
    That phrase has stuck with me since.

    It gave me hope and the visual of a place that was familiar.
    It has also been a reminder to me that we aren’t home yet. That most days I may be suffering, reaching , even clawing for the control I’m used to.
    But if I can accept the grace to fully surrender and know God can see the whole race then not only can I serve him but I can serve at full speed with any gift he has given. It doesn’t remove the obstacles nor alleviate the suffering but He’s there guiding , holding us, and providing the resources to serve.

    And one day, when our race has been run, when our struggle has ended and the battle is fought. That we may hear:

    “Home is coming up, you can feel it on your feet”.

    SYITG,
    Paradox

  • Choose your Poi, Son! – from America’s Best

    Unbeknownst to many, YHC spent his small kid time in Hawaii… AB was just a barefoot Haole, speaking pidgin, surfing with an alien I thought was a dog, working as a private investigator, and flying around in T.C.’s helicopter. This beatdown was inspired by those days. . .

    The PAX rolled in, totaling a dozen by the time Dilly rolled on… so we began Warmarama… a bit of a pickle since we only had 10 coupons. But, like a glorious Chesapeake Bay Retriever, Paradox broke out of the circle, leapt out in to the gloom, and returned with a giant black stick that would have to suffice.

    Island 1: Hawai’i (The Big Island):

    Constantly in fear that a volcano was about to erupt, YHC’s early visits to this island were always a bit nightmarish. We pay tribute today to this childhood fear with Volcano by the late, some-say-great, Jimmy Buffet. Hold Al Gore. Burpee on “I don’t know.” Tuck jump on “Volcano.”

    Mom Jeans’ hatred of Jimmy Buffet during this segment was noted, catalogued, and will be weaponized in a future beatdown.

    Island 2: Maui – the Man, the Myth, the Island

    The trickster demigod was definitely present during this well-planned, expertly explained, and piss-poorly executed portion of your entertainment.
    The plan was a Kola (which is the closest phonetic match to Dora, since there is no “D” or “R” in the Hawaiian alphabet). Pair up, one partner is Maui, pushing up the sky (coupon presses) while the other is his brother, tricked into pulling up islands from the sea floor(moving coupons). Then Flapjack, and 2nd partner takes over the presses while partner 1 moves the coupon back to the start. The explanation was much longer, murkier, and nobody in the PAX was clear on whether they were Maui, his brother, or themselves, so everyone was moving islands all over the ocean.

    Admittedly, this part was half-baked at best. And so YHC went into full-on Dad/Tech Support mode (“Move!”) and just walked everyone through a new version: Walk backwards, with alternating sets of curls and goblet squats. A more well-planned Maui beatdown is guaranteed next time.

    Island 3: O’ahu… choose your Poi, son!

    One of my earliest memories was at a luau, learning about poi, a Hawaiian food staple. Hard to describe, it’s a fermented paste of pounded taro root. It’s like if yogurt and sweet potato had a baby. And then you ate out of that baby’s diaper.
    Anyway, you typically classify it based on consistency: “one-finger”, “two-finger”, or “three-finger”, based on how many fingers are required to scoop it up.
    So here, participants are asked to choose which poi they want. And like poi, with each added finger it gets more runny:
    1-finger poi: Roll die, do 7x that many burpees and WWII sit-ups, with murder bunnying and bear crawling (least runny/no running)
    2-finger poi: Roll die, do that many laps with 2x that number of blockees as buy-in for each lap
    3-finger poi: Run/nur until you find the Run-Cajun-Run sticker on a lamp post; then 3 burpees and run back (most runny)

    Without hesitation, Honeysuckle chose 3 and lead the other gazelles off into the unknown gloom.
    Seeming the most innocuous, 2-finger poi proved to be the most difficult. Those were the real tough guys. . .who didn’t do the math first.
    Enron and YHC were the only two bold enough to try the 1 finger poi, and were rewarded for our bravery by finishing first.

    Final Thang: The Ring of Fire
    The Ring of Fire is also a belt of volcanos surrounding the Pacific. So we did the typical Ring of Fire, but (Inner) “Circles” by Soul Coughing was played instead of the usual Johnny Cash song…
    About 2 minutes into the ‘roid rage, YHC offered to stop the thang if anyone could ID the artist… and decided to mention “this is a 10-minute song, by the way.”
    Only Popeye had even heard this song before. And so, a minute later, desperation set in, and Yankee Jeaux jumped up to check the phone and call out the artist to stop the torture.
    The song was over anyway. YJ cheated, but YHC lied.

    Pau.
    COT and Yankee Jeaux prayed us out.

    Something for my Llamas:
    Nobody knew why that song by the Animals was played this morning amongst the Hawaii-themed music. YHC’s favorite volcano is Haleakala… which is Hawaiian for “House of the (rising) Sun.”
    Another bit of trivia for you: The Hawaiian Islands were once called the Sandwich Islands, but the name was changed because it brought too much shame when Firehouse Subs was founded.

    Tanks for coming out, bruddahs. Always an honor to lead. Great seeing the consistency of White Meat (that sounds weird) and that Ponzi is posting again on the regular. And some guy named Wilford Montana made my day by showing up (sans coffee) to join us.

    SYITG,

    AB

  • Disaster on Grass about the Miracle on Ice, by Coyote – from Goose

                Thankfully, no mosquitoes tormented the Pax & YHC as we started the beatdown with the normal warmups. But what wasn’t normal was when YHC called “A skips.” No one but Pope and YHC could get the skip part down, so at what we thought was number thirteen, YHC had to call an untuned Halt and we switched to high knees & butt kicks.
    YHC explained that YHC doesn’t go to weekday beatdowns, so February 24, 2024, was going to be about February 22, 1980, the Miracle on Ice.
    A quick mosey to the field by bayou road, YHC explained that the US hockey team, a group of nobody college students at the time, beat the best team in the world, the unstoppable Soviet Union, 4-3. YHC asked a few questions about the event, and the Pax answered both correctly, the prize being four burpees. YHC then said how the US’s coach, Herb Brooks, said, “I’m not here to be your friend, I’m here to be your coach.” He said he would work his team HARD. So YHC said he would work the Pax HARD. We started simple, three suicide runs across the field. Then we got into it.
    First, Vladimir Krutov scored, so we spelled Krutov in alphabet form, spelling the words with our legs down on our six. What came after was to come in between every single goal: we ran another suicide run and did three burpees. YHC said that if the US scored, we would do four burpees, and if the Soviets scored, we would do three. We continued to do this, spelling the last names of Buzz Schneider, Sergei Makarov, Mark Johnson, Aleksander Maltsev, Mark Johnson again, and Mike Eruzione. (Doing twenty one-is-one Goofballs for the soviet coach’s dumb switch from the best goalie in the world to his backup in between Mark Johnson’s first goal and Aleksander Maltsev.)
    After Mike Eruzione’s famous goal, we did twenty one-is-one genuflections for the famous picture of the failed block. We played the last minute of the event, doing mission impossible plank because of how impossible it was. Then we did the normal exercises to thunderstruck because of how thunderstruck the soviets were. The song cut short twice, so we just played the hillbilly version. We played a song called Victory because of the US’s victory. During the entire song, we held Al Gore, doing various leg exercises on YHC’s call. We straggled back to the flag, beaten down hard. The number of Pax was second place overall for most PAX at a beatdown, twenty strong. Animal went to Cardinal for his amazing, attention-getting shoes. That capped off the Disaster on Grass about the Miracle on Ice.

  • The Ohrwurm, Part 1 – from Yankee Joe

    PAX: Smooth Operator, Maneater, JackKnife, Paradox, Enron, Honeysuckle, America’s Best, Safety Valve, Popeye, Ponzi, French Horn, Paradiddle, Yankee Jeaux

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    How It Started

    Coming off of “It’s Only Just Maybe Somewhat Close to Nearly a Mile (allegedly)” this past Saturday (again, huge T-claps to Paradox!), YHC’s knees…well all the body parts, were on the struggle bus. It’s been a rough road lately, and YHC has missed more beatdowns in the past two months than ever before. It started to feel like I was drifting away from F3. History has shown that far greater pickleballers than I have gone down that dark path, never to return.

    You have to fight everyday to keep the fartshackles off.

    As such, YHC reluctantly limped out to the IOJMSCTNM event. As expected, the event destroyed my body. Unexpectedly, it reinvigorated my spirit and commitment to the PAX.

    It’s a paradox…well, no…actually, it’s ironic…unless of course, you weren’t expecting the contradiction in the first place, in which case, you’re a stupid smart oxymoron. Of course, if all you needed was a knife or it rained on your wedding day, then it’s NOT ironic…it just sucks to be you.

    The reality is that these struggles exist Around The World, but if you Never Say Never, remembering to always Give It Up (to God), you’ll be in high Cotton able to keep your PopEye on Jeaux.

    How is YHC so wise? Because, like Bieber, Jeaux IS the forever Q of your Kenna Brah hawt. Yo Ronnie!

    Soooo, for the first time in nearly a year, YHC will post 4 of 4 beatdowns this week, and I gotta tell you…it feels good, like honeysucklin’ good, like blast your French Horn from the top of the Ponzi pyramid good, like Valve Diddlin’ good.

    ————————————

    We got a good recovery Goosing on Monday, resting the legs, and lighting up the man boobs. Tuesday’s Dox/Ronnie DJ Deck of Death was just what the “Doctor” had ordered – recovery strength work accompanied by “good music.”

    For Thursday’s beatdown, YHC, still wary of his pulsating ITBS, looked to carry on the recovery, slowly re-introducing some running, but bringing in some more full body cardio. To do this, we needed inspiration in the form of catchy songs that would stick with you for daysssss, thus annoying all of your colleagues and family members alike.

    As America’s Best noted, this phenomenon is oft referred to as an “earworm.” Even more appropriate coming from AB is that the term was originally dubbed by German scientists (ohrwurm) to describe a few bars of music that get stuck in your brain. For those PAX who believe they are of German heritage, this might be of interest. Maybe you sent me pictures of your German genealogy certificates, maybe they were made at FedEx Kinkos. We’ll never know.

    —————————————–

    YHC rolled in slowly and deliberately at 5:13am, windows rolled down, Sirius (not the streaming radio service) blasting like it was Chicago, 1996. My inspiration for the dramatic entrance was of course drawn from various Paradox Q’s. I was excited to get his approval…unfortunately, he was late and didn’t see it. I can count on two fingers how many of his Q’s I’ve missed…and I’ve never once been late. Hey…friendships are just viewed differently in North Louisiana.

    As we got started, YHC was pumped to see Ponzi repping the ANIMAL, along with the Anthony Davis undershirt. Also, having the Maneater/Jackknife combo back in the mix only added much needed energy to the PAX.

    But as exciting as that all was, during warmarama, YHC still kept looking to his left. Assuming that my last eye check-up with AB had been grossly mishandled, I kept squinting in the gloom at a familiar figure. It couldn’t be. My brain could not reconcile the eyeworm residual of French Horn. Could it really be him? Sho’ nuff, as we later began our first run, I heard it. I heard the old but comforting greeting, “Bruhhhhhh.” It could be. It was. Horn had finally come home.

    ————————————
    How It Went

    Warm-up (5:15 – 5:25)

    Side straddle hops
    Windmills 15 ct
    Arm circles forward 15 ct
    Arm circles backward 15 ct
    Lafayette night clubs 15 ct
    Self love 15 ct
    High knees 15 ct
    Butt Kicks 15 ct
    Mountain climbers 14ct

    The morning would consist of four songs with trigger word exercises. Before each song, the PAX would run to the far side of the civic center, do 50 reps of a certain exercise, then complete the lap and do 50 more reps in front of the civic center. Each round would consist of different run exercises. (in total approx. 1.2 miles)

    There were too many earworm song candidates to choose from, so YHC settled on four showcase songs and a handful of running songs all carefully curated to worm their way into the PAX’s collective conscience. The trick was to have music at homebase in front of the civic center as well as on the run. YHC couldn’t (or wouldn’t) carry BAPS all over creation, so he connected BAPS to Bose (pr. Bozay) for a hopefully seamless transition of music between base and laps around the civic center.

    —————————————-

    The Earworm Pt. 1 (5:25 – 5:33)

    – lap around civic center, stopping two times at exercise stations
    – Exercise: chilcutt jacks, x50 each stop
    – Song: Never Say Never by Justin Bieber (requested by Paradox)
    == Alternating shoulder taps throughout
    == Merkin on “never” or “forever” or “pick it up”

    *This was meant to be funny. It wasn’t. The assault on our ears and pecks was nasty. I think the PAX was confused and felt generally awkward. Paradox was in his element.

    ———————————————

    The Earworm Pt 2 (5:33 – 5:42)

    – lap around civic center, stopping two times at exercise stations
    – Exercise: Flutters 4:1, x50 each stop
    – Song: Around The World by Daft Punk (requested in September by French Horn)
    == Jogging in place
    == Full body Drop downs to chest (similar to flying squirrels) on every Around The World.

    *If you’re not familiar, the only words in this song ARE ‘Around The World’. Safety Valve and Paradiddle literally looked bored, as if waiting for a real challenge. Meanwhile, YHC just started falling down, would get back up to his knees, then flop down again like a beached cod. This is the day the chatter died, and we weren’t singing S%#&.

    ——————————————-

    The Earworm Pt 3 (5:42 – 5:50)

    – lap around civic center, stopping two times at exercise stations
    – Exercise: J-Lo’s, x50 each stop
    – Song: Cotton Eye Joe by Rednex (requested by America’s Best)
    == Man singing – bonnie blair’s
    == Banjo/Fiddle – hillbilly squats; leg thrust out to the side, thumbs in belt
    == Women singing – burpees

    *The Bonnie’s, following the song prior, were nearly impossible. There was confusion as to whether it was a woman singing or if Bieber is a lot older than we thought. Across the gloom, I could see a distinct and calculating smirk on Smooth’s face. A face that meant one thing…we’d see this in a Q coming soon to an AO near you.

    **In the misery, AB somehow found a way to correct YHC that the “banjo” solos were in fact fiddle solos. For crying out loud, what do you want from me? I’m a non-tenured instructor at a quasi bankrupt regional state university. Thibodaux is lucky I bother to put on pants each morning.

    ——————————————–

    The Earworm Pt 4 (5:50 – 5:57)

    – lap around civic center, stopping two times at exercise stations
    – Exercise: LBC’s, x50 each stop
    – Song: Baby Give it Up by KC and The Sunshine Band, Ivan Jack remix (requested over and over again by Honeysuckle)
    == imperial squat walker
    == Squat jump on “baby give it up”

    *The crown jewel of YHC’s collection. The Ivan Jack remix is solid platinum bronzed pewter. The imperial squat walkers started to burn early on. The jump squats were hard to do with any semblance of rhythm, and the song just kept going and going and going. We just kept giving it up to the point we expected payment for our services.

    ————————————————

    We finished with two minutes of all AMRAP LBC’s to the gangnam stylings of PSY.

    COT, ANIMAL bestowed on Popeye. He “gets” Ponzi. Apparently some Southern Louisiana PAX view friendships in a more wholesome light. The VESTments were inVESTed in the muse of the Earworm beatdown, the Best of the Best. ‘Merica.

    Prayer intentions, including traveling PAX, Enron’s M, and Goose (and M) leading a marriage retreat in Wisconsin.

    Enron prayed us out.

    In the words of F3 Bieber, Never Say Never.

    Yankee Eye Jeaux

  • DJ DOD Volume 4: Greatest Hits – from Paradox

    “Shouldn’t they teach that in school?!”

    It’s the conversation you’ve all had with friends or family and many topics can go into the open blank.

    Taxes, tire changes, bonnie blair’s..you name it, there’s somethings we would all add to the formation of our youth. We can all see the value of teaching and learning everyday life skills at the peak age of brain elasticity and thats where my newest form of learning comes in. The ultra secret 3-man groupme trivia league?! No..sorry, I’ve sworn an oath not to discuss that publicly and some hearts just aren’t ready to talk about it. What I’m referring to is my degree from the streetz. For the last 2 years I’ve been auditing classes from Dr. Jeauxs FLEX MBA (major ballin assets). No classroom for this stuff, you just have to be in close proximity and absorb these little wisdom nuggets . This semester we have really been diving deep into some great discussions in SELF PROMOTION SYSTEMS 5000. As we’ve seen from French Horn TMZ videos and from his own monologues this man can flat out teach. I’ve learned two major rules of the road from his mastery during BEATDOWN FRANCHISES 800 this semester.

    #1 Standardized production. Like watching Dilly bomb a drive 225 every single swing, the customer craves to know that the product will be the same repeatable quality. Why is the line always 20 deep at canes. You know the sauce is waiting and the caniac hasn’t changed!

    #2 Brand Recognition. Let the customer take solace in knowing the product is there for them. When you see the McD’s arch you don’t think about processed chemicals, just the taste of awesome fries. And when you see the DJ/card dealer gifs hit the groupme at 9pm the back of the brain says there will be pain but other guy in the midbrain with the mullet says you should totes NOT miss brah!!

    So when YHC was determining a suitable theme for a Tuesday Tuff with multiple pax (yhc included) in the walking dead category it was only right to return to the GREATEST HITS. YHC dialed up Ronnie over at Bayou Lafource Studios (yo dis P..who dis?) and his schedule was wide open for a pitt boss gig. With increasing franchise success, we would use the professor’s rules to keep the production the same great quality you all know and love but sprinkle in a little “fan servicing” (heck, it works for Disney) with previous hits and limited running for joint preservation.

    DUKE! Get the cards, its DJ DOD VOLUME 4 !! Roll the beautiful footage!

    Warmup
    YHC rolled in hot after a failed attempt at Pope pickup but just in time to give a disclaimer for a mystery FNG! We got in the usuals with a bumper mosey that was eerily quiet as pax waited to see if this was a precursor for more running. It was the only .25 we attempted.

    A round of 21s followed just to make sure YHC had the pax full attention and several infractions led to 10 OYO burpees.

    THA THANG

    FORMAT: DJ (songs w/ triggers) followed by DOD- Ronnie Picks the game (blackjack, battle, poker etc)

    If you ‘re keeping track at home the previous 3 installments were:

    DJ DOD
    DJ DOD Volume 2: She’s A Brick House
    DJ DOD Volume 3: Fat Tuesday Tuff

    YHC hand selected a tune from each for todays Greatest Hits montage, mostly the ones that elicited the highest mix of grumbling and muscle growth.

    Round 1:
    Hey Ya- OutKast
    Coupons Side Shuffles on song with thrusters on Hey (down) Ya (up)
    This was a heater early but you know the Ole baseball trick, First pitch is always an inside the plate fastball to give the catcher some space to operate.

    DOD: High Card- Derkins, Chuck Norris Merkins, Freak Nastys (dips)

    I’d like to issue a formal apology for Valve and Jeaux who were the only attendees to survive this unlucky draw AND Gooses 70,000 merkin beatdown on Monday. T-claps.

    Round 2:
    Whip and Nae Nae from Silento
    Hold plank on song
    Merkins on Whip
    Side Reach on Nae Nae
    Leg raise on Stanky Leg
    MC on Break Yo leg
    **Editors Note- Need an exercise for “Bop”

    DOD: LBCs, Carolina Dry Docks, Bulgarian Split Squats

    Round 3
    “Ring of Fire” Johnny Cash
    Bearcrawls around Picnic table- Merkins on Fire
    Reports from Ponzi post beatdown of a lifelong cure of hemorrhoids just by realizing the true meaning of the song.

    DOD black jack: Leg Raises, Bonnie Blairs

    Round 4- a “bonus track” on the greatest hits album to make sure they come back hungry

    Destinys Child “Say My Name”
    Coupon High Knees- Coupon Curls on “Name”

    Wrap up with a traditional DJ DOD burnout song
    Calvin Harris – Too Close
    Freddy Mercuries till 6 am

    Counting, Naming and…AN FNG

    Our mystery FNG revealed himself as the cousin of NOLA’s Reluctant Yankee
    He was part of the amazing hosting team for the IOAM and came to see what the fuss was about.
    With great deliberation we landed on a combination of his address and hobbies with …WHITE MEAT
    Welcome man, Solid work and looking forward to seeing your progress out here.

    Prayer with solid Intentions as we continue through Lent with many ill and traveling.

    Thank you all for participating in the latest edition of DJ DOD, like any great temporary product (I see you McRib), it will return… when you least expect it but when you need it the most.

    It’s a privilege to lead.

    SYITG
    Paradox

  • The Alphabet Marathon – from Enron

    In preparation for this morning’s beatdown, YHC had the task of coming up with something that would incorporate enough running to be effective for Run Cajun Run milage, as well as keep the PAX’s minds off previously mentioned running. A few months back an idea to go through the alphabet with various exercises had arisen and YHC thought this might be the perfect opportunity to put it in place.

    10 strong staggered in on a chilly morning at the Stage only to be greeted by a couple children’s drawing books laid out on the concrete. On those two books were the letters of the alphabet with corresponding exercises written on them. Naturally, that sparked a little bit of chatter only to be stopped by circling up that PAX to start the warmup.

    Warmarama:
    SSH, WM, Willie Mays Hayes, AC, Cherry Pickers, Self-Love, IW
    The 1 and Only Thang:
    The Alphabet Marathon

    Attention was drawn to the drawing boards where the letters of the alphabet were written, next to each letter was a corresponding exercise. The instructions were to perform 30 of each exercise (30 seconds of some), then run a lap around the stage after each letter’s exercise was complete. The lap is .12 miles, meaning that if the entire alphabet was completed, that PAX would have run 3.12 miles.
    The letters and exercises were as follows:
    A- American Hammers
    B- Big Boy Sit Ups – This was a last-minute decision to scratch burpees off the list. A gracious Q indeed.
    C- Coupon Curls
    D- Dips
    E- Elbow Plank (30 seconds)
    F- Flutter Kicks (2=1)
    G- Gore (Al) (30 seconds)
    H- Humpers (Monkey)
    I- Imperial Walkers
    J- J-Lo’s
    K- Kettlebell Swings
    L- Lunges 1=1
    M- Merkins
    N- No’s(Oh) – Somehow almost forgot this letter
    O- Overhead Press
    P- Pickle Pounders
    Q- Q’s Choice – This ended up being LBCs
    R- Reverse Crunches
    S- Side Straddle Hops
    T- Toy Soldiers
    U- Up Straddle Hops – A 1 legged Side Straddle hop which made for an interesting sight
    V- V-Ups
    W- World War 1 Sit ups
    X- X-Wings
    Y- Yul Brynner’s
    Z- Zombie Crunches

    Prior to this morning, YHCs belief was that none of the PAX would be close to completion of the alphabet. This assumption was incorrect as Goose, Pope, and Honeysuckle, were very close to completion with only the letter Z left to complete when “recover” was called. Also, there were many other of the group that were very close behind. This may be one that has a redo to see where progress is made.
    Great work by all this morning. The variation was enjoyed and the milage still abundant. Always great to continue to push ourselves with this crew.
    Announcements and the inVESTment was passed from Honeysuckle to Goose
    COT and Paradox prayed us out.

    SYITG,

    Enron

  • Running Against the Wind – from Paradox

    9 strong at the den on a crisp first day of February. A fine month for running. YHC had three objectives today: Unravel an 80s album cover mystery, Camouflage running with a point system and continue to honor the life of service lived by Bishop Dorsonville.
    The RCR hype train was at a full speed choo choo by Wednesday evening and now it was time to back up the chatter with some work.

    Duke! Its Run Cajun Run month
    Stop carb loading and roll the beautiful footage.

    Warmup
    SSH- IW- toy soldiers – AC both ways

    Noted that YHC, Valve and Ronnie were outnumberd 3-6 by the Built this Thibby enemy squadron today. With Honeysuckles 1000 mile stare after showing up on foot and Popeyes safety vest they are an intimidating bunch. Return of JV can only hope CVS runs out of knee braces and Metamucil soon. Cant wait to see how Darth Fartsack responds to this attack on his teammates.

    Continued warm up…

    YHC met Bishop Dorsonville at OLOPs this summer and along with sharing repeated jokes about Cardinals arm circles with him I was also drawn to how he made complete strangers comfortable with silly jokes. Still cracks me up thinking of it and that’s where we’ll begin this beatdown, with the power of humor to break the ice …or sore muscles.

    I’m not sure if you guys grew up with a single hilarious trigger word in your childhood. But for YHC if there was a single noun that turned YHC and his siblings into cackling hyenas it was “commode”. Even now as a semi grown man of 35 years it makes me giggle. I can’t really explain why but just the mention of it , especially by some older prim and proper family member in polite context would set off such a riot that only threatened bodily harm could contain us. So on Tuesday Tuff when Goose and Popeye convinced YHC that there was an actual band called Depeche Mode it triggered YHCs 8 year old brain into snickering all day that it sounded like a really really fancy French toilet. Which brings us to today’s extended warmup. YHC had a song ready and requested the Artist, # of band members and meaning of the aforementioned artist . Goose saw this one coming a mile away and was ready and waiting to help the pax take 30 seconds of pain away by guessing Depeche Mode ( before a single note played ), AB deducted another 30 by correctly guessing 4 original band members. No luck on finding the meaning of this mysterious phrase but I hope today as you sit upon your commode and think about it , that your bowel movement is neither fashionable nor hurried.

    – Depeche Mode
    “just can’t get enough “

    High Knees/Butt Kicks
    Burpee on “Get enough”

    We got enough.

    -The Thang

    With the knees high and and butts kicked we checked off objective #1.
    YHC now switched gears into our main run event. Several of us today would likely attend or honor the celebration of life for Bishop Dorsonville. Even in his short time here quite a few of our pax had interactions or bonds with him that will last a lifetime. In prayer and reflection two major points stuck out to me that I wanted to highlight. Both points deal with the unknown variables that God may ask us to accept in His will.
    Bishop couldn’t have known much about this little bayou community and even more unknown was how long he would be here. He dove into both with unrelenting service until he was called home.

    So to honor the act of service with unknown variables YHC built a run course with 4 options.
    The exercise at the station and the time of rounds would be a mystery.
    You can complete any station as many times as you want or not at all.

    The Stations:
    (Measured via strava)

    #1 1/8th mile – 1 point
    to top of reservoir and back – bearcrawl to top, 10 Bonnie Blair’s , bearcrawl to the bottom

    #2 1/4 mile – 1 lap around auditorium , at cone complete 10 no cheat merkins , run back

    #3 1/3 mile – to bball court
    15 star jumps at cone
    -cone flip option, 5 tries and if you land it you can skip the star jumps. Miss and you double the reps.

    #4 1/2 mile
    Far side of reservoir and complete the loop. 15 Jillian Michaels
    -optional dice roll to reduce your Reps or increase (5-30 on dice)

    Complete all 4 – (3 point bonus)

    YHC added distraction options at station 3-4 to highlight that even when Gods plan for us is clear there will always be other paths that look easy or even fruitful. Some may even utilize our natural talents and through prayer may be useful. I left it to the pax to choose wisely.

    Round 1 – Solo (12 minutes)
    – YHC loved watching AB and Goose pick the course apart. These guys are bloodhounds for the most efficient points in a game.
    – Several pax took the honorable path at completing all 4 distances but Jillian Michael was not a fan favorite.
    – In the end Pope got some after the whistle credit and edged out AB 19-16. Pope gave us a respectable 20 lunges and we thanked him.

    Round 2 – (10 min)
    split into teams but 1 pax must stay at home base doing SSH at all times (swaps out)

    -the secret was now out that station 3 was the best run for your money and both teams headed there in a wad of heavy breathing. The cone flipping didn’t get any easier and many star jumps were done .

    Team 2 was the victor 40-36 and doled out 10 tempo merkins.

    Thang Finale : 3 min 20 seconds
    Bob Seger – Against the wind

    YHC dialed up a little Bob Seger for some February run hype and after some discussion the pax decided correctly that it, just like awful British techno, had been released in 1980.
    Random Ab exercises on song with leg raise on “against the wind”

    Counting, Naming , Investing

    Valve passed along the investment to the cone flipping savant AB who , dare I say it, wore it in a hurried fashion!

    Announcement:

    RCR – Log your miles

    Swag is on link if you want to support the charities further.

    Feb 17 It’s Only a Mile

    Bunkhouse this Sunday
    Text me if you want in or would like to provide a side or rolls. (Serve 30-50)
    Leave from stage at 4:20
    Back by 6:30ish

    COT and Lox prayed us out

    Men, I’m grateful for the opportunity to lead you and to be strengthened by your own examples of service.

    SYITG
    Dox

  • Free Solo 2: Struggler’s Run – from America’s Best

    YHC pulled up at least 7 or 8 minutes early to find overly-zealous Enron and Paradox at the Stage, arriving early to gossip. The rest of the PAX poured in, slowly, gradually, like some sort of sweet viscous substance…

    Warmarama – typical SSH, toy soldiers, windmills, arm circles, then a curve ball… butt-kicks straight into high knees? For some men, the muscle memory kicked in, and the knees went up before the brains even knew what was happening. Overall, there seemed to be a very mixed reaction to this, and YHC was afraid for a moment there may be a Q coup.

    Pre-thang:
    Last time YHC put on a “Free Solo” beatdown, we had extra time and went into an OT “make it stop” name that tune-athon. Due to this, and with RCR coming up, YHC decided to start this one with a run.
    Indian Run while the Wu-Thang plunked out music of mostly bands with misleading names. The goal is to guess how many band members are in said band. The difference between your guess and the actual is the number of exercises we do at each stop.
    Popeye impressed, calling out Arcade Fire immediately, and them even more impressively, MJ knew (or guessed?) that there were 5 members. No extra work!
    The Thompson Twins were next, and of course the trick was that there are 3 members, but we only had to do one merkin, as Wet Tap was called upon and (understandably) guessed 2.
    Next we nurred, as a hint, hoping someone could guess “Feels like we Only Go Backwards” by Tame Impala. The guess was 4, but there is only one member in this “band.” We did 3 BBS.
    The next was my favorite, and it was even better because we had already done BBS and merkins, so the next had to be burpees. Nobody knew the Polyphonic Spree song (also titled “Hold Me Now”) so our buy in was 5 burpees.
    Pope was called upon to be the scapegoat (by the way, the person who was randomly chosen to guess each time was the person who happened to stop closest to the streetlight).
    Pope guessed 5 (I think, or 8), but there are 27 members of this ridiculous band, so either way it was Samsonite. So we did a lot of burpees.
    Goose nailed Bungle in the Jungle by Jethro Tull, and someone (Enron) knew there were 4 members. No extra work. Honeysuckle called Superman by Five for Fighting, but Dox thought there were most likely 5 members of this one-man band.

    Back at the start for the Real Thang: FREE SOLO 2
    The Rules: A solo from a song is played while we all do some kind of work. The song is curated for a single individual in the attending PAX. 3 things with slightly different results occur:
    1. The person for whom the song was chosen IDs the song. Result= all PAX bear crawl 20 yards “free” of gear (coupon), then lunge walk back. Everyone takes “victory lap.”
    2. Some other dude identifies the song, freeing himself from the burden of the coupon. Everyone else block-bears up and lunge-walks with coupon back. Dude takes a victory lap while rest of PAX continues work.
    3. Nobody IDs the song everyone murder-bunnies up, and rifle carries back, then does “sprint of defeat” to flag and back

    As we began, Wet Tap busted out of the gates like a thing that busts out of gates busting out of a gate.
    He ID’d the first two songs without even knowing what was happening, stealing Dox’s and Pope’s songs as well as Pope’s thunder. And he took 2 victory laps in a row while we continued the work.
    Popeye’s musical chops impressed again, identifying his solo from “When Doves Cry.”
    YHC was downright giddy when he saw Goldilox pull in this morning… I’ve been waiting to play this smooth jazz sax solo from “Too Hot.” Nobody knew the song… I guess all these Millennials think “Kool and the Gang” is just something Samuel L. Jackson said. (And in case you missed it, “too hot” is something Goldilocks said).
    Enron ID’d “Money” but YHC suspects fowl play. No, not foul.
    “Honeybee” Tom Petty. Nobody knows that old fart, apparently.
    For the fledgling pilot, “Learning to Fly.” Again. Free Solo 1 brought us this song by old fart Tom Petty. This time, same title, different song, different band. Nobody knew it.
    Overall, I know, too much Pink Floyd.
    Evident next during what is arguably one of the best and most recognizable guitar solos ever. As we did thrusters, Goose prodded Wet Tap to ID “Comfortably Numb.”
    Tap’s response: “I’d rather just keep doing Thrusters.”
    (Time ran out before Dilly’s and MJ’s songs could be unveiled… to be concluded)

    COT: Count-o-rama, Name-o-rama,

    Animal was bestowed upon Picadilly.

    Honey-o-rama courtesy of The Beekeeper (aka Honeysuckle)

    Thanks for putting up with my nonsense once again, fellas.

    SYITG,
    AB

  • Free Solo 2: Struggler’s Run – from America’s Best

    YHC pulled up at least 7 or 8 minutes early to find overly-zealous Enron and Paradox at the Stage, arriving early to gossip. The rest of the PAX poured in, slowly, gradually, like some sort of sweet viscous substance…

    Warmarama – typical SSH, toy soldiers, windmills, arm circles, then a curve ball… butt-kicks straight into high knees? For some men, the muscle memory kicked in, and the knees went up before the brains even knew what was happening. Overall, there seemed to be a very mixed reaction to this, and YHC was afraid for a moment there may be a Q coup.

    Pre-thang:
    Last time YHC put on a “Free Solo” beatdown, we had extra time and went into an OT “make it stop” name that tune-athon. Due to this, and with RCR coming up, YHC decided to start this one with a run.
    Indian Run while the Wu-Thang plunked out music of mostly bands with misleading names. The goal is to guess how many band members are in said band. The difference between your guess and the actual is the number of exercises we do at each stop.
    Popeye impressed, calling out Arcade Fire immediately, and them even more impressively, MJ knew (or guessed?) that there were 5 members. No extra work!
    The Thompson Twins were next, and of course the trick was that there are 3 members, but we only had to do one merkin, as Wet Tap was called upon and (understandably) guessed 2.
    Next we nurred, as a hint, hoping someone could guess “Feels like we Only Go Backwards” by Tame Impala. The guess was 4, but there is only one member in this “band.” We did 3 BBS.
    The next was my favorite, and it was even better because we had already done BBS and merkins, so the next had to be burpees. Nobody knew the Polyphonic Spree song (also titled “Hold Me Now”) so our buy in was 5 burpees.
    Pope was called upon to be the scapegoat (by the way, the person who was randomly chosen to guess each time was the person who happened to stop closest to the streetlight).
    Pope guessed 5 (I think, or 8), but there are 27 members of this ridiculous band, so either way it was Samsonite. So we did a lot of burpees.
    Goose nailed Bungle in the Jungle by Jethro Tull, and someone (Enron) knew there were 4 members. No extra work. Honeysuckle called Superman by Five for Fighting, but Dox thought there were most likely 5 members of this one-man band.

    Back at the start for the Real Thang: FREE SOLO 2
    The Rules: A solo from a song is played while we all do some kind of work. The song is curated for a single individual in the attending PAX. 3 things with slightly different results occur:
    1. The person for whom the song was chosen IDs the song. Result= all PAX bear crawl 20 yards “free” of gear (coupon), then lunge walk back. Everyone takes “victory lap.”
    2. Some other dude identifies the song, freeing himself from the burden of the coupon. Everyone else block-bears up and lunge-walks with coupon back. Dude takes a victory lap while rest of PAX continues work.
    3. Nobody IDs the song everyone murder-bunnies up, and rifle carries back, then does “sprint of defeat” to flag and back

    As we began, Wet Tap busted out of the gates like a thing that busts out of gates busting out of a gate.
    He ID’d the first two songs without even knowing what was happening, stealing Dox’s and Pope’s songs as well as Pope’s thunder. And he took 2 victory laps in a row while we continued the work.
    Popeye’s musical chops impressed again, identifying his solo from “When Doves Cry.”
    YHC was downright giddy when he saw Goldilox pull in this morning… I’ve been waiting to play this smooth jazz sax solo from “Too Hot.” Nobody knew the song… I guess all these Millennials think “Kool and the Gang” is just something Samuel L. Jackson said. (And in case you missed it, “too hot” is something Goldilocks said).
    Enron ID’d “Money” but YHC suspects fowl play. No, not foul.
    “Honeybee” Tom Petty. Nobody knows that old fart, apparently.
    For the fledgling pilot, “Learning to Fly.” Again. Free Solo 1 brought us this song by old fart Tom Petty. This time, same title, different song, different band. Nobody knew it.
    Overall, I know, too much Pink Floyd.
    Evident next during what is arguably one of the best and most recognizable guitar solos ever. As we did thrusters, Goose prodded Wet Tap to ID “Comfortably Numb.”
    Tap’s response: “I’d rather just keep doing Thrusters.”
    (Time ran out before Dilly’s and MJ’s songs could be unveiled… to be concluded)

    COT: Count-o-rama, Name-o-rama,

    Animal was bestowed upon Picadilly.

    Honey-o-rama courtesy of The Beekeeper (aka Honeysuckle)

    Thanks for putting up with my nonsense once again, fellas.

    SYITG,
    AB