F3 New Orleans

Tag: Jingle Vader

  • DEFENDANTS’ MOTION TO DISMISS COMPLAINT – from Jingle Vader

    IN THE COURT OF PUBLIC OPINION FOR THE REGION OF NEW ORLEANS

    F3 NATION, et al.
    Plaintiffs,
    v.

    F3 NOLA, JINGLE VADER (Q), et al.
    Defendants

    Civil Action No. 24-0001

    DEFENDANTS’ MOTION TO DISMISS COMPLAINT

    In the matter of F3 NOLA vs. F3 Nation, the defendants, hereafter referred to as F3 NOLA, hereby move for dismissal of the charges brought forth by F3 Nation. The allegations assert that individuals participating in workouts at Wolfpack Mountain fail to produce a summary of their activities, commonly referred to as a “Backblast.”

    I. Grounds for Dismissal:

    1. The defendants plead that their reluctance to provide a Backblast is rooted in their status as Luddites, demonstrating an aversion to modern technological practices.

    2. F3 NOLA asserts that their indifference extends beyond matters unrelated to Uptown New Orleans, rendering the requirement for a Backblast irrelevant to their operational ethos.

    3. The defendants argue that the language employed in workouts is often unsuitable for a professional environment, thus justifying their refusal to produce such documentation.

    4. F3 NOLA contends that the imposition of Backblasts may inadvertently subject them to unwarranted scrutiny regarding allegations of child abuse, posing a potential risk to their reputation.

    5. The defendants maintain that their objection to Backblasts is grounded in their general aversion to being directed or supervised, asserting their autonomy in matters related to workout documentation.

    In light of the aforementioned grounds, F3 NOLA respectfully requests this Honorable Court to grant the motion to dismiss, thereby absolving them of the charges brought forth by F3 Nation and allowing them to focus on Side Straddle Hops, Low Slow Squats, Burpees, Hillbillies, Blimp Ladders, Dora and Mary (which includes Twisties).

    Dated: January 12, 2024

    Respectfully submitted,

    JINGLE VADER
    Workout Q
    :HC

  • Misty Mountain – 1-6-2024 – from Almonaster

    A stroll up “Beary” Mountain!

    PAX:

    – Gabby
    – Hawgcycle
    – Douille
    – Couch
    – Jingle Vader
    – Subprime
    – Brown Bag
    – O’Douls
    – Tiny Tot
    – 8-Ball
    – El Guapo
    – Rudy
    – Dax
    – Tubesteak
    – Tomahawk
    – King Kong
    – Willie
    – Almonaster

    Mosey to Palm Circle.

    Warmup:
    SSH – 20 IC
    Arm Circles -10 IC
    Reverse Arm Circles – 10 IC
    Imperial Walkers – 10 IC
    The Morpheus – 10 IC
    Balance on 1 foot for 10 seconds – each
    Grass Grabbers – 10 IC
    Windmills – 10 IC
    Mountain Climbers – 10 IC

    The Thang:

    Mosey to the Base of the “Beary” Mountain.

    Bear crawl up the ramp to the 2nd level.

    We proceeded with 10’s and 20’s exercises on each end of the Mountain. We traveled all of the way to the top deck and then descended down with two sets on the below levels.
    QUICK FACTS ABOUT BEARS
    There are around 180,000 to 200,000 brown bears worldwide. Most of them live in Alaska, Canada and Russia where the brown bear can still roam vast areas almost unpopulated by human beings and covered in forests.
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    The brown bear can reach a weight of between 150 and 370 kilogrammes depending on age, sex and season.
    – LBC’s – 20 IC
    Despite their weight, the animals can cover short distances at speeds of up to 50 km/h.
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    Brown bears are generally loners who will only seek a mate for short periods.
    – Squats – 20 IC
    At birth, bear cubs are blind and naked.
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    In the wild, these omnivores spend up to 16 hours a day looking for food, which is reflected in the saying ‘hungry as a bear’.
    – Freddie Mercury’s – 20 IC
    Bears have a particularly good nose: their sense of smell enables them to sniff food at a distance of several kilometres.
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    Brown bears in the wild are mainly active at dusk and at night.
    – Lunges – 20 IC
    In the wild, brown bears can reach a maximum age of between 20 and 30 years. In captivity, they can get even older.
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    The brown bear is the largest predator still living on the continent of Europe.
    – Penguins – 20 IC
    Descend two levels
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    – Bobby Hurley’s – 20 IC
    Descend one level
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    – Vladimir Douille’s – 20 IC
    Back to Flag
    Birthdays
    Anniversaries
    Announcements
    Intentions
    Prayer

    Thanks for the opportunity to Lead!

  • Coin Flip – from Tinkles

    First Q of the year so I’ll try a backblast! Hoping it sticks!

    Looking for something a little different we tried a coin flip beat down. Heads = an exercise, Tails = an exercise. If head or tails is hit two times in a row, that exercise is retired and replaced with a new one. The concept has potential.

    Warm up: standard items.

    We started out with heads = burpees, tails = long running loop. First two flips were heads and burpees were dropped for squats. Everyone recalled the probability word problem from 5th grade and deduced this had a 1/8 chance of happening. The 4th heads in a row at a chance of 1/16 did not happen. The whole workout:

    10 burpees
    10 burpees
    30 squats
    Long loop
    30 squats
    30 squats
    Long loop
    15 jump squats
    Long loop
    Long loop
    15 jump squats
    Short loop
    15 jump squats
    15 jump squats
    Short loop
    30 Ukraines
    Short loop
    30 Ukraines

    Back to flag for announcements and intentions.

  • King Kong’s Sweaty Bell Countdown: A Roaring Send-off to 2023! – from King Kong

    As the clock ticked down to the final moments of 2023, a fearless group of fitness enthusiasts gathered at the Audubon Zoo for the ultimate New Year’s Eve workout at 6:30 a.m. sharp…… except a few…..– and what a workout it was! Led by none other than the mighty King Kong, we decided to bid adieu to the year with a 23-rep extravaganza that left us questioning our sanity and laughing our way into 2024.

    We started by warming up those limbs with arm circles, side-straddle hops, halos, around the world, grass grabbers, self love (one your own…. a little redundant), imperial walkers, and hill billies. If our limbs had voices, they would have probably begged for mercy right then and there. But the real fun was just getting started.

    With the zoo as our witness, we moseyed to the stop sign and back, like a herd of fitness-fueled animals on the loose. The Audubon animals probably wondered if they’d been replaced by a new, more energetic species.

    Then came the kettlebell chaos! Curls, squats, little baby crunches (because even crunches need to be cute sometimes), side-straddle hops, reverse curls, alternating lunges – the list seemed endless. Just when we thought we’d mastered the art of swinging a kettlebell, King Kong threw in some unexpected moves like bell taps and sitting overhead presses. Our kettlebells must have been whispering, “What did we ever do to deserve this?”

    The cast of characters, including Jingle Vader, Stork, Strings, Douille, Almonaster, Willie, Subprime, and T-Bone, added their own flair to the festivities. The zoo animals probably joined in the laughter as we attempted manmakers, with King Kong himself leading the charge.

    As the final echoes of kettlebell clangs subsided and the side-straddle hops reached their 23rd glorious rendition, we realized that if we could survive King Kong’s Sweaty Bell Countdown, we could conquer anything the new year threw at us. We ended with the usual COT. We reminded ourselves that we never take our mental and physical health for granted. Here’s to laughter, sweat, and the absurdity of it all – may 2024 be as epic as our last beatdown of 2023!

    Thanks ChanGPT for this backblast.

  • Murph Prep Monday – from Landing Strip

    Twas a light showing this new year’s morning, with 6 brave souls showing up to start the year off right. One of my new year’s resolutions is to complete the Murph Challenge this Memorial Day. That’s a 1 mile run, 100 Pull-Ups, 200 Merkins and 300 Squats and another 1 mile run. This morning’s workout was the first of several to prepare the PAX for that.

    Warmup
    In-place: 20 SSHs, Self Love OYO and 20 Grass Grabbers.

    Tha Thang
    We then proceeded with a circuit of 5 Pull-Ups, 10 Merkins and 15 Squats, followed by a mosey down to the shelter and back. I got 8 full circuits in, plus 2 more partials (hanging for 10 seconds in lieu of Pull-Ups).

    Mary
    A round-robin of Penguins, Crunch Frogs, J-Los and Scissor Kicks.

    Shoutouts
    -Couch, for bringing 2 FNGs to this morning’s workout
    -Acorn and Hawk Talk, said FNGs, who along with Couch, rung in the new year at Tipitina’s last night and then posted this AM
    -JV, for actually completing the Pull-Up / Merkin / Squat components of the Murph on the first day of the year
    -Willie, for showing up (albeit a few minutes late)

    If anyone is reading this, I’d propose we start future holiday, or holiday adjacent workouts (e.g. day after Thanksgiving) at least 30 minutes later than usual.

    Happy new year people!

  • Misty Mountain – 12-16-2023 – from Almonaster

    12 Toys of Christmas!

    PAX:

    – Dax
    – Jingle Vader
    – Subprime
    – King Kong
    – Willie
    – Reluctant Yankee
    – Brown Bag
    – Tiny Tot
    – Douille
    – Gabby
    – Couch
    – Almonaster

    Mosey to the Tulane Breezeway.

    Warmup:
    SSH – 20 IC
    Arm Circles -10 IC
    Reverse Arm Circles – 10 IC
    Imperial Walkers – 10 IC
    The Morpheus – 10 IC
    Balance on 1 foot for 10 seconds – each
    Grass Grabbers – 10 IC
    Windmills – 10 IC
    Mountain Climbers – 10 IC

    The Thang:

    Santa has left presents all around for us to find.

    Mosey to the Pull-up Bars.

    12 seconds of pullups. Those not in Rotation will hold the Christmas Boat Pose.

    Mosey to the base of the mountain. Going up each level we will find 7 more toys.

    Slow Merkins – 12 IC
    Slow Leg Lifts – 12 IC
    Low Slow Squats – 12 IC
    Christmas Diamond Merkins – 12 IC
    Christmas Star Jumps – 12 IC
    Plank Elf Punches – 12 IC
    Santa’s Burpees – 12 OYO

    Mosey down the mountain to the benches.

    Slow Incline Merkins – 12 IC
    Dips – 12 IC
    Bench Step Downs – 6 each leg
    Decline Merkins – 12 IC

    Mary
    LBC’s – 20 IC
    Papa Noel Douiles – 20 IC

    Back to flag!
    Birthdays
    Anniversaries
    Announcements
    Intentions
    Thanks for the opportunity to lead!

  • Smurph Mountain Misogi part 2 – from Sandbar

    Same as before. Gather in groups of 4 of simliar speed – one to run for help and 2 to carry the body. Quick disclaimer. No Warmup. 5 mountains. 10 burpees at the bottom and top of each mountain. That’s a Century. Plus a mini- murph tucked into the middle with 25 pullups, 50 pushups, and 75 squats. Most everyone made it back by COT, but noone completed 5 mountains. The Rules of a Misogi (according to Michael Easter) are Rule 1: Make it really hard. Rule 2: Don’t die. Except for one pax spewing Martinelli’s, there were no casualties. But the Smurph Mountain Misogi remains a challenge.

  • KB swings…Maybe we did too many. – from Strings

    Determined to do 100 kettlebell swings, we did that and also some snatches, and cleans and walking lunges, and painfully slow burpees. I like to do at least 15 minutes of mobility and stretches before getting into the workout. Things seemed to speed along after the first 15. We did do 100 swings and the rest. But when I got to 915 mass I was sore for the rest of the day and next. Perhaps too many swings in one workout.

  • Brick by Brick, redux – from Sandbar

    WARM UP and Merkin-0-rama
    Mosey the parking lot to the truck to distribute 2 bricks per PAX. PAX moseyed across the street to the field in front of the zoo. 20 merks OYO. SSH IC, 10 merks OYO. 20 Grassgrabbers IC, 10 merks OYO. 20 Windmills. 10 merks OYO. 20 hillbillies IC. 10 merks OYO. 20 Imperial Walkers IC. 20 Merks OYO.
    THING 1 – BLIMPS (with Bricks) at the corners of field, 5-10-15 etc, 2 is 1.
    PAX then slow moseyed to the green wall outside the zoo, with curls on the way.
    THING 2 – Grab some Wall. Dodo Bird (With two bricks assume the People’s Chair, brick in each hand and at rest down your sides is the default position. In cadence Wonderbra (assume the People’s Chair position. Start with bricks close to body at chest level. Push bricks up over head fully extending arms, bring bricks back down to chest position, then push them straight out in front until complete arm extension reached. Return to starting position). 2 sets of 4 count 10 each. 10 count between. Then the PAX finished with some balls-to-the-wall decline merks, with elevation to the
    THING 2 – PAX paired up for CBGB (Carolina Drydocks, tricep extensions, Brick-flys, trap shrugs ), one PAX lifts while the other runs with the bricks up two lights and back and flapjack, until all PAX complete.
    Line up two rows for Indian run back to Oak Alley. Circle up for Mary – Angie led on 30 4 count LBCs. Then 35 4-count Freddy Mercurys. Then 40 4 count penguins, then LBOs. Finish with 10 more merks OYO.
    COT
    Back to the flag for countoff, name-o-rama, announcements and intentions.

  • Sweaty Bells – from Strings

    first 15 minutes mobility exercises and stretching, warmups. Kettblebell swings, Russian and American style; painfully slow burpees, snatches, shoulder press using 2 second concentric 3 second eccentric. Curls, halos, single arm rows, one lap. abs