F3 New Orleans

Tag: Smooth

  • Year in Review 2024: The Ghost of Backblast Past – from Paradox

    Whether you call it Twixmas, Feral Week, or the official week of the automated email , the window of December 25th-January 1 is a great period for quality family time , limited use of pants, and for ignoring nutritional facts. (Even if your Payday has 7g of protein).

    Naturally paired with this season is a look back on the good, bad and ugly of your previous year. And that’s where we’ll start as YHC also needs to issue this backblast as a mea culpa for several missed blasts through the year. Swept up in the undertow of work and diapers were more than a few half written works that just didn’t seem to have enough bowel movements in the day to finish.

    Of course I could pile the excuses higher than the pampers tower in YHCs garage but the burden remains and if the men of F3 thib have taught me anything then it’s how to get back up when the tubs of life truly starts thumping you down. Ergo, we must trudge forth! Like Pliny the Younger providing the only account of Vesuvius, who would tell ABs grandkids about the Christmas miracle ?
    Or like Aristodemus, spared from the final battle of Thermopylae to document those slain, someone must record the heroes of Danger Valve Mondays. Concordantly, this document is my 2024 last stand. To prevail against the waves of procrastination, flares of irritable bowels and all other reasons YHCs blasts went to Apple notes purgatory this year.

    Objectives for this beatdown/blast were ambitious. YHC needed to recognize a tremendous year from our pax and highlight a few glossed over diamonds in the tuff, and to do it all in one big greasy beatdown/blast omelette. You won’t even need mushrooms and salsa to stomach this egg vehicle Senor Mitchell. This behemoth is chocked full of the events, schisms, airport flatulence, franchises, hoosker do’s, hoosker don’ts , 17 different light rock alternatives, wearables, whistling kitty chasers and all of those secret sauces of 2024 F3 Thib that make this group of uncultured hooligans my valued brothers.

    Duke!!
    It’s the Year in Review !!
    Roll that beautiful footage pup.

    10 Tuesday Tuffians were mostly assembled as YHC arrived in a thicc gloom with near perfect beatdown weather. Cool enough for sans mosquitoes but not so chilly that a spray paint crop top would make you uncomfortable ya know, and YHC did know.

    Standard issue warmups with the ever growing detestable schism of slow knee heretics blatantly disregarding the call for “high knees” and instead doing the invasive species “slow high knees”. Like a useless pond grass the south port variant continues its spread, choking the life from more useful warms ups in our precious ecosystem. It’s a slippery slope to power walking fellas, it’s all I’m trying to say. Next it’s “there’s no jump on the burpee” then “Shakira shimmies” for merkins. Before long, once the estrogen levels get high enough, we’ll have a bear problem….(see anchorman et al 2004) …(and look this beatdown needed atleast one bah humbug or I couldn’t maintain the Dickens vibe ok)

    YHC persevered through the mutiny and Wet Tap reduced the tension by reminiscing of misspent youth in Lafayette night clubs. We put a Bumper Mosey bow on it and it was show time.

    YHC wanted to recap the year and one theme seemed recurrent and prominent in my reflections on 2024. Through the joys, sorrows, and everyday grind, in the ups and downs of family life , the sick 2.0s, the injuries , the beauty of new life and pain of lost loved ones. In all those things, God was, is and wants to be truly with us.

    YHC will now attempt to go full Jacob Marley as we fly through 2024 and see the beatdowns of past, present and future.

    In January God was with us in the known and unknown.

    On 1/7/24 Americas Best sparked a trivia revolution with his bd “everybody’s an expert”. YHC remembers running rich man’s loop as he asked us a deep question: “what is one category we know better than the rest”. YHC thought it was a prank and initially answered something like “statefair corndogs” only to realize the remaining pax all gave real heartfelt answers. Finally Cardinal, in his wisdom, suggested a chance I might know antibiotics. How thoughtful.
    When we returned to the stage AB weaponized our strengths (and Pride) against us to reinforce a very cool fact. We all kinda know 1-2 things really well but clearly there’s a vast ocean of facts out there we can humbly claim ignorance to and enjoy the process of learning.

    So to honor this amazing gift we unveiled …
    Rapid Fire AB trivia

    Correct – 7 coupon plank jacks
    Incorrect 7 coupon merks

    #1
    If yogurt and sweet potato had a baby they might produce ABs favorite traditional Polynesian food made from the Taro root.
    (Poi)

    Honeysuckle remembered the runny 3 finger poi as his favorite blend.

    #

    2ABs least favorite breakfast food- (omelette)

    Pope with the immediate answer.

    #3
    When AB first moved to Thibodaux his first job as an optometrist made him smell like fresh Tires. Where was that job? (Sam’s Club)

    Goose struggled with this one a bit but battled to produce Walmart which YHC awarded half credit. This is a great Goosian trait we see on display many beatdowns, if he doesn’t immediately have an answer then a rabid bloodhound is unleashed in his brain searching accurate guesses. Something’s very right with his medulla oblongata.

    #4
    AB has a dog named after the main character in this 1994 classic movie. (Shawshank redemption- Andy Dufrene)

    The group produced both Shawshank and Dufrene.

    Now it was only fair by the writ of habeas corpus that AB get a swing at the pax during his own trial so YHC prepped him the night before to bring a fast ball.

    The Pax produced some fine “Most common wrongs” but could not land on “Time Dilation” as the answer. Great teaser trailer for the 2025 Interstellar beatdown.

    Grand Finale

    On a special night during ABs childhood , in the room he shared with his brother Jeff , AB released flatus so vile that Jeff had to leave the room. When he returned the next morning somehow the smell had gotten much worse. This is event is now known as what?
    (The Christmas miracle)

    Again Goose was flexing his Dawkins trophy by guessing Napalm. Although it was incorrect, I hereby place it #2 on the list of potential FNG names. (Just behind Texaco Cat of course)

    Shoutout to This first hand account added by none other than Jeff Mitchell, who claims his smell never fully recovered.

    AB thank you for the gift of trivia this year. We are proud to call you our Llama Mama.

    In February God was with us on the run.

    2/17/24
    “It’s Only A Mile”

    We recognized two major memories from this awesome day and what is hoped to be a Thibodaux staple event.

    The first was Coach Goose. Anyone who ran more than a lap that day was aided by the one part field general/one part friend that provided stalwart support until the end.
    We also unknowingly picked up our Rookie of the Year, White Meat.

    Maybe it was the movie references or perhaps the pastalaya but he was there at the stage the following Monday rattling off Big Lebowski quotes like a pax veteran. We missed the mark on not naming this man Double Toilet but it’s been great getting to know the Meat and see him rapidly improve.

    Run lap- 10 Goosies
    Run Back 20 picklePounders

    Thank you Goose for your leadership and thank you White meat for courage to try something new.

    In March God was with us building our spiritual foundation brick by brick .

    3/21/24 Popeye VQ

    YHC would be flat out lying if I told you I wasn’t atleast a bit scared/concerned at what a Popeye Q might be. And based on the absolute silence of this usually chattering group during the beginning of the VQ some others were curious where the pain would come from as well. We stayed off his grass and all survived that day and ever since he has set the tone yielding his equally effective weapons of bricks and Yacht Rocks.

    YHC found a song that was Yacht Rockish and represented Pops previous solo brick routine.

    Coupon skips on our mystery song.

    “All by myself “ equals burpee

    One minute off per answer was the plan but these were fairly difficult and YHCs twang did not help a thorough explanation.

    Answers :

    – “ALL by myself “
    – Artist – Eric Carmen
    – other biggest hit song was “hungry eyes” featured in mutiple commercials to represent lusting after foods
    – What Band did he leave: The raspberries
    – Raspberry hit song was “Go all the away” – (hint: on guardians of galaxy soundtrack)

    Thank you Pop for the tough love and for the Sailing lessons.

    In April God was with us as we crank the intensity and carrying our burdens.

    Yankee Jeaux has a well established resume of mega holiday beatdowns that many broadway production companies would envy. Yet he continued to push the bar higher with this Holy Week Stations of the Cross bd. It had the perfect blend of physical demand, silent reflection and opportunity for unity in suffering.

    Thank you YJ, we secretly love your monologues.

    Rucking also exploded onto the F3 Thib scene in the spring of ‘24 so we honored the Co-founders of Warrior Wednesday -Smooth and Honeysuckle. ( and a Tidy Whitey shoutout). These pax showed Great initiative to start and maintain a change of pace on Wednesdays. The ruck/run allows for open conversations and a simple format. Just ask Smooth all you need is a Jansport and a few hammers.

    Both of these pax are connoisseurs of fine country so YHC dialed up ole King George.

    “Carrying your love with me”
    Coupon Step ups

    A classic Smooth “Okay” was the general sentiment regarding coupon step ups.

    Thank you HoneySuckle for your consistency, quality franchise Beatledowns and your God gifted infinity lungs

    Thank you Smooth for cutting edge Maul/tire beatdowns and for always embracing a heavy load with a laugh and an “okay”

    In May God was with us during a challenge.

    This May we had a few wrinkles added to the annual May challenge . Some fasting , mutiple extra point grab opportunities and 3am -6 am 10 mile ruck Ruck that launched 1000 wife complaint’s. It led to some awesomely weird conversations and some revelations about valves call schedule.

    To honor the super ruck and the Dawson 2.0s leading a Weird Al resurgence YHC found a little “YODA” .

    Coup Calf raise on song
    Curls on YODA

    Thanks to Ronnie for giving me a template to ask my M about a middle of the night ruck. (It didn’t help)

    In June God was with us to deal with transitions.

    This one needs little introduction.
    Mr Summerwind expressed all my feelings completely.

    Cardinal to MC
    “80 miles to Santa Fe”

    Parked – Squat
    Lake- Bonnie Blair
    Santa Fe – SSH

    We miss ya Cardinal.
    Beatdown field trip in 2025- it’s happening. Thanks for encouraging the deeper questions and being a rock in our community.

    In July God was with us to move heavy things.

    Wet Tap continued to carve his niche as our Pax premier expert in Coupons of unusual size (COUS). directly or indirectly introducing Black Betty and Tiny this year we learned to fear seeing the high country back into a lot with no cinders in sight.

    Song “Black Betty” by Ram Jam
    We did OHP on Black Betty and Bama Lam

    Thank you Tap, for seeing coupons everywhere you look.

    Mid Year Intermission Song:
    SSHs while YHC highlighted Lil Cuz’s innate ability to add valuable commentary on all things. Everyone sharpens iron in their own way and for Cuz it’s letting you know your beatdown monologue made him uncomfortable and that the veggie tray could use ranch.

    Thank you Cuz for Keeping the bar high. If your brothers aren’t first, your last. Some pax whispers about a 2025 Earl Dibbles bd?!

    In August, God was with us in the Danger.

    The character arc of Safety Valve from friendly neighbor to Monday Supervillain has been nothing short of amazing. To sum it up best I pulled the YELP reviews from the pax on Mondays after a standard valve bd:

    Popeye: Is Valve okay?

    White Meat: I’m hurting Linda.

    Goose: Does his insurance cover therapy? Asking for a friend.

    Pope: I feel a new sensation of being short of breath.

    Popeye: seriously, he ok?

    …it goes on like that for a few pages.

    To honor our much loved merkin maniac YHC called in some classic Kenny Loggins.
    Highway to the Danger Valve
    IW -Song
    Double Merkin Burpee on Danger Zone.

    Thanks for never letting off the gas Valveline.
    I like the way you hurt a man.

    In September God was with us to sharpen Iron.

    Remind me again, Whose idea was Iron PAX plus BK 500 in the same month?! We must have been really high on Jersey Mikes that day.

    As it happened, September 2024 at F3 Thibodaux was a minefield of some of the most difficult beatdowns we’ve ever attempted. It seems the brain trust up in Greenwood got together this year and decided there was a nationwide deficit in thrusters and burpees. This led to several snot woggle Saturdays where the legs were weakened but the shared suffering was stronger than ever.

    To cap off the month we pivoted our annual SV500 into a fall friendly event and this year supported the nonprofit Brothers Keeper. Goose kept tradition by building a ridiculous but well thought out 20 station course that was much more defensible against questionable form. Inch worm merkins and the station 1 Dora still keep pax in cold sweats.

    The dark horse team of Valve and Cardinal , now simply known as Second Collection, won the overall category and we’re still investigating that “anonymous” benefactor.

    Song:
    GreenDay
    “Wake me up when September Ends “

    On your 6 Hold coupon in press position.
    Alt between flutter kicks , heels to heaven , leg raises.
    WW3 sit-ups on “September”

    Thanks to all who made the BK500 a great success.

    In October/November God was with us to converge with our fellow brothers and to celebrate several milestones.
    Our Bayou pax of 4 years , Goose with a 5 year and the NOLA region hit the 10 year mark!

    These milestones could only be recognized by The GOOSELIZER. (As designed and led by Goose on the spot at Convergence)
    A deconstructed SSH montage with plank jacks in between. It’s a thing of synchronized beauty.

    Thanks to our NOLA brothers for continued support.

    And finally we adjusted our reverse time dilators as we arrived back at December safely at our cozy stage.

    December brings the season of Paxmas beatdowns as we prepare the way together. We had to adjust our Christmas carol expectations and even saw an exposed coca Cola Santa for the fraud he is. Chests and Butts were roasted on an open fire as ThighKowsky made a final bow. We saw a new grinch bring the Whoville pain and we were yearning for a YJ soliloquy. All this bringing us to an open field, a sky full of stars and vintage Goosing complete with 9000 pancakes plus a question :“Could we allow God to be bigger than us ?”

    Song : God is with Us
    Artist: For King and Country
    -Coupon High Knees
    -Thrusters on God is with Us

    The last counting and naming of 2024 then in another slightly less smelly miracle YHC gifted the Push-up Pimp to Valve.
    Great year of growth brother.

    Announcements
    -Get on Da Q Sheet
    -Feb 8 It’s only a Mile
    -White Mystery Meat Q (TBD)

    Prayers
    – winter illness’s
    – Holiday anxieties

    Thank you pax for these gifts and of the opportunity to lead and share together in all things that God provided in 2024.

    I’ll wrap us up with a little sprinkle of what Mr. Clive Staples had to say on this matter and as my own challenge for 2025.

    “I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.”

    I pray we can see all things in this new year with the Light He provides.

    God is with us.

    SYITG
    Dox

  • Mothership 2024-11-30 – from Catfish

    Conditions – Nice and chilly with a nice cool breeze, almost feels like Christmas!
    The Thang:
    Started with 10 OYO burpees, then a mosey to the peristyle for a warmup:
    SSH x 20 in cadence
    Imperial Squat Walkers x 20 in cadence
    8-Counts x 10 in cadence
    Peter Parker Peters x 20 in cadence
    Merkins x 20 (1 is 1) in cadence
    Took a bear-crawl half-lap around the peristyle, then switched to crawl-bear for the second half.
    Grabbed a column for a people’s chair, then did a short round of bat-wings holding the people’s chair (all exercised in cadence) – arm circles x 10, reverse arm circles x 10, overhead claps x 10, seal claps x 10, Moroccan night clubs x 10.
    Moseyed to the great lawn and partnered up for a round of BOMBS – 50 burpees, 100 overhead claps, 150 merkins, 200 big-boys, 250 squats.
    Moseyed over to the bench at the corner by the sculpture garden for alternating leg step ups (in cadence x 20) and Rocky Balboas (x 20 in cadence)
    Moseyed to the stairs on the west side of the museum for calf raises (x 20 in cadence), left leg side leg raises (x 10 in cadence) and right leg side leg raises (x 10 in cadence). Got on sixes for flutter kicks (x 20 in cadence), LBTs ( x 20 in cadence), and Dr. Ws (x 10 in cadence).
    Moseyed to Stonehenge by the entrance the sculpture garden for 8-counts (x 10 in cadence).
    Moseyed to the bandstand by Café du Monde for donkey kicks (x 10 in cadence).
    Back to flag, 5 OYO burpees to finish. COT. Coffee at the Bean Gallery because PJ’s on Canal still undergoing renovation.

  • You Can’t Ignore The H8! – from Hawgcycle

    You cannot ignore the H8! We tried. There was no H8! in April. Honestly, I forgot all about it. I guess I tried to push the H8! way down deep, but it never went away. The last few months have shown me that the H8! is always there. I can’t ignore it. I have to deal with it.

    The Thang:

    Each lap consists of running south to the top of the levee, crossing canal (bear crawling the neutral ground), running south to the bottom of the levee, cross canal and run north to the top of the levee, cross canal (bear crawling the neutral ground), running north down the levee and back across canal to the starting point. At the starting point, you do a descending burp and merk pyramid starting at 8 (burpee with 8 merkins, burpee with 7 merkins…burpee with 1 merkin)

    At the end of the 2nd lap the burp and merk pyramid starts at 7, etc.
    The goal is to complete 8 laps in 40 minutes. According to MapMyRun, each loop is approximately 0.4 miles. Therefore, to conquer the H8! you will have to do the following in 40 minutes:

    • Run over 3 Miles of Hills
    • 550 Yards of Bear Crawls
    • 36 Burpees
    • 120 Merkins

    We did AMRAP in 40 minutes.

    NMM

    • This was a full compliance hate – Strict 40 minute time limit, running on the sidewalk, no corner cutting, and bear crawling the entire length of the neutral ground.
    • We had 12 guys attempt the H8! Today. That’s a good turnout. T-claps to The Architect, High Rise, Mahatma, Mayhem, Pinewood, Mr. Rodgers, Rudy, Smooth, SOGO, Thighs, and Triple Shift for choosing to do hard things.
    • Was Mr. Rodgers brazen enough to attempt the H8! in a weighted vest?
    • A special shout out to High Rise and Mayhem for resisting the pull of the LVCC and their Temple of the Ole Man River. Members of the temple are devoted to a Chatbot they call Coach Greg. I was hoping a few more members would be willing to choose to battle the H8! Especially without their High Priestess Kuch and his Eunuch Glitter Balls in attendance. Unfortunately, the devotion of the following was too strong for them to waiver from the Supreme Chatbot’s commands. Bongo, El Guapo, Jesus Juice, Mama’s Pride, Saban, Sandberg, and Thumbwar sacrificed their manhood in sacred devotion to Coach Gregg this morning with a 45-minute easy run ritual.
    • Three completed all 8 laps today: Smooth, YHC, and The Architect.
    • Smooth went back out for lap 9 and was about 5 seconds short of finishing the running portion of the lap.
    • If you have ever helped with a Youth Run Nola event, you will know that the kids take off in a sprint when the gun goes off. They do not know the difference between a 100-meter dash and a 3-mile run. I’m guessing Pinewood is a YRN alum.
    • There were a few guys that finished the eight laps in just over 40 minutes. They are prime to get all eight in April.
    • Speaking of April, we now have 6 months to prepare. Let’s keep pushing each other to stay disciplined and continue accelerating.

  • 10 Years and 1 Day Later – from Reluctant Yankee

    Re-enactment of the first ever official F3 Nola workout

    The Thang:

    Gandalf’s Q (played by Hawgcycle)

    Mosey to a space near the football field, backwards run, side-shuffle left, side-shuffle right
    Circle of Pain (COP):
    Side-Straddle Hops in cadence x15
    Merkins in cadence x12
    Imperial Walkers in cadence x15
    Mountain Climbers in cadence x20
    Slow Squats in cadence x10
    Wide-Arm Merkins in cadence x10
    Diamond Merkins in cadence x10
    Mosey to bridge
    11s across the bridge with burpees on far side and jump squats on near side #crowdpleaser
    Plank-O-Rama: Regular, Elbows, Left Hand/Leg High, Right Hand/Leg High, Mission Impossible (10 count from Fracsac)

    Reluctant Yankee’s Q (Played by Triple Shift)

    Mosey back to track
    6 Minutes of Mary:
    LBCs in cadence x10
    Hello Dollys in cadence x10
    High Dollys (Rosalitas) in cadence x10
    Bicycles (Freddy Mercury) in cadence x10
    Dying Cockroach in cadence x10
    Flutter Kicks in cadence
    Quick mosey one full lap around the track

    Chong Li’s Q (Played by Reluctant Yankee)

    Loooooong mosey to picnic tables under the bridge
    Chong Li Special:
    Decline Merkins in cadence x16
    Right Leg Squat in cadence x8
    Incline Merkins in cadence x16
    Left Leg Squat in cadence x8
    Decline Merkins IC x12
    Right Leg Squat IC x6
    Incline Merkins IC x12
    Left Leg Squat IC x6
    Decline Merkins IC x8
    Right Leg Squat IC x4
    Incline Merkins IC x8
    Left Leg Squat IC x4
    Decline Merkins IC x4
    Right Leg Squat IC x2
    Incline Merkins IC x4
    Left Leg Squat IC x2
    Mosey back to the track
    Two Rounds With Tyson happened in original beatdown, but ran out of time. Yankee gave Fracsac the Q for last minute, so it was 10 burpees for the 10 years of F3 Nola!
    Mosey back to shovel flag
    Circle of Trust (COT)

    NMM

    This beatdown was held 10 years and 1 day after the original launch. T-Claps to all who kept this great thing going!

    Not sure how they squeezed in 2 rounds of Tysons on that first day. The OGs were 10 years and 1 day older, so…..

    4 OGs were present- Hawgcycle, Reluctant Yankee, Triple Shift, and Redfish

  • Football and Frisbee Chaos – from Fracsac

    No Q signed up late Friday, so YHC stepped up and made the commitment.

    10 other Pax joined bringing the total to 11.

    Warmup at the peristyle with normal stuff.

    Great Lawn has vendors setting up, so mosey to field near NOMA. Set up cones to form a field with 2 end zones. Split up pax and for 4 teams. 2 teams playing football and 2 playing ultimate frisbee on the same field. Change up games midway so everyone gets a dose of both. Total chaos.

    Mosey behind Cafe du Monde for some Dora. There was something to do with running with football and frisbee which YHCs team won.

    Mosey to flag for CoT followed by coffeteria

    NMM

    Knucklehead was wearing so much bling he didn’t notice a pendant coming off. We used the last 5 minutes scouring the football/frisbee field looking for it to no avail.

    YHC tried something new, the pax were receptive, and everyone got a good workout and had some fun.

    Sign up to Q and just go for it.

    SYITG

  • Earned Coffeeteria on National Coffee Day – from Hokie

    10 Pax gathered at NOMA to earn coffeeteria rights on National Coffee Day

    Because YHC was the Q, you know the workout would be very simplistic.

    After disclaimer, Warm-o-rama consisted of
    Roll head clockwise
    Roll head counterclockwise
    Shoulder shrugs forward
    Shoulder shrugs backwards
    Arm circles forward
    Arm circles backwards
    Slow Vigodas
    Ankle turns
    Self love

    The Thang —

    10 Honest Merkins – Lunge across NOMA – 100 of *Exercise* – Lap NOMA

    *Exercise* changed each Round
    1. Step ups
    2. calf raises
    3. deep squats
    4. big boy sit ups

    After a Pax finished their lap of NOMA the returned to fountain area to do step ups while waiting on the six, at which point the Q started his timer for just 2 more minutes of step ups

  • Three’s a Party! – from Squints

    Warmup:
    Lap around the Sculpture
    SSH (Side Straddle Hops) x 20
    Slow Abe Vigoda x 11
    Grass Grabbers x 10
    Side Steps
    Arm Circles (Forward) x 10
    Arm Circles (Reverse) x 10
    Seal Claps x 10
    Moroccan Night Clubs x 10

    Main Workout (30-second sets, 4 rounds):
    Round 1: Curls, Dips, Y’s, Farmer’s Carry
    Round 2: WW3 Sit-Ups, Rows, Burpees (with block), Gas Pumpers
    Round 3: Man Maker Merkins, Reverse Snow Angels, Skull Crushers, Heavy Squats

    Quick Round:
    Rotator Cuff Exercises
    Side Planks (both sides)
    Heavy Freddy Mercury’s

    COT:
    Countarama
    Namarama
    Announcements
    Intentions
    Prayer

  • It’s only 10 rounds with Hokie – from Hokie

    YHC has been less than consistent in attending F3, as is obvious to all, and is subject to criticism for FartSacking and having the audacity to attend coffee or book studies without earning his attendance priviledges.

    Nonetheless, Catfish asked me one Saturday or Sunday about a month prior if I could muster the energy to commit to Q and I accepted his challenge.

    After a brief disclaimer at the flag, we moseyed while lifting knees to chest over to the pavilion for Warm-o-rama including Slow Vigodas, grass grabbers and arm circles.

    The Thang… in my mind it would only be 10 rounds by the great lawn with 5 burpees at each of the four corners and our mode of transportation between corners would be backwards mosey on long stretch by parking lot, lunges by Storyland, forward mosey by City Putt and an exercise at the end of fourth corner changing round by round. Keeping with the concept of leave no man behind, instructions were only given out one round at a time and those who finished first could plank and shoulder tap waiting on the six to start the next round.

    Round 1 ~ 100 Honest Merkins … obviously a crowd favorite 😉
    Round 2 ~ it gets easier ~ only 90 step ups and even easier yet one is one
    Round 3 ~ getting even easier ~ only 80 Big Boi Sit Ups
    Round 4 ~ 70 Bobby Hurley’s
    Round 5 ~ 60 star toe taps

    Obviously, YHC’s lack of consistent attendance slowed down the Pax as we were only able to complete 5 of the 10 rounds.

    Thanks to Catfish for giving me the opportunity to lead and wishing each of you the very best. See ya when I can get my butt outta bed.

  • Neuron Expanding Recreational Fun – from Paradox

    YHC has always been fascinated by what the human body can do under extreme pressure. YHC recently listened to a podcast interview of Cole Hocker, and he described basically blacking out on the last leg of his crazy gold medal 1500m finish. WILD right? But it got me to thanking. What could our “slightly less than gold medal track athlete” pax perform when given the right pressure.

    Early this year, AB introduced a paradigm shifting beatdown based on the fact that everyone knows an unhealthy amount of information about at least 1 or 2 topics. Sometimes, ashamedly so. It hooked several pax into the Learned Llama multiverse you see today plus introduced a new wrinkle to an already strong group of exercise/trivia pioneers. YHC has been tinkering with alternate versions of it since and below is the result.

    So here’s how the game works.
    YHC names an exercise for each round then Pax will Hold Al Gore around an ominous coupon pile.

    YHC will then name a list of words one by one with a few seconds in between for thanking.

    Your goal is to name the common factor of the list as fast as possible.
    You will get one shot per pax , if you are incorrect you will start SSH (later ti be converted to burps) until the round is over.
    If correct then we will stop on that round and do the corresponding reps (after 1 -10 reps , 2-20 etc)

    Example

    Brown (10) ….Black(20) …paddington (30) Polar (40) … Grizzly (50) … all bears and you have an increasing chance at getting the correct association but as options increase so do the reps.

    Duke!
    Glove up, summers over and we got some iron to sharpen!

    Standard warmup with that big Pax energy when several cars roll up at once that makes YHC all warm and fuzzy inside.

    We started where the Bible begins and most friendships end…with the members of Genesis.

    1.) Tony Banks
    2.) Mike Rutherford
    3.) Phil Collins
    4.) Peter Gabriel

    Early guesses at drummers but we went 30 Reps and there were grumbles that sounded an a lot like Sussidio.

    National Parks (Star Jumps)
    1. Teddy Roosevelt
    2. Glacier
    3. Arches
    4. Grand Canyon
    5. Yosemite

    AB flashing his generational trivia talent and we took 20 reps.

    Army Bases w “Fort” at the beginning (HR Merkins)

    1.) Campbell
    2.) Carson
    3.) Detrick
    4.) Bragg
    5.) Hood

    Had this loaded for Pop and he didn’t dissapoint with the early answer for 20 reps.

    Speed Skaters (Bonnie Blair’s )
    1.) johan olav Koss
    2.) Eric Heiden
    3.) JR Celski
    4.) Apollo Ohno
    5.) Bonnie Blair

    This one went deep for 40

    Pokémon (Coupon Curls )

    1.) Spearow
    2.) Pidgey
    3.) Weedle
    4.) Charizard
    5.) Pikachu

    Lil Cuz with the performance of the day. He blamed his 2.0 toy pile but we all know he’s got dat Arcanine in him.

    Satellites (Goblet Squats )
    1.) Terra
    2.) Aqua
    3.) LandSat8
    4.) Explorer 1
    5.) Sputnik

    40 Reps
    Not a peep from our resident beekeeper.
    The man just likes others to improve I guess.

    GI Joe (Ranger Merkins)
    1.) Roadblock
    2.) Shipwreck
    3.) Zartan
    4.) Duke
    5.) Snake Eyes

    30 reps
    Knowing is half the battle.
    Ranger Merkins are the rest.

    Members of *NSYNC (Apollo Ohnos)
    1.) Chris
    2.) Joey
    3.) JC
    4.) Lance
    5.) Justin

    TANA!!!!
    From the rafters the Peoples Rep saved the pax from atleast 20 extra Ohnos until we got to JT.

    Vice Presidents (box jumps)
    1.) James S Sherman
    2.) Levi P Morton
    3.) elbridge Gerry
    4.) John C Calhoun
    5.) dick Cheney

    40 box jumps were contended by pope who reported a whispered correct answer so we split the difference and did 25. Complex numbers are my thing.

    Triple Crown Winners (Carolina Dry Dox)

    1.) Omaha
    2.) Gallant Fox
    3.) Seattle Slew
    4.) American Pharoah
    5.) Secretariat

    30 Reps as Maneater started to heat up.

    CMM (Thrusters)
    1.) Birdman
    2.) Turk
    3.) BG
    4.) Manny Fresh
    5.) Lil Wayne

    Maneater again
    He’s On Fire!

    Heisman trophy winners ( Merkins )
    1.) Jay Berwanger
    2.) Billy Sims
    3.) Steve Spurrier
    4.) Desmond Howard
    5.) Tim Tebow

    A few chuckles at Wanger but then HS got down to business and ID’d spurrier as a champion.
    30 reps.

    Bankrupt Companies
    (Decline Merkins)

    1.) pacific gas and electric company
    2.) Washington mutual
    3.) Silicon Valley Bank
    4.) Lehman brothers
    5.) Enron

    30 reps as mutiple pax supplied this one.

    DDay Beaches – WW3 sit-ups

    1.) Sword
    2.) Gold
    3.) Juno
    4.) Utah
    5.) Omaha

    Pope/Pop are a force of military history to be reckoned with.

    Van Gohg paintings (Thrusters)
    1.) The potato eaters
    2.) almond blossoms
    3.) cafe terrace at night
    4.) self portrait w bandaged ear
    5.) starry night

    40 Reps to finish us out but these larks were saved by the bell.

    COT and Prayer intentions
    HS prayed us out

    Amazing seeing the collective pax mind under pressure. The hidden talents of this group never cease to amaze YHC.

    Thanks for the privilege to lead.

    -A Dox of Chocolates

    Imagine you are one of 86 billion brain cells. All with important tasks for sending and receiving messages at 100 meters/second. The capability to solve complex formulas, write ballads , or serve your fellow man awaits at a moments notice. Butttt instead you only get one assignment. Just once in 40 years you will be asked to associate the memory of two random NSYNC band members and It will save many men from coupon thruster destruction.

    “Bye, bye, bye” you whisper when the job is complete, then you return to brain cell retirement singing Kokomo at random intervals.

    No Neuron left behind.
    But leave no Neuron where you found him.

    SYITG
    Dox

  • Life to the MAX – from Paradox

    Facts only:

    It would be super duper to have an FNG visit from Poland.

    And if that FNG posted every day on his vacation, pretty Rad as well.

    Could we name him after a nerd scientist with big BIG ideas .
    For certain.

    But What if I told you (switch to Morpheus voice )
    What If I told you, that an FNG from Poland closely connected to one of our own posted all week long through ridiculous IPC preps with a huge smile on his face ?

    And I hope now that you are nice and lathered up and your Garmin is recording …because what if one of those same days was actually a feast day for one of the greatest Polish Saints in history ?!

    These were the facts in Aug 15 2024 and 10 pax were present at the Den to share the labor.

    Grab that red pill and come on in!

    Duke! Get the Coups
    It’s IPC prepppp

    FACTS:
    St Max Kolbe was a Catholic polish priest who lived from 1894 to 1941.
    Known as the Saint of Aushwitz
    He died on August 14 1941 volunteering to exchange his life for another prisoner.

    Those are the facts for this beatdown men.
    I’ll spare the usual dox fluff (just this once) and encourage you to dig more on this Saints incredible life of sacrifice.

    Each round :
    Reps : 10, 9, 8 …etc to 1
    MOT in between varies

    We kept it simple
    Each round for a rule of life for St Kolbe.

    1. Devotion to our lady at an early age

    Purity – no cheat merkins
    MOT bearcrawl

    2.) Take care of your body in order for our body’s to better be able to glorify and serve God and others.

    **As a Friar- he founded one of the largest Franciscan orders of his age
    Devoted to exercise he was diligent about starting the day with mutiple rounds of jumping jacks. Seems like a man who loved SSHs and being in time. YHC wishes he had more neighbors like this …

    SSH and Karaoke

    3.) Worked hard to spread the gospel by all means necessary
    Radio, magazine , theater etc

    Coupon Squats and coupon Lunges

    All of a sudden you could hear every cricket at the Den

    4.) We need strong men trained in the faith.
    Militia Immaculate
    Rifle Carry and Overhead Press

    5.) We have a mission to Carry Faith Abroad-
    Setup community in Nagasaki
    Burpees and Broad Jumps

    6.) Growth toward Ultimate Sacrifice

    53 merkins for 53 years that Franciszek Gawoniczek lived after St Kolbe gave up his life for him.

    COT and tremendous gratitude to Copernicus for showing up all week. Thank you for sharing your story and the suffering with us. We hope you made it through customs with all that F3 swag.

    St Kolbe , pray for us !

    SYITG
    Dox