F3 New Orleans

Category: New Orleans

  • Takin’ it to Das Streets – from America’s Best

    Sometime back in February, “the algorithm” presented to YHC a video of Klootschiten, a wintertime Dutch road-bowling game that includes pulling along a liquor wagon. It’s a team sport, with rules similar to golf, and the course is a series of roads. So, in the spirit of “everything is a beatdown,” it seemed like a good way to get some running in for a Tuesday during RCR… but the full Q sheet pushed it into March. Instead of a wagon, one team member would haul a coupon. And before each throw, the team would do the number of burpees corresponding to which number throw they are on. The man with the coupon would do 2x curls instead.

    On Kloot-day, however, YHC’s back was tweaked, so I opted to alternate Goosies on the even numbers. And when you get to throw number 20… no, 10, you start over at one again. You know what, let’s make it 20.

    But first, Goose requested trivia. And we had a downranger MerMan to impress…
    So, what are the 3 main countries who participate in this sport?
    YHC pronounced “Klootschiten” with the hardest, most severe German accent I could force. Of course, Goose’s first guess was “Ireland.” Which was correct.
    Yankee Jeaux obviously knew the answer, but apparently all he heard was a challenge, and could only chatter back a seemingly unending string of Germanic jibberish.
    Still, after 5 penalty burpees, YHC counted that as a correct answer.
    Montana rounded out the correct answers with The Netherlands. The man was burned by those Aldi cookies, and now knows that things inspired by Germany may actually be Dutch.

    Teams were formed and off we went. Team Goose-Dox-Merman cleverly threw their kloot under the dumpster early, so they could not hear (ignore) an important rules change that would undoubtedly change the course of Kloot history forever.
    Sometimes you get a feeling that Goose is going to beat you, but what can you do? I’ll tell you what you can do—you don’t just roll over and let it happen. No, what you do is you make the rules ambiguous enough, or you change them enough times that Goose accidentally cheats.
    And so the righteous teams did probably like 3 times more burpees and Goosies and curls, but Team Green was gracious enough to come back and pick up the losers.
    While two teams were still hammering away on the course, the other team was hanging out at the flag. YHC had a contingency plan. A reverse Dora was written on a cardboard box. 400 Imperial Walkers (MOT Fox Holes), 200 curls (MOT lunge walk), 100 WJs (MOT mosey). Team Yankee Popeye Pope was instructed to begin.
    But there was too much confusion about whether a backwards Dora could actually exist, or if there was some new reading style in which you read the bottom-to-top. The schism resulted in Popeye Imperial Walking Alone. (For the record, there is no language on Earth read bottom to top).

    YHC’s team limped into last place with time enough for a quick YJ favorite. With Lent nigh, it was time to “Give it Up.” YHC had spent an inadvisable amount of time selecting the right remix… but ultimately found one in which there are somewhere between 40 and 50 triggers, 75% of which occur in the last 30 seconds. So we held plank, merkined on each “give it up,” and mountain-climbed during any musical interludes. While most of the PAX were groaning, Yankee Joe was grinning, and at least once I swear I heard him mutter “my precious.” There has since been wild speculation of a YJ 45-minute “Give it Up Remix” BD.

    All that was left was a few minutes of Mary, primarily to answer the burning question “What does WJ stand for?!?!”

    COT
    Push up Pimp was transferred sub rosa from White Meat to Pope
    Goose prayed us out

    Always an honor to lead you men.
    SYITG,
    AB

  • Afternoon Delight – 3-5-2025 – from Almonaster

    We heard the Penguins were flying to the North Pole and decided to lay down on the banks of the Audubon Lagoons.

    The PAX were motivated to perform some Nickles and Dimes. 50 Penguins or Core exercise and 10 merkins, shoulder taps, or squats at each 3rd running man. We finished with Penguin Ring of Fire!!

    Subprime, Strings, Voila, Couch, Big Willie, Blowout, SOGO, and Almonaster

  • Takin’ it to the Streets – from America’s Best

    Sometime back in February, “the algorithm” presented to YHC a video of Klootschiten, a wintertime Dutch road-bowling game that includes pulling along a liquor wagon. It’s a team sport, with rules similar to golf, and the course is a series of roads. So, in the spirit of “everything is a beatdown,” it seemed like a good way to get some running in for a Tuesday during RCR… unfortunately the full Q sheet pushed it into March. Instead of a wagon, one team member would haul a coupon. And before each throw, the team would do the number of burpees corresponding to which number throw they are on. The man with the coupon would do 2x curls instead.

    On Kloot-day, however, YHC’s back was tweaked, so I opted to alternate Goosies on the even numbers. And when you get to throw number 20… no, 10, you start over at one again. You know what, let’s make it 20.

    But first, Goose requested trivia. And we needed to show downranger MerMan what we are all about? So, what are the 3 main countries who participate in this sport?

    YHC pronounced “Klootschiten” with the hardest, most severe German accent I could force. Of course, Goose’s first guess was “Ireland.” Which was correct.
    Yankee Jeaux obviously knew the answer, but apparently all he heard was a challenge, and could only chatter back a seemingly unending string of Germanic jibberish.
    Still, after 5 penalty burpees, YHC counted that as a correct answer.
    Montana rounded out the correct answers with The Netherlands. The man was burned by those Aldi cookies, and now knows that things inspired by Germany may actually be Dutch.

    Teams were formed and off we went. Team Goose-Dox-Merman cleverly threw their kloot under the dumpster early, so they could not hear (ignore) an important rules change that would undoubtedly change the course of Kloot history forever.
    Sometimes you get a feeling that Goose is going to beat you, but what can you do? I’ll tell you what you can do—you don’t just roll over and let it happen. No, what you do is you make the rules ambiguous enough, or you change them enough times that Goose accidentally cheats.
    And so the righteous teams did probably like 3 times more burpees and Goosies and curls, but Team Green was gracious enough to come back and pick up the losers.
    While two teams were still hammering away on the course, the other team was hanging out at the flag. YHC had a contingency plan. A reverse Dora was written on a cardboard box. 400 Imperial Walkers (MOT Fox Holes), 200 curls(MOT lunge walk), 100 WJ(Wheezy Jeffersons) (MOT mosey). Team Yankee Popeye Pope was instructed to begin.
    But there was too much confusion about whether a backwards Dora could actually exist, or if there was some new reading style in which you read the bottom-to-top. The schism left Popeye Imperial Walking alone. (For the record, there is no language on Earth read bottom to top).
    YHC’s team limped into last place with time enough for a quick YJ favorite. With Lent nigh, it was time to “Give it Up.” YHC had spent an inadvisable amount of time selecting the right remix… but found one in which there are somewhere between 40 and 50 triggers, 75% of which occur in the last 30 seconds. So held plank and merkined on each “Give it Up,” mountain climbing during any instrumental breaks. While most of the PAX were groaning, Yankee Joe was grinning, and at least once I swear I hear him mutter “my precious.” There since has been wild speculation of a YJ 45-minute “Give it Up Remix” BD.
    All that was left was a few minutes of Mary, primarily to answer the burning question “what does WJ stand for?!?!”

    COT
    WM conveyed Push up Pimp sub rosa to Pope
    Goose prayed us out

    Thanks men, always an honor to lead.
    SYITG,
    AB

  • Takin’ it to the Streets – from America’s Best

    Sometime back in February, “the algorithm” presented to YHC a video of Klootschiten, a wintertime Dutch road-bowling game that includes pulling along a liquor wagon. It’s a team sport, with rules similar to golf, and the course is a series of roads. So, in the spirit of “everything is a beatdown,” it seemed like a good way to get some running in for a Tuesday during RCR… unfortunately the full Q sheet pushed it into March. Instead of a wagon, one team member would haul a coupon. And before each throw, the team would do the number of burpees corresponding to which number throw they are on. The man with the coupon would do 2x curls instead.

    On Kloot-day, however, YHC’s back was tweaked, so I opted to alternate Goosies on the even numbers. And when you get to throw number 20… no, 10, you start over at one again. You know what, let’s make it 20.

    But first, Goose requested trivia. And we needed to show downranger MerMan what we are all about? So, what are the 3 main countries who participate in this sport?

    YHC pronounced “Klootschiten” with the hardest, most severe German accent I could force. Of course, Goose’s first guess was “Ireland.” Which was correct.
    Yankee Jeaux obviously knew the answer, but apparently all he heard was a challenge, and could only chatter back a seemingly unending string of Germanic jibberish.
    Still, after 5 penalty burpees, YHC counted that as a correct answer.
    Montana rounded out the correct answers with The Netherlands. The man was burned by those Aldi cookies, and now knows that things inspired by Germany may actually be Dutch.

    Teams were formed and off we went. Team Goose-Dox-Merman cleverly threw their kloot under the dumpster early, so they could not hear (ignore) an important rules change that would undoubtedly change the course of Kloot history forever.
    Sometimes you get a feeling that Goose is going to beat you, but what can you do? I’ll tell you what you can do—you don’t just roll over and let it happen. No, what you do is you make the rules ambiguous enough, or you change them enough times that Goose accidentally cheats.
    And so the righteous teams did probably like 3 times more burpees and Goosies and curls, but Team Green was gracious enough to come back and pick up the losers.
    While two teams were still hammering away on the course, the other team was hanging out at the flag. YHC had a contingency plan. A reverse Dora was written on a cardboard box. 400 Imperial Walkers (MOT Fox Holes), 200 curls(MOT lunge walk), 100 WJ(Wheezy Jeffersons) (MOT mosey). Team Yankee Popeye Pope was instructed to begin.
    But there was too much confusion about whether a backwards Dora could actually exist, or if there was some new reading style in which you read the bottom-to-top. The schism left Popeye Imperial Walking alone. (For the record, there is no language on Earth read bottom to top).
    YHC’s team limped into last place with time enough for a quick YJ favorite. With Lent nigh, it was time to “Give it Up.” YHC had spent an inadvisable amount of time selecting the right remix… but found one in which there are somewhere between 40 and 50 triggers, 75% of which occur in the last 30 seconds. So held plank and merkined on each “Give it Up,” mountain climbing during any instrumental breaks. While most of the PAX were groaning, Yankee Joe was grinning, and at least once I swear I hear him mutter “my precious.” There since has been wild speculation of a YJ 45-minute “Give it Up Remix” BD.
    All that was left was a few minutes of Mary, primarily to answer the burning question “what does WJ stand for?!?!”

    COT
    WM conveyed Push up Pimp sub rosa to Pope
    Goose prayed us out

    Thanks men, always an honor to lead.
    SYITG,
    AB

  • Bolti Gras, as in “Fat Bolt” – from Bolt

    YHC dared both a weigh in and the tape measure after work travel/boozing for 7 out of 8 weeks and thus my Lundi Gras was decided…but only bc Boo-Boo called for accountability in Slack! Had he not done so, the tweaked knee and plantar fasciitis would have been all the excuses needed to fartsack so to hedge against it, the response in Slack was affirm attendance and raise by way of taking the Q!
    Warmorama with intent to only feature Mardi Gras playlist until KB made a comment about the “diarrhea song” which required compliance to the pax wishes! Abe SLOWgodas, IW, GG, SSH, seal/OH claps, both Tie Fighters, Chinooks, MNC, self love followed by a slowsey to JPAX where the pax voted horizontal or vertical. Boo-boo and KB had 2-1 advantage so vertical meant the timer would run up the stairs and bear crawl down the ramp. The Dora was 100 dry docks, 200 reverse lunges 2:1, and 300 BBSU. Return to the flag for a song skip and 3 burpee penalty followed by an introduction to YHC’s 30-count invention: Shoulders, Knees, and Toes Plank as time ran out. COT, grateful for the men today and F3 everyday.

  • Burn it Out Like We Used to Do – from Goose

    YHC has greatly admired the incredible creativity that this Thibodaux PAX has continued to bring to the table week after week. The bar is set high, and it’s clear this crew is willing to put in solid prep work out of appreciation for their companions in the gloom. It’s unmatched by any other region YHC where has posted.

    However, this morning, YHC felt the need to focus on a few particular areas that need shoring up and decided to dial up a few classic burners to do the trick. Sometimes you gotta bring the bar down a little bit, you know? I mean, we can’t have guys posting in other places where they just pull routines from the Exicon and wonder why there aren’t any trivia questions, hidden cones, costumes, monologues, or Coupons of Unusual Size. We’ve got to know how to fit in a little bit.

    So, after a hefty warmup of the old faithfuls (this was day 1 of waking up without a painful memory of Thursday), we lined up for a fast-paced set of 11’s. Curls at one end, Big Boy Situps at the other, and carioca and side shuffles to get back and forth through the grass. (Our shoes and socks had been missing the moisture–you can’t let those get too dried out.)

    With the 30 min or so remaining, YHC blew the dust of the Deck-o-Death and explained that we’d be doing the classic D-o-D routine, which consists of an exercise assigned to each suit and the number of the card indicating the reps. No poker or battle or anything, we’d just take turns pulling the top card and completing the assigned exercises as follows:
    -Diamonds = tricep presses
    -Clubs = goblet squats
    -Hearts = coupon flutter kicks
    -Spades = manmakers
    -Aces = 50 Rocky Balboas on the curb (2:1)
    -Jokers = 20 coupon jump-overs (2:1)

    You have to have at least one exercise in the routine to make you dread that suit and add some drama as well as a healthy sprinkling of some tougher stuff. This morning, however, the drama turned into tragedy. Despite the deck having never been used for any actual card games, you’d have thought YHC’s kids had used it recently to play “Spades, Spades, and More Spades”. So, the weak attempt at shuffling did little to stem the unending tide of manmakers that washed over the PAX. It was punctuated every now and then by Rocky Balboas, which gave the PAX a chance to River Dance their pain away, but somehow the spades multiplied while we were at the curb. There was no official count, but AB is pretty sure there were at least three Queens and seven 7’s of spades drawn. Things were getting dangerous. The spades seemed to be gaining intelligence as they multiplied. Thankfully, they lost their power once the clock registered 6:00am and we sealed them away in a sandwich bag.

    COT and Maneater revealed the newest embarrassing wearable, Proper Twelve. It’s a crop top with an whiskey brand on it that he caught at a parade. Not sure who was wearing it before it was thrown, but it was awarded to Smooth, who hopes he can comply with the HOA policy which requires that shirts must cover the nips while using shared facilities.

    AB prayed us out, and we shared our gratitude that he’ll be Q-ing tomorrow, which reduces the likelihood of manmakers substantially.

    SYITG,
    Goose

  • 2/27/25 Planet Fitness Death March – from Smooth Operator

    2/27/25 Planet Fitness Death March
    XL
    Pipelayer
    Pope
    Goose
    Safet Valve
    Lil Cuz
    ManEater
    Americas Best
    Yankee Joe

    Nothing like a lil death march to get us into the month of March, and an end to Run Cajun Run by doing a little pole to pole shuffling.
    YHC showed up a little later than normal from a night shift due to late morning shift change. Goose had already started his warm-up lap and Pope and Maneater were discussing ways to save Pope’s generation from world-wide catastrophes like man eating lion’s and tigers and dead eyed corporation gym members and such.  
    As others showed up, one individual stood out. He did not know it, but Lil Cuz was instrumental in the creation of this beatdown. He once told me of a gym where “normal” people could go and walk on tread mills and do exercise machines and other foreign “equipment” without fear of being intimidated by individuals who grunted a little too much or occasionally dropped a heavy object or two. He even said there was a buzzer type light that was in place to shame these Neanderthalic clumsy individuals. And as I stored this seemingly useless but hilarious information into my hard drive, YHC vowed to use this information for the good of humanity.  

    Warmarama  
    As we huddled around the handicap sign due to a lack of lion statue that YHC will never get over. 0515 hit and YHC and Pope ran to the flag to begin Side straddle hops while others filtered in from the sign using the non-orderly fashion method. After this warmarama went as normal with YHC forgetting his numbers occasionally.

    Exercises were:
    SSH
    Imperial Walkers
    Mountain Climbers
    Tie Fighters both front and back  

    Thang 1  
    Planet Fitness Death March

    Thang 1 began with what seemed to be the start of some Canal street burpees, but YHC kept moseying into the abyss located between Live Mais and I’m Loving It. The PAX continued to the TJ Maxx end of Plaza Del Rienzi Shopping Center, and we stopped for YHC to explain the rules for our little there and back again march. The rules are as follows: Each skinny post the PAX will complete 2 goosees, thank you Goose for the demonstration. Each fat post will be 10 merkins and the PAX will bear crawl to the next post. For each 90 degrees turn in our alley way the Pax will complete 10 burpees. Mode of transport would be a mosey Ish sprint. At this point the PAX moseyed to the far end of our brightly lit alley way. We stopped near Bourgeois Insurance Shop and as the PAX attempted to ask further question YHC gave the ready set go and off the PAX went. YHC learned quickly that the PAX is up for any challenge. They started out the gate moving fast and never let up even when we reached the Planet Fitness area where we received a couple dead eyed stares and even probably got posted on Snapchat by one of the employees. You could have sworn that the PAX had painted red hands on their shorts and were carrying protest signs by the looks we received. The PAX kept at it and finished long before YHC expected. When Valve came to pick up the 6 (ME) he was adamant he would not be going back to our starting point near Bourgeois Insurance. Therefore, YHC decided in a bout of leniency to do a Rapid-Fire Death March. The Rules are the same except there would be no bear crawling and all number of reps would be 1. The PAX completed this in record time and before you know it, the PAX was on the move again in the direction of Small’s parking lot.

    Thang 2  
    Making it up as YHC goes

    We reached Small’s and YHC decided it was time for what everyone was there for anal street burpees. We did a couple and AB (the voice of reason) decided that tiny asphalt rocks and glass was not the place to be burpee ing. It seems like this wasn’t AB cup of frothy coffee, therefore the PAX headed back to the flag with 12 minutes to go. As we reached the flag YHC decided we would do a couple rounds of Mary. It started with a plead to move to concrete instead of the wet grass which YHC graciously approved. The round of Mary started with WWI sit ups, followed by Goose’s crunchy frogs, and the Yankee Joe’s Scissor maneuver. At this point we had approximately 10 minutes to go and YHC decided abs were not the way to go to kill time. The PAX took a lap around the civic center and ended up waiting on the 6 (YHC). With approximately 7 minutes to go, YHC decided that clearly running was not the way to go. The stair seemed to call out to the PAX as YHC rounded the front of the Warren Harang Municipal building. The Pax lined up and we went up and down 3 or 4 times which seemed to be the best work to rest ratio and as 0559 approached the PAX hit the ground for a minute of merkins or high plank holds until the St. Joseph co Cathedral bells started ringing signifying 0600.

    The PAX circled up around the flags and counted off. Announcements revealed Paradox got JBL charging and a whole hour of questionable music picked out for Saturday’s beatdown. Show up if you can. There will also be a board meeting at some point to further strengthen the inner circles. Prayers were for the ACTs retreat coming up and prayers for Yote’s continued treatment. Yankee Joe then prayed us out. Thanks for letting me lead and not removing my Q card upon completion.
    SYITG,
    Smooth Operator

    P.S.
    AS YHC crafted this beatdown in the parking lot of Tiger Rock Martial Arts (gym?). I thought this beatdown would force the PAX to throw a lot of weight on the ground and hopefully ring the Planet Fitness buzzer a couple times. But on the way to the beatdown, listening to the Exodus 90 scripture reading and reflection a section struck me. It reads, The Psalmist prays: “Moses, God’s chosen one, stood in the breach before him, to turn away his wrath from destroying them” (Psalm 106:23). The Lord calls each of us to do the same for those God has given us to love and lead, to stand in the breach, to be willing to suffer for them, and to call down the Lord’s mercy on them. Today weather the Planet Fitness members knew it or not, The PAX stood in the breach, suffered for them and through suffering hopefully called down the Lord’s mercy on them.  

    P.P.S
    Dumbledore Come Home
     

  • Charmin and the Respectable Camels – from Charmin

    Looking to get back in the gloom again this week, YHC answered the call from Boo-Boo to post and ultimately Q the workout.

    10 x SSH
    10 x Grass Grabbers
    10 x Tie Fighters (all four ways)
    10 x Mountain Goats
    10 x mmp-gms (We ultimately discovered that these should be a 5 count for the full effect of the good-morning)
    15 x mncs

    Carry the Kettlebel To JPAX, where the price tracker camelcamelcamel came up (https://camelcamelcamel.com/)

    The Thang

    Get coupons minus 1

    A dirty Mac deuce with the bell

    Round one

    One person does kb swings
    The other does bench
    Third does bbs
    The fourth person runs the lap as a timer
    Rotate

    Round 2.

    Kb swings, triceps, penguins, lap

    Round 3

    Kb swings, merkins, lbc’s, lap.

    Back to pad

    Cool down

    Low slow squats x 10
    Abe slow godas x 10
    Self love x 10
    Toe touches with cactus arms
    2 minutes of hanging as much as possible.

    Cot

    Prayed for pax and their families who are going through death and pre-death.

  • The Scrum Sentry – from Space Cowboy

    Weather: Temp 49 degrees, mist and windy

    When I arrived at Kennarieridge, the conditions were miserable…cold, windy, misty, flooded grounds, and about 50 floats sitting in the parking lot that I planned to use for today’s beatdown. As I scoped out the scene, I was joined by Kenna Brah and Fracsac. Gave the disclaimer. I thought I could manage the workout around the floats in the lot but I then I noticed the same security guard that chased us out of the lot 2 weeks earlier when it was being used for the Super Bowl bus staging area. Since it was the same 3 PAX as last time, I knew we were marked men and security was waiting for the moment to get back at us for crossing their secured Super Bowl lot.

    While under the watchful eye of security, we moseyed to JPAX for our warmups.
    Samson Stretch x10
    Low Slow Squats x10
    Abe Slogodas x10
    Forward Arm Circles x10
    Backwards Arm Circles x10
    Seal Claps X10
    Imperial Walkers x10
    SSH x20

    Option B since Lot was under secured lockdown (the Thang)
    Run from front of JPAX to Ramp of Pain
    Bear Crawl up and Lunges down
    Run back to front of JPAX
    Burpees x10
    Repeat run to Ramp of Pain with Bear Crawl and Lunges
    Run Back to front of JPAX
    Burpees x10
    Merkins x20
    Repeat run to Ramp of Pain with Bear Crawl and Lunges
    Run Back to front of JPAX
    Burpees x10
    Merkins x20
    Step-Ups 1-1 x30
    Repeat run to Ramp of Pain with Bear Crawl and Lunges
    Run Back to front of JPAX
    Burpees x10
    Merkins x20
    Step-Ups 1-1 x30
    SSH x40

    7’s – BBSU/Inclined Merkins. Up and down side ramp of JPAX

    Headed back to flag with a mix of high knee claps and KOT. At flag, we completed several lunges.
    COT
    Next time, we will take that lot!

  • Never Forget the Disclaimer – from Architect

    48 degrees and misty….gross.

    6 PAX gathered amid the gloomy conditions. Q was intentional about delivering the disclaimer, gotta CYA these days, ya never know who’s out to get ya.

    Warm-a-rama ensued – moseyed to gym, Abes, Love, Fighters, grabbers…then to playground.

    5 Pull-ups, 5 Merkins, 10 squats – repeat for about 6 minutes.

    Rocks selected (cuz it is Rock City, wouldn’t want anyone thinking they came out for anything else) and headed to pavilion.
    Round 1
    12 OHP
    12 Rows, 10 OHP
    12 Curls, 10 Rows, 8 OHP
    12 TriCep, 10 Bicep, 8 Rows, 6 OHP
    12 Chest Press, 10 Tri, 8 Bi, 6 Row, 4 OHP
    12 Kettlebell Swing, 10 CP, 8 Tri, 6 Bi, 4Row, 2 OHP
    Round 2
    12 Rock Burpees
    12 BBSU, 10 RBs
    12 Chest Press, 10 BB, 8 RB
    12 Leg Lifts, 10 CP, 8 BB, 6 RBs
    12 Goblet Squats, 10 LL, 8 CP, 6 BB, 4 RBs
    12 Thrusters, 10 GS, 8 LL, 6 CP, 4 BB, 2 RB (good things i gave disclaimer)

    Return Rock…COT. Cheers