Tag: Isobar

  • Gnarly Nutria IV The Uptown Funk

    Gnarly Nutria IV The Uptown Funk

    YHC began Wednesday morning like any other Wednesday morning with a quality 45 minute beatdown at Popeyes (this Wednesday led by the always dangerous Darkwing Duck). YHC’s thoughts quickly turned to the Gnarly Nutria as a nutria was spotted by Hokie Pokey running in the grass near the Pax. YHC took this as a strong omen for an upcoming victory for the World. The native nutria had come out from its hole to bless the World on the morning of the Gnarly Nutria.

    YHC’s confidence continued to grow as he arrived at the Gnarly Nutria to see members of the World surrounding him as the World came out in force. Surely the World would continue their winning streak and extend their dominance over the Uptowners on their home turf. Reluctant Yankee shouted out the rules and scoring system and led the racers to the starting line.

    A record 91 men lined up for the 4th running of the Gnarly Nutria. 51 for the World. 28 for the Uptowners. 12 for the Northshore. After an odd 2 minute countdown, the runners were off in the humidity and the heat for 5.4 miles of sweaty, stupid joy.

    As YHC rounded the first turn of the Gnarly Nutria with Tua and Heisenberg by his side, he his extreme confidence in a victory began to fade and he knew the world might be in trouble in spite of their superior numbers. A mass of Uptowners burst forward past him with a speed the World would be unable to match.

    Then the funk hit. YHC doesn’t want to know what the Uptowners are doing in their fabled Audubon park but the stink of the park was strong last night and surely slowed down the time of the World and the NorthShore who aren’t accustomed to the Uptown Funk.

    Flatline can hold his head high and claim the title “Fastest Man in F3NOLA” for the next 12 months. Flatline finished the Gnarly Nutria IV in a blistering fast 33 minutes. ESPN8 came in second with 35 minutes. In-Time came in third with a time of 38 minutes. Mulligan finished fourth with 39 minutes and Isobar rounded out the top 5 with 39 minutes and 40 seconds.

    4 of the top 5 were Uptowners with In-Time the top finisher for the NorthShore and Shuffles coming in 7th with the top place for the World. Thanks to their domination in speed, the Uptowners overcame the World’s superior numbers.

    The Uptowners won Gnarly Nutria IV with 326 points.

    The World came in second with 260 points

    Northshore came in third with a respectable 127 points coming from only 12 runners.

    Tripleshift wins the award for most significant run of the night as he rucksaked the race in honor of Terabyte who went to be with his Savior, Jesus Christ earlier this year.

    Bogey wins the award for most beautiful face of the night. Thanks for keeping score and being the pretty face waiting for us at the finish line.

    The After Party

    The Pax of 91 – 5 gathered together for post-race Name-O-Rama and the announcements of the winner and top finishers. The Pax began with a moment of silence and prayer thanking God for Terabyte and the role he played in F3NOLA.

    Followed by a far too long Counterama, followed by a far too long Name-O-Rama, the Pax named 9 FNGs. I am guessing that is a new F3NOLA FNG record. Welcome to Mallrats, Bangs, Johnny Football, Polaroid, Mumbles, Body Shots, Incandescent, Apollo, and Hot Pants.

    The Pax gathered together for the infamous sweaty ball-o-man as YHC closed the Pax out in prayer thanking God for the evening and asking Him to use F3 to impact the lives of more men in NOLA. F3 means so much to all of us and may we not hog and hide the friendship, accountability, and growth we have received in F3. Continue to find those men at your work, neighborhood, and in your families who are isolated and struggling. The average American man has less than one friend. YHC has 91. You have 91. Pass this friendship on to others.

    Your Humble Correspondent,

    Rev Sox

    The Results

    1. Flatline
    2. ESPN8
    3. In Time
    4. Mulligan
    5. Isobar
    6. Waterpik
    7. Shuffles
    8. Turbo Tax
    9. Cavalier
    10. Mahatma-Ice
    11. Screw Top
    12. Cowbell
    13. Tinkles
    14. Saban
    15. Fetch
    16. Baby Bjorn
    17. FNG Alex
    18. El Guapo
    19. Sea Biscuit
    20. Sandbar
    21. Rudy
    22. Ya Mom’n Dem
    23. 86
    24. Shorty
    25. SOGO
    26. Jadaveon
    27. Two Yutes
    28. FNG Deano?
    29. Backdraft
    30. Jesus Juice
    31. Nip Tuck
    32. FNG
    33. Heisenberg
    34. Speedy Gonzalez
    35. Quarter Pipe
    36. Bartman
    37. Rev Sox
    38. Tua
    39. FNG
    40. Shooter
    41. FNG
    42. Pai Gow
    43. Amnesia
    44. Bongo
    45. FracSac
    46. Ocho
    47. FNG
    48. Einstein
    49. Nine Lives
    50. Kuch
    51. Kiss
    52. Tool
    53. Baywatch
    54. Gideon
    55. Chewy
    56. Reluctant Yankee
    57. Gumby
    58. FNG
    59. PoBoy
    60. Woz
    61. FNG
    62. FNG
    63. War Eagle
    64. Tanner
    65. FNG
    66. Hawg
    67. Surge
    68. Chowda
    69. Chips
    70. Darkwing Duck
    71. Hokey Pokey
    72. Triple Shift
    73. Jose 10k
    74. Bushwacker
    75. Brown Bag
    76. Earmuffs
    77. Squeal
    78. Moist
    79. DaParish
    80. Uncle Si
    81. Colonial
    82. Mambi
    83. Short Bus
    84. Left Eye
    85. King Kong
    86. Amnesty
    87. Seaman
    88. Cash Bar
    89. Gold Bar
    90. FNG
    91. FNG
  • Fly and Die

    Gnarly little beatdown planned to work the heartrate in preparation for the Gnarly Nutria. Some highlights: Gatsby’s 2.0 Flying on the flats and dying on the Stairs, Angie’s List’s colon blowouts, El Wire’s hand signal at the video breakdown, the random plastic buckets at the top of WPM, the heat in the stairwells… 29 PAX for a 5th of July run through of WPM!

    Good luck to PEPPA who has his first flights for Southwest this afternoon.

    A good morning then jog over to WPM.

    Disclaimer on the MTN.

    SSH X 20, IMP Squats x 20, Jlo-s x 20 and Merks x 20

    Up the stairs to the top of WPM

    On the TOP – we did Bicycles x 20, Low COuntry Crabs x 20, Dying Roach x 20 and RTwist x 20 — Then we did a loop – down the stairs and up the opposite stairs.

    Did Squats with Sally DOWN/ UP – (FLower by Moby)

    Then another stair loop

    Did Plank Jacks with Merks for Roxanne by the Police. Every Roxanne – merk Every Put on the Red Light = Plank Jack

    Then we did another loop on the stairs.

    At the TOP we used those giant plastic bins to do Dips x 20, Decline shoulder taps x 30 OYO, Bulgarian Split Left x 20, Incline Merks x 12, and Bulgarian Split Right x 20.

    Still had a few minutes so we did LBC x 20 and Freddy Mercury x 20.

    Down to the FLAG and circle up.

    COT–prayed for our deployed and committed to being better men

  • Focus and Embrace the Suck on the Mountain

    YHC saw an opening to take the Q at WPM and jumped on it. Arriving early enough to welcome the Pax, the disclaimer was given, then mosey away from the Mountain so a U-turn could be made to the open grass in front of Tulane for the warmup.

    First count off, which always throws the men of WPM for a loop, especially when they have to remember the number. 34 men were ready to get sweaty.

    SSH IC x 31
    Imperial Walkers IC x 15
    Grass Grabbers IC x 10
    Arm Circles IC x 20
    Peter Parker IC x 20
    Mountain Climber IC x 20
    Parker Peter IC x 20

    Mosey toward the Mountain. Stop for a 20 yard Bear Crawl and Catalina Wine Mixers IC x 10.

    Mosey to the Mountain and partner up for a little “Catch Me if You Can” up the Mountain. Pax 1 runs backwards up the Mountain while Pax 2 completes 3 Burpees and runs to catch Pax 1. Flapjack all the way to the top. Once on top, do shoulder taps waiting for the six.

    Time to test the Focus of the Pax. Circle up for Fracsac Focus Fun! Asked a Pax for their number, which was maybe 19? The rules are simple, the Pax completes a total of 19 SSH’s IC. However, only 10 are counted out loud. For the final 9, all Pax must stop on time counting internally only. Counting out loud beyond 10 incurs a penalty. Not stopping at 19 incurs a penalty. The Q is the perfect count, aka “my cadence is pure.”

    Round 1 – The Pax incurred a 10 Burpee penalty

    Embrace the Suck
    7 – SSH
    7- Merkins
    7 – jumpsquats
    Continue over and over for 3 minutes, yelling out rounds completed.
    1 minute rest
    Rinse and Repeat for 3 minutes, trying to improve upon total rounds completed.

    Try the Fracsac Focus Fun again. Ask for a number, maybe 23? SSH IC x 15 followed by the other 8 in silence. While calling out instructions, YHC looks over at some commotion and finds Mahatma penalizing 2 Pax for not knowing what the number of SSH’s to do would be! With the Pax on high alert, this one was for sure going to be a success!

    Spoiler Alert – Fail! YHC announces the penalty will be at the base of the Mountain. Take the stairs down and complete Shoulder Taps while waiting for the six. Mosey to the grassy area by the benches for redemption!

    10 SSH’s IC x 10 followed by 3 in silence. Oh Pax of WPM…how you must love burpees! With another failure in hand, time was running out. Mosey to the Touchdown Jesus grass for the 10 penalty Burpees OYO. Mosey back to the flag.

    COT
    Count off, name-o-rama, announcements, intentions, closed with a prayer.

    NMM

    We had 2 FNG’s today, welcome Bubble Wrap and Butter! Keep posting! YHC enjoys WPM and always has a good time as Q. There was mumblechatter about how the Burpees were coming regardless of how well the Focus went. With multiple failures, one will never know….

    Coffeteria at PJ’s was excellent as always. F3 has made me a better person, and I thank all my F3 brothers for continuing to guide and support me. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of this and for posting with me!

    SYITG