F3 New Orleans

Tag: Lion’s Den

  • SHOULDER SHUDDERS – from Wet Tap

    7/27/23

    YHC thought long and hard about this morning. Writing and re-writing a plan for this beatdown. Coming off a lonely Q on Monday ( only a select few experienced the joy), and reading what sounded like a great Q on Tuesday Tuff, YHC was hesitant on building a challenging beatdown, maybe I should let the men rest. I mean it’s Thursday It’s …… WHAT! I slap myself and come to grips with what the PAX needs, not what they want!
    We are approaching the SV500 and each member of this glorious group needs to prepare accordingly. I put my coupon and Revelations Chapter down and dove into a build.

    Let us begin,

    Warmarama in typical cadence format.
    SSH, windmills, high knees, arm circles and CP.

    Thang1.
    A mile warmup gets the blood flowing, and with the only way to achieve any elevation gains is stairs. Thankfully the den is blessed with a small set. Therefore- a 4lap loop with stair runs. Every step, every other, left foot hops, and right foot hops. Everyone made it and the chatter was eerily quiet.

    Thang 2.

    Trust is important when it comes to your PAX. And truthfully YHC feels this way about these men whom I call the cult family. The PAX hold plank in a line while the first man gets up and broad jumps over each member only to hold plank at the end. Rinse and repeat until we reach the pair of ducks watching us and mumbling about our technique and lack of tenacity. Challenge accepted.

    Thang3.

    Cone drill bear crawl . The PAX was divided into two teams. Across the lawn and up the hill (30 yard), Each team in pair would bear crawl with a speed cone to the drop and run back. With a whole lotta cones, this took each team 7-8 turns bear crawlin’.
    Team yellow took the win with an all out bear sprint by YHC and Montana and lunge run type thing by Dox and Goose. It was a sight to see. Something between a Duck and praying mantis. All were in awe.

    Thang4.

    Coupon drills
    Thrusters to ground- clean and press 25
    Murder bunny 25 yd
    Overhead coupon Genuflections 25
    redrum bunny 25 yd
    Curls for girls 100
    The genuflection rifle holding a coupon made us all rethink life. We encountered, adapted, and succeeded. T-claps to all.

    6:00 am came and daylight revealed the end to another beatdown.

    Name off with announcements. GiGi was pulled off Yankee and awarded to bone thugs! 1st time recipient! I feel it won’t be the last.
    COT and prayers by Montana

    #goose #paradox #yankee #montana #michilin # smooth # bone thugs # wetTap

  • Battle of the Ages – from Cardinal

    YHC found himself the victim of guerrilla warfare. An unknown PAX threw YHC’s name on the Q sheet unbeknownst to him (there was verbal chatter about taking said Q, admittedly). But always ready to face a challenge, a beatdown was put together. The chatter on the GroupMe focused on the wide age difference between the old fogeys and the young bucks, so a “battle of the ages” was crafted to settle the debate.

    Warmup of the usual fare kicked us off (SSH, WM, IW, FAC/BAC/CP, SL).

    Thang 1 was a celebration of a recent 21st birthday among the PAX (T-claps to French Horn, who was only at “hc” status and thus nowhere to be found). We started with 3 rounds of 21s – first round was high knees, second round was grass grabbers with the clap, and third round was Bobby Hurley’s. YHC had not even thought of a penalty because he was so confident that the PAX could count to 21 with ease. However, that proved not to be the case. EVERY SINGLE ROUND was failed by at least one of the PAX (although the first round may have been intentionally sabotaged by GiGi). A hastily created penalty was a lap around the Civic Center. They say education is bad in Louisiana….and YHC can confirm that.

    Thang 2 was an homage to two of the greatest hits when these 40+ fogeys were in their prime – Thunderstruck and No Scrubs (which was at the top of multiple lists YHC found while researching, despite a near unanimous disdain for the song). Thunderstruck was a simple burpee on “Thunder”, and No Scrubs was holding Al Gore while doing a jump at each “no” (which was a lot).

    Thank 3 closed us out with the triumph of the greatest generation – the Millennial. It involved 10 rounds of 100 reps each, with a 100m mosey in between each round (thus adding up to 2000 total reps/meters). However, due to YHC’s poor time calculations, we only got through 6 rounds before we had to call it – SSH, LBCs, Merkins, Lunges, Oblique Crunches, and Mountain Climbers. YHC noticed the total silence during this entire thang – until Goose started his oblique crunches, which garnered widespread admiration at the form and technique. Comparisons were made to drilling for oil as well as cattle roping. Make of that what you will.

    Dox prayed us out after COT and some announcements about the second annual SV500 – supporting a great charity in the Houma-Thibodaux area next month. Check us out and sign up! https://f3thibodaux.regfox.com/the-st-vincent-500-2023

    Always a blessing gentlemen. Might be some more Cardinal Q’s on the horizon.

    SYITG

    Cardinal

  • Be the Rock! – from Goldilocks

    Goldilocks showed up to the Lion’s Den fifteen minutes early to a bit of a drizzle. No one was there which made Lox’s heart thump a little bit. Did he come to the place? However, Goose and Pope showed up which made his little heart calm down. The rest of the Pax showed up to Goldilocks’ VQ and we were ready to roll.

    The warmups were the normal: SSH, Wind Mills, Imperial Walkers, arm circles, cherry pickers, and some self love. Lox was excited and his cadence may have been quicker then the Pax was accustomed too, but it got the job done!

    Thang #1

    Lox then revealed the theme: St. Peter, the Rock of the Church. The Pax would follow in his footsteps as seen in the last chapter of the Gospel of John. This would begin with an Indian Run with the last person doing five merkins before sprinting to the front. St. Peter was running away from his vocation, and was a little proud so the Pax needed to get their chest big like him. He was also a fisherman so DJ Dox and his faithful sidekick JBL played some drunken sailor tunes for us. Members like Smooth and Michelin kicked into high gear and sprinted faster than the eye can see, but Cardinal still slowed down the pace (guess he didn’t wanna run too far from our Lord).

    Thang #2

    Bear crawl into 14 Bonnie Blair’s and 15 Diamond Merkins followed by crab walk into 14 J Lo’s and 15 squat jumps (x3) 29 reps on each side. June 29th is St. Peter’s Feast Day.

    Lox then brought us to the next part of the Pax’s journey with St. Peter. The Lord had asked Peter, “Do you love me more than these?”. Peter responded, “Yes, Lord you know that I love you.” Jesus then told him to feed his sheep. So the Pax would get at feeding dem lambs! This would entail a bear crawl to chase after the lost sheep catching them with some lunges and merks, but then the Pax had to bring the sheep back home with a bear crawl and the celebrate the return of lost sheep with some J Lo’s and squat jumps. DJ Dox gave us some Bieber to inspire us to work admit not knowing what the Lord was up to.
    The Pax felt good after only doing this once (Econdoline hadn’t even given us a grunt yet!) Lox then crushed their spirits reminding the Pax that the Lord asked the same question a second time. So the Pax got after it again for round 2. DJ Dox hit us up with some Queen and Econdoline gave us his famous grunts. Meanwhile Cardinal was still smoking all of us in crab walking, and Smooth was showing us his hips don’t lie with those sets of J Lo’s which would inevitably win him GiGi.
    The Pax crawled in after round 2 only to get hit again with the same thang. The Lord had asked Peter a third time, leading Peter to frustration. Lox hit the Pax with round 3, which led to the same response. Round 3 showed us what was really happening. Dox was tired of Cardinal smoking the Pax in crab walks, so he played some defense and sacrificed himself to get in the way of the flaming Cardinal, only slowing him down a bit. What a courageous solider that Dox is! Michelin showed some real heart as Lox yelled at the Pax to BE THE ROCK! This would win him Animal! Goose still finished first as always.

    Thang #3

    The Pax ended with some Mary, knowing that it is only with her help that we can follow the Lord admits trial and tribulation.

    Lox is super grateful for these F3 brothers, and is inspired everyday by their unwavering commitment to each other and to their own health. Keep going strong and be that rock! COT and pray led by Michelin closed us out.

  • The death of pro shop Barry – from Wiford Montana

    This morning rolled up with much anticipation. 1yr ago was YHC first que and it happened to be the VQ of the infamous, ISI loving, jerf spitting, Yankee Josephine. That day was one to remember but this day was about showing appreciation, an appreciation of a group of like minded men that go far beyond some short one liners. Yes, we laugh and are still in utter shock at the length of goose’s shorts(I wouldn’t let my daughters out in that length inseam) but it’s beyond that. I made the decision to stick with F3 and the friendships made even in short 12 months are game changing. Keep showing up and also keep “heat checking” ur pax all u can it means something! So I will explain what we did but know what u so goes beyond the struggle.

    Warm up Tana style:
    A mix of permissible mumble chatter, backwards 1st arm circles, and bricked up Moroccan lunge nightclubs (shown by Enron,explained in great detail by Dox)

    Thang 1:
    Run the reservoir Indian run style with bricks then after the lap do 64 reps (1 for ever lb lost since Jan 1)

    Thang 2: “if you can read this ur in trouble”
    An ode to the YJ vq and his wrestling dayz
    30 alarm clocks
    30 lbc
    30 Turkish alarm clocks
    30 big boyz

    Thang 3: Diddle Death March
    Paradiddle had the pax needing more a couple weeks back when he ran us into the ground so I wanted to bring this back as part of the top Tana awards
    Burpee 10,8,7,6……1 but a long transfer jog in between

    We finished with a final lap around the building.

    Cot and Diddle prayed us out!

    SYITG
    Tana

  • The Fat Boy Food Adventure – from Smooth Operator

    Participants: paradox, Enron, superfund, FNG (Michelin), Yankee Joe, Paradiddle, Goose, Smooth Operator

    I pulled up to the Lions Den at 0455 to find a FNG sitting in his truck. It looks like he had been there for quite some time and was ready to get his first F3 experience going.

    After that Enron pulled up and started giving us the synopsis of his Mexico City trip. He went on a guys trip and apparently ate at one of the best restaurants in the world, but for some reason either the restaurant or all of Mexico does not do Michelin stars. This brought us to another interesting topic, the Michelin star program is put on by the same people who sell tires. You learn something new everyday.

    At 0515 we had 7 eager adventurers rocking out to YHC’s musical fanny pack, and ready to overcome whatever craziness that YHC had planned for the PAX.

    We started with SSH and Goose gave the F3 disclaimer. After this we did windmills, arm circles cherry pickers, high knees, butt kicks, and mountain climbers. Somewhere in the middle of this Paradiddle snuck in probably saying something about a train or stomach issues or being busy making a list as reasons for his tardiness. Either way this dude is always ready to roll on minimal warm ups.

    The thang

    After this it was time to talk about our adventure. Two things you need to know about YHC. Even though I lost a little bit of weight YHC is still a certified fat boy. It has nothing to do with F3 which has done great things for me but it kind of hard to outwork the fork when you spend most days eating like crap. It’s something I got to work on and I will, but first I figured let’s have fun with it. Secondly through the last couple monthly challenges YHC has learn that I like to ruck and am not a big fan of long distance running which seems to be involved in the majority of our beatdowns. So I figured let’s combine these two things and let’s see what happens. This is how YHC came up with the Fat Boy Food Adventure.

    The Fat Boy Food Adventure basically goes like this, the PAX would carry our coupons in whatever manner possible to various locations visiting some of YHC’s favorite restaurants in the area. The only time we would need to put the coupons down is to perform some manner of exercise that would almost always be more taxing on the body than rucking. Our mode of transport would be an Indian ruck with the last person dropping off to do a couple man makers and hustled to the front of the line. We started with 5 man makers and eventually went down to 3 then 1 as our journey got more difficult and time started to become a factor.

    First things first, we started our journey at the flag with 25 man makers which seemed to be a big hit with the PAX. From here we headed up the reservoir and across the bridge to the parking lot of 5 guys burger joint all the while jamming out to some southern and classic rock complemented by a couple of Spotify ads.

    At 5 guys, we did 25 coupon curls and 25 Chuck Norris merkins and discussed there delicious burgers, cajun fries, and YHC’s personal favorite their bacon flavored milk shake. It was nice to put a-little sweat equity down as payment for the next time YHC goes there to shovel down some more greasy food. After this, we continued our journey across the slightly less deserted parking lot of Rouses to our next work out location. After everyone completed 5 man makers YHC dropped it down to 3 due to the doozy of a work out coming next.

    Our next stop was across the large parking lot of Rouses heading up LA 308 where a car was parked conveniently about 30 to 40 yards away. YHC decided this would be our stopping point for some parking lot suicides.
    Half the PAX would be doing suicides while the other half completed 25 coupon squats and then we switched.
    The suicides were pretty straight forward, touch the closest yellow line and head back to the curb hitting every line until you reached the car.

    After this we headed to another great restaurant Big Mikes BBQ. You could smell the meat smoking as we reached the parking lot for another exercise. The exercise was 25 world war 2 sit ups and some bear crawl suicides. Once we started doing sit-ups YHC realized that we would not be able to complete the entire exercise as planned so YHC started cutting it down to make it back to the flag for 0600. So YHC deferred the bear crawl till Part 2 and we continued our ruck.

    The Pax started rucking down the road passing in front of Anytime fitness, the dog park and hustled up the reservoir levee. We stopped near the bridge intersection and performed 15 coupon swing which may have disrupted a couple of curious reservoir walkers on accident.

    From here we headed to the Civic center HVAC system to do our next exercise. At the Back corner of the Civic center we did 15 tricep curls and headed back to the flag to complete our last leg of the ruck.

    Once at the flag with a couple minutes to spare the PAX completed 25 more world war 2 sit ups, 25 PAX approved star jumps, and Apollo onos AMRAP for a couple minutes as 0600 was approaching quickly.

    We finished up with COT and named our new FNG Michelin due to our pre beatdown conversations and the fact that he is a trained chef. Paradox passed the distinguished ANIMAL shirt to a well deserving Superfund. Enron prayed us out as a muffler-less vehicle decided to make its presence known.

    Thanks to all the PAX who came out and decided to embark on this adventure. Without y’all always pushing YHC to the limit, I would still be a sad clown sitting on the sideline.

    SYITG

    Smooth Operator

    Part 2 coming to the Lion’s Den soon

  • Death is Temporary – from Goose

    YHC thought it appropriate to capitalize on the cardio boost most of the PAX have experienced as a result of participating in the May Challenge as well as the increase in tenacity and mental toughness. And, stepping down the intensity could be a slippery slope. Only one way to go! DEATH!!
    It is YHC’s understanding that in the earliest days of Christianity, when they would baptize someone, they would bring them to a river, put them all the way under water, and then hold them there until they started to panic and fight before bringing them up. This was to give the baptizee a real, felt experience of the reality of death in the process of receiving the gift of new life. Any taste of the reality of your own mortality changes you, grounds you, and shines new, clearer light on all the other aspects of your life.
    So, what better day than a day in which we’re proud of what we’ve accomplished, what we’ve built over the month of May, to feel our own mortality.

    We started with a warmup of the usuals along with some Willie Mays Hayes before Indian running (regular type) up the levee, around half the lake, and onto the tennis courts. In a nod to Dox, YHC brought along Oontz and a sea shanty about the death of an honored general (“General Taylor” by Great Big Sea). This was where YHC realized that Oontz hadn’t somehow gained strength by resting him for a few months. This didn’t bode well for what was to come.

    On the tennis courts, the PAX waited patiently while YHC and Pope set up yet another Bleep Test, once again measuring wrongly, too short this time (that first lap felt way too easy), though after the beatdown looking back, I’m sure many were grateful for the rest.
    Once we finally got it right, Oontz was fired up–he already seemed nervous during the Indian Run, and without JBL or BAPS available, I could tell he also felt like the benchwarmer who had been called up after everyone else caught the stomach bug or something. His bleeps were barely audible despite multiple threats and ridicule, but the game went on, and the PAX performed exceedingly well.
    The first few times we did this, most PAX didn’t make it out of the 30’s (number of lengths run, not official Bleep Test scoring, which is weird). Last time, at The Stage, most didn’t start falling away until the 40’s and some into the 50’s. Today, though, there was not one PAX who dropped off until around 60. No joke. Once out, the rules were you had to plank up or complete 25 merkins (or Big Boys) to buy your way back in, which they did. We ultimately finished at 70, blowing our numbers from two weeks ago (or so) out of the water. I think it was because of the hype speech YHC was giving while measuring (and remeasuring): men who fought in battles, who sprinted across fields toward enemies who were sprinting at them, who rode into hand to hand combat with no fear of death or knowledge of the outcome, who still bust down doors with no certainty of what’s behind them, at some point stopped trying to calculate their odds of survival. They didn’t self-evaluate to see how tired they were or wonder how much longer they could endure; they just moved. And, today, we grew in our ability to let go of wondering how much more we can do, in our ability to push off the temptation to say, “Ok, but only 3 or 2 or 1 more of these.” We still, of course, have a long way to go, which is why the 2nd thang was what it was.

    After multiple 10-counts, we moseyed back to the Lion, picked up our blocks, and moved to the sidewalk. We lined up and YHC explained that we would be doing 11’s: bicep curls on this end and tricep curls at the next (20-25 yards). Transportation would be lunge walks (with coupon) there and rifle carry back. YHC heard a couple of groans, saw some mouths drop open, and in a couple of faces, just blank surrender–the decision to just enter into the pain without trying to measure it, cuz, hey, who of us actually deserves ease and comfort?
    The first few laps were hard, which YHC expected–muscles gotta wake up and get with the program. After 5 or 6, YHC could feel the temptation to modify it to 7’s instead of 11’s, but then I remembered the many times I just kept pushing, grinding one more lap, then another, without wondering how many more I could take, not giving myself the choice to stop, and it’s amazing how much further you can go when you stop giving yourself a way out. We had the time, so we just kept going. And the rest of the PAX did, too. It was a beautiful thing to see.

    We finished right at 6:00, but the pride and gratitude of what we had just accomplished together (and over the past month) didn’t hit until after about 4 or 5 minutes (after the heart rate dropped back down to normal). There was no Animal shirt (or GiGi), but the each man’s performances could’ve easily earned it. (YHC was waiting for French to crush another coupon, and was a little disappointed that he didn’t. Three in a row would’ve been epic.)

    COT and French Horn prayed us out–safe travels for the many out this weekend and gratitude for what we’ve been given. YHC is certainly grateful for the men who posted this morning and shared a healthy little taste of death. Nothing binds you together as brothers better than that!

    SYITG,
    Goose

  • Earn that Wood – from Wiford Montana

    9 at the Den and the Q was Co
    Next man up to fill in for Jeaux

    Late Tana and you hate to see it
    Running warmup and you couldn’t flee it

    9 in a row for diddle , I hear a rustle
    Cardinal back from another vacation but we respect the hustle

    We would pay the troll then dance to a song
    The hills were steep and the tunes were long

    Burpees , unwelcomed but they did feel good
    Tana made it weird to earn that wood

    Roxeanne and the police till our legs were bare
    Marvin Gaye moved mountains but the price was fair

    Squats to Bonnie just for your butt
    Then we asked Lil Jon turned down for what ?

    COT and Cardinal prayed us out
    3x animal for Diddle, the man is stout !

    My boys in Thib , we got dat dawg
    Tana and Dox , we’ll see you again in the fog

  • Show Up and Find Out – from Smooth Operator

    Show Up And Find Out

    Paradiddle, Pope, Goose, Paradox, Yankee Joe, Tana, French Horn, Smooth Operator

    After sending some slightly inebriated cryptic pictures as beat down hype, YHC was not sure what kind of turn out to expect. YHC showed up at the Den around 0415 to do a little levee scouting and rack up the ruck mileage for our May challenge. Around 0440, Paradox and YJ pulled into the parking lot and started pounding the pavement making circles around the reservoir. Pope and Goose were the next to arrive around 0450 and had the same intentions. 75% of the Smoothie Kings completed a mile and headed back to the flag. Tana arrived next along with French Horn, and Paradiddle seemed to appear out of thin air.

    Alright warm ups went like this:

    Side Straddle Hops
    Wind Mills
    High Knees
    Butt Kicks
    Arm Circles
    Self Love

    Yankee Joe like worrying about odd numbers so I threw in a 27 count of side straddle hops to make his noggin start hurting.

    I picked 3 people with a special connection to May 18th that I felt exemplified the 3 F’s of F3 and I broke them down into 3 Thangs. I also decided it would be a makeshift guessing game. So let’s get to it.

    Thang 1 (Faith)
    The first guy’s birthday was May 18th 1920.
    Through his Papacy he worked toward ending communism and building bridges to people of different religions.
    He was also a big fan of skiing.
    He is St. Pope John Paul the 2nd.
    Ole Yankee Joe got it right

    From the flag we went ahead and started with an Indian run which the last guy would be doing 5 genuflections while we ran 1 ½ times around the reservoir levee. From here we would be doing some levee climbing.

    We went ahead and did 10 Carolina Dry Docks on top the levee. Ran down the levee and did 10 WW2 sit ups. All of this took place on the front side of the reservoir between the reservoir and Hwy 20 for advertising purposes. All in all we completed between 5 and 6 sets and we moseyed to the baseball field.

    Thang 2 (Fitness)
    Our second guy’s special connection to May 18th was a little different. On May 18th 2004, This 40 year old threw MLB’s 17th perfect game.
    He was a 5 time Cy Young award winner and won a World Series with the Diamondbacks.
    He was also a member of the 300 win club and a 1st ballot hall of farmer.
    He is Randy Johnson
    French Horn got this one correct and knew a lot more about the big unit than anyone else did. T-Claps buddy.

    In honor of his perfect game we would run around the bases 27 times in sets of 6. In between sets we would be doing 10 Chuck Norris style merkins. Around lap 24 or 25 YHC had to call it due to time purposes. It was definitely not due to the stars and black dots that had started clouding YHC’s vision. After this we moseyed back to the flag to find out who our final May 18th guy would be.

    Thang 3(Fellowship)
    As DJ YJ set up the speaker for YHC, we started talking about another man born on May 18th. His birth year was 1952.
    He was dubbed the King of Country Music. After this one a lot of guess started flying. I heard Hank Williams, Alan Jackson, Merle Haggard, Johnny Cash. All wrong.
    He had 60 #1 hits over a 30 year period.
    He is George Straight.
    French Horn got this one correct also. Looks like that college education is paying off buddy.

    The first musical work out would be to the song Fireman by King George. Whenever the PAX would hear “They call me the Fireman” We would switch gears from mountain climbers to merkins.

    2nd musical work out would be the song Murder on Music Row by Alan Jackson and George straight. This workout would be done similar to the first song but the switch would be done on the phrase “music row”. The two workout were WW2 sit ups and Heels to heaven.

    After this song YHC called it at 0559. I had another musical work out planned, but it worked out for the best “A love without end, Amen” would have probably been a little awkward between ole Goose and Pope. From here we counted off one short due to Paradox cutting out 5 minutes early. We had announcements and Tana prayed us out.

    Total count for the May challenge was 150 Merkins, 100 WW2 sit ups, and 2 miles run.

    P.S. Around lap 18 or 20 of running the bases is when YHC realized that he was surrounded by 7 certified beasts. Y’all keep up the good work fellas. I hope one day I can get to y’all level of fitness.

    SYITG,
    Smooth

  • Just Do Stuff for 40 minutes – from Yankee Joe

    YHC has been called many things in his life. Some have said he’s stubborn. Others have said he’s a bit arrogant. Not a few folks have made the outlandish claim that YHC tends to be melodramatic…perhaps even moody. Still others would even go so far as to note YHC sucks at maff.

    Regardless of what these peasants may say, I am not any of these things and the very fact that such atrocious slander would be heaped on my flawless purveyance of righteousness is nothing short of Paradox-level hypocrisy. After all, Enron, 3.8 lbs + 3.8 lbs = 10 lbs. I have spoken.

    How does this translate into a beatdown? Your guess is as good as mine. Take a little bit of stubborn cockiness, a heaping tablespoon of dramatic (if not grumpy) flare, and a complete mockery of Euclid’s legacy, and you have whatever the hell this morning was.

    For context, as we approach the completion of our second week with the May Challenge, point totals like 1,000 have taken on special significance. The men in Cleveland are no dummies. There is no easy way or even loop hole to racking up points. So, this morning was supposed to be a frontal assault on that hill.
    —————————————

    The idea was that running quarter mile distances in an 8 minute pace (2 minutes), followed by 1 minute of exercises, aiming for at least 45 points (merkins, BBS, coupon curls, and/or pullups), one could – in fully ungrounded theory – achieve 1,000 points in 40 minutes. The breakdown is below:

    – 2 minute quarter mile (25 points)
    – 1 minute exercises (45 pt total)
    – Total: 70 points

    Repeat above combo 12 times for 840 total points.

    The beauty of this is that the above cycle would take 36 minutes, thus leaving 4 minutes to work. Since partial miles don’t count, it would be a blitzkrieg of exercises, aiming for 160 points or 40 points each of the last four minutes.

    840 + 160 = 1,000 (see, I do maff good)

    You might say, hitting 160 points in four minutes is impossible. Ok, then ruck one of the three miles accumulated from the quarter mile sprints (four quarter mile runs with weight). If carrying 30 lbs, for example, your last four minutes looks like 130 points (32.5 pts per minute). AND if the PAX showed up stretched and ready to go, then you could add 5 more minutes to the overall beatdown, which would further distribute the per minute point totals across the beatdown OR give you enough time to add a fourth mile.

    The logic is sound. The execution would need to be relentlessly methodical. Trying to pull it off 10 days into the May Challenge at the Lion’s Den was delusional.
    ——————————————

    The beatdown structure was simple:

    Run a series of quarter miles if you want to build points that way, otherwise do whatever the hell you want. After the dust settled, the average point accumulation was between 615 and 670 (not counting any pre-beatdown work). **Not bad at all considering that this time the mileage was actually accurate to the hundredth of a mile.**

    – Paradox stayed true to the run/exercise sequence. He even threw in some pull-ups on a bar that I couldn’t have reached jumping.

    – Similar to YHC, Enron abandoned some of the run early to focus on his uncanny strength with merkins and coupon curls.

    – Goose seemingly completed 9 million big boy sit-ups and stuck to the run combo.

    – It appeared as if Picadilly ran for 40 minutes straight, but he also knocked out a bunch of exercise points.

    AND though this individual PAX commands plenty of respect, I think the level falls woefully short of the awe we should have for 14-year old Pope. This dude is a beast now. In a few years, he is going to redesign F3 because it’s not hard enough for him. He just never stopped…like literally went all out for 40 minutes straight.

    (In the beginning of the beatdown, I asked Pope if he wanted full bricks (for mini-rucking) or half bricks. He politely asked for the full bricks. The look on his face, however, politely told me that if I ever disrespected him like that again, he’d make half bricks by breaking full bricks over my head.)

    Exact point totals for each PAX is somewhat known, but will not be published here, lest Enron decides to live into his F3 name. You know what he’s like when looking at numbers on a spreadsheet. The temptation to cook the books is just too strong. You go to a barber shop long enough, you’ll eventually get your hair cut (or so I’m told).

    That said, based on casual convos following the beatdown, and including pre-beatdown runs by Enron, Paradox, Goose, Pope, and YHC, my best maff skilz puts totals between 870 – 925.

    The challenge is on. 1000 points in 40 minutes. It can be done. Who will answer the call?

    SYITG,

    Yankee Jeaux

  • That’s No Moon… – from Paradox

    A long long time ago , in a Lions Den not too far away 7 pax assembled on May the 4th to defeat the mighty Death star.
    YHC would love to tell you we met this terror with a united pax but recent May challenge skirmishes have our x wings loaded with Ether and drawing lines in the Tatooine sand.

    Darth Ragnar Tana flew his silent Rav4Destroyer and met two of his JV crew from planet Chackbay. M2d2 and Cardinal3PO flexed in synchronized maroon ready to steal hundreds of points. YHC (palpatinDox? No? Ok I’ll keep workshopping it ) had his two Threat Level Midnight Allie’s, Ron Solo and DillyBaca ready to continue the force choking points party. Finally no defeat of the empire can occur without Goose Skywalker and His padawan Pope plus the trusted Yoda mat. (Wise to bring it , he was). We put aside our alliances for 45 minutes to bring peace to the galaxy.

    Duke! Put down that lightsaber and roll the bean footage!

    Warmup
    The usuals
    Tana continues to need a seminar on warmup protocol. I’ll be reaching out to his former educators for advise. This will definitely come up in todays Teams Call.

    YHC introduced the DeathStar

    5 stations dispersed along a roughly estimated .7 miles ish
    1: coupon curls at lion
    2: Stairs 20 merkins
    3: bench 20 bbsu
    4: dock 20 wide merkins
    5: tennis court 20 ww1 sit-ups

    Round 1
    Tour the stations All together mosey in between and get a feel for the enemy.

    Round 2
    Han Solo Mission
    Everyone on your own
    Pope took the title at 5:56 and secured the Animal performance of the beatdown

    Round 3
    Siths come in pairs
    Pair up and you can help your partner finish Reps buttt this round you have 40

    Round 4
    Defeat the Death Star as a team
    Team communication and effort to beat 6 minutes on the course.
    We sprinted to the flag for 6a, Saved the galaxy of Houma Thibodaux but we did perish in the blast by missing those last 20 star jumps. Just know that years from now when Yankee Jeauxbi One Kenobi tells our story at the Jedi Temple we will all be remembered as galactic heroes.

    COT and Dilly prayed us out

    NMM

    Coming together is a beginning
    Staying together is progress
    Working together is success
    – Henry Ford

    – Great morning seeing and feeling the progression from solo work, to pairs, to a full team push. YHC needs constant reminders of the strength of leaning on strong bonds during overwhelming times and I’m grateful to have you men as a safety net.

    See you in the gloom
    Dox