F3 New Orleans

Tag: Nip/Tuck

  • Tsunami

    A balmy morning greeted us on the final day of April 2019.

    8 Pax gathered for a leg workout on the Mountain.

    We ran up the stairs to the top of Wolfpack Mountain for a warmup:

    25 Sidestraddle Hops, 10 Grass Grabbers, 10 Windmills, 20 Peter Parkers.

    Then it was on to the M-I-L-F-S workout.

    We began by running down the stairs to the 1st floor and then back to the top of the Mountain. At the top 50 monkey humper’s were enthusiastically performed.

    Back down the stairs to the 2nd floor and up to the top for 50 imperial walkers.

    Back down the stairs to the 3rd floor and up to the top for 50 lunges.

    We continued this with 50 Freddy Mercury’s and finally 50 shoulder tap murkins.

    With energy to spare, Quarterpipe went for a solo bear crawl while the rest of the pax sucked wind. Strong!

    Then it was time for Dora 1-2-3.

    50 Burpees, 100 Plank Jacks and 150 LBCs.

    Next a circle of Mary:

    15 WW2 Situps, 20 Penguins, 20 Hello Dollies, 20 Low Country Crabs, and 20 American Hammers (lead by Doullie).

    Finally down the stairs to the benches for 20 dips and 15 durkins.

  • Retirement? We don’t need no stinking retirement!

    Due to a weekend of crawfish, second-lines, retirement party, and jazzfest, the fearless Q had lost his voice. So after a quick warmup of side-straddle hops, windmills, and imperial walkers, the silent, but deadly workout began. The circuit order was drawn in chalk on the ground of the picnic area. Pax would complete an exercise, take a lap (appx .25 miles per lap), then start the next exercise at their own pace.

    Total run length: 2.4 miles.

    Jump squats – 50

    Stacked foot, staggered hand muricans – 25 per side

    R+L leg step ups – 25x per side

    Dips – 50

    Burpees – 25

    Box Jumps – 25

    Decline muricans – 25

    Power ups – 25 per side

    With 10 minutes remaining, we started a Mary at the flag with 2xPAX at a time doing pull-ups instead of Mary for the duration of the exercise. Mary exercises included, american hammer, hello dolly, hello rosalita, box cutters, LBCs, V ups, and penguins.

    Overhead at the end “never regret a workout, but that was a TOUGH one.” As always, it was a pleasure to lead!

  • Rise of the Q

    El Wire couldn’t Q this AM – has been getting his butt kicked at work! So I decided to take the Q for him. I haven’t been taking the DAILY RED PILL the last few glooms. After some nudges from Tinkles and Angie’s List – I knew 4 misses were too many in a row – so I was back out in the GLOOM.

    We started with a heckle from Swamp Cock to quit talking and get to work. We mosey’d over field across from the zoo. Here we had our first COP:

    SSH x 20, Slow Squats x 20, Dying Bugs x 20, Mtn Climbers x 20 and Morning Glories x 10.

    Mosey’d over to the FLY. On the way we got crushed by the stench of dead crawfish.

    Circled up by the RIVER – beautiful view of the Mississippi.

    Here we did IC Merks x 20, Walking Planks x 20, Wife Pleasers x 20, One leg left wife pleasers x 15, one leg right wife pleasers x 15, fire hydrants each leg x 20, Donkey Kicks x 20 (supposed to switch at 10, Bartman forgot now one butt cheek is bigger than the other!)

    From here we Mosey’d over to Monkey Hill. At Monkey Hill we did MONKEY HUMPERS 20 on one side, climbed over and did 18, then back for 16, and bounce 14,12,10, 8. At 8 we stopped.

    We lined up for some head to head sprints: Tinkles vs I Love You Man – I love you man won. Yankee vs Stubing – Yankee lost, Stubing won but it was close, Sandbar vs Saban, GSpot vs NipTuck, etc I didn’t check in to see who the victors were but I definitely ran faster bc I was running against another human. I plan on bringing more of this type of thing – I need this kind of pressure.

    After our sprints we did the long mosey to the labyrinth. PAX was required to PINGPONG back and forth to sweep the SIX. Before the mosey we did 20 LBT and PICKLE POUNDERS to catch our breath – then we took off.

    At the labyrinth we did 20 dips IC on the benches, 20 dying roaches, 20 lbcs, 20 Russian twists, and 20 low country crabs. After that we did some backward bear crawls, sideways bear crawls.

    After this we mosey’d back to the FLAG. At the FLAG we did a plank rotation to fill the last 2 minutes.

    Always a pleasure to lead, thanks for the nudges aka mini headlocks to get me back to the gloom. I usually resist the wake up but I have NEVER regretted posting in the gloom.
    See you in the gloom every Mon, Wed, Fri for the near future!

  • 1 lil 2 lil 3 lil running men

    Nice cool April 15th morning, tax day at its finest.

    Started out with a casual jog to circle up near the track. A few stretches and a 15 count of windmills (yes I said count).

    Then to the track to preform exercises, descending at every walking man(5 walking men per exercise).

    The following were the exercises:

    5-1 hand release burpees (hurpees)

    10-2 lunges

    20-12 merkins

    10-2 groiners

    20-12 air presses

    10-12 v-ups

    20-12 Russian twists

    50-10 lbcs

    10-2 monkey humpers

    5-1 hand release burpees (hurpees)

    Almost made it all the way around the running path but had to finish up with 2 line Indian run to the flag.

    COT, count off, name-o-rama, announcements, intentions and prayer.

    Thank you to the PAX for entertaining my workout.

    86

  • Respect is Hell and then the Clock Stops

    #TClaps to Hokey Pokey, Green Screen and Marlin: with PAX who’ve been at this mortal coil for longer than YHC, whose 57th BDay was yesterday.  Since his M has strongly urged YHC not to post in the gloom on the same day he does his slow weight training and since YHC has long ago figured out #MakingMHappyKeepsYHCHappy, YHC didn’t post on his BDay, so today was his BDay Q.  After his usual, crappy disclaimer, the PAX was off for a loop around the golfing parking lot to the Newman bandstand for

    COP1:

    • SSHs 57xIC (lots of mumblechatter: what’s they expect?)
    • Low Slow Squats 20xIC
    • Hill Billies 20xIC
    • Arm Circles 20xIC (one set forward, the other backwards

    Line up between the trees for an animal exposition: bear crawl to the first light, then 5 burpees, duck walk to the second, then 5 more burpees, inch worm to the third for another 5 burpees, gorilla hop to the fourth for 5 more burpees and crab walk to the fifth and last with yet another 5 burpees.

    Mosey to the soccer field, where with a little hiccup from Angie’s List the PAX was successfully able to split themselves into five groups.  Group One, Jump squats AMRAP; Group Two, merkins AMRAP; Group Three, Observations (like LBCs but holding the crunch for a three count, #TClaps for the Northshore PAX for introducing this to the Southshore) AMRAP; Group Four, pulses AMRAP; and Group Five, ten pullups on the soccer goal, five on each side.  Rinse and repeat.

    Mosey to the Audubon statue for an attempt at Dora.  While half the PAX was moseying around in front of the statue around the grass being waters, the other half was doing Dora’s work; flap-jack, etc..  Round One: 100 burpees; Round Two: 200 shoulder taps; Round Three was supposed to be 300 jump squats.  But YHC wasn’t too good at keeping track of time.  Even though Reluctant Yankee wasn’t around to #BustMyAss, YHC decided to cut Dora short so that the PAX could timely arrive at precisely 6:15 with not a second to spare.

    Thanks for letting this old guy lead.  It’ll be four years for him later this month, and he’s in better shape than he’s ever been in his life.  JV

  • Im a Virgin and this is my first time. April Fools, Fools.

    YCH was recovering from a loooong Hogs for the Cause weekend, sound asleep, when at 11 PM Yankee texted letting me know I had the Q in the morning. Somehow wires had been crossed and I had been under the assumption for weeks that my VQ was to be this Friday. Nope. I rose early Monday Morning and devised a plan recalling the dream I had that woke me at 2 AM and kept me up for an hour. In said dream YHC had lead the PAX through a beatdown but stepped into the latrine for a sec. Inside he was distracted by his Instagram feed and when he was done scrolling the time was 6:54 AM and the entire PAX had vanished with no COT. That shook me a little. Needless to say I was taking my VQ seriously.

    20 PAX assembled in the unusually late season cool gloom to greet me and after a brief disclamier we mosey’d to the grass near Exposition and Magazine.

    THE WARM UP

    • SSHx20
    • ACX10
    • RACX9 (Just to mess with Seaman)
    • WMx20
    • on you face for-
    • MCx20
    • Stay down. That means you Jingle Vader.
    • PPx20
    • PPx20
    • Merkinsx20

    Next we mosey’d to the rowbars and split into 4 groups.

    • Group 1 10 burpees
    • Group 2 Plank Jacks
    • Group 3 Squats
    • Group 4 Rowbar Pull Ups

    YHC then asked the PAX whether we should form 2 lines or one for a quick Indian Run to the fountain. 2 was the consensus so we took off in 1 very long Indian Run. Not april fools.

    AROD

    • YCH devised a clever idea for the next activity during the Indian Run. DORA spelled backward is AROD. DORA has only existed on the South end of the park until now. Flipped the spelling and the location. Clever, no? Muy. Anyway The Thang was to pair up and complete 3 exercises while your partner ran a loop around the side of the fountain area. I called some audibles. The first was to scratch 100 burpees. There is always Friday.
    • 100 Merkins
    • 200 Plank Jacks
    • 300 Dips (quickly modified to 100 after attempting post-merkin dips.

    After that we got in 2 lines and headed back South for a long half-assed Indian Run. Pulled over by the Prytania entrace to hit the grass and do some PAX choice Mary. I am sure I am remembering this wrong but here goes.

    • Reluctant Yankee- Low Country Crab (of course) (PAX eye roll)
    • Jingle Vader- Dying Cockroach.
    • Brown Bag- WW2 Situps
    • Nip Tuck- Might have been American Hammer?
    • Someone- LBC’s?
    • Bartman maybe Boxcutters?

    Finish up with Mary and wonder aloud about the time. Someone makes a cute remark so 10 burpees on your own. Another cute remark bring the total to 15. Not April Fooling today. Yankee did not do 15. Not April Fooling again.

    Mosey back to the flag with a sprint to finish out the last 200 yards. YHC pushed it a little early and flamed out before the finish. Might have been the self administered burpees. Might have been the 34 pounds of pork consumed over the weekend. Might have been the keg of beer. Probaly a little of all 3.

    Couple of minutes left so I have Brown Bag lead us in some Yoga during which he tells us all about how much better the view is when his personal Yoga instructer “Logan” is with him. Another collective PAX eyeroll.

    Countoff and Name-o-rama, not nicknames for God sake Tchip “Tchinkles” Roth. We welcomed Khakis who posted from some far away land. Feel free to tell me from where.

    Announcements-

    I tell everyone again this is my VQ. Apparently no one heard the first time. Everyone is surprised. Mostly due to the skill with which my Beat Down was dispensed but also due to the fact I have attend pretty religiously for 14 months and have slipped through the Q cracks.

    -Long, shadeless run at the Belle Chasse Navy Base “Need For Speed” 5k. Takes place 4/13. Static displays of aircraft and me in a heap at the end of the 10,000′ runway. Kenny Loggins “Danger Zone” will be blasted on repeat. Naval aviatiors will be wearing Ray-Bans, bluejeans and not much else playing sand volleyball. Peppa plans to buzz the tower and on and on.

    -Brown Bag sells beer and has new beer he is selling.

    -Speaking of beer, Urban South is having a YUGE 3 year anniversary 4/6. Lots of beer, crawfish and family friendly fun.

    -There may have been other which I have forgotten.

    Intentions are called, especially keeping Hawgcycle in our thoughts. Prayers are offered up thanking Sky Q for the ability to better ourselves and for the gift of our F3 Brotherhood.

    Thank yall for keeping me accountable and the opportunity to lead.

  • Fiat Lux

    Seven PAX convened for YHC’s virgin Q. The disclaimer was initially botched and we rudely cut off a biker so it was a rocky start.

    Alas, got the blood flowing along St. Charles for a few blocks before turning around for a warm-up in Cowen Circle:

    • SSH x 20
    • Windmills x 15
    • Mountain climbers x 25
    • Slow merkins x 15

    Next, headed out on a mosey, missed the originally planned turn, and eventually arrived at the Tulane ROTC pull-up bars. There we:

    • Round 1: Pull-ups to failure + 10 merkins + 15 jumping air squats
    • Round 2: Pull-ups to at least half of Round 1 number + 10 merkins + 15 jumping air squats
    • Round 3: Pull-ups to failure + 10 merkins + 15 jumping air squats

    Then we continued on a mosey to the LBC Quad where the University had graciously set-up spotlights for us; it was a sight to behold:

    Let there be light!

    In honor of Bones and my beloved San Francisco Giants beating the Dodgers last night, we played “baseball” under the lights, performing different exercises at each “base” of the diamond:

    • Home plate: 9 burpees
    • 1st base: 18 Nolan Ryans
    • 2nd base: 27 jumping lunge squats
    • 3rd base: 36 LBCs

    Multiples of nine since it’s both eponymous with my namesake and baseball games have nine innings. Bases were longer than MLB standards at about 40-50 yards apart; we did two rounds.

    Mosey back towards towards our AO with an initial pitstop at the Loyola Rec Center garage.

    Side note: does this garage have a name? If not, I’m going with Freret Street Summit or Wolfpack Pinnacle. To be discussed at our next F2 event…

    Nonethless, ran up the stairs, performed a round of Mary at the top with each of the 7 PAX leading their favorite ab workout, and headed back down the stairs.

    Continued the mosey homeward with the final stop being WPM for 15 decline merks on the first ramp followed by 15 incline merks. Popped over to the stairwell, did a quick up-and-down the Mountain, and made it back to the flag with 30 seconds to spare.

    Special shoutout to the fine gentlemen of this morning’s Tsunami (namely Mariah) for enduring my horrendous navigational skills and poor sense of timing…

  • 40 – a.k.a. The Rudy Special

    With all the new NOLA PAX members that have taken the Daily Red Pill and joined our ranks, there are so many great workouts they have missed since the inception of F3 NOLA. One of my favorites at Okwata is the 40! Thank you, Rudy! Other epic beatdowns such as the H8 and Elevens with Burpees at Okwata are always crowd pleasers. Since the Army Corps of Engineers raised the height of the lake levee, this AO is like no other in the city. As a side note, you can also thank Mayor Cantrell and former Mayor Landrieu for keeping the grass well manicured over the years.

    WARMUP

    After my disclainer, we do a quick mosey around the Mardi Gras fountain with side shuffles, high knees and butt kicks and head over to the levee. The space between the sidewalk and the bottom of the levee is very spongelike and lumpy so watch your step.

    THE THANG

    As I give the instructions, I hear some groans from the veterans and get some puzzled looks from the newcomers as they process the task ahead of them. It’s pretty simple. Run up and over the levee 40 times and perform 10 exercises 40 times. The sequence of the beatdown is as follows:

    Burpees, Plank Jacks – 10 sec break

    Side Lunges, Catalina Wine Mixers – 20 sec break

    Supermans (Red Sun/Yellow Sun), Shoulder Taps – 30 sec break

    Reverse Crunches, Bonnie Blairs – 40 sec break

    Merkins, WW2 Situps / Wife Pleasers

    It’s 6:13am and we head back to the Freedom Hammer

    COUNTOFF, NAMERAMA AND COT

    Honored to lead all the HIM (High Impact Men) today and grateful for your friendship, camaraderie, and accountability. Prayers for those fighting cancer and those who have lost loved ones! Lord help us be the leaders we were destined to be for our wives, children, and community!

  • Techno-Free Beatdowns

    YHC knows he’s old school, old fashioned, and just plain old.  #RespectHasItsDrawbacks.  For the COT, he utterly–and proudly–failed in his effort to record the names of the 28!!! PAX who posted in the gloom.  Even with Mariah’s held (#TClaps), it was hopeless.  Thank God our beatdowns are (generally) techno-free.

    With a quick disclaimer (and YHC’s failure yet again to ask whether there were any FNGs, of which there were none), the PAX was off to the soccer fields in front of Audubon for the first COP:

    • SSHs 25xIC
    • Imperial Walkers 25xIC
    • Grass Grabbers 25xIC
    • Merkins 25xIC
    • Low Slow Squats 25xIC (with a lagniappe of 5 burpees OYO in the middle)

    Mosey over to the levee for some Elevens: ten burpees down to one at the bottom of the levee, and one jump squat up to ten at the top.

    Then mosey over to the Audubon statue for some Dora 1-2-3: PAX paired up for 100 dips, 200 squats and 300 LBCs.

    Then mosey back to one of the soccer fields (to get our of ears’ reach of the Clipboard barking out numbers and orders to the hapless Wallets in Tights) for a quick round of Mary:

    • American Hammer 20xIC
    • Dying Cockroach 20xIC (keep feet up for next round)
    • Flutter Kicks 20xIC (keep feet up for next round)
    • Hello Dolly 20xIC
    • Crunchy Frog 20xIC

    Mosey back to the flag for COT and YHC’s complete inability to work either a video or audio stream on his cell phone.  There was a PAX of 28, but YHC (with the help of other PAX, @TClaps) could recall all but one.  So apologies to that one PAX, who gets credit from the SkyQ even though he’s anonymous (at least for now) to us mortals.


  • 2 is 1

    It was a cold 40 so a PSA from Brown Bag Below 57 longs sleeves, below 50 pants and hat.

    Quick mosey to the Zoos mud field and warm up of SSH, Mountain Climbers, Parker Peters.

    We then formed into a line and did BLIMPS 5,10,15,… to the parking lot and back. As a group finished our squats we headed closer to the Zoo from some DORA.

    The DORA 2 is 1;

    100 Decline Mericans w/ Shoulder Taps (2 is 1 for taps) Thank you Tinkles!

    200 Power Ups Left and Right (2 legs are 1)

    300 Russian Twist (2 is 1)

    Quick 20 dips then back to the flag or final minute of LBCs, Box Cutters, and Pickle Pounders.