F3 New Orleans

Tag: Paradiddle

  • Coupon Love – from Goose

    YHC was too lazy to unload the coupons from the truck after yesterday, so we used them again this morning. A lot.
    PAX: Paradox, Paradiddle, Elmer’s, Tighty Whitey, and Goose

    Warmup: SSH, WM, AC, IW, SL, all while staring at the ominous pile of blocks on top of the hill.

    Thang 1: Hazy 8’s
    Partnered up at the bottom of the hill for three rounds of the following:

    -Round 1: Partner 1 did 8-count body builders until Partner 2 rifled carried his block up the hill, did 12 overhead presses, and carried it back down. Flapjack.

    -Round 2: Partner 1 did figure 8’s (swing coupon around and through the legs in a figure 8, switching hands; like with a basketball, but it’s heavy concrete with sharp corners–many jokes about clearance), while Partner 2 ran to the cross at the top of the other hill and completed 10 genuflections before running back. Flapjack.

    -Round 3: Partner 1 did Dr. W’s (8-count ab exercise–look it up), while Partner 2 did Block and Bear (bear crawl while dragging the block between the legs/arms every few steps) up the hill and ran down. Flapjack.

    Thang 2: Indian Running with a Rifle

    PAX lined up for an Indian Run, but the man in front kept a block overhead in rifle carry position until the last man in line did 5 merkins and caught up to relieve him. It was great. We’ll definitely revisit that one.

    Thang 3: Bridge of Coupon Hate, Tunnel of Coupon Love

    -Round 1: PAX on their backs, shoulder to shoulder, handed all five blocks over, conveyor belt style, back and forth a few times.

    -Round 2: PAX got shoulder to shoulder in plank position and pulled the coupons through the tunnel with one hand, and then back through with the other. Rinse and Repeat three times.

    We filled the last 5 minutes with Colt 45’s, Bolt 45’s (15 curls/goblet squats respectively from mid to high, 15 low to mid, and 15 low to high) and some Mary: gas pumps, LBC’s, wife pleasers, Australian sweat angels, and Scuba Steve’s.

    COT with lots of details on the upcoming St. Vincent 500 (Aug. 12-13 at The Stage) and lots of sizable prayer intentions. Tighty prayed us out.
    It was an awesome experience breaking these guys into some new coupon work and grinding them out together. Thanks for joining, fellas!

    See You in the Gloom,
    Goose

  • What time is it? Hill:30 – from Goose

    A solid five PAX climbed the hill on another beautiful morning at Lumen Christi, awkwardly quiet at first about YHC’s choice of a smedium Superman shirt (with velcro cape). Why? Getting dressed in the dark? Delusions of grandeur? No, just cuz it’s stupid, and it might distract a little from what we were about to endure.

    Warmup: the usual faves–SSH, WM, AC, cherry pickers, IW, self-love

    Thang 1: 30’s
    YHC had some exercise ideas, all utilizing the hill, but we needed a theme. The date was 4-26-22, so for the first Thang, we just added 4 + 26 to get 30. That’ll do!
    Round 1, nonstop: 15 Hand Release Merkins at the bottom of the hill, then run over and 15 at the other side; 15 jump squats at the bottom, 15 on the other side; and 15 big boy situps on each side.
    Starting to love the hill! So, Round 2, nonstop: 10 Hurpees (hand-release burpees) at the bottom, 10 at the top, and 10 on the other side; 10 Bonnie Blairs at the top, 10 at the bottom, and 10 back at the top; then 10 crunchy frogs at the other side, at the top, and at the bottom.

    Thang 2: 52’s
    Now that we felt intimately connected to the hill, we chose to remain there and added the number of the year to the total (4 + 26 + 22 = 52), partnered (and throupled) up to complete the following, Dora fashion:
    52 Hurpees
    52 Step-ups on the picnic bench (2:1)
    52 shoulder/toe taps (plank and tap each shoulder and each toe = 1)
    While Partner 1 hammered away at these reps, Partner 2 ran up the hill backward and back down forward (though after the hurpees, we switched to running forward up and down).

    Mary: 20 leg raises, 20 wife pleasers, and 30 penguins.
    The cape remained velcroed in place throughout the workout providing many performance enhancing benefits despite early mumblechatter suggesting otherwise.

    COT and Paradiddle prayed us out. Lots to pray for, and lots to be grateful for. Thanks for posting, fellas, and for pushing hard together!

    See You in the Gloom,
    Goose

  • Lieutenant FNG – from Goose

    YHC pulled up to Lumen Christi this morning to a crowded hill crest–Cardinal brought three FNG’s who were excitedly awaiting the flag planting, and, I think, expecting that they’d probably be able to outperform Cardinal and whatever other old guys who might show up (ha!). The three young’uns are two seminarians and one prospective seminarian, and they certainly showed some interior fortitude this morning by sticking with it the whole time with smiles on their (sweating, dirty) faces.

    Warmup: side straddle hops, windmills, arm circles, cherry pickers, imperial walkers, self-love, and 50 Moroccan Night Clubs IC (waiting for Paradiddle to join–it took a while).

    Thang 1: Lieutentant Dans
    I had to ask the young PAX (only Picadilly is as old as YHC) if they knew who Lt. Dan was. Thankfully, these fellas are cultured, and they were able to pull out the famous quote immediately (“Lt. Dan, you ain’t got no legs.”)
    We moseyed to the bench by the small pond, and starting there, moved toward the last bench on the shore of the big lake using the following mode of transportation: 1 squat to 2 lunge walk steps (2 squats, 4 lunge steps, 3 squats, 6 lunge steps, etc.). It felt successful given the sincere statements of hatred directed toward YHC as we neared the finish line.

    Thang 2: Bench Work
    Gave the legs a break as we squeezed seven medium to large men onto three benches for two sets of 20 freak nasties, 15 irkins, 10 derkins. The form on the dips may have been compromised a bit for the FNG threesome due to the formidable wingspan of the soon to be Uncle Rico.

    Thang 3: F3 Poker
    Figured we’d give the Houma guys a taste of the official F3 Deck of Death–the more we can connect them to the bigger picture of F3, the better! So, YHC dealt 5-card stud, and the winning hand was the workout set for the whole PAX. Got through two hands, and was able to introduce them to Monkey Humpers, Smurf jacks, Chuck Norris merkins, Ranger Merkins, and what 100 side-straddle-hops feel like after doing Lt. Dans.
    For the second of two hands (both won by Picadilly, interestingly), Jokers and Dueces were wild, and the winner included a Joker, which YHC explained should be assigned a ridiculous exercise. So, we ascended the hill via crawl bear (backward bear crawl). The key was to keep the flag in sight between your legs so you don’t veer off, take small steps, and pretend you’re anywhere else but crawling backward up a hill.

    Finished with enough time for some solid Mary: Crunchy Frogs, leg raises, and wife pleasers (since they had been mentioned before as the second most dignified exercise, monkey humpers being number one).

    Count off, name off, and we provided new identities to Donut Day, Econoline, and Uncle Rico–welcome fellas! These guys did a great job pushing themselves for their first beatdown, and we’re looking forward to what God has in store for them!

    See You In the Gloom,
    Goose

  • Providence and Classics for the New Guys – from Goose

    YHC was excited about the potential for record breaking numbers at the Houma location, Lumen Christi, including a unique FNG: priest #2 for the Bayou PAX! (Fr. J.D. Matherne, pastor of St. Hilary in Raceland will heretofore be known as Cutthroat!). However, at 5:45am, with what sounded like a Category 3 outside the house, YHC was scheming hard about how to boost morale in the howling wind, the pounding deluge of rain, and lightning popping all around. I knew that with this relatively new crew, we couldn’t break one of the major principles of F3 this early in the game, so gear was donned and prayers were said as YHC prepped to walk out into this mother of a storm.
    Thankfully, things changed quickly, and not only did the rain let up, but the sky cleared and revealed a gorgeous sky (and eventually a full rainbow!). Even the ground was relatively dry (besides some slick patches of clover, which left some PAX eating turf when bear crawling down the hill). Morale was extremely high with little to no effort as the PAX continued pouring in for this young location. Ultimately, there were 8, a record, and the warmup commenced:

    Warmup: all IC–20 Side Straddle Hops, 20 WindMills, 15 Arm Circles (each way), 15 Moroccan Night Clubs (shimmy included), 20 Self-Love, 20 Imperial Walkers, 10 High Knees, 10 Butt Kicks

    Thang 1: Dora 1, 2, 3
    YHC wanted to make sure these guys get some solid experience of the classics, so we started with a standard partner Dora wherein partners split 100 Hand Release Merkins, 200 Apolo Ohno’s, and 300 American Hammers. For the first 100, partner 2 ran backward up the hill (Nur) and forward back down. For the second, it was run up and bear crawl down (clover is slick!); and for the third, crab walk up and run down.
    At first, YHC inadvertently looked pretty smart to Enron and a few others knowing Ohno’s middle name, but then Cutthroat ruined it by revealing that for a decade, everyone only ever heard all three names (Apolo Anton Ohno). But, YHC turned the tables in the next Thang (Cutthroat, you don’t know NOTHIN’!!)

    Thang 2: Double Song Power!
    Moseyed to the hill with the cross and pulled out “Flower” by Moby–hold Al Gore for every “Sally down,” and only come up for every “Sally up”. It’s a thigh burner, and a favorite of YHC, especially for new guys–an added element is that if they can guess the lyrics, we stop. They never do. FNG hopes are dashed on the rocks of ignorance, and it’s nobody’s fault but their own.

    Song 2: Chumbaburpee! Another favorite since it’s one of the rare times that burpees are a yearned for break from something unexpectedly worse. Side straddle hops for the duration of the song, and burpees for every “I get knocked down, but I get up again.” Side straddle hops for that long are pretty torturous at the end of a long workout, so flopping down to the ground almost feels good. Except at the end (20 burpees in a row).

    Classic Indian Run back to the flag for some Mary: in an effort to continue to grow the PAX’s knowledge of the Exicon, everything with a ridiculous name gets priority. All IC x15: Crunchy Frogs, LBC’s, Wife Pleasers, J-Lo’s.

    COT and Elmer’s prayed us out. Welcome, Cutthroat, and thanks be to God for a gorgeous morning and a great group of men!

    See You in the Gloom,
    Goose

  • Bringin’ em Kids to Church – from Goose

    For only the third ever beatdown in the Houma area, a record five PAX gathered, anticipatorily subdued, in the gloom on Tuesday morning on the top of the hill at Lumen Christi. It didn’t take long to get the mumblechatter going, though, once Paradiddle showed up in a fly tanktop in sub 60 degree weather. YHC sadly lamented all the tanktops his M talked him into tossing not long into marriage, and then commenced the warmup.
    PAX: Tighty Whitey, Elmer’s, Picadilly, Paradiddle, Goose

    Warmup: (all in cadence) 20 side straddle hops, 20 windmills, 10 arm circles (fore, then back), 15 cherry pickers, 20 self-love (Michael Phelps), and 20 Imperial Walkers.

    Theme: Taking little ‘uns to church.

    Thang 1: From the parking lot
    Short mosey to the truck where official F3 coupons (stenciled cinder blocks) awaited. Partnered up to become married couples (or a throuple in one case) working to get the kids and their gear from the parking lot into the church.
    Partner 1 farmer carried two coupons (baby carrier, diaper bag, what have you) while the other did five big boi situps (bigger kids tying shoes, falling down, etc.) before running to catch up and swapping with Partner 1. Once arriving at our destination on the other side of the lake, we realized we got the service time wrong and it was already 3/4 of the way over, so rinse and repeat back to the top of the hill (the next closest church), but this time dying cockroaches instead of situps (kids on the ground throwing tantrums).

    Thang 2: Taking loud kids to the back, and forth
    Down by Souby Hall, just outside the huge windows for all inside to watch (just like at church when you have to leave with a screaming child), PAX completed a set of 7’s. At one end, started with 6 flutter kicks (tantrum) before backward-lunge-walking (genuflecting to the altar) to the other side for 1 goblet squat (squat with coupon held under the chin, like trying to quiet a 30 pound baby with sharp, concrete corners). Then, lunge walk forward (genuflecting to the altar) and upon arrival, completed 5 flutters (next tantrum) and repeating with 2 goblet squats on the other end and so on until 1 flutter and 6 squats.

    Thang 3: Sporadic Prayer
    In the same area, PAX completed a Jack Webb. (In full transparency, YHC took some delight in what seemed to these newer PAX to be a quick, harmless ascending ladder of 1 merkin and 4 air presses starting at 1:4 and ending with 10:40. I mean, how heavy can air be?) It was like the age-old pattern of getting down and dealing with squirmy kids, and then standing and praising the Lord for a few seconds before needing to get low to quell more squirmage. Needless to say, air is very, very heavy, and praising the Lord takes some serious effort sometimes.

    Thang 4: Back to the vehicle
    Rinse and repeat Thang 1, but 10 Freddy Mercuries on the way out (2 is 1), and 5 burpees on the way back. Finished at exactly 45 minutes, grateful for the chance to finally put the kids (I mean coupons) down and go home to take off those darn high heels and put our feet up. It was hard, but it was worth it!

    Thanks for joining, fellas, and for seeing the value in pushing hard on a Tuesday morning!
    See You in the Gloom,
    Goose