YHC arrived early and knocked out a 20-minute pre-jog to loosen up before the mayhem commenced. Vagabond was spotted cycling pre-beatdown — clearly training for something that doesn’t involve merkins.

At 6:29, Heisenberg asked, “Will we be moving much?”
He was cold. “Sure.” I wanted to at least warm his hopes.

We took the scenic route through the parking lot and alongside the Great Lawn to the Peristyle, enough to chase off the chill. Vagabond joined us after changing out of his singlet and into his mudgear in the middle of Dreyfous Dr.

Warm-O-Rama: ASG, GG, IW, PP, Crab Cakes, SSH

Then we moseyed to the parking lot west of the Great Lawn for what can only be described as… fun.

Thang 1 – The Stripe Series

1- Bear Crawl Ladder
Bear crawl to first line, 3 merkins. Crawl bear back.
Then to the second line for 6 merkins… up to the fifth line for 15.
Revit quickly realized leather gloves aren’t just for Harley riders. Always bring the b**ch mittens, fellas.

2- Lunge, Jump, Jack, Crunch
At each stripe — 2 Jump Squats, 2 Plank Jacks, 2 LBCs.
Increase by 2 each line, up to 16, 16, 16.
And yes, Vagabond, LBCs, not BBSUs — that’s what I said (probably).

3- Partner Broad Jump
One PAX broad jumps two stripes while the other does flutter kicks.
Switch. Go 3 rounds.
Legs burning.

That’s all you got?
Nope.

Thang 2 – The Cone Gauntlet

Moved to the front of the Great Lawn.
Sprint to far cone (~40 yards) → do exercise for set reps → backwards mosey to near cone (~20 yards) → keep doing same exercise until Q calls recover.
1. 10 Burpees
2. 20 Merkins
3. 30 Squats
4. 40 BBSUs
5. 50 Mountain Climbers (2 is 1, in cadence)

Thang 3 – The Corners of the Lawn

Mosey to northeast corner:
• 15x Hip Slaps IC
• 15x Shoulder Taps IC
• 10x Tempo Merkins IC… ouch

Lieutenant Dan to northwest corner:
• 12x Mayhem Merkins IC

Backwards Mosey to southwest corner:
• 8x Mayhem (or Vagabond) Burpees – 14-count

Mosey to southeast corner:
• 6x Mayhem (or Vagabond) 8-Count Body Builders – 16-count

Heisenberg suggested adding one more move make it a nice round 20-count. Whistlepig declined and said the suggestion box was closed.

Thang 4 – Big Bang

Circle up in the middle of the Great Lawn.
Hold plank until YHC called an exercise and rep count, then explode up and perform it.
Lawn was soft; shoulders were not. Backsides wet.

Thang 5 – Mary with a Twist

Circle up again. One PAX bear crawls around the circle as the timer while the others do a core exercise.
The circle size seemed to expand or contract depending on who was bear crawling — looking at you, Vagabond.

COT

Mosey to the flag.
Announcements made.
Intentions shared.
Prayed us out.

PSA: Don’t forget to set your clocks back tonight — because nobody wants to be that guy showing up at 5:30 for no reason.

Naked Moleskin
• Cafe du Monde is calling post-Mothership — let’s bring that tradition back. (Just remember: they don’t take tap.)
• We got the perfect mix of laughs and hard work — the exact recipe for an F3 Saturday.
• Couldn’t ask for better weather or better company. More company would have been more better.