F3 New Orleans

Category: New Orleans

  • The Fools of April – from Reluctant Yankee

    1/2 dozen pax posted for a workout meant to spark the metabolism enough to digest the anticipated breaking of fast at Panolas post beatdown. Quite a few pax out of rotation due to Hawgs for the Cause.
    I like to keep things moving so a quick jog over the base of WPM.
    COP 1: SSH, Paul Imperial Walkers, Mtn Climbers and Roaches x 20
    Run up to the 4th floor – plank using the wall for leverage.
    Leg lifts right and left from the captains chair
    COP 2: walking plank using wall x 20, walking plank with legs using wall x 20
    Run to the 6th FLOOR – use the park stop aka curb aka Almonaster knew the name of it
    COP 3: to do MERKS round the clock x 12 facing 12 oclock, 3oclock, 6 oclock, 9 and then finished
    Run to the top of Wolfpack Mtn
    COP 4: Fire hydrants x 20 each leg, bird dogs x 20 each side, Lil baby obliques left and right x 20
    DO A LAP ON THE STAIRWELL – down and then back up
    COP 5: Plank Jacks x 20, Jlos x 20, Shoulder taps x 20 and Freddies mercurys x 20
    DO A LAP ON THE STAIRWELL – down then back up
    COP 6: Nolan Ryans and Hip dips each side x 20, Low Country Crabs
    Back down the stairs to the bench alley
    Here will did a quick 20 dips then a slow cadence 20 dips.
    Back to flag. Glad to get a solid beatdown in with these guys.

  • Blindman’s Dodgeball – from Fast Tax

    17 PAX showed up in the gloom at Rock City.

    Warmups consisted of Abe Vigodas, Grass Grabbers, Toy Soldiers, and Hairy Rockettes

    After “medium” rock selections, we lined up in the gloom for the first event, Fee-Fi-Fo-Fum.
    We lined up and, trying not to hit each other and incur 30 burpees, we threw our rocks as far as we could and broad jumped the remaining distance to the rock. Rinse and repeat until we YHC said stop – about 50 yds.

    Still bearing the brunt of PAX chit-chat and aware that most PAX ignored the suggestion to pick a smooth rock, YHC went with Hairburners. This involved PAX lining up in a plank and then pushing the rock (both hands on the rock) across the ground until we returned to the starting point.

    Rock-Lift Wife Pleasers were next.
    Holding the upward wife pleaser position, PAX overhead lifted their rocks for 20 reps IC, followed by several more reps for PAX chatter (thanks Fracsac).

    With 20 mins remaining, it was time for Blindman’s Dodgeball.
    Using the bottom half of the unlit tennis court, Four PAX were designated throwers and were restricted to the bluish-green area of the court while rest of the PAX had to stay in the red areas. When a PAX got hit, he would step off and one of four exercises (10 Burpees, 10 8 Ct Body Builders, 20 BBS, 10 Pullups), then he would return and take over as a ball thrower. The reps were eventually cut in half to speed things along.

    At 6:15, quick mosey to the flag for COT.
    Coffeteria at PJs followed.
    Thanks for the fellowship!

    SYITG

  • The Emperor’s New Clothes – from Goose

    Before a trip to Goodwill, family and friends will often make a stop by the Dawson house since we have kids of pretty much every size (male and female), so getting a bag of gently used clothes is a relatively frequent occurrence. And, since the decision to utilize the Animal shirt a couple of months ago, YHC doesn’t leave the pile of unwanted clothes destined for the actual thrift store to leave the house without choosing one or two items that might make their way into the F3 Thibodaux structure (or just derail a Q or two).
    For this morning’s Tuesday Tuff beatdown, YHC, the newly crowned King FartSack, chose some form-fitting leggings with a stylish black and gray brushstroke design along with an open concept, black and white striped tank top with knotted straps to highlight the clavicles. A post-beatdown review of this ensemble will be given later in the backblast.

    Warmups of the usual followed by a bumper mosey, then Paradox revealed that he firmly resolved to keep the aquamarine Euro tank top well lodged within the structure of F3 Thibodaux by taking off his jacket. He was wearing said tank top and had stenciled both the front and back with his/Enron’s overactive F3 stencil. I felt known, appreciated, and no longer alone on this weird journey. Bug spray was needed for all the exposed flesh.

    The first Thang was two laps around the track:
    1. Bear crawl across in front of the stage, side shuffle up to the other end, bear crawl across back toward the parking lot, and side shuffle back to start.
    2. Same, but carioca instead of side shuffle.
    (YHC remained in front so the PAX might appreciate the functionality of the leggings.)

    After stopping for a needed 10-count, we moseyed to the start of Rich Man’s Loop for a classic Fartlek–jog three light posts, sprint one. Smooth, again, showed the fruits of posting multiple times a week and the wisdom learned from the Northshore legends over the weekend. (And, FYI: sprinting with just leggings was awesome–like the ancient Olympics, but without the thigh friction.)

    The last thang was a repeat of the burpee timer from a couple of months ago. While one man did 15 burpees, station 1 did non-stop(ish) monkey humpers, station 2 did merkins, and station 3 did wife pleasers. After all four PAX did burpees, we moved on to round two where station 1 was mountain climbers, station 2 was jump squats, and station three was gas pumps.
    With only four men, this ended about five minutes sooner than expected, so YHC ran to the truck to retrieve the Deck of Death for a round of F3 poker. Enron won the hand with three nines, so we completed the exercises on his five cards (100 flutters, 19 Chuck Norris merkins, 90 second plank, 19 high knees, and another bear crawl across the front of the stage).

    With three minutes remaining for Mary, we burnt out whatever remained in the upper abs with a lot of crunchy frogs, heels to heaven, and slow penguins.

    COT with some solid prayer intentions (especially for a big week for Enron and YJ) and Paradox prayed us out.

    Clothing review:
    Shirt–mix of Richard Simmons, Gene Simmons, and a mime from the 70’s. Only difference from being shirtless was the thin layer of protective cloth during Mary.
    Leggings–high rating on functionality, but as Thibodaux lies neither on the East Coast nor the West Coast, they will find their way back into the bag. (Also, if the shirt front hadn’t been as long as it was, we would have definitely been moving into new territory as an F3 community.)

    SYTIG,
    Goose

  • Dare You to Move – from Paradox

    F3 Thibodaux tradition dictates that the Holy Week beatdowns crank the intensity on a few levels. On Saturday YHC jumped on an empty Q slot , laid a blueprint, and when I took a step back it was …well, we’ll just say it was a little too heavy. I thought “well I’ll just let that simmer and maybe the lightness will find a way.”
    I then talked with Cardinal (our EH specialist) on Sunday who told me about a new potential FNG he knows from the office of parish support.
    “This guy is perfect “ he said. “He checks all the boxes, Lives in the settlement , natural leader, strong faith, tall and used to be athletic. Was actually in the NBA D league until he had 47 kids. Best known for telling guys who fouled out that he would pray for them. His wife says he just needs some friends and a hobby ya know”

    Perfect ! This is just what we need for Monday. So I routed our warmup mosey to his house and we took a 0.8 mile run to start the beatdown , dropped off the F3 Thibodaux FNG brochure and patted our selves on the back . Mission accomplished!

    Just remember that ole saying kids …Hell hath no fury like a Yankee Jeaux scorned !

    Duke!! It’s Holy Week
    Roll the footage !

    Abbreviated warmup so we had time for our mission.

    Thang 1
    Leave Jerusalem-Then Return

    After returning from a successful FNG visit we Moseyed to Richman Loop on the straight away

    Return with our burdens , shoulder them together

    1 Pax lunge walk with ole hickory to a cone about 20 yards apart
    Rest of Pax mosey ahead to next cone to begin an exercise with lunge as timer.

    SSH
    Merkins
    Coupon OHP
    Med Ball Slams

    Solid cardio/muscle mix here and the Temple cleansing slamball is the best therapy on the market.
    We discussed Whoop/F3 partnerships and Enron showed us all proper Ole Hickory lunge form. A bold move with sheriff Form present but no sirens needed today.

    Mosey back to Stage with our burdens for a few songs to get us in the right mind for Holy Week.

    While I’m waiting -John Waller
    Donkey Kicks in waiting
    Plank for rest

    Dare you to move -switch foot
    Step ups
    Incline merkins on Dare

    COT and Enron Prayed Us Out

    Special intentions for the family of the local officer killed in the line of duty.

    NMM

    Roughly 20 months ago I was home from the wellness center telling my M I was once again “done with the gym”
    I couldn’t sit in an air conditioned building on the treadmill another minute watching reruns of Supernatural then do two reps of bench press and head home. I could do the workout DVDs again but that felt stale. Just so much missing . I was really stuck.

    Fast forward to April 3 2023

    At 5:15 this morning I met 4 other men while wearing a women’s small tank top after enlisting another man to also wear women’s clothing so we could run to another man’s house and enshrine him as King FartSack (which is only humorous because he’s our fearless leader and directly or indirectly he EH’d us all and never misses) plant a sign, take selfies and run back and that was a “warmup”!

    All these men I consider brothers who would be there for me or my family at moments notice.
    All this , from one of these men who made a single phone call to share this gift. This small gesture , a phone call and an invite, truly changed the course of my life and
    I’m constantly reminded that we have these opportunities daily. One smile, one invite, one shared story can be the spark for someone’s dwindling fire.
    The task for myself and our pax this week is to lean into the gospels message, let it transform you and let God lead you into those opportunities for connection and service.

    Dare you to move

    SYITG
    PDox

  • Q Delegator – from Vagabond

    6 pax took turns Qing 8 minutes apiece + 5 at the end

  • Down Here, it’s Our Time: A Story of Revolution, Nerds, and Kumquats – from Yankee Joe

    Over the course of history, man has always been restless, chafing under any force that threatens his most sacred right: Freedom.

    We’ve seen the proletariat rise up against Louis XIV in France, the Bolsheviks tear down the republic to establish communist Russia, and American colonists rail against the tyranny of taxation without representation. Most recently, there’s trouble down on the bayou that includes Bluetooth factions and wayward Geese flying north for the winter.

    Though history points to a series of causes that lead up to these revolutionary movements, there are usually a couple key moments that trigger the tipping point.

    Perhaps, after years of schisms, history will cite the spark that ignited the Great Rebellion of F3 Thibodaux. Maybe it was leadership deviating from the vision. Maybe it was leadership sowing seeds of division between competing AO’s. Or maybe it was the moment leadership demanded full grown men (seeking fraternity and exercise) to wear women’s clothing.

    Of course, it could be just a function of a college professor desperately trying to maintain some shred of professional decorum in front of PAX that also happen to be his students. Though that professionalism bar is admittedly low, somehow rocking a women’s aqua athletic tank top – with a single euro trash strip in the back – seems…I dunno…a little like credibility suicide.

    Indeed, Live Oak historians will say that I am a liar, but history is written by those who have hanged heroes. Who can say where the road goes? Where the day flows? Only time.

    In our modern era, we see this gross abuse of power best personified in Hollywood. Namely, the varsity letter jacket wearing jock of the 80s and 90s. YHC showed up to the Peltch at 6:29 to find Enron and Paradox most likely planning a beatdown for two. YHC hopped out the minivan with BAPS, a Cindy, and his very own letter jacket. It looked to be a tenacious trio of varsity prowess, brotiful and stUdfast.

    Warmarama: the usual stuff, made more satisfying when, per Enron’s prediction, French Horn tore into the parking lot five minutes late. His presence would be greatly appreciated, as the Horn dismantled YHCs trivia, thus saving the PAX 31 burpees at the end.

    The Thang

    – Mosey to treehouse, nur to stations
    – After each song, sprint to treehouse (approx 100 yards), nur back
    – Complete exercise at station, all 30 reps

    Stations in 30s
    – Squat butterflies with bricks
    – Hold Al Gore, Punch ups with bricks (2:1)
    – Coupon overhead press
    – Groiners

    –———
    Songs

    Song 1
    The Breakfast Club
    Jock: Andrew Clark
    Played by: Emilio Estevez
    Song: Don’t you forget about me
    Exercise: Burpees on “don’t, down, and la,la,la”
    Ssh or IWs in between

    Song 2
    Varsity Blues
    Lance Harbor
    Paul walker
    There goes my hero
    Bird dogs (alternating)
    Chilcutt PPs on refrain

    Song 3
    Back to the future
    Biff Tannen
    Thomas Wilson
    Roll with me Henry
    Burpee on every “roll”
    Bobby Hurley’s otherwise

    Song 4
    Revenge of the Nerds
    Frederick Aloysius palowaski
    Donald Gibb
    One foot in Front of the Other
    One leg hops
    Bonnie Blairs on refrain

    Song 5
    Grease
    Danny Zuko
    John Travolta
    Summer nights
    Pickle pounder when Danny sings
    J los when Sandy sings
    Chilcutt plank jacks when both sing
    Catalinas on chorus

    Max Heart rate Song
    It is Well (with my soul)
    Burpees on “well, soul, God, Christ”

    Namorama and French Horn prayed us out.

    Gentlemen, I write this as my last backblast for the Thibodaux PAX. I’ve kept it to myself, but my M and I are embarking on a new journey. As a former account manager at Google and Yahoo, Rebecca has accepted a job with Amazon HQ in Seattle. It’s an opportunity she can’t pass up.

    For me, as some of you may already know, I have a somewhat random passion for farming. Nothing like new beginnings to make one take a risky life plunge. That said, I’ve found a job on a small kumquat farm that specializes in organic kumquat products such as juices, jams, and face creams. It’s obviously a huge change, but I’m really excited. The name of the farm is Kumquat May. So clever…check it out. One of my jobs will include selling kumquat of the month subscriptions. Hope you’ll think of using us for some of your holiday gift ideas. Unfortunately, we don’t have much lead time, so we’re moving the family by end of April. It’s been a huge honor and pleasure getting to know each of you. I’ll be around for a few more beatdowns.

    SYITG,

    Yankee Jeaux

  • Around the Cones – from Thighs

    Today’s workout we used 6 cones to supplement the Grind.

    We started the beat down with a warmup:

    Mosey around the block
    15x Jumping Jacks
    7x Windmills
    7x Cherry Pickers
    10x Sun Gods (each direction)
    7x Merkins
    7x In Tempo Merkins
    7x Peter Parkers
    7x Squats
    7x In Tempo Tempo Squats

    Then we Mosey-ed to the parking lot to do 5 rounds of a Cone Workout:
    6 stations
    5x Merkin Jacks
    5x Merkin PopUps
    5x Spider Merkins
    5x Merkin Extensions
    5x Burpee Lunges
    5x Frog Jump Burpees

    Round 1: Run Across
    2: Bear Crawl
    3: Broad Jumps
    4: Lunges
    5:Murder Bunnies

    Even though we went really fast thru the Cone Workout, it still took most of the time.

    We finished the Cone Workout with a set of Achey-Legs:
    2x on a 4 count
    -Jumping Lunge x2
    -Squat
    -Scissor Jump

    We ended the workout with a Ab Ring of Fire
    10x Ab X-Extensions
    10x Backstrokes
    Plank 1 min
    10x Plank Wide Pike Ups
    10x Low plank wide pike ups

    We closed out with the usual close out, sending us off with a prayer. #Praying for those affected in Nashville.

    Also, shout out to @ShortBus, he was injured during this workout. 🙁

    Looking forward to next time!

  • April Foolishness – from Kenna Brah

    A rare and last minute appearance by YHC. So you know me to be unconventional, right?

    Well here was the warm up:
    Good Morning Mountain Man Poopers
    Imperial Walkers
    Simple horizontal twists
    Hot diggity dynamic downward dog cobras
    Multi Variant variable cadence SSH

    Foolish right? Why? Bring up examples if foolishness and what might appear foolish but actually results in innovation.

    Then mosey to the greatest lawn ever for the first thang:
    4 corners of the lawn were used.
    1st corner
    10 hand release Merkins
    10 plank jacks
    Backwards run to corner 2
    20 squats
    20 SSH
    Backwards run to corner 3
    30 Big Ball sit-up
    30 leg lifts
    Backwards run to corner 4
    40 mountain climbers
    40 OH claps

    Repeat one more time.

    Pickup the 6’s Mosey back to start, catch breath, talk a bit.

    Run across the lawn to swings, flowers etc.
    Did balance work with Yoga like moves, but it was definitely NOT Yoga, right Frac?
    Used swings for silly moves that didn’t work out well.
    Incorporated stretches between exercises
    Moved to, dare I say, Ple-A? Nicely done guys!! T-claps!
    10 sets
    Combo Curtsey, backwards, wide back lunges in cadence.
    15 count step ups
    People’s chair with 10,20,30, airpresses
    20 Dippity do da’s

    Circle up at starting point
    7 minutes of Mary,
    Flag and COT to induct an FNG

  • Something Simple – Sort Of – from Charmin

    When YHC saw that there wasn’t a Q signed up for the Uptowner, he knew what to do. YHC has noticed a ton of creative, unique, and original beatdowns as of late and wanted to remind the PAX that a beatdown can be something simple.

    So of course, wanting simplicity, when YHC came up to the gate this morning to see it locked, he knew some audibles would need to be called.

    Mosey on over to the rock pile warm-o-rama, picking up Mayhem along the way. Once we get there:

    15 Side Straddle Hops
    05 Imperial Walkers/Squats/Hillbillies (these still need work)
    16 Mountain Man Poopers
    15 Mountain climbers
    15 LBC’s

    The Thang:
    Mosey on over to the practice field and explain
    One PAX always Moseying to the fence and back.

    Blimps

    B – burpees
    L – lunges
    I – imperial walkers
    M – merkins
    P – plank jacks
    S – squats

    The goal was 100 of each exercise for each PAX, and PAX who completed everything could donate reps to other PAX however this was more audacious than YHC thought it would be while laying on his bed the night before.

    Overall though, this workout was about each PAX pushing himself.

    Along the way we picked up a Klinger and a Fozzy.

    With about 5 minutes to spare, we all started to go back to the Shovel Flag. Some Pax being faster than others, they were told to Plank until everyone was there. Once YHC saw that Kenner Brah and Tenderloin were going to be a minute, and as it wasn’t 6:15 yet, I decided to do one of my favorite Mary exercises, Penguins. Once 6:15 hit and we noticed that not all the PAX were back at the Shovel Flag, the idea to move the shovel flag to the PAX was thrown out and quickly executed; talk about Freed to LEAD!

    COT: Prayers were asked for a work colleague of one of the PAX. Ended with a prayer thanking GOD for allowing us to wakeup this morning and that we all have dignity inherint to us.

  • Attitude Determines Altitude – from Paradox

    YHC touched down at a crisp cool Den today with a single mission: Prepare the PAX for one of modern man’s most grueling mental and physical battles.

    An ultramarathon you say ?
    No , that’s fun …I guess..enjoy your 120.0 bumpersticker bro

    Surely it’s The Iditarod then??psssshh Child’s play and the dogs get all the cardio anyway.

    But wait …Swimming the English Channel? …yea sure that’s cute. My grancy used to do water aerobics too.

    No men , this grueling cauldron of chaos is not for the faint of heart. Today it is YHCs privilege to prepare the pax for …(dramatic pause) ….
    ….taking your family to the airport …there were audible gasps from the Pax as we had to fan Goose back to life after he fainted thinking about 11 suitcases in the van of power but we would soon find out the syncope was actually related to wardrobe vascular constriction.

    So the peanuts were fresh , the runway was clear and if you are getting nauseated by airport puns then you better get the Dramamine baby cus this little Cessna is just getting warmed up!

    Duke! Get your boarding pass
    It’s time for the bean footage!! (TM)

    Warm Up
    Standard issue where we discussed the NYT article about pickleball injuries being the leading cause of F3 fartsacks. Hope our F3 brothers can get some help soon. The first step is knowing you have a problem.

    Thang 1

    As with most fruitful endeavors, the real work starts in the home. When your wife sends you to the attic to get the luggage while she crams shoes into vacuum bags.

    We rifle carried over to the steps where YHC delivered a brief monologue enjoyed by all except the king of monologue’s. We want name him but he looked as if YHC was his 4th job applicant of the day who said “my greatest weakness is having no weakness”.
    Pure disgust from the professor.
    It fuels me.

    Packing luggage
    P1 100 thrusters/squats
    P2 takes coupon over stairs and back in rifle carry
    FencePost is a coupon thruster machine.

    Thrusters really got those propellers spinning and we were halfway through a second ten count when Goose took off his hoodie and changed F3 Thibodaux forever. YHC did an actual double take as my first glance revealed Goose was covered in turquoise body paint. Closer examination revealed a women’s extra small tank top with a euro strip in the back for full trap flex. Silence descended as the backstory unfolded. Our fearless leader had wrestled this item away from his M and 2.0s to better serve the pax after the recent demise of Animal shirt 1.0.
    It’s this brand of tenacity that allows Goose to lead this pirate ship with wreck-less abandon. (How he went 17 minutes with a straight face boggles my mind. )

    YHC tried to recover the blackbox flight plan after this crash but I’d be lying if I wasn’t sneaking peaks at the absolute unit turquoise pectoral muscles across from me. Away from me temptress!

    Alight alright , focus …this is what we trained for.

    Sooooo now You have the 12 year old gmc Acadia busting to the gills with luggage and half eaten cinnamon rolls. You give the ole girl two pats on the hood, she coughs to life and you try to remember when you got new tires, 2017? we’ll be ok. It’s time to head to the danger zone.

    Thang 2 ..the Danger Zone
    Side Block Hops
    Increasing block merkins (irkins ) on Danger zone
    Full disclosure I had no idea there were that many “Dangers “ and this got out of hand fast so I had to pull the plug. Can’t win them all.

    Next you arrive at the parking garage and hustle the short term lot for long term pricing (pro tip from money market Ronnie!)

    TSA final boss

    Conveyor belt race
    2 teams
    Plank side to side pull coupon under backwards when it passes pax does 5 plank jacks. Team Delta took the title with a plank Jack strategy that YJ figured out too late and Im sure there will be a Council of Jeaux about this slight very soon.

    Now you get to your Gate and have 2 hours to kill because that TSA precheck ultra boost double clear (Ronnie did it again!) got you through TSA in a flash so it’s time to impress your family with aviation trivia.

    Head for the hill in front of civic center.
    Right answer lunge to and Back
    Wrong answer , coupon lunge

    1. This American aviator made the worlds first nonstop flight from NYC to Paris
    Charles Lindbergh

    2. 1905 the wright brothers were credited with flying the worlds first plane. first names of the Wright Brothers. (Orville and Wilbur )

    3. What town did this occur in? Kitty Hawk, NC

    4. What does the letters TSA stand for? Transportation Security Administration (great save by Yj)

    Goose was full of that mean girls tank top swagger and crushed 4/4 questions for the pax , even guessing correct questions before YHC got them out.
    Do not bring your medium difficulty trivia into the house of Dawson unless you want to get swatted into the rafters.

    We finished with the main event ..
    The Delta Mile
    4 different layovers with a “flight in between “ and a return to baggage claim. We left Lil cuz at LAX a few times but all found our bags unharmed.

    25 coupon press
    25 coupon OHP
    25 coupon curls
    25 coupon squats

    Great effort here to get our flights on time.

    The real “M” VP of any travel is your wife who always plans the best travel, games, snacks, medicines and we wrapped up with a few rounds of Mary to honor our better halves.

    Goose then bequeathed the Tank of Destiny to YJ and it’s future looks bright.

    Announcements :
    Northshore 12 hour beatdown on Saturday . Goose leaving at 4:15 from the Stage.
    Buy those pre order shirts !

    COT and Goose prayed us out

    NMM

    Does anyone else have that phrase from your childhood that at the time made you sick to your stomach but in the light of adulthood looks better and better. Mine is “your attitude determine your altitude “and if I had one coach say it I had a thousand.

    F3 and our Thibodaux brotherhood has helped this phrase come to life for me. Carrying luggage, shuffling bags, coupon thrusters , silly plank races . These all can be put in the “that’s stupid “ file very quickly. But when combined with shared suffering , and an attitude of “I wont let a physical barrier break my spirit “ well then , the sky is the limit.

    Thanks for flying Paradox Air
    Please return your coupons to the upright position

    SYITG ,
    PDox