F3 New Orleans

Category: New Orleans

  • 279th day in Gregorian Calendar – from Pool Boy

    On a beautiful Friday morning, some stretched and others headed to the football field.
    Warmups consisted of Imperial Walkers, Grass grabbers, Peter Parkers, Parker Peters, Abe Vigodas etc
    Bogey and I took turns with the beatdown from Monkey Grabbers, Calf Raises to Derkins and Lunges(backwards and Forwards). Too many exercises to name…
    Finished at the Rock Pile with Curls, Rows and squats.
    COT

  • Just Keep Moving – from Charmin

    Talking with Tenderloin after a 2+ miles run, he said that we all just need to keep moving.

  • Hangin Tough by Honeysuckle – from Yankee Joe

    A smooth operator once told YHC that your VQ is no big deal – just get it done. YHC thinks this would be true, any year other than 2023 and any F3 other than Thibodaux. We so often get to hear Yankee Kiper, Jr wax poetic about the draft class. And the VQs from that class have the bar set pretty high. So after one false start a few weeks ago, it was finally time to get it done.

    Paradiddle arrived very early, and Enron wasn’t far behind. So we got in at least one Jurpee prior to anything happening. Diddle probably got several in as he Jurped right into Warmarama.

    Warmarama: side straddle hops, imperial walkers, toy soldiers, arm circles one direction then the other direction, cherry pickers, self love, willie mays hayes, maybe not in that order. Or maybe in that order.

    Pre-Thang

    1 Jurpee OYO. This was to provide the PAX a parting gift in case the VQ bombed.

    A little background on one thang of the first thang

    Enron’s Outlive-inspired Q continues to inspire, so ever since YHC had to type in YHC’s name into the spreadsheet for the VQ rather than use a dropdown box, the one seed around which the workout would be built was: grip. Backing up a little, YHC has been so focused on running that the numerous other aspects of fitness were not being maintained. That is where F3 found YHC, and while YHC is unable to complete a warmarama alone due to boredom, when it is done with the group, YHC finds it enjoyable. Now the focus is shifting to “training for life” -the things we need to be able to do to enjoy life, hopefully for a long time. While running helps with Zone 2 and V02 max, we also need functional strength, of which grip is one main component. Opening jars, grabbing onto something to avoid a fall, etc. One way to help with grip, among other things, is by simply hanging from a bar.

    So once “Hang Tough” became the core, it was like watching a slow moving train wreck as the overall theme fell into place. It was unfortunately inevitable what this VQ would become.

    First thang

    That overall theme was Boy Bands. From the 80’s, 90’s, and Today. The first thang would be done in pairs and have multiple stations, with a rotation every minute. Today, the EMOM also stood for Every Menudo on the Menudo. PAX would go around the circuit in One Direction and stay in Sync with their partner. While the temperature was not 98 Degrees anymore, it was still warm enough outside so that we’d all get a good sweat in.

    Stations:
    –Side shuffle the length of the pickleball court fence, Bobby Hurley when you change direction
    –Bonnie Blairs
    –Merkins on the block – Really a decline merkin (Derkin) with feet on the playground border (maybe 1 ft elevation). Not sure if anyone had new Keds today but that would have been cool.
    –Apollo Onos
    –Hang Tough – Hang for the minute on the monkey bars
    –Moroccan Nightclubs

    There was probably a general expectation that today would have lots of running, but YHC instead wanted to encourage endurance for these exercises. Hang Tough certainly required mental and physical endurance (and in today’s case aural endurance, especially for those whose ears were still in their Musical Youth). But as each exercise was for a time duration rather than a rep count, YHC wanted the PAX to find a pace for all exercises, the Bonnie Blairs and Merkins in particular, so that they could be done for the entire minute.

    While boy band music played, the EMOM transitions were marked by the current song pausing and the appearance of NKOTB singing “Step By Step, Oooooh Baby”. While this was heard way too many times this morning, I like to think it had a positive connotation in that it meant the current minute was over. YMMV. But between the exercises and the music, these were likely the longest minutes of the PAXs’ collective lives.

    Songs: Hangin Tough (New Kids on the Block), Larger than Life (Backstreet Boys), Bye Bye Bye (*NSYNC), Give Me Just One Night (Una Noche) (98 degrees), Boy With Luv (BTS). If anyone needs me to sign something to get your Spanish CEUs for the 98 degrees song, just let me know. I’m not certified to give out Korean CEUs yet.

    The PAX, through much physical, mental, and lyrical anguish, completed all 18 minutes of the EMOM, which meant three visits to every station. Goose brought the fire. Pope brought the desire. Valve brought the belief. Hypotenuse said it was nothing. AB didn’t have heartache. Enron said it wasn’t a mistake. Dilly never made me tell him why. And Diddle wanted it that way.

    And they still wanted more.

    So we moved to the running part, which was simply 1.5 laps around the Civic Center. I was All for One, but since we were at the playground there was no way getting around getting the extra half in. YHC still has some kinks to work out with the speaker+phone combo, as the EMOM music started up a couple times during the run giving the PAX PTSD. Also during the run, Diddle wowed the crowd by removing the Animal to reveal the GiGi. Now that is some stage presence and YHC knows a solo career is coming which will ultimately break up the band, until the reunion tour 20 years later.

    Now, back at the Lion, at the Boyz 2 Men station. YHC noted that Boy Bands have made and continue to make many contributions to the world. One of the major contributions is their step by step instructions to achieve a goal. So, we were going to write a boy band song in the remaining few minutes.

    The first question is, how do you turn Boyz to Men? Manmakers, of course. YHC produced two coupons out of the gloom. Going back to our five “pairs” from earlier, one pair at a time does 8 manmakers while the rest of the PAX does some exercise. After the pair doing manmakers finishes, they call the next pair up and then name the next exercise for the PAX as our next step.

    The way it started was: YHC called pair 1 up for manmakers, and announced Step 1 was flutter kicks for everyone else. In the end, the steps were:

    Step 1: Flutter Kicks
    Step 2: V ups
    Step 3: Freddy Mercurys
    Step 4: LBCs
    Step 5: Dying Cockroach
    Step 6: Recover. And that’s the way you do it!

    Animal went to Hypotenuse, due to his consistent posting and hard work. And given two perpendicular lines, he can make it right, and that makes him larger than life.

    Gigi went to America’s Best for having the right stuff when it comes to memes in the group chat.

    Much appreciation for the VQ support today, fellas!!

    SYITG
    Honeysuckle

  • Venti – Pumpkin Spce – from Sea Man

    A health group mustered and we started a minute late, but hey it’s the Venti! We greeted the oder couple on their morning walk, passed the wife and witness protection husband as they made their lap. Along the levy path an angry cyclist zoomed by. Discussion meander from Roofing to Solar Panels

    *Disclaimer – the comfortable pace of the Venti is a great intro for those returning for hiatus or as an introduction.

  • Venti – Pumpkin Spce – from Sea Man

    A health group mustered and we started a minute late, but hey it’s the Venti! We greeted the oder couple on their morning walk, passed the wife and witness protection husband as they made their lap. Along the levy path an angry cyclist zoomed by. Discussion meander from Roofing to Solar Panels

    *Disclaimer – the comfortable pace of the Venti is a great intro for those returning for hiatus or as an introduction.

  • Change of Pace – from Sea Man

    It’s Tusnami! Fast group ran street car line past Washington and back for 5miles at just under 9 min pace! The pacers headed around the fly for 3.2 at 10:30 pace.

  • Boot Scootin’ Goosies – from Paradox

    Theres one singular event that universally strikes fear in the hearts of men. A rite of passage complete with every potential fear being confronted. A desolate wasteland where fortune favors the bold and one misstep can leave you cemented into a hall of shame . You’ve all passed through it and been forged by the fires of ..the middle school dance.

    But there IS one tool at your disposal . One shining sword for the gangly awkward youth entangled in this hormonal warfare. You’ve all seen this familiar setup. It’s the 7th grade dance and opposite genders have receded to their corners in the dance floor. The air is heavy with axe body spray. If you were like YHC , you hoped the Hollister shirt and puca shell necklace were enough distraction to overcome a genetic lack of rhythm. The dj eyes the empty dance floor ,madly spinning tracks to light the fire and then he finds it …

    …The participation song!

    Cupid shuffle ..
    The locomotion ..
    Electric slide ..
    They all accomplish the same goal.

    Like a flame thrower to dry kindling one kid joins, then another and as long as you are following the instructions loosely there’s a certain freedom from severe judgement that allows the dancing to begin.

    These songs have saved countless male youths from the embarrassment of freestyle dancing and during my recent midnight baby burping sessions I uncovered this lucrative treasure trove of F3 enterpainment.

    So with the fresh Jurpee routine in mind and a few songs in my heart YHC made a stage comeback with 10 other high impact men. A crisp bayou fall met them in the gloom and the stage was set.
    Today we salute the participation song.

    Duke ! Dukeeee!!!!
    Hold these diapers and Roll the bean footage !

    Warmup
    Standard issue with Tana literally side straddle hopping across the circle. His verbal insubordination overflowing into interpretive dance as if he could preemptively feel todays theme. You can only hope to contain him at this point.

    Warmup Thang

    Jurpee Mile-ish

    Saddled up for the well warn path of the rich man loop mile with stops for a segmented jurpee. We helped some pax in the senior divisions remember where all the stops were and YHC dialed up all the classics with JBL cranked to the level of “HoA concerns”. The air was cool and mannnn I’ve missed you guys.

    (Tana keeping a Kenyan marathon pace, ya love to see it. The legendary transformation continues )

    We did :
    1- tempo sqats/20 groiners
    2- 20 merkins/20 groiners
    3- 20 jump sqats
    4- 20 LBC/leg raise

    Then grabbed come coupons for the :

    Main Thang a Lang

    4 songs to represent the transcendent nature of the participation songs across genres, live events, generations and continents.

    1. ) Boot scootin boogie
    2 Apollo ono plus 2 goosie on “ Boot scoot”
    Coupon “2 step” on duration of song.
    From now until eternity we will call them Boot Scootin Goosies and I can’t decide if that sounds more like a firework from Joe Dirt or a station for next years SV500.

    Trivia : what are the first names of brooks and Dunn?
    The pax had this one down cold even with YHCs brain glitches trying to find the word artist. Also from Shreveport just like Ronnie Lillich !

    Track refresh mosey

    2. Time for da hip hop- Tootsie Roll
    (Was really hoping for a Popeye post here. Have a feeling he’s done 9000 tootsie rolls )

    We did :
    Donkey kick on T roll
    Right Peter Parker
    Left Parker
    Slide – side reach
    Whoop plank Jack
    Trivia – Artist? : 69 boys (great jurpee team name )
    I had a feeling this would be right in America’s Bests wheelhouse. with some prompting he took a minute off the pain. Goose showed signs of the move itself and YHC fought the temptation to let him tootsie roll for 5 minutes while we did kraken burpees.

    3. Da community -YMCA

    Y styled windmills on song
    4 merkins on YMCA
    Jump squat on “young man”

    Fun fact: The original YMCA arm motions appeared on this popular musical show in 1979. (American bandstand)

    4. International- Gangnam style
    Coupon side shuffle
    Thruster on Gangnam style

    YHC introduced this one and had the desired response of crickets, wind, and Goose asking Enron if it was 6am yet. I’ve sorely missed that unique smell of fear and adrenaline.

    YJ correctly named psy as the artist then insisted someone be appointed as the oogler so we would be music video accurate. Unfortunately by this point all the pax had gone to the dark place that thrusters create after a month of IPC and his request faded into old man grumbles about deleted cells.

    So now you have the dance party fully rolling the only thing you have left to focus on is learning your partners rhythm and footwork.

    So we partnered up (1 thruple)
    For a Double Indian run with 3 partner hi 5 burpees to corner on Richmans loop till everyone had one round.
    Honeysuckle did honeysuckle things and set a sub7 pace while we watched in awe. I can’t tell if it’s sleep deprivation but I swear his legs blur like road runner in the ole Wiley Coyote bits.

    We finished with a thrilling rendition of Rah Rah JaBurpee. Tennis ball can only be advanced with feet. One burpee after kicking. Beautiful chaos ensued and we lost two good soldier tennis balls in the field. No clear winner from YHCs point of view but I saw Ronnie diving under a truck after a ball near the finish line so I’ll give an A for effort.
    Jeaux continued to run headlong into the distance. Said he just needed to think about a grown man not being able to work Google sheets.
    Folks in the Oaks say he’s still running…

    Count them up
    Name them off

    Announcements:

    T- claps to Hypotenuse for multiple posts and suffering through my lack of hand eye coordination.

    Honeysuckle VQ!!!
    Thursday at the Den
    Get your running shoes ladies!

    Invigor8 Grant next Tues 10/10 at 7pm (link below)
    Possible $10k is up for grabs to the St Vincent pharmacy.

    https://facebook.com/events/s/invigor8-live/1909647176102809/

    COT and YJ prayed us out

    Men I’ve been overwhelmed by the support y’all have shown my family during our new baby days. The baby/work/school/home routines are in a tornado of a transitions right now and we are just hanging in. Great to have y’all linking shields in support and prayer.

    Epilogue

    One jurpee
    Two jurpee
    Red jurpee
    Blue jurpee

    You can do it on a rope
    You can do it with a Pope
    You can try it with a Goose
    Or measure your hypotenuse
    Tana jurps on his strain quest
    Honeysuckles uses it as rest
    AB is jurping till hes fifty
    Ronnie’s jurping till his knees are shifty
    Bud light jurping, call it Dilly Dilly
    Poor jurp form, that’s really silly
    Jurptober is all about the basics
    Valvelines jurping till he needs lasix
    At a jurp party you’re never late
    Jeauxs been jurpin since 78!

    Jurp low jurp high
    Jurp loud jurp shy

    Jurp your best jurp along with another
    As iron sharpens iron, one sharpens his brother

    SYITG
    ParaDr Seuss

  • Push It to the Limit – from Charmin

    Today was about pushing it to the limit, either with running, KnOTibg, or running back to your house for a stretching pad becuase Boo-boo can’t handle the ground.

    Either way, we all came back (with some additional late comers) for the COT. Prayed in thanksgiving for new life and in supplication for those who need help.

  • Shmedium Rocks in the Field – from Mayhem

    YHC grabbed the Q ten hours before game time.
    6 PAX for the real workout. 7 PAX went to walk around with Scantron.

    Disclaimer followed by a mosey in the direction of the rock pile. Selected a well lit area so those that caught the train could easily find us.

    Abe Vigodas, Grass Grabbers, Imperial Walkers (except Mahatma, he wanted to do Hill Billies first), Hill Billies (except for Mahatma, he already did them), Peter Parker Peter, Mountain Climbers, Arm Circles, Reverse Arm Circles.

    Grab a SHMEDIUM rock and circle up.
    8 minutes, non-stop reps, 8 reps each, keep repeating the circuit
    STORC: squats, triceps, overhead, row, curls
    Every minute, we drop for 3 burpees

    Bring your SHMEDIUM rock to the field with preset cones.
    Rd 1: murder bunny to first cone, 10 manmakers, lunge to second cone, 10 manmakers, rifle carry to third cone, 10 manmakers, bear crawl pushing rock back to second cone, rifle carry to start
    Rd 2: murder bunny to first cone, 10 thrusters, lunge to second cone, 10 thrusters, rifle carry to third cone, 10 thrusters, bear crawl pushing rock back to second cone, rifle carry to start
    Rd 3: leave the rock, bear crawl to first cone, 10 merkins, bear crawl to second cone, 10 merkins, bear crawl to third cone, 10 merkins, backpedal to start

    Rifle carry, indian walk back to near rock pile

    3 minutes, non-stop reps, 8 reps each, keep repeating the circuit
    STORC: squats, triceps, overhead, row, curls
    Every minute, we drop for 3 burpees

    Return the rock
    2 minutes of Mary
    Back to the flag for COT
    The 8 walkers were 3 minutes late, walking

    Announcements: Hand Grenada and Mahatma have a burpee bet on the 2024 LSU-Ole Miss game

    Intentions: Scantron’s nephew, Blake, and all those that remain silent

    Great to lead
    SYITG

  • Westbank Cindy 500 #IPC – from Thighs

    Before the Iron Pax Challenge closed, the OG AO decided to do at least one of the workouts. We chose the Cindy 500.

    We started w/ a warm-up:

    15x Jumping Jacks
    7x Windmills
    7x Cherry Pickers
    7x Merkins
    7x Peter Parkers
    7x In Tempo Merkins
    8x Squats
    Mosey around the block

    Since we had 4 PAX, we split into two groups. We also had coupons and 30lb dumbbells.
    1 group did each set of exercises together.
    1 group partnered up and rotated the exercises.
    *NOTE: If doing the Cindy 500 as partners, recommend starting each round with a set of 5x so that each partner gets to do three exercises in the round.

    Round 1
    10x Merkins
    15x Thrusters
    20x Merkins
    25x Thrusters
    30x Merkins
    200m run around the block

    Round 2
    10x Thrusters
    15x V-Ups
    20x Thrusters
    25x V-Ups
    30x Thrusters
    200m run around the block

    Round 3
    10x V-Ups
    15x Jungle Boys
    20x V-Ups
    25x Jungle Boys
    30x V-Ups
    200m run around the block

    Round 4
    10x Jungle Boys
    15x Blockees
    20x Jungle Boys
    25x Blockees
    30x Jungle Boys
    200m run around the block

    Round 4
    10x Blockees
    15x Merkins
    20x Blockees
    25x Merkins
    30x Blockees
    200m run around the block

    After 45 minutes, we could only get one round of the Cindy 500 completed.

    Some were saying that they felt the Thrusters for a couple days later!

    It was a tough workout, like all the Iron Pax Challenge is.

    We ended with the usual close out, sending us off with a prayer.

    Looking forward to next time!