F3 New Orleans

Category: Backblasts

  • Apple Turnover Extravaganza – from T-Square

    The mildly humid air was just right for this apple turnover inspired beatdown with Vagabond (t-claps for rounding up the troops!), Willie, Fracsac, & our visiting pax, Choot’em from downrange in Katy, TX!

    After a brief warm-up lap, stretching, and some four OYO 4×4’s, we dug into the main course.

    The setup: cones spaced every ~12 feet for about 40 yards
    The Thang:
    Apple Turnover – two times – single file starting at cone 1, bear crawl to cone 2, crabwalk to cone 3, bear crawl to cone 4, and so on till reaching the canon. Then jog another 30 yards to the Gretna seal, wait for the 6 then sprinkle in a core exercise (listed below). Rinse and repeat once before the next dish.

    Fritters – two times – (similar to Apple Turnover, but change up the alternating exercises to Lunge Walk & Burpee Broad jump) Then jog another 30 yards for some core exercise. Rinse and repeat once before the next dish.

    Sliders – two times – (you get the idea… the two alternating exercises: Karaoke for two cone spacings then Wojo for one cone spacing, alternating down the line of cones). Jog another 30 yards for some core exercise. Rinse and repeat once before the next dish.

    Pop Tart – two times – the two alternating exercises: High Knees & Bear Crawl (alternating down the line of cones). Jog another 30 yards for some core exercise.

    Core exercises at the Gretna seal – changed it up each lap:
    4 count Merkins x15
    4 count dying cockroach x15
    4 count hello dolly x15
    50 OYO LBCs
    4 count windshield wipers x10
    4 count flutter kicks x15
    Echo count straight leg lifts x30
    60 second plank

    At the end, we wrapped up with a 2-½ min Suck-it – Aiken Legs: OYO rinse & repeat 20 step ups, 20 squats, 20 lunges, 20 split jacks (rinse & repeat to the buzzer).

    Last but not least – Lazy Boys – echo count – straight back for 15, then left 10 and right 10.

  • The Big Shamrock’s Birthday Bash – from Lil Cuz

    As I’m sure many of you are aware, today is a very special day. Today we celebrate the birth of Big Shamrock himself. AKA Hobo Master, AKA The Big Banana, AKA The Big Galactus,
    AKA Witness Protection, AKA Manny Shaq-Iaou, AKA MayorMcShaq,or more commonly
    known as Shaquille O’Neal AKA Shaq.

    Typical Warm up with the added blessing of a Cajun recipe shared by Enron that got all Pax riled up wanting to know how to make Fake Turtle Soup. Crowd went wild as he explained the intricacies of such a delicacy that most of the circle couldn’t help but dry heave as he blasted the remnants from last night across everyone’s assaulted nostrils. Mouths were open…

    Thang 1:

    Trivia Questions:
    If Correct – 34 – Freddy Mercs (2:1), or Flutter Kicks (2:1), or LBC’s (1:1)
    If Wrong – 32 Squats (1:1)

    1. What year was Shaquille O’Neal born? Incorrect

    – 1972

    2. What position was Shaq selected in the 1992 NBA Draft? Incorrect

    – Round 1; Pick 1

    3. How many NBA Championships has Shaq won? Incorrect

    – 4

    4. What is Shaq’s rap name? Correct

    – Big Diesel

    5. Name one of Diesel’s 4 album releases: Correct

    – Shaq Diesel
    – Shaq Fu: Da Return
    – You Can’t Stop the Reign
    – Respect

    6. What famous artist featured Diesel on his album titled “HIStory”? Incorrect

    – Michael Jackson

    7. How tall was Shaq by the age of 10? Correct

    – 6’ 4”

    8. What was Shaq’s free throw career percentage? Incorrect

    – 52.7%
    – FUN Fact: He once missed all 11 of his free throw attempts in a game against
    the Seattle SuperSonics on December 8, 2000, which is the current record.

    9. What is Shaq’s 3-pointer career percentage? Incorrect

    – 4.5% or 1 in 22 attempts

    10. Shaq was nominated for 3 Golden Raspberry Awards for his work in film, what was one
    of the categories nominated? Correct
    – Worst New Star
    – Worst Actor
    – Worst Supporting Actor

    Honestly expected going into this portion we would have way more ab type workouts to do and instead we did so many more squats which would prove to be detrimental once we got to Thang 3…more on that later. Enron has got his best CPA co-workers on the calculations as we got reminded this morning math is not his strong suit, and Dox sent his wife to brainstorm with the other doctors as they are all hard at work calculating the exact number of squats performed this morning. We all wait with sore quads in anticipation to know how manly our legs will be tomorrow morning upon waking up. Word is Goose has gone home to study for Kobe Bryant’s birthday to be better prepared come August. Now with our fresh knowledge that will definitely be on the test at the end of the semester, we moved into our training and competition.

    Thang 2: Cone Dribbling Drill
    1. Each Pax on a team must dribble through the cone course and return back to the team then the next pax can go.
    2. While the Pax is dribbling the rest of the team will do various workouts until Dribbling
    Pax is done.

    1. SSH (1:1)
    2. Flutter Kicks (2:1)
    3. Squats (1:1)
    4. LBCs (1:1)
    5. Al Gore (1:1)
    6. 6” Inch hold (1:1)

    Team wins when each team member has dribbled twice through the course. Winning team
    receives nothing but props for being better ball handlers than the other team. Side Note: YHC neglected to mention that this was a race until near the second lap and this probably is the reason Team 2 lost. No excuses though, Team 2 just needs to start dribbling practice for Big Shamrock’s Birthday next year. First practice is Wednesday at 9pm after kids go to bed. See you guys at the Lion’s Den. Team 1, find your own place to practice!

    Thang 3: 11’s
    Burpee (1:1)
    – Mosey with #1’s pointing to Sky to opposite Sidewalk
    Apolo Ohnos (2:1)
    – Nur Back with Hand held up like after just making 1st (and only) Career 3-
    pointer

    This portion was simply put here to make sure all the whoopers could show their strain to the rest of the world. Looking forward to those screen shots fellas. Also, all those incorrect answers and squats really piled on to make this thang increasingly difficult. The ANIMAL himself recognized another ANIMAL in his midst and I believe it was the grit and determination Cardinal showed to complete this monster of strain pushed him over the edge to be gifted the peeled back sweat covered shirt off Smooth and is Monday’s ANIMAL. (Which will be gifted on Thursday due to unforeseen conflicts for a Tuesday Tuff).

    4MOM potlock style with Goose throwing in the crowd favorite Dr. W’s and Dox finishing us
    off with his ever famous Dolphin Hops. Gotta love em! (Cuz we do them so much).

    COT and Paradox prayed us out!
    Great Birthday celebration today fellas, and thanks for putting up with Enron’s fake turtle soup recipe long enough to get through another beatdown.

    SYITG,

    Lil’ Cuz, AKA Cuz Master, AKA The Big CUZ, AKA, Manny Cuz-Iaou, AKA MayerMcCuz,
    or more commonly known as Cuz.

  • Big Marsh – from Akbar

    A late afternoon Slack shout out from Bushwhacker was the last thing YHC saw before the eyelids closed. MARSH MARSH MARSH MARSH MARSH MARSH. Followed by a string of mumblechatter from Marsh Madness, Batman, and Meme’s of Homer and something about Shots. This brought a recent record of 6, a recent Milestone, for a block beatdown.

    Conditions 60ish and pleasant

    Warm Up – SSH, Arm Circles x 20 IC Self Love, Grass Grabbers, Toe Touches, and Windmills x10

    Thang – After a warm up run to Marigny, the Thang began. 100 reps each, 6 exercises, split into rounds of 20. After each round, mosey to the playground for 5 pull ups, and run down to Marigny and back

    OH Press, Goblet Squat, Curls for the Girls, Calf Raise, Chest Press or Merkin, LBC

    Mary – Head to the basketball court baseline, 10 Crunchy Frogs at each line to the other end, jog back. Repeat with Mountain Climbers, head to circle and Bird prayed us out.

    Announcements – April 1 7th Anniversary Convergence 12Q at the Lakefront. 12 beatdowns, 12 Q’s ,12 Hours. Endurathon – March 17-19th. F3 has a team of 4 running, sponsorships and support runner sign ups available.

    Thanks for showing up and following the lead.

    SYITG – Akbar

  • Step Back, Security Coming Through – from Willie

    One of the ways we earned money for our fraternity was to work as security guards for concerts at the UNO Lakefront Arena. I was able to see several great bands over the years! I created a playlist for this workout of songs from bands that I worked security for back in the 90s. Not all of the shows were for popular bands, so there are a few doozies in the playlist too. If one of the PAX wanted to skip a song, the entire PAX did 10 burpees. Only one skip was allowed at a time, you cannot skip two songs in a row. Oduls hit shuffle, and we were off, “Everything Zen” by Bush blaring, on our way for a warm up at the base of the big mountain. The following were done in cadence:
    SSHx20, Imperial Walkers x20, Arm Circles F/B x10, Grass Grabbers x10, Hillbillies x20

    Between Arm Circles and Grass Grabbers, “Children Will Listen” by Barbara Streisand played and was promptly skipped by Jingle Vader. 10 Burpees for the PAX.

    Next we broke into two lines and did an Indian Run to the 4th floor. YHC was running with the speaker in the center of the lines to make sure everyone was enjoying the music.

    Once we were on the 4th floor, we circled up for a Monkey Humper ring of fire. This was hilarious to watch! The PAX were holding Al Gore, one Pax did 20 MHs, the next started at 10, and so on… Next was a more traditional Merkin ring of fire with a 15 and 10 split while we are all holding plank.

    Before starting the Merkin Ring of Fire, ole Babs struck again with “You Don’t Bring Me Flowers.” Couch skipped, PAX did 10 Burpees

    We proceeded to the top of the Mountain mosying on the flats and running backwards on the incline. At the top I called for a 20 count from Manchovy. We had a mid-workout stretch (We don’t stretch enough) immediately following.

    The next thang were BLIMPS down the Mountain. 5 Burpees to start on the top floor, then 10 Lunges on the next floor down, followed 15 IWs, 20 Merkins, 25 Plank Jacks, and 30 Squats on the 1st floor. We hit a run of good music, so there were no more skips to this point.

    Next we ran to Rosy Palm Court for a little Mary all exercises in cadence. I led off with Penguins x15, Angie’s List was next with 30 LBCs, King Kong with 20 Hello Darlenes, Gabby with 15 Crunchy Frogs.

    Right when we were about to head back to the flag, Douille called skip on “Hey Jealousy” by the Gin Blossoms… The PAX did 10 Burpees. No one plays the villian role better than Douille!

    We ended with a COT then adjourned for coffee at PJs. Its always an honor to lead this group of great men!

  • What happened to Spring? – from Thighs

    Wow, was it a warm morning to workout. Wasn’t it winter just last week?

    We started the beat down with a warmup:

    Mosey around the block
    15x Jumping Jacks
    7x Self Loves
    10x Sun Gods
    7x Windmills
    7x Cherry Pickers
    7x Merkins
    7x Toe Touches
    7x Mountain Climbers
    7x Tempo Merkins
    7x Squats
    7x Tempo Squats

    Then we Mosey-ed to the parking lot to do:
    A set of 11s across the parking lot with:
    Burpees
    Diamond PushUps

    Then we Mosey-ed to the parking garage.
    There we 3 sets of 7 flights of stairs. After each flight of stair, we did:
    25x Merkins
    20x Ab Raises
    15x Diamond Merkins
    10x Hand Release Merkins
    5x Wall Derkins

    After we came down the last set of stairs, we set up for (1) set of Suicides across the length of the parking garage.
    The stations were:
    10x Merkins
    10x Bonny Blairs
    10x Mountain Climbers
    10x Air Squats

    After that workout and getting beat down from the heat and lack of water, we Mosey-ed back to stretch and close out.

    It was a beat down. Again, I think it was more because we were not ready for the heat and not how hard the Q made the physical training.

    Looking forward to next time!

  • Hit the Bricks! OR When Everyone’s Falling Apart, It’s Time to Push ‘Em Harder – from Bushwacker

    With May weather showing up in February, who knew we would get more 50s in the morning! It was a welcome way to start a challenging beat down on what will prove to be a gorgeous day! For YHC, this morning was about putting my money where my mouth is. There have been some grumbles about the same people signing up to lead the same workouts, and, to be quite honest, the work outs and moral are suffering. How creative, challenging and dynamic can a Q be with his beat down, when he’s lead the same one on the same day 30 out of the last 40 times?! So Bushwacker’s name was added to the sign up sheet and he brought the pain! (maybe a little too much?)

    WARMORAMA

    With Q running a little behind setting up props for the main-ish event, Zoo lander was kind enough to get things started with some Toe Touches and 1 or 2 other exercises. QIC continued with: IC 5 Torso Twists, x10 High Knees, Butt Kicks, Scuba Steves, Mountain Climbers, Shoulder Taps

    THANG

    OYO 100 Lunge Walks towards the west, then mosey to The Shaft.

    1st and 10:

    Markers were set up on the sea wall at 20′ intervals (not enough room for 10 yard intervals). Starting at the 1st marker each man started 11’s with 10 merkins and 1 Burpee in the same place. After, sprint to the last marker and recovery run back to the second marker for 9 Merkins and 2 Burpees, sprint to the end, recovery walk to marker 3, etc. etc. When finished, return to the start and Plank or core exercise to wait for the 6. It was as the process was being explained that Grundy graced us with his presence.

    After all the PAX (and then Jose) had finished, they took advantage of the markers to run Suicides (or Gaskets, Wind Sprints or whichever moniker you prefer).

    Next was a mosey back to the Gazebo, which was when Grundy revealed his inhaler on account of a mild asthma attack! He eventually made it to find Akbar’s Ring of Fire in progress. Whereas the Ring of Fire is a circle of Planks where each man drops for a Merkin as the count reaches him, Akbar’s version consists of a Merkin followed by a leap to to your feet and a hop with hands raised, all in a Burpee-ish fashion. 50 some-odd counts later, the Pax returned to 100 Lunge Walks OYO then mosied the rest of the way to the flag.

    By this point JV was stealing Jose’s grumble thunder regarding all of this darn running, on account of a lingering mystery injury to his foot/ankle. At the flag: 25 Jump Squats OYO, on the wall for: IC Freak Nasties, Irkins, Dirkins, and 25 OYO Box Jumps, where the acutely winded Grundy barked his shin on the cocnrete wall. EMT Todd was on sick leave, and since almost-Eagle Scout Baby Yoda was not present, the always prepared and ever dependable Zoolander leapt into action grabbing a first aid kit from his truck for a little BLS work on the twice-felled Grundy.

    Mosied to Noah Ark and circled up for a variation of Global Warming, where Holding AL Gore, each Pax counted off as they popped up (or squatted lower) individually, counting to 100.
    Mosied back to the flag for…

    MARY

    IC x25 Flutter Kicks, 20 Hello Dollys, 20 Wife Pleasers, 25 Freddy Mercurys, OYO 100 100’s

    COT

    Count, Name, we lost a few of our brethren along the way in Waterpik, Bird, and Grundy, though some came back, in the ineffably resilient Grundy,and some joined late, in Maverick, and later, in Cowbell (Starsky). Speaking of joining us, even though YHC missed his latest actual return last week, welcome back Cotter in Butt Splice! He was kind enough to pray us out on this lovely lovely day.

    The Endurathon benefiting the Nehemiah Project is coming up on March 17-19 at area 3 group camp at Fontainbleau Sate Park. Support the F3 team by sponsoring a loop, or joining in running a loop with Jose, Hammer, Speedy, or Tank. There will be camping Friday and Saturday night so bring the fam!

    The Fury, the Northshore’s 7th anniversary convergence will be on Saturday April 1 starting at 6am on the Lakefront. 12 45 min beat downs, 12 Qs, every hour on the hour! Come for 1, 2, or 12 like Tank. Drinks at the Barley Oak to follow at 6pm. See Slack for the sign up sheet to see who will be Q and to let F3 know which beatdowns you wish to attend. Let’s get a crowd all day long!

    And finally, making this thing – OUR thing – the best it can be, as well as the most attractive to sad clowns and other guys who generally might consider joining us, it takes the effort and dedication of all the PAX. If, excuses aside, your schedule legitimately allows it, consider coming out to a week day beat down and see your brothers more than once a week. As long as Ive been in F3 I can truly say that getting up has been treacherously challenging some mornings, but not once have I EVER regretted getting to a beatdown!
    And while we’re at it, let’s give Russo, Akbar, Shooter, and Waterpik a break and commit to a few Qs. Sign up and let’s get as full as we can a month out each month.

    Big congratulations to Amnesia who, rumor has it, has accepted job offer in Pennsylvania, and to Cowbell and Mrs Cowbell who are expecting TWINS!!!

    Gentlemen, I remain humbled by the opportunity to lead such a fine group of guys, and appreciate your willingness to follow that sometimes fickle, sometimes grueling, sometimes non-sensicle lead

    Bushwacker Sr.

  • BOMBS Away! (Mothership 2023-03-04) – from Catfish

    Conditions – A cool 60-ish degrees

    The Thang

    Quick Mosey over to the peristyle for a warmup:

    SSH x 30 (in cadence)
    Abe Vigodas x 10 (in cadence)
    Grass Grabber x 10 (in cadence)
    8-Counts x 15 (in cadence)
    Peter Parker Peters x 20 (in cadence)

    Moseyed over to the Great Lawn and partnered up for BOMBS (50 burpees, 100 overhead claps, 150 merkins, 200 big boys, 250 squats). One partner ran to other side, did three 8-counts, then ran back while other exercised. Also got in some some SSH, LBTs, and Dying Cockroaches waiting for the six

    Moseyed to the peristyle/bench area for some leg action:

    Bulgarians x 20 (in cadence)
    Side Leg Lifts x 20 (in cadence)
    Bulgarians other leg x 20 (in cadence)
    Side Leg Lifts other leg x 20 (in cadence)
    Bonnie Blairs x 20 (in cadence)
    Back Leg Lifts x 20 (in cadence)
    Irkins x 20 (in cadence)
    Back Leg Lifts other leg x 20 (in cadence)
    Imperial Squat Walkers x 20 (in cadence)

    On to sixes for ten Dr. W’s (in cadence), then back to flag zone for CoT.

  • Kill or Be Killed (by Pope) – from Goose

    Some things you never get too old for. On the morning of March 4, YHC showed the PAX that grown men can run around (a lot) and play like the young men they once were. YHC showed up at the Peltch with a bag-o-flags filled with a limited amount of belt flags… the more PAX showed up, the more uncertain YHC became. YHC probably did more head counts in five minutes than he ever did in one day (impressive considering the amount of potential 2.0s at YHC’s home).
    We began with the usual warmup routine (SSH, imperial walkers, windmills, high knees, butt kicks, arm circles, cherry pickers) and headed to the EDW field. There, YHC distributed the belt flags which, thankfully, were distributed among all the PAX (Sonic and FNG each used one). We then split into teams and stationed at opposite goal lines for F3 Braveheart.
    To begin the first round, all PAX bear-crawled to the 20-yard line, then stood up and began the battle. Enemy PAX attempted to pull off their opponent’s flags (PAX had two flags; two lives) until one team is utterly vanquished. When a PAX was slain, he would drop and hold plank until the end of the round. The second round began at the 30-yard line with defeated PAX holding Al Gore. Finally, with the adrenaline of battle pumping through the veins, the third round resolved—every man for himself. YHC and FNG tied for winner because of unclear regulations concerning if someone went out of bounds. (Note: none of the rounds ended with any prize for the winning team, but no one asked…so…)
    The next thang involved a choice made by each PAX individually: 7 burpees at the start and halfway point of the entire track with sprints in between, or 20 Catalina Wine Mixers and a full-track sprint. Preference differed among the PAX. The second round, however, was an easy choice for most: 25 burpees and a full-track “sprint”, or 15 merkins at each corner, with lunge-walks for the straights and jogging on the curves (this obvious choice was YHC’s way of weeding out those who were NOT good candidates for the next ANIMAL). YHC, Goats in the Machine, Smooth Operator, and two of the four 2.0s chose the lunge-walk. Goats and the 2.0s switched choices a quarter of the way through… YHC was determined to finish when, two-thirds of the way through, Goose decided to catch the “ill-choosing” 6. We began to regroup and prepared to mosey, when we noticed Smooth still hammering out his third set of merkins! We picked him up and moseyed to the lower field with a pretty clear idea of our next ANIMAL.
    At the field Goose and YHC set up a small field about 30 yards long and initiated a game of PAX-&-Minnows. Goose started as the voluntary first shark and took his position at one end line while the rest of the PAX lined up on the other end. Throughout the two games played, the sharks began each round with two burpees with the minnows completing four merkins, then the minnows tried to make it safely to the other end line without being devoured (tagged) by a shark. Wounded (tagged) minnows dropped and performed LBCs until the round was over, while successful minnows did 10 star jumps in celebration of their survival. Coyote was the last man (well, person) standing at the end of the first game, and Lil’ Cuz remained after the second game.
    Back at the flag, Mary was performed in potluck fashion, with Coyote initiating box cutters and Lil’ Cuz calling leg lifts. Smooth was eager to lead us in burpees, and YHC reluctantly trumped with crunchy frogs. In COT our FNG, 2.0 of Superfun(d), was dubbed Superfas(t), reflecting his self-proclaimed performance in Braveheart and adding to our list of tee-tiny 2.0s. And of course, Smooth Operator left that morning with the well-deserved title of ANIMAL.
    SYITG, Pope

  • No OYO – Teamwork – March Mental Awareness – from Hokie

    YHC awakened to the sound of rain which does not align with dry feet

    I then arrived at The Uptowner with a sparse crowd as 0530 approached

    YHC announced March as Mental Awareness Month and started warm ups with TWO slow Vigodas… there were twice as many suicides as murders… that is scary!

    We then were surprised as a carload of 6 appeared so we once again implored the Pax to reach out and check on folks this month

    Positive Mental Awareness Beatdown

    Bogey
    Buxton
    Disclaimer
    Fast Tax
    Heisenberg
    Hokie
    Mahatma
    Spidie (FNG at beginning of our workout)
    Super Dooper Cooper
    Tenderloin
    The Architect
    T-Rex

    Another year is upon us and in the tradition of F3, another March Mental Battle Month!

    TToe to Y x 14 – LA ranked 14th Highest Prevalence of Mental Illness (that is up from 18th)

    Imperial Walkers x 22 – vets/day who lose the mental battle – 22 veterans commit suicide EVERY DAY. Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in America.

    After warmup, partner up.

    Each set will have stats about mental health and workplace mental health. The workout will be in the form of a Dora 123. As you are working with a partner (No OYO), each stat is doubled.

    Pax 1 will run across field while Pax 2 starts exercise…. With a twist…. I set 11 alarms, whenever the alarm sounds, we ALL do Burpees until Mahatma announces he is finished then continue…

    Round 1 –

    50,000,000 adult Americans experienced mental illness

    56% of employees spend time looking for another job.

    27,000,000 Americans with mental illness are unable to receive treatment.

    100 Lunges each leg (2 is 1)
    112 Hand Release Merkins
    54 Low Slow Squats

    Round 2 –

    60% of employees do not feel their management helps them to deal with stress.

    33% of employees can’t afford their healthcare costs.

    80% of employees reported feeling emotionally drained by their work.

    120 Big Boy Sit ups
    66 Burpees
    160 Stars each leg (2 is 1)

    This resulted in 110 -ish burpees at alarm settings (at least for Mahatma) plus 33- ish each Pax

    I love each of you! Mental battles are real and there is no reason to feel ashamed! Please reach out for help if you need help.

    If you or someone you know needs immediate help, please reach out to 800-273-8255.

    Till next time.

    Special thank you to all who endured and to our three single digit Pax… Super Duper Cooper, T-Rex and Spidey (our newest and youngest Pax!)

  • A Lion, A Partnership, and a Tank Top: A Short Story – from Yankee Joe

    Seven PAX showed at the Lion’s Den, which was a nice surprise. The night before, YHC had shared a pre-blast with his M, and she responded with something like, “This is why you have difficulty making friends.” Ouch. But, she’s kinda right.

    The idea was inspired by Goose’s Burpee Time(r) beatdown the Tuesday Tuff prior. In that beatdown, PAX rotated through a variety of exercises for the duration of however long it took one PAX to complete 20 burpees. Though grueling, YHC noticed how much more eager he was to push through the pain of 20 burpees when other PAX’s suffering was hanging in the balance. So YHC attempted to take that “leave no PAX behind” commitment to partner commitments. In this episode of “we’re not medical or even fitness professionals,” Partner 2 would work through a combined 15 minutes of elbow plank work, while Partner 1 (the Timer) worked through sets of varying stupidity.

    Ok, so my way of making friends looks different. But is it effective? Well, probably not. Regardless, YHC was happy to see Fence Post who has started to become a mainstay of the Thursday Lion’s Den. In the mold of Lil’ Cuz, his quiet, methodical movements through a beatdown inspire a sense of deep respect. His sheer strength is still unnerving. YHC can’t wait to see him in action come Iron Pax. Part of the reason the Lion’s Den came into being was to be closer to Chackbay. As the Cardinal flies, it is only a few miles. That said, Cardinal does not fly, and he showed up “on time” in the same way crawling “backward is forward” for a crab. Goats in the Machine apparently wants to be a crab too, though he probably still thinks beatdowns start at 5:30 and not 5:15. But the man keeps showing up, and that’s all that matters. Enron made his appearance in an unpredictably good mood. Erich the Great aka Ragnar aka Tana showed sporting his newly acquired six pack abs courtesy of F3. Goose showed up wearing a tank top reading ANIMAL on the front. Enron somehow said nothing about it. I’ll get to that in a bit.

    Warm-up 5:15 – 5:25
    Side straddle hops
    Windmills 15 ct
    Arm circles forward 15 ct
    Arm circles backward 15 ct
    Cherry pickers 15 ct
    Self love
    High knees 15 ct
    Knoxville cherry pickers 15 ct
    Mountain climbers 10 ct
    Mosey around civic center

    The Thangggg 5:27 – 6:00
    Partner up; Start on embankment in front of civic center
    P1 exercise represents the timer for each station
    P2 exercise happens simultaneously until P1 has finished
    P1 & P2 bear crawl between each station
    At end of circuit, P1 & P2 flapjack, then work their way back through stations
    Mosey around civic center between rounds

    Circuit Round 1
    Station 1
    P1 does 25 decline groiners on embankment
    P2 does decline peter parker merkins on embankment
    When P1 finished, both bear crawl 15 yards to Station 2

    Station 2
    P1 does 25 monkey humpers
    P2 does chilcutt peter parkers
    When P1 finished, both bear crawl 10 yards to Station 3

    Station 3
    P1 does 25 burpees
    P2 does J-Flecks (J-Lo both sides, then pickle pounder)
    When P1 finished, both bear crawl 10 yards to Station 4

    Station 4
    P1 does 25 coupon thrusters
    P2 does dancing chilcutts

    When P1 finished, partners flapjack and work back through stations

    Mosey around civic center

    Circuit Round 2: Rinse and Repeat
    Mosey around civic center

    2MOM
    Leg lifts
    Freddie Mercury’s 2:1
    Pulsing Supermans? (Goose called them Lois Lanes, so now that is what F3 Thibodaux will call them.)

    After namarama, Goose explained the tank top. YHC couldn’t help saying an internal prayer of gratitude. Had Goose meant to wear it without any explanation, our friendship would have been examined more carefully. In the end, Goose, always thinking about how to serve the PAX, announced (mandated, commanded) that after each beatdown the ANIMAL tank top would be bestowed upon the PAX that most exemplified the nature of an animal.

    Or maybe it was the PAX that most sounded like an animal? Maybe it was the PAX that best blew ass like an animal? What constitutes the definition of a “beatdown ANIMAL” is still unclear. In Enron’s case, perhaps it represents the PAX that taunts the Form Police most like an animal. But again, I have no clear evidence.

    COT and Cardinal reminded YHC he needed to pick someone to pray. Thus, Cardinal prayed us out.

    Always grateful for each of you and your willingness to push through to your inner animal.

    SYITG,

    Yankee Joe