F3 New Orleans

Tag: Barely Legal

  • Paul Bunyan ain’t my name but chopping wood is the game. – from Fletch

    Warmup: SSH’s, windmills, merkins, seal jacks, grass grabbers, shoulder taps and imperial walkers.
    Grabbing some coupons we moseyed to the parking lot on side the woodwrights shop. We continued with 10 IC curls for the girls and shoulder presses.
    Thang:15 Wood chops on a tractor tire with a sledgehammer. Upon completion that pax would shout out an exercise for the rest to perform while he moseyed around the block with his coupon. Following the first pax the next in line would start chopping wood while we performed the exercises etc., till we completed 4 rounds. Returning to the Gipper, with a good sweat worked up, Barely Legal prayed us out. Thanks for letting me lead. Much respect for these men.

  • The Merkin Trap, Episode 4: The Search for Plutonium – from Akbar

    Admiral Gail Akbar of the Mon Calamari returns to the Northshore Mothership once again, to fight another battle against Darth Fartsack and the Sad Clown Empire. His secret mission this trip is to investigate the galactical mystery of Plutonium, reportedly found in the NOLA area by some beast named Hawgcycle. The commander of the Rebel forces knew this human was clever and dangerous – using words like isotopes, casualties, retrospect, and defecate in past correspondence about this discovery. He was at this beatdown before, maybe he would return. Key reinforcements – Baby Yoda, Bushwacker, Pickaxe, Chainsaw, and Shooter were missing. But we had new blood to make up the difference – a burly man named Cathe, with medical-surgical powers specializing in catheters, and a visiting pirate from Cape Fear named Teach. We were pleased with our chances.

    The Admiral received this note before his journey:

    Before night falls on this long winter day,
    A shining sword must find its way
    Into your hands and out of the gloom—
    Or Admiral Akbar shall meet his doom.
    To begin your quest for the Sword of Light,
    Call for the help of another to get right.
    You can always depend on an F3 brother,
    As Iron Sharpens Iron, so one man sharpens another.

    PAX

    Waterpik, Dangerfield, Freon, Bubba, Moby Dick, Bean, Russo, Jose 10k, Barely Legal, Speedy, Grundy, Bird, Zoolander, Maverick, Akbar, Hammer, Junior Varsity, Cathe (FNG), Teach

    Conditions – 40ish, no wind, a little foggy

    Warm Up – Arm Circles (F/B), Self-Love, Imperial Walkers, Grass Grabbers

    Thang

    Mosey up and down the Lakefront stopping for 2 exercises in each set, one of which would always be Merkins. 12, 8, 5 IC or 24,16,10 OYO. Each set = 50 Merkins, and most were 50 of another exercise except for a couple done Copperhead style.

    1 – Flag SSH, Merkins
    2 – Rips Calf Raises, Wide Merkin
    3 – Parking stripes Lunge walk, 5 Merkins every 2nd stripe
    4 – Noah Wall Tempo Freak Nasties, Dirkin
    5 – Grass Circle Al Gore/Shoulder raise, Wide Merkin
    6 – Wall Copperhead Squats, Irkin
    7 – Grass Circle Scuba Steve, Stone Mountain
    8 – Grass Circle Al Gore/Shoulder raise, Merkin
    9 – Noah Wall Scuba Steve, Diamond Irkin
    10 – Rips Twinkle Toes, Prime Time Merkin
    11 – Flag Little Manny Crunches, Merkin

    Total 550 Merkins

    Mary – x10 IC

    Fire Hydrants, Leg Raises, Hello Dolly, LBC’s, Lay flat on your back for 1 minute, time called

    Count-o-rama, Name-o-rama. Welcome FNG Cathe! Pronounced Cathy

    Announcements

    – Run Cajun Run, log your mileage
    – Hammer, Grundy, Steve, and Tanked Up! have put together a team to support The
    Nehemiah Project. They will run 48 miles over 48 hours on March 18th at Fontainebleau
    State Park. Check Slack for more.
    – Bird has the Q next Saturday

    COT

    YHC prayed us out with thoughts of words like man, father, husband, brother, friend – all verbs – and to take action this week remembering to flex our heart muscle. Don’t forget tomorrow is Valentine’s Day

    Alas, the Admiral did not find Plutonium, or Hawcycle, or the Sword of Light. But what he did find was a group of men who sharpened each other – enjoying camaraderie, food, and a hot cup of coffee for their efforts. Sad, but undaunted, he shall return next year.

    Thanks for letting me lead, and for following.

    SYITG – Admiral Akbar

    NMM

    Of all days to be late, YHC misplaced the keys and had to hall butt to make it there just in time to start.

    Great to have Teach from F3 Cape Fear make the drive from Gulfport while working out of town for a while.

    Bird brought Ian, a FNG who we named Cathe, pronounced Cathy, he works in med devices sales with vascular catheters.

    YHC had to modify pretty quickly after the Dirkins in the 4th set – in which QIC almost face planted from exhaustion. The plan was to go all the way to the playground and work my way back, but time forced a modification. We still got in around 550 Merkins in an hour

    Grundy showed up late, half way through, and owes 250 Merkins.

    I’ve been reading a lot of Jack and Annie books with the kids, and the poem came from a Merlin Mystery novel. I have to admit, these books are great – historical fiction and mystery combined. Kids and adults alike will love them. Sometimes, the book titles become backblast titles.

    The Plutonium reference came from the master backblast writer himself, Hawcycle. Look back and read it, it’s good stuff.

    Coffeeteria was great, this time including more King Cake, breakfast bowls, and my 2.0’s showed up for sugar and hot chocolate.

  • Never have I ever (Yes I have!) – from Russo

    Disclaimer: yes, most of this was written well ahead of time, Zoolander, and copied and pasted, edited, and spellchecked (I think).

    30 degrees greeted a Pax of 13 this morning, perfect sunrise, a little chilly from the remnants of rain.

    Too cold to be called a Warmup (all IC, between 10 and 25x)
    – Sealjacks
    – Good mornings
    – High knees
    – Cherry pickers
    – Grass grabbers
    – Self love
    – Imperial walkers

    Thangs before the Thang
    (1) Mosey down Girod, stopping every block or so for some Ro-Cham-Burpee (10 rounds of rock, paper, scissors, the winner performs merkins, the loser burpees)

    Things we learned:
    – Zoolander and Jose were “pretty even” through 2 rounds
    – Guinea Pig had incredible fortune until he ran into the buzzsaw of YHC’s scissors
    – The ground is cold without gloves

    (2) Card sharks (Complete exercises based on card count, next round guess higher or lower, a correct guess multiplies the rep 2x, incorrect 3x)
    – Crab cakes
    – Scissor kicks
    – Peter Parker’s
    – Big boi situps
    – Plank jacks
    – American hammers
    – Murder bunnies
    – Monkey humpers

    Things we learned:
    – Murder bunnies are a favorite of YHC
    – The deck was most certainly not stacked to finish on an Ace (with a 3x multiplier)
    – Guinea Pig played great strategy on the 10
    – Jose redeemed himself with higher/lower

    Thang

    YHC is not what one would call creative. Completely left-brained, my world revolves around number and order and sequence. I struggle to keep beatdowns fresh. Most of my planning is either “that’s a good idea, let’s modify that” or “what’s a game I’ve played that can be transformed into a beatdown?” The latter held true for a spirited and, at times, confusing, game of:

    Never have I ever (Q calls out an action, If you’ve done said action, move to one side. If not, move to the other. Exercise and rep count will vary based on what side you’re on)

    Actions (“Yes” first exercise listed, “No”second one listed, most of them look right, there was some modification)

    (1) Q’ed the Mothership – 10 merkins, 5 burpees

    (2) Fartsacked a Q – 10 burpees, 10 merkins

    (3) Intentionally run a red light – 10 burpees, 15 squats

    (4) Picked up the 6 – 3 calf raises, 15 SMCs

    (5) Fallen asleep at work – 25 hallelujah squats, 5 Peter Parker’s

    (6) Called a partner the wrong name – 10 donkey kicks, 5 arm circles

    (7) Cut my own or someone else’s hair – 10 merkins, 20 SSH

    (8) Dated a friend’s ex – lap around Granny’s, 5 merkins

    (9) Stopped to help some with roadside car trouble – 5 jump squats, 25 Apollo Ohnos

    (10) Let someone cut in line in front of me – 10 mountain climbers, 10 burpees

    (11) Played wordle – bear crawl, mosey

    (12) Slept in my car – 20 star jumps, 10 arm circles

    (13) Hit a parked car – 20 groiners, 5 merkins

    (14) Sent an inappropriate text or message to the wrong person – 5 burpees, 5 merkins

    (15) Been frisked or in a police car – 30 squats, 10 cherry pickers

    (16) Removed an inappropriate amount of clothes in public – 10 burpees, 1 burpee

    Things we learned:
    – Too many lawyers in the Pax. We had to define “partner”, “hit”, “date”, “mothership”, “intentional”, as well as clarify what is meant by “inappropriate” and “slept”
    – Even after 16 rounds, some of us aren’t really sure which side to go to
    – There were at least two people who found themselves on the side I didn’t expect them to be on (Names redacted, let the speculation commence)
    – Other things that should not be broadcast here to protect the innocent
    – Best line of the Thang (paraphrased): I paid for that 20 years ago and now Russo is making me pay for it again.

    After enough absolution, Pax moseyed back to the flag in a modified Indian run where the lead runner peels off and heads to the back.

    COT, Name-o-Rama, announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    Announcements
    – HogsBreath and Pass Interference are planting the Slidell flag on Monday at 5:30!
    – Hammer is pulling together a fundraiser for the Nehemiah Project in mid-March. I’ll let him provide more details on this worthy cause.
    – There were multiple prayer requests, including friends and family of Akbar, Bubba, Bird, and Jose, so a focus of our prayer was on mental/physical health and God’s gifts of healing, comfort, mercy, and peace.

    One final word on something Bubba brought up:

    There is an awful lot we shoulder every day: work, family, commitments, temptation, life’s difficulties, you name it. We may tend to bottle up stress or pressure until we just can’t take it anymore.

    Most of us have found F3 to be a release of some of that pressure. We’ve stumbled upon a group that, despite our imperfections, will absolutely stand tall in the face of adversity and stand with our brothers. I thank God every day for this group, and each of the men that have helped to shape me into a better human being. You are all leading by example and my prayer is that we do that for everyone around us.

    Maybe you pick up the 6 more, or reach out to ask how something went for someone this week. Maybe you share your Q source, and then make sure it gets read. Maybe you spend a couple hours to drop everything and help someone move. There are countless other examples that I hope we have and can point to when things get tough. There are too many other examples for me to list.

    If anyone is struggling, reach out. My ear is always ready to be bent. SYITG 🤛🏼

  • Panxsutawney Phil and The Gipper – from TurboTax

    Panxsutawney Phil saw his shadow this morning which implies some sunlight which, in turn, confirms that he was nowhere near The Gipper. Conditions for our beatdown were Gloomy to say the least.

    Plenty of shelter at The Gipper. After a warmup featuring lots of dynamic stretching, skipping, bear crawling, lunging, squatting, crab walking and running, the PAX made our way to the crescent for a EMOM extravaganza. Burpees, merkins, mountain climbers, Sister Mary Katherines, Apollo Onos, Bobby Hurleys, and a few different plank variations filled the rest of our time…roughly 30 minutes of increasing intensity. But the PAX weathered the EMOM storm just fine and made a solid downpainment on the day.

    Thanks for letting me lead guys. Hope to see you all out there for the Krazy Ivan Thursday night.

  • HUMP day!! By the way Moby, what are you wearing? – from Shooter

    Having missed the last few Gipper beatdowns, YHC knew he had no excuses if he took the Q… Meeting up with Steve at our WD location to carpool. Minus one of our other brethren in Bushwacker the ride produced some small talk and not the normal rambles of chatter on the drive north.. Upon arrival Steve and YHC noticed we were the first at the AO until the likes of Barely legal came rolling in.. After planting the shovel flag the 3 of us started out for a pre miler running through the streets of beautiful Covington talking some sports and mumbling about the upcoming challenge that one (unnamed) of our own is setting out to achieve.. Although the insanity of the challenge he has bestowed upon himself seems impossible, the 3 of us all agreed it will be accomplished knowing the natural desire and determination of this individual.. Beware Covington of possible Wolverine sightings in your future!! Returning to the shovel flag 4 more PAX, plus Sonny awaited as we started in our warmup..

    All 15IC SSH, Toe Touches, Cherry Pickers, Arm circles, Imperial walkers, Hillbillies and Butt kicks…

    YHC chose 2 coupon workouts from the Exicon, so we gathered our blocks then returned under the breezeway for FLORA 123.. Partnering up we completed the 100 200 and 300 rep count of Derkins, planks, LBCs, 6inch holds, Goblet squats and holds..
    Sonny was extra motivated on this Gloom as he tried getting in some of his own versions of Monkey Humpers with mans best friend.. Not sure where the motivation came from but maybe it was the cologne or soap, which prompted other PAX to inquire about the secret aroma for potential attractant at home with the M… Not sure if it would work but let’s just say it was in the air at the Gipper on this day with the abundance of attempts displayed by ole Sonny (Turbo dawg) on this HUMP day!!!
    After finishing we took our blocks to the parking area/boat yard soon to be attorneys office for the finale.
    Gorilla Complex was on tap with one modification. YHC was not sure of one of the said exercises in the rotation, so substituted Rows instead.. The just is 8 rounds of 5 exercises with 8 reps followed by a 50 yard sprint between each round.. With coupon 8 curls, 8 rows, 8 shoulder presses, 8 squat thrusters and 8 Merkins then sprint/mosey for 50 yards.. R/R 8x

    Hope you got your monies worth gentleman and until the next Gloom 👍🏼👊🏼✌🏼!!

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  • Tribute to Bobby Hurley – from TurboTax

    YHC is no Duke fan. He’s a Georgia fan like Yankee. Go Dawgs! But that didn’t stop YHC from paying a tribute of sorts to the Duke basketball star this morning.

    After a quick warmup of seal jacks, shoulder taps, imperial walkers, Peter Parkers, hillbillies, Parker Peters, SSHs, and merkins, the PAX made its way to the back of the Justice Center for the first of two AMRAPS.

    7 minutes of Bobby Hurleys, broken up into sets of five by a trip up and down the rear Justice Center stairs.

    Bear crawl/merkins and lunge walk/Bobby Hurleys through Oak Alley to the front of the Justice Center for the second AMRAP.

    7 minutes of hand release merkins, broken up into sets of five by a trip of crossover runs up and down the front Justice Center stairs.

    Another trip down Oak Alley…this time sprint/coast and crab walk/crab cakes.

    Mosey back to the Shovel Flag for some Mary. Front plank, Jane Fondas, Scuba Steves, more shoulder taps, Nolan Ryans and finally some dynamic back planks.

    Good work this morning guys. Thanks as always for letting me lead.

  • Blockheads – from TurboTax

    Seven blockheads with a combined age of over 370 years posted at The Gipper this morning. Bean and Cowbell usually lower our average age, but they both fartsacked. So we beat ourselves up without them.

    Warmup of Merkins, Seal Jacks, Peter Parkers, Side Straddle Hops, Mountain Climbers, Imperial Walkers, Shoulder Taps, Hillbillies, J Lo’s, and 10 burpees then we grabbed our blocks and headed over to the Boatyard for the main event.

    3 cones 15 yards apart.

    Partnered up and partner one carried both partners’ blocks 30 yards to the 3rd cone and back while partner two performed burpees, flap jack until the partners reach 50 total burpees.

    OH carry with 50 hand release Merkins.

    Bear block crawls with 100 Bobby Hurleys.

    Lunge/frog jumps with block around the worlds.

    Bear crawl/jogs with block figure 8s.

    And between each round we hit some agility drills and sprints with a grand finale of two all out sprints before heading back to the shovel flag.

    Great work this morning guys. Pretty good for a bunch of old dudes. Thanks for letting me lead.

  • Nashville Grinder – from Akbar

    8 plus YHC in a warm gloom this morning, completely opposite from the first time I experienced this beatdown in Nashville 2 years ago – 17 degrees and snowing. The results were the same, we all got better today.

    Warm up: ICx 10-15 SSH, Self-Love, Imperial Walkers, High Knees, Grass Grabbers, Arm Circles (f/b)

    The Thang went like this:

    6 exercises, 10 reps each. Once completed, run to Beck N Call and back or block carry around the Gipper. Return and add 1 rep each round.

    Squat Press
    Derkins
    1 arm block Row –
    Tricep extensions
    Squrls – Squat + Curl
    Block hold leg raise

    There are advantages and disadvantages on the run or carry. Some stuck with 1 or the other, some mixed it up. Most got 6-7 rounds in, 400+ reps. We went until 6:40, returned the blocks, and it was time for 3MOM.

    Mary: IC x 10-15 Leg raises, Hello Dolly, Rosalita, LBC

    Count, Namorama, Zoolander prayed us out.

    Announcements:

    – Tanked Up has New Year’s Day Lakefront Q, 6:30am
    – Krazy Ivan, Thursday Feb 3rd, 8pm Lakefront
    – Run Cajun Run starts Feb 1
    – Franco’s Ice Man Dip and Dash. 10am at Franco’s

    Was great to Q the Gipper again, thanks for letting me lead,
    Akbar

  • Reindeer Games – from Russo

    Temperature was down to 37 this morning at the Gipper, which was not quite low enough for a winter wonderland (or sleeves for YHC), but cold enough for some reindeer games.

    As a kid, if you asked me what the best part of Christmas was, the easy answer was presents. From Legend of Zelda II: Adventures of Link to a Commodore 64 and its floppy disks, from Castle Grayskull to Optimus Prime, nothing beat the joy of ripping open wrapping paper, fumbling to tear apart boxes, and hoping you wouldn’t have to deal with the nightmare of shrink wrap. I got really, really good at feigning joy when clothes or books were the end result.

    As I got older, the best part of Christmas (besides the whole Jesus in a manger thing) moved from gifts to sleeping late because there was no school for two whole weeks, then to holiday parties, and then again to where it currently resides: eating. And more eating. And then eating some more.

    But because the gifts are a staple of the holidays, YHC was in a giving mood today, serving as the MC for a few rounds of Dirty Santa!

    Warmup (All IC, either 12x or 21x to honor today’s date as a palindrome – 12-22-21)
    – Seal jacks (not plank jacks)
    – SSH
    – Cherry pickers
    – Grass grabbers
    – Imperial walkers

    Thang
    Your basic Dirty Santa / White Elephant. The rules are simple:
    (1) Each HIM picks a number.
    (2) Number 1 picks a random gift/exercise from Santa’s bag (in this case, Santa was slumming it with a quart sized Ziploc) and performs said exercise while the other HIM perform the standard (e.g. merkins).
    (3) Number 2 has a choice: Number 1’s chosen exercise, the standard, or a new “gift”. If he chooses either of the first two options, the one who had their “gift” stolen can steal or select another mystery “gift”.
    (4) Around and around we go, until all HIM have a chance to select.

    The “gifts”:
    -10 merkins
    -20 jump squats
    -30 squats
    -8 Hand release merkins
    -20 hello dollies
    -20 leg lifts
    -30 monkey humpers
    -25 plank jacks
    -4 krakken burpees
    -8 SMCs
    -15 murder bunnies
    -20 bear crawls
    -10 diamond merkins
    -50 high knees
    -24 Apollo ohnos
    -15 scissor kicks
    -12 star jumps
    -20 freak nastys
    -1 burpee
    -2 calf raises
    -20 hip slappers
    -12 hallelujah squats
    -2 gas pumps
    -33 cherry pickers
    -6 donkey kicks

    Between rounds, Pax also moseyed around the courthouse and square to provide for some strategizing.

    A mosey back to home base, COT, name-o-rama, announcements and prayer closed us out.

    T claps to Fletch for also playing Santa and gifting us with his famous hot sauce.

    I don’t often have a chance to make the Gipper because of weekly commitments, so I appreciate you all joining me and letting me lead you all.

    One final note: I had an opportunity to watch The Chosen’s Christmas program, and the theme was “People must know”. People must know about the wonder of the Nativity, and who Jesus is, and how blessed we are with a Savior.

    My goal in the new year is to use that theme of “People must know”, not only regarding the gospel, but also about the benefits of F3. We all know them, and have been EH’ed at some point, and if you’re reading this, it stuck with you. I challenge us to continue the EHs, step out of our comfort zones, and spread the word.

    SYITG