F3 New Orleans

Tag: Safety Valve

  • Free Solo 2: Struggler’s Run – from America’s Best

    YHC pulled up at least 7 or 8 minutes early to find overly-zealous Enron and Paradox at the Stage, arriving early to gossip. The rest of the PAX poured in, slowly, gradually, like some sort of sweet viscous substance…

    Warmarama – typical SSH, toy soldiers, windmills, arm circles, then a curve ball… butt-kicks straight into high knees? For some men, the muscle memory kicked in, and the knees went up before the brains even knew what was happening. Overall, there seemed to be a very mixed reaction to this, and YHC was afraid for a moment there may be a Q coup.

    Pre-thang:
    Last time YHC put on a “Free Solo” beatdown, we had extra time and went into an OT “make it stop” name that tune-athon. Due to this, and with RCR coming up, YHC decided to start this one with a run.
    Indian Run while the Wu-Thang plunked out music of mostly bands with misleading names. The goal is to guess how many band members are in said band. The difference between your guess and the actual is the number of exercises we do at each stop.
    Popeye impressed, calling out Arcade Fire immediately, and them even more impressively, MJ knew (or guessed?) that there were 5 members. No extra work!
    The Thompson Twins were next, and of course the trick was that there are 3 members, but we only had to do one merkin, as Wet Tap was called upon and (understandably) guessed 2.
    Next we nurred, as a hint, hoping someone could guess “Feels like we Only Go Backwards” by Tame Impala. The guess was 4, but there is only one member in this “band.” We did 3 BBS.
    The next was my favorite, and it was even better because we had already done BBS and merkins, so the next had to be burpees. Nobody knew the Polyphonic Spree song (also titled “Hold Me Now”) so our buy in was 5 burpees.
    Pope was called upon to be the scapegoat (by the way, the person who was randomly chosen to guess each time was the person who happened to stop closest to the streetlight).
    Pope guessed 5 (I think, or 8), but there are 27 members of this ridiculous band, so either way it was Samsonite. So we did a lot of burpees.
    Goose nailed Bungle in the Jungle by Jethro Tull, and someone (Enron) knew there were 4 members. No extra work. Honeysuckle called Superman by Five for Fighting, but Dox thought there were most likely 5 members of this one-man band.

    Back at the start for the Real Thang: FREE SOLO 2
    The Rules: A solo from a song is played while we all do some kind of work. The song is curated for a single individual in the attending PAX. 3 things with slightly different results occur:
    1. The person for whom the song was chosen IDs the song. Result= all PAX bear crawl 20 yards “free” of gear (coupon), then lunge walk back. Everyone takes “victory lap.”
    2. Some other dude identifies the song, freeing himself from the burden of the coupon. Everyone else block-bears up and lunge-walks with coupon back. Dude takes a victory lap while rest of PAX continues work.
    3. Nobody IDs the song everyone murder-bunnies up, and rifle carries back, then does “sprint of defeat” to flag and back

    As we began, Wet Tap busted out of the gates like a thing that busts out of gates busting out of a gate.
    He ID’d the first two songs without even knowing what was happening, stealing Dox’s and Pope’s songs as well as Pope’s thunder. And he took 2 victory laps in a row while we continued the work.
    Popeye’s musical chops impressed again, identifying his solo from “When Doves Cry.”
    YHC was downright giddy when he saw Goldilox pull in this morning… I’ve been waiting to play this smooth jazz sax solo from “Too Hot.” Nobody knew the song… I guess all these Millennials think “Kool and the Gang” is just something Samuel L. Jackson said. (And in case you missed it, “too hot” is something Goldilocks said).
    Enron ID’d “Money” but YHC suspects fowl play. No, not foul.
    “Honeybee” Tom Petty. Nobody knows that old fart, apparently.
    For the fledgling pilot, “Learning to Fly.” Again. Free Solo 1 brought us this song by old fart Tom Petty. This time, same title, different song, different band. Nobody knew it.
    Overall, I know, too much Pink Floyd.
    Evident next during what is arguably one of the best and most recognizable guitar solos ever. As we did thrusters, Goose prodded Wet Tap to ID “Comfortably Numb.”
    Tap’s response: “I’d rather just keep doing Thrusters.”
    (Time ran out before Dilly’s and MJ’s songs could be unveiled… to be concluded)

    COT: Count-o-rama, Name-o-rama,

    Animal was bestowed upon Picadilly.

    Honey-o-rama courtesy of The Beekeeper (aka Honeysuckle)

    Thanks for putting up with my nonsense once again, fellas.

    SYITG,
    AB

  • Free Solo 2: Struggler’s Run – from America’s Best

    YHC pulled up at least 7 or 8 minutes early to find overly-zealous Enron and Paradox at the Stage, arriving early to gossip. The rest of the PAX poured in, slowly, gradually, like some sort of sweet viscous substance…

    Warmarama – typical SSH, toy soldiers, windmills, arm circles, then a curve ball… butt-kicks straight into high knees? For some men, the muscle memory kicked in, and the knees went up before the brains even knew what was happening. Overall, there seemed to be a very mixed reaction to this, and YHC was afraid for a moment there may be a Q coup.

    Pre-thang:
    Last time YHC put on a “Free Solo” beatdown, we had extra time and went into an OT “make it stop” name that tune-athon. Due to this, and with RCR coming up, YHC decided to start this one with a run.
    Indian Run while the Wu-Thang plunked out music of mostly bands with misleading names. The goal is to guess how many band members are in said band. The difference between your guess and the actual is the number of exercises we do at each stop.
    Popeye impressed, calling out Arcade Fire immediately, and them even more impressively, MJ knew (or guessed?) that there were 5 members. No extra work!
    The Thompson Twins were next, and of course the trick was that there are 3 members, but we only had to do one merkin, as Wet Tap was called upon and (understandably) guessed 2.
    Next we nurred, as a hint, hoping someone could guess “Feels like we Only Go Backwards” by Tame Impala. The guess was 4, but there is only one member in this “band.” We did 3 BBS.
    The next was my favorite, and it was even better because we had already done BBS and merkins, so the next had to be burpees. Nobody knew the Polyphonic Spree song (also titled “Hold Me Now”) so our buy in was 5 burpees.
    Pope was called upon to be the scapegoat (by the way, the person who was randomly chosen to guess each time was the person who happened to stop closest to the streetlight).
    Pope guessed 5 (I think, or 8), but there are 27 members of this ridiculous band, so either way it was Samsonite. So we did a lot of burpees.
    Goose nailed Bungle in the Jungle by Jethro Tull, and someone (Enron) knew there were 4 members. No extra work. Honeysuckle called Superman by Five for Fighting, but Dox thought there were most likely 5 members of this one-man band.

    Back at the start for the Real Thang: FREE SOLO 2
    The Rules: A solo from a song is played while we all do some kind of work. The song is curated for a single individual in the attending PAX. 3 things with slightly different results occur:
    1. The person for whom the song was chosen IDs the song. Result= all PAX bear crawl 20 yards “free” of gear (coupon), then lunge walk back. Everyone takes “victory lap.”
    2. Some other dude identifies the song, freeing himself from the burden of the coupon. Everyone else block-bears up and lunge-walks with coupon back. Dude takes a victory lap while rest of PAX continues work.
    3. Nobody IDs the song everyone murder-bunnies up, and rifle carries back, then does “sprint of defeat” to flag and back

    As we began, Wet Tap busted out of the gates like a thing that busts out of gates busting out of a gate.
    He ID’d the first two songs without even knowing what was happening, stealing Dox’s and Pope’s songs as well as Pope’s thunder. And he took 2 victory laps in a row while we continued the work.
    Popeye’s musical chops impressed again, identifying his solo from “When Doves Cry.”
    YHC was downright giddy when he saw Goldilox pull in this morning… I’ve been waiting to play this smooth jazz sax solo from “Too Hot.” Nobody knew the song… I guess all these Millennials think “Kool and the Gang” is just something Samuel L. Jackson said. (And in case you missed it, “too hot” is something Goldilocks said).
    Enron ID’d “Money” but YHC suspects fowl play. No, not foul.
    “Honeybee” Tom Petty. Nobody knows that old fart, apparently.
    For the fledgling pilot, “Learning to Fly.” Again. Free Solo 1 brought us this song by old fart Tom Petty. This time, same title, different song, different band. Nobody knew it.
    Overall, I know, too much Pink Floyd.
    Evident next during what is arguably one of the best and most recognizable guitar solos ever. As we did thrusters, Goose prodded Wet Tap to ID “Comfortably Numb.”
    Tap’s response: “I’d rather just keep doing Thrusters.”
    (Time ran out before Dilly’s and MJ’s songs could be unveiled… to be concluded)

    COT: Count-o-rama, Name-o-rama,

    Animal was bestowed upon Picadilly.

    Honey-o-rama courtesy of The Beekeeper (aka Honeysuckle)

    Thanks for putting up with my nonsense once again, fellas.

    SYITG,
    AB

  • 7-11 – from Safety Valve

    The iconic convenience store 7-11 has many similarities to our own 7s and 11s workouts. Always available, usually easy to find and come up with, and can get a multitude of things in a very quick visit. Since most of F3 thibodaux has come to expect some sort of cardio running Q from YHC, things had to be shaken up. How can YHC build a workout that we run or nur for 2 miles while not seeming like we are actually running? 7-11 is the answer.

    Warmaramma
    SSH
    Imperial walkers
    Toy soldiers
    Willy Mae’s Hayes
    Arm circle forward and back
    Cherry pickers

    7s
    Man makers and merkins
    Nur as the mode of transport

    Recovery mosey around the track.

    11s
    Coupon press and jump squats
    Run as the mode of transport

    Recovery mosey around the track.

    7s
    Thrusters and LBCs
    Nur as the mode of transport

    Recovery mosey around the track.

    11s
    Curls and Burpees
    Run as the mode of transport

    This circuit brought us to end right at 6am. COT, intentions and Wet tap prayed us out. Goose VESTED YHC for the no skimp thruster form.

    Final thoughts:
    Often, we start getting comfortable with things in life. Comfort does not allow for growth. As Goose puts it “we do not deserve comfort!” Most recent beatdowns have excluded coupon work, and YHC has been enjoying the body weight and running side of life. It’s easier for me. In the earlier stages in F3 Thibodaux, YHC quickly found that thrusters and man makers were not his jam. They were tough, and at one point YHC said he would never incorporate those into any of his Q workouts. Well… that’s because YHC was soft then. F3 Thibodaux has since made me want that uncomfortable feeling because I know that’s when growth happens. Whether physical, emotional, or spiritual we have to go through those difficult times to learn about ourselves and overcome the struggle. So, keep struggling because it means good things will come out of it in the end. Great to lead this group. Thanks for showing up and working hard.

  • Not in This Life, Sucka! – from Yankee Joe

    “My brethren, consider it a cause of great joy whenever you endure various trials, 3 for you know that the testing of your faith will develop perseverance.4 And let perseverance complete its work so that you may become perfect and complete, and not be deficient in any respect.”

    James 1: 2-4
    ——————————–

    ‘Tis the season of resolutions. New year, new me. Keto diets and less sodas. Time to pass on the second helping of cake and put down the crack pipe.

    For men of faith, it is a season of renewed vigor in our relationship with God. It is a time for reflection, humility, and self denial. We are inclined to pause, take an account, and look up. Words like ‘trust’, ‘surrender’, and ‘vulnerability’ swirl around in our heads, desperately trying to make a connection with our hearts. It’s confusing, frustrating, infuriating, inspiring, exciting, terrifying…

    …at least that’s how YHC has been feeling. Perhaps an outlier, but doubtful.

    As such, heading into this Thursday’s Q at the Lion’s Den, YHC recalled an intriguing idea shared by Goose during the three-year F3 Thib manniversary. He shared that he prayed about his beatdown designs, letting the Lord lead…you know, about what might be best for a group of men… gathered in faith. Crazy, right?

    So, that’s what YHC did. What came was a glaring opportunity to share YHC’s struggles in his faith journey…something that required ‘trust’, ‘surrender’, and ‘vulnerability’. Interesting.

    ———————————

    The beatdown would consist of five rounds, taking the Pax through their own faith journey. The ultimate goal would be to sprint for10 minutes without a break at the end. However, before we could sprint, we needed to learn how to walk, jump, lunge, and crawl.

    As YHC neared completing the design, it was clear that there was a gap. Something was missing. After some more prayer, YHC realized that part of his struggle was…well…prayer.

    So, at the end of each round of the faith journey, YHC needed an exercise that would represent our struggle and growth in our prayer lives. But what? The Exicon offered nothing of substance. Maybe some ‘we’re not worthy’s’, but YHC didn’t want Goose to bring 20 coupons. Prayer pose in squat position? Nope, looked too much like a Buddha stance…like Paradox holding Al Gore.

    THEN, the answer was served up on a plate of spinach with a side of smirk and ‘be all you can be’ snark. Popeye quipped to Paradox that YHC’s Apolo Ohno form was unacceptable. Now, YHC is not an overly sensitive lad, but to publicly challenge another man’s form is a serious accusation and bears the burden of proof in a court of kangaroos.

    Yes, yes, ENRON. I hear you all the way in Mobile…the previous sentence may be the most hypocritical statement ever uttered in F3 Thibodaux. YHC has indeed been known to publicly challenge men about their form. But if it pleases this corrupt court, I offer the following evidence.

    Exhibit A: Montana’s AIR SQUATS (like standing geriatric monkey humpers)

    Exhibit B: Paradox’s MERKIN where his waist touches the ground with arms still fully extended (like ⅓ merkin, ⅓ pickle pounder, ⅓ cobra)

    Exhibit C: Enron’s JUMP ROPE (there is no description…it’s just uncanny)

    Exhibit D: Popeye’s BONNIE BLAIR’s (like a depressed MC Hammer shuffle after learning that Z Cavaricci’s went out of fashion)

    Exhibit E: Cardinal’s ARM CIRCLES just rotating at the elbow…no shoulders required

    Exhibit F: America’s Best’s THRUSTERS where the only thing he’s thrusting is Dave Matthews’ inexplicable existence into our ears. (It’s almost as bad as Dox’s entire catalog of music. Almost.)

    —————————————-

    Ok, so the Apolo Ohno. An Exicon favorite in tribute to the two-time Olympic gold medalist speed skater. YHC was mildly aware that he could put more effort into the exercise, perhaps getting lower to the ground, but it was more of a style choice. That said, after watching a few videos of Mr. Ohno’s form, closely studying the mechanics of his crossover cornering techniques, and asking around (for a friend, of course), the verdict was crystal clear.

    YHC’s form was off. I mean…WAY OFF. Like, Samsonite luggage way off. How did this happen? How did it come to this? Why didn’t anyone say anything before? Just like realizing for the first time that your endowment is only average size…at best, part of my world came tumbling down. A house of cards.

    Regardless, YHC now had his secondary theme to represent the morphing struggle of his prayer life.

    ———————————–
    How It Started

    As we moved through Warmarama, YHC included some Apolo Ohno’s as a teaser before the reveal. Here, it was immediately apparent that YHC’s form had NOT improved since watching the videos. I shushed Goose, pretending it was all part of the plan and we proceeded to the thang.

    The Thang

    For each round, the PAX would endure a stage of their faith journey interrupted by a different take on the Apolo Ohno. The versions were close, but a bit awkward…and though uncomfortable and hard, still somehow enriching.

    Round 1

    – Spider-Man crawl to cone
    – 25 That’s A No-hno – In honor of the No-No king, Nolan Ryan and a nod to landing seven uppercuts to Robin Ventura’s face: Apollo Ohno form on the side crossover, but mimicking the Nolan Ryan arm movements normally done in side plank.
    – Reverse Spider-Man back to start
    – Chilcutt Peter Parkers to wait for pax

    ————————————-

    So here we are. At this point, you have made a valiant effort. Excited to launch down a path of walking closer with God, you’ve managed to endure something rather difficult. Then it seems, you find yourself right back where you started.

    However, the question becomes, “Are you? Are you right back where you started?” For YHC, it often feels like running in circles or like taking two steps forward and 100 back. That said, regardless of where you are (physically, spiritually, psychologically), have you taken the time to reflect on where you’ve just been? Are you sure you haven’t grown? Learned? Armed with some shaky, hesitant confidence, you keep fighting the good fight. You might try to take on more though it may feel like sometimes your legs are being cut out from under you.

    Round 2

    – Boo boo bear crawl (three legged) with left leg up to cone
    – 25 Only Bo-noh’s – commemorating one of the greatest dual threats in history, Bo Jackson. Specifically, in memory of that time when he broke a bat over his head after striking out!
    Arms up on either side of head pulling down like breaking a bat over your head
    – Boo boo bear crawl with right leg back to start
    – Chilcutt Peter Parkers to wait for pax

    ————————————–

    Once again, you find yourself seemingly (and frustratingly) near where you started. You’ve suffered a bit more, limping along. This time, however, you are perhaps a bit more willing to pause and reflect. Maybe you acknowledge that you may not have to be in such a hurry. You’re starting to actually consider at a deeper level the concepts of ‘trust’, ‘surrender’, and ‘sacrifice’. The initial euphoria has started to ebb. You move forward, but with caution and A LOT more questions. As such, you take long, slow strides (with knees TOUCHING the ground, Popeye).

    Round 3

    – Flying nuns to cone
    – 25 Ronnie Oh Hell-nohs – In acknowledgement of Enron’s impeccable merkins form and impressive prowess…On either side of the crossover side step, drop down for a merkin (50 total merkins)
    – Reverse flying nun to start
    – Chilcutt Peter Parkers to wait for pax

    ——————————————–

    “And David danced before the Lord with all his might…” 2 Samuel 6:14

    At this point, you only thought your journey had been difficult. The last experience was a wake-up call: It can get a lot tougher. It nearly killed you.

    Except, it didn’t kill you. Actually, as you reflect (more naturally now), you realize that it wasn’t that bad. Not only did you persevere, you feel stronger. What’s more is that you realize you might have even liked the struggle. Not from a sense of misguided martyrdom, but rather from a place of genuine humility. Whoa. What am I going to do now? It’s a new kind of scary. Perhaps there is a sense of empowerment derived not from pride, but from freedom. Real freedom. If you’re like YHC, you’re skeptical, you fight the urge to give in. This ‘surrender’ is even more terrifying when you realize you might be capable of letting go. Regardless, you’re fired up, but you don’t know how to run. Not yet. So you leap.

    “…the baby leaped in her womb…” Luke 1: 41

    Round 4

    – Broad jumps to cone
    – 25 Yankee Jeaux-noh’s – Jump squat in between each ohno for a total of 25 jump squats.
    – Crab walk back to start
    – Chilcutt Peter Parkers to wait for pax

    —————————————-

    “Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”

    Romans 5: 3-5

    It is time to stand up. You are ready to run, while thanking God for the gift of wisdom to know when you should crawl. And the courage to do so. You may realize that these trials were and will always be part of the journey. Like Job, you might start to look at the setbacks as a Grace. For YHC, the distractions are not borne from difficulty, but rather because I put those things first. What if…just what if I were to give God the first fruits? Give Him all of it?

    You’re ready to run. You can stop whenever you feel like it. Whenever you feel like you have no more room to grow and that you’ve arrived at the pinnacle of your existence.

    You can stop.

    BUTTTT…you’re a man! You need metrics. You track outcomes. You crave structure. You compete to reach a destination. It might occur to you that there IS NO destination. There is no finish line. There is no rest. Well…we are promised that there is…

    …but not in this life, Sucka.

    Round 5

    – Sprint to embankment (approx. 60 yards) and crawl up hill
    – Let Your Yes Be Yes and Your No Be No-hno’s – 25 Apolo Ohno’s…real, authentic, perfectly formed Apolo Ohno’s
    – Sprint back to start
    – Repeato until time is called (approx. 10 minutes)

    ——————————————

    COT, ANIMAL went to MOM JEANS, and Honeysuckle prayed us out.

    Final Thought

    As I was demonstrating the broad jump squats in Round 4, I snarkily warned against incorrect form. I showed what poor form looked like. Then, I attempted to demonstrate the correct form. I then proceeded to FULLY bust my backside and landed flat on my six.

    Humility is a moving target. Once you think you got it, it’s gone.

    SYITG,

    Yankee Jeaux

  • Pardon the Interruption – from Honeysuckle

    On an unseasonably warm Tuesday Tuff morning, YHC arrived early to the Stage only to find Goose and Pope already waiting. So the fact that there were some exercises written down on paper was not going to be a surprise to them. But Jankee Joe, Safety Valve, and Goldilox arrived after YHC hid the sheet. Still, nobody knew what was about to happen. The warmarama began

    SSH, WMH, WM, IW, ACF/R, CP, TS, HK, BK

    Then the PAX moseyed to the start of Rich Man’s Loop and began an Indian Run with a 2-burpee drop off. This was done for the entire mile. Yankee Joe did in fact make it the whole mile, so he may be in better shape for RCR than he thinks. In the homestretch, a svelte figure emerged from the gloom and he revealed himself to be Smooth Operator coming in hot.

    Back at the Stage, YHC fetched the exercise list and described the 2-man Dora. 120 each of

    Shoulder tap merkins
    Tempo squats
    World War I situps
    Crab Humper / Crab Dip
    Reverse Crunch
    Bonnie Blairs

    While the second team member ran around the sidewalk around the field.

    This sounds straightforward enough, but there was a wrinkle to this Thang. Both the team member doing the exercise and the team member running would be subjected to interruptions. The exercising team member had to listen out for an EMOM beep, at which point he has to do two burpees before continuing on with the exercises.

    The running team member would only have to contend with the Hwy 308 traffic. For every vehicle that passed (most PAX also included vehicles exiting the subdivision), independent of where on the loop you might be, one burpee had to be performed.

    This was to challenge the PAX’s mental endurance as much as physical. The EMOM interruptions were clearly coming every minute, so everyone knew what to expect and when to expect them. That did not make handling the interruptions any easier, though. The highway interruptions were in an unknown quantity and interval. Let’s just say traffic was heavy this morning.

    The combination of planned and unplanned interruptions resonates with YHC following a week with a planned work trip, disrupting YHC’s own schedule as well as the family’s, plus several other unplanned issues that seem to be piling up. In other words, life, and we all can relate to it.

    The PAX wisely let the annoyance and tiredness wash over them as it was often hard to get momentum during the run portion. For example, picture a line of five cars passing, but after the five burpees were completed, only a single step could be taken before yet another car passed. And then another single step. Smooth Operator had a Lieutenant Dan moment when he was frequently seen mocking the highway for even more cars to pass.

    Due to time, the exercise quantity was reduced so we could finish, but no one was really upset about that. In fact, a determined Safety Valve was able to start and finish all the Crab Dips before Smooth and I (throuple) returned from the run. As per usual, Goose, Pope, Lox, and YJ crushed the beatdown but in lieu of planking YHC politely asked everyone to continue with the Hwy 308 burpees until time was called.

    Announcements, prayer intentions, Lox prayed us out.

    As always, it is a privilege to be a part of this group that continues to challenge and push each other to be better in every facet of life.

    SYITG,
    Honeysuckle

  • Tribute: Bishop Mario Dorsonville – from Goose

    YHC was in the process of building a fun Saturday beatdown when Cardinal called with some devastating news: Bishop Dorsonville had passed away at 6:50pm from complications due to to treatment of liver issues. He had been dealing with a lot of pretty major medical stuff over the past couple of months, but he wasn’t anywhere near death, so this came as a shock to everyone. After some time grieving with the M and connecting with friends and family, YHC knew there was still a beatdown to be built for the morning, and the original theme wasn’t gonna work anymore. A solid tribute would be the only appropriate way to move forward.

    F3 tributes are usually put together for fallen soldiers or policemen killed in the line of duty, and they’re defined by a single, very difficult routine that provides for maximum effort to honor the fallen. Though not a soldier or a policeman, Bishop Mario Dorsonville offered his life deeply and continuously for the people of the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux in a uniquely heroic way, and his untimely death deserves such a tribute.

    When he was named Bishop of Houma-Thibodaux, he had no idea where it was or what to expect, but he accepted it as the Lord’s will and resolutely headed this way. After his installation, he told me (on multiple occasions and with deep, passionate sincerity) that this was not going to be a stop on the way to a bigger assignment for him. He had already made up his mind and had communicated to his superiors that these would be his people for the rest of his life. These would be the people to whom he would belong, and they would belong to him until his death or retirement. He had no family left on earth outside of some distant relatives back in Colombia, and he didn’t know anyone here. But, he quickly connected with YHC’s family and with Cardinal and his family. Cardinal would become his secretary, his right hand man in all things, his brother in every sense of the word, his companion on the journey. We just had no idea the journey would be so short.

    The PAX gathered in the cold gloom and YHC was grateful to sink into what has become a strong brotherhood, a team of HIMs defined by gratitude and humble grit. It was nice to enter that circle and let the chatter wash over us. YHC could tell the 2.0’s were grateful for that, too–they were close with Bishop, like an uncle, and they had just received the hard news that morning in the truck on the way there.

    A warmup of the usuals, including the introduction of what YHC labeled “Lafayette Nightclubs”, a weird but extremely effective arm exercise experienced in Lafayette a couple of weeks ago (they called them “Moroccan Night Clubs”, but anyone who’s been to Morocco knows better). It starts with hands up, elbows down at your sides, then extend up and outward about 45 degrees before coming back down. This one’s quickly becoming one of YHC’s favorites since it works out an area that’s been hard to loosen up.
    Also, Duke unwittingly provided some comic relief as he covered his whole face with his knit had to ward off the cold wind and kept drifting into Safety Valve’s circle of safety and windmilling him in the face. I think he actually wore it like that for the entire warmup.

    YHC then explained what we’d be doing and why–some of the PAX knew already and some didn’t–and we split into teams of three, grabbed one coupon per team, and headed to the lower field.

    The tribute would consist of a Dora-like routine wherein teams of three would complete the following exercises/reps:
    -B: Burpees 200
    -I: Imperial Walkers 300
    -S: Side Straddle Hops 400
    -H: Heels to Heaven 300
    -O: Ono’s (Apolo Ono’s) 200 (2:1)
    -P: Peter Parker Merkins 100
    There were two cones set up about 15 yards apart, and while one of the trio chipped away at the burpees, another at the other cone started on the Imperial Walkers, and the third traveled from the first to the second via block-and-bear. Upon arrival, he took over on the Imperial Walker reps, and the second traversed back via block-and-bear to take over on burpees. Once a rep count was completed, that side would move onto the next letter’s exercise.

    Yankee Joe came running over just as YHC was completing the explanation, but unfortunately, he made number 13, so we had to send him all the way back to grab another coupon so he could join one of the groups and make a foursome, requiring two men to block-and-bear together. He didn’t complain, though, and shared that he had heard about Bishop that morning, and though he may not have planned to be there otherwise, he had rushed out to the door to support YHC. That was deeply moving, and YHC was almost sorry to have to put him through such a grueling routine…almost.

    It started rough and remained rough throughout, especially with the cold coupons numbing the fingers, making it hard to tell if you were fully gripping the block on the pulls. But, the variations of exercises and switching between them made it a little more doable (a little). Once all had finished except Suckle and AB (that’s how you know there may have been some widespread form-fudging), the rest of the PAX took 5 PPMerkins apiece to fill the gap, and we lined up for the next movement.

    Indian Run via the road to the far gate (by the chimney field), the last guy dropping to do 3 genuflections before running to the front. This was tougher than it otherwise would have been, obviously because of the effort that was just poured in by the PAX, and the cold wind was a-blowin’. Once we arrived at the gate, YHC called a halt to share some words and an explanation of what we’d be doing next.

    Bishop Dorsonville loved intensely. He yearned for familial relationships, and he naturally gave himself over, opening his heart wide to those he encountered. This was often exhausting for him, especially as he encountered more and more people here, and many of them weren’t always sure how to receive such an intense, sincere, familial love. This was painful for him, particularly since he had no family or friends here to fall back on, no place to be safe and comfortable with people who knew his heart, to whom he already belonged. But, he didn’t stop. He continued to press on and show up and pour himself out, praying for strength and growing connections with people here. Thankfully, Cardinal’s prayer led him to say yes to the request to be Bishop’s full-time secretary (which is more of like a partner/assistant), and God allowed he and his family to provide a “home” for him. God also allowed YHC and family to give him some harbor in the storm when he’d visit the house to feel at home with the mess and beauty of family life.

    To honor this intense, often painful journey of pouring himself out unreservedly for the people here, we would run as hard as we could from there via the road to the parking area in front of the main building, just past the Thunderdome. It was about 1/3 of a mile, which was long enough to be friggin’ hard, but not long enough to get into a groove or find a good pace. He was the Bishop for only 9 months, which was long enough to be deeply difficult but not long enough to get comfortable.

    YHC sent Yote and the 2.0’s on the shorter route between the fields, and we lined up. On signal, we took off at a hard pace and kept it hard–YHC could hear the footsteps of Suckle not far behind, and the rest were not far behind him. The body was exhausted, but we had a good reason to offer it up, to not measure how much more we could take, especially because we knew it would end soon enough. This part hit YHC hard, and the tears wanted to take over, but the opportunity to pour it all out and the support of this awesome crew provided the drive needed to put the pedal to the metal. (And, it almost provided YHC’s first career pukeage, too.)

    We went down to the field and grabbed the gear before heading back to the flag for COT, and Dox prayed us out, all of us focusing on Cardinal’s grief and Bishop’s eternal rest.
    Thanks, again, gentlemen, for your support and for entering into an unforeseen tribute beatdown in sub-freezing temperatures. F3 continues to be a deeper, more important gift than I know any of us could’ve ever expected.

    SYITG,
    Goose

  • I Want Candy – from Cardinal

    Isn’t it funny that you always want the thing you can’t have? YHC and a number of the PAX are in a period of not eating sweets, so to channel the newfound desire for anything with sugar, YHC dove into the exicon to see what sweet treats could be unearthed. After a little thought, a beatdown was born.

    Warmorama was almost the standard fare (IW, WM, AC, HK, BK, SL) except knowing what was coming next, SSH were skipped. This presented to be a real issue for a number of the PAX and was perhaps the most controversial part of the whole beatdown.

    All chatter was quickly silenced by the next thang – featuring the classic “I Want Candy” by Aaron Carter. The PAX would to SSH for the duration of the song, with a burpee on every time they hear “candy.” If you made it through the brutal marathon at the end, that’s 26 burpees in just over 3 minutes.

    After that, we moved into Double Apple Sauce, a 2-column Indian run where the last man in one line would run to the front of the other. This was met with varied success, looking beautifully choreographed at times and looking like a mob at other times.

    We ended at the baseball field, where the PAX were introduced to the Sugar Cookie. In the outfield, PAX did called Scuba Steve’s and leg raises, then sprinted to home plate to do 20 hand release merkins and 20 BBSU. Ideally, the dew from the grass would leave the PAX nicely coated like a sugar cookie. Alas, the moisture wasn’t there, but it was still a killer thang.

    We then DAS’d again to Aldi’s (possessive because that’s how you do it) parking lot for some Apple Turnover races – switching between bear crawl and crab walk. After that, round 2 was a Hot Apple Turnover – crawl bear and walk crabs. The PAX pushed and showed their prowess (or lack thereof) in each leg of the race.

    We moseyed back to the flag for 5 minutes of people’s choice MARY- which featured Dr. W’s and dolphin hops to no one’s surprise.

    COT and Goose prayed us out. Mom Jeans bestowed the VEST upon Smooth for pushing harder than anyone, both on and off the court so to speak.

    Grateful to the PAX for letting me take them on a sweet journey! Till next time…

    -Cardinal

  • Every Morning in Africa… – from Paradox

    “Every morning in Africa a gazelle wakes up and knows it must be faster than the fastest lion or it will be killed.
    Every morning in Africa a lion wakes up and knows it must be faster than the slowest gazelle or it will starve.
    It doesn’t matter whether you are a lion or a gazelle, when the sun comes up you better be running “
    -African proverb

    Todays beatdown inspiration was a bit of a “give a mouse a cookie” situation. YHC recently saw the above quote and tucked it away into the “beatdown ingredient “folder for later. Shortly after that YHC read a Nola backblast (shoutout to Charmin) with a “catch me if you can” modification called lions and gazelles. Shortly after THAT Gooses new years beatdown had pax 1 mile run times posted and YHC wondered what type of burpee handicap would put the pax on an equal running field. The blend was coming together, was just missing another ingredient when I saw my 2.0s running scared in the yard…hmmm….a dash of fear…just right! Now just need a heat source to cook this meal …or perhaps …perhaps this is a dish best served cold…

    Duke!! Get away from that watering hole and roll that beautiful beatdown footage!

    7 pax fought through icy windshields and hastily searched pants drawers to get better on a Tuesday Tuff at the stage. 25 degrees at alarm time with 15 mph wind puts us at a respectable F3 nation GMI of 14 (32-current degree F plus PAX attendance). We felt the kindred spirit with our F3 brothers in the northeast and midwest that call this weather “spring” .

    YHC started the partner work early at home when attempting to unfreeze the truck too late but Valve was ready and waiting with the cutting-edge Ford technology across the street so we headed down 308 together silently waiting to see if Yankee ever found pants. Team Platinum soon found Goose and Ronnie (with leg coverings!) loitering in the cold with Jeaux and Popeye close behind.
    Today’s goals were simple. Never stop moving and get the pax home with all their fingers and toes and wives leggings intact.

    Warmup
    Heavy Cardio warmup with a double dose of MCs to get the heart charged and blood to the fingers if only for a second.

    Continued Warmup
    Indian Run around Richmans Loop to let the pax see the Serengeti and prime the watering holes (drop off cones)
    Drop off to 3 Jillian Michael’s (haven’t missed those)

    YHC tried to find the song that would transport the pax to a sunny tropical state of mind so we ran while the Beach Boys told us about a place way down in Kokomo. This served to warm our hearts for about 2 seconds until turning the corner on the flat land of richmans loop and feeling the full force of the wind. We did not get there fast or take it slow and the Beach Boys would be ashamed but we did end up where we wanted to go and picked up a wild Dilly while out in the bush!

    Da Main Thang a Lang

    LIONS VS GAZELLES

    Da Rules:
    -Lion starts by doing 15 burpees while gazelles take off from starting line
    -Gazelles must do assigned exercise and reps at each “watering holes” before progressing
    -the lion can kill (tag) you at any time and is immune from watering hole exercises
    -You can only run forward
    -Pax must stay on the road
    -When tagged you are “dead “, complete 10 burpees and mosey back to starting line
    -if you make it back “home” no penalty
    -The lion will do 2 penalty burpees for every living gazelle who makes it home.

    Round 1
    Lion Goose vs Gazelle PAX—Score: Goose 6 Gazelles 0
    Gazelles made a respectable trek to in between the second and third watering hole before Lion Goose unleashed carnage. The ever cunning strategist Lion Goose ran down the leaders in cold blood then circled back for the rest. I shudder to think what Pope will do in this format.

    Round 2
    Lion Jeaux vs Gazelle PAX- Score Jeax 1 Gazelles 5
    Only change is 10 merkins which in Jeaux’s defense went much quicker than YHC expected and may have put us ahead early. Most of the gazelles made it home to their families. Lion Jeaux did not starve but later commented that the Gazelle Dilly was “a little gamey” for him. Sadly there will be a zoo truck coming soon to “transfer him to a better place”.

    Round 3
    Lion Popeye vs Gazelle PAX- Score Pop 6 Gazelles 0
    12 Burpees for the Lion this round to start, 5 Jump Squats at watering holes.
    Lion runs forward while pax Nur and stare down our impending death. YHC tilted this one a touch in the favor of the Lion to ensure maximum effort. The nur/jump squat combo took the gazelles down fast and Popeye came around the first bend of Richmans loop like a persistent tank rolling down gazelles with reckless abandon. He took YHC and Goose just after cone 2 with a gentle tap that and nod that it was time death and for more burpees.

    Round 4 – Partner race for home
    P1 sprint to next light and MC
    P2 MC till p1 is stopped at next light
    YHC sowed some confusion early by saying leap frog but performing something different. The pax adjusted well and every team stayed in close contention.

    Formed up to finish a standard Indian run home with a sprint finish

    Just enough time for a little Proud Mary, this is an old Goose classic and never gets old
    Assorted abs on the song with Big Boys on “Rolling”.

    Just before the song we realized the wind had taken down Ole Glory on our shovel flag. Goose fiddled with putting it back together but he is not one to miss a session of Mary so he resolutely held the stars and stripes up and off the ground while torching abdominals down below. Never been prouder of my site Q.

    The Counting, the Naming and we found ANIMAL inside of the seventeenth layer of YJs clothes. It was given to Pop in honor of his Gazelle feast in round 3.

    Announcements:
    RCR sign ups and prep
    It’s Only a Mile – Feb 17th

    COT and Ronnie prayed us out

    Moleskin:
    We can be motivated, at least temporarily, by many things.
    There can be comfort (Kokomo in 25 degrees weather), control (how many reps?), fear (is that Popeye or the grim reaper?). These are mostly internal motivations that we reach for in the face of adversity. But what the pax of F3 Thibodaux consistently teach YHC is the value of an external motivation. One detached from my own needs and desires. Reaching outside of oneself for your children, your spouse or just that sweaty dude next to you who keeps making 3 inches jokes. When we find this extra gear of shared suffering it’s amazing to see the reservoir of strength that God provides with it.
    Thanks for the effort despite the brutal condition’s today men.

    It’s a privilege to lead

    Epilogue

    Every morning in Thibodaux the Gloom awaits men knowing it will capture many with struggle and snares.
    Every morning in Thibodaux the pax wake up knowing they must work hard to beat the gloom.
    And that when the sun rises, there will be men at his side, pushing to make each other a little better each day.

    SYITG
    Dox

  • Gose’-palooza – from Goose

    YHC showed up solo to a beatdown for the first time in quite a while, and sat solo in an empty parking lot wondering if the Goose hype on GroupMe on another Sunday night caused the fartsack factor to rise in PAXville to a dangerous, pre-2023 level. Actually, YHC was gonna have to split 10 minutes early to get Pope to Schriever to catch a bus to D.C. for the March for Life, so it was gonna be a weird morning, anyway. Going back home was starting to look the least bit attractive when Hyundai lights swung lazily around the corner carrying a VESTED Cardinal into the lot. A Cardinal one-on-one actually sounded like fun, but not nearly as much fun as a foursome with Safety Valve and the brand-spankin’-new Mom Jeans! t’s been over a week since YHC was with the Thib PAX, and it was so good to be back!!

    Warmups started a minute late, though MJ side-straddled-hopped deftly from his Dilly truck all the way to the circle. We utilized the usuals, but YHC introduced the crew to the Lafayette version of Moroccan Night Clubs, which is more like a grizzly bear roar move–arms up and toward the front at like 45 degrees. It was different, but, man, you can feel the much needed popping and creaking.

    After a bumper to Stop sign mosey, YHC unveiled the “FNG”, the newly minted “Gose’”, a bluetooth Christmas miracle of clarity, bass, volume, connectivity, and dashing good looks. Though the tunes chosen for the morning weren’t the best examples of artistic complexity, Gose’ cranked them out with noticeable expertise. The PAX can expect many great things to come from this specimen of sound output.

    Once YHC started the song/exercise pairing, ideas came flowing like Snapple. Late 90’s garbage piled up on YHC’s Spotify list, and muscle burn was on the menu. It would be a Gose’-palooza until 5:50am, after which the PAX would receive instruction for how to finish the beatdown without a Q.

    1. “I Wish (I was a baller)” by Skee-lo: hold plank, merkins on “wish”
    2. “Funky Duck” by Vulfpeck: burpees on “duck” (This is a fun one–stupid enough for the kids, funky enough for the adults).
    –YHC: “Just chill between burpees.”
    –Valve: “So, solid burpees.”
    –YHC: “You’ve learned much.”
    3. “Mari-Mac” by Great Big Sea: hold flutter kick position, flutter on every “Mary” or “marry”
    4. “Brimful of Asha” by Cornershop: heel raises for the duration, genuflection on “45” and “bosom”
    5. “Here Comes the Hotstepper” by Ini Kamoze: penguins for the duration, big boys on every “murderer”

    At this point, it was 5:50, so YHC trusted Cardinal to lean into the VEST and lead the remaining PAX around Rich Man’s Loop and through potluck Mary till 6:00. YHC drove by at exactly 6, and it looked like he pulled through. It was a heroic, complex task requiring intelligence and leadership, but he still pulled it off. Well done, Cardinal.

    No idea who got the VEST, but YHC is grateful for this crew posting on a Monday and working through the ridiculousness. Looking forward to great things from Mom Jeans! It’s nice to have some respect around here!

    SYITG,
    Goose

  • What’s an ARK? – F3 Greenwood – from Enron

    YHC has been struggling with a cold/cough this past month so preparations for a Q were limited. Not calling out a certain PCP though… Anyways, some digging into record books was needed to pull out something that would be worthwhile for the PAX’s never-ending desire for pain. F3 Greenwood and their IPC have always seemed to have the ticket to putting things at a level that seems achievable on paper but once in action seems worthwhile to have stayed home. After researching backblast the plan was settled. The hype was sent out and on we went.

    10 PAX showed up to the den ready to roll.

    Warmarama:
    SSH, Windmills, IW, Willie Mays Hayes, AC, MC, Self-Love, Mosey around the Civic center.

    The Thang:
    Noah was told by God to build an Ark. To do this, Noah had to pick out the right trees and cut them down.

    Gathering Lumber
    3 rounds
    1 minute Al Gore (Tree Hugger) – These minute(s) seemed to get longer and longer as we went. Paradox’s chatter could be heard from the other end of the line.
    10 Chopping Wood Lunges
    Once the lumber was gathered, Noah started building the Ark. God directed Noah to build the Ark to very specific dimensions (300 cubits by 30 cubits by 50 cubits).

    Building the A.R.K.
    Alternating Shoulder Taps Merkins x 300
    Reverse Crunches x 30 (AB, these were not gas pumps despite what the remainder of the PAX had to say about the air down on the other end of the field)
    Karaoke x 50
    The pax partnered up to build the Ark. Pax 1 drops to the plank position and starts Alternating shoulder tap Merkins. Pax #2 Mosey 50 yards and drops to do 30 reverse crunches then Karaoke back and swap out.

    In Genesis 7:8, the Ark has been built so the animals start coming in by twos for Noah to load onto the boat.

    Animals 2 by 2
    AMRAP until time is called.
    Start with 2 reps for each station and add 2 each time you move to the next station.
    4 Stations
    Station 1 – Crunchy Frog
    Station 2 – Monkey Humpers
    Station 3 – Dolphin Hops – Yes, Dolphins on a boat, it makes sense because they were hopping
    Station 4 – Penguins
    PAX choice to, Bear Crawl, Crab walk, or Duck walk between Stations.
    “Recover” called at 6:00

    Announcements for the upcoming Run Cajun Run event in February as well as the upcoming ACTs retreat.
    COT and Piccadilly prayed us out. Excellent work on a tough beatdown from F3 Greenwood.

    Till next time,
    Enron